“This is my shirt.” She tugged on the shirt Charlie had no idea belonged to her.
“It is?” she asked and pushed Hailey’s hair back behind her ears. “How did I get it?”
Hailey looked at her like that was a stupid question.
“Do you know how many of your shirts I probably have at my apartment?” She leaned back in and pressed her lips to Charlie’s jawline. “I’ve wanted to kiss you here for a while,” she stated confidently and applied her lips a little lower, making Charlie gasp out. “And here.” She pressed warm lips to cool skin, and Charlie shuddered. “God, Charlie. I’m sorry it took me so long.” She pulled back and met Charlie’s dark eyes.
Charlie felt like she was about to burst into tears, but they’d be happy tears if she did.
“It’s okay. You’re here now.” She buried her hands into Hailey’s hair and pulled her back into her, reveling in the sensations that were taking her body by storm. Hailey’s lips were on her neck and then her tongue was dragging up and toying with her earlobe, while her hands were sliding down. Charlie gasped as Hailey’s fingers grazed the button of her jeans without attempting to undo them. It was as if she was testing the waters. Charlie’s brain was muddled. She didn’t know what the right thing to do was. Should she stop this, so they could talk and take things slowly? Should she let it continue because she’d waited so long and because it seemed that Hailey wanted it too?
She felt Hailey’s hands grip her waist and she was placed on top of her counter. Her legs were spread and Hailey was standing between them. Had she helped Hailey get her up there or was Hailey that strong? She heard a moan and realized that it was Hailey who was making the sound. Hailey’s hands were lifting at Charlie’s shirt, and they disconnected so she could remove it, but the moment the shirt was pulled over her face, Charlie heard the familiar sound of a key card in her front door.
“Shit.” Hailey stood away from her.
Charlie lowered her shirt and then her body off the counter. Ember Elliot walked through the door as Charlie scurried over to a cabinet to pretend she was pulling something out of it.
“Em? What are you doing here?” Charlie asked in an attempt at nonchalance. “Hails, here’s that… bag of rice you wanted.” She shook her head at herself, as the item she’d pulled down from the cabinet without looking was a bag of rice she didn’t even know she had.
She tossed it onto the counter in front of Hailey, who picked it up and stared at it for a moment.
“Oh, right. Yeah, thanks.” Hailey turned to Ember. “I was going to make stir fry tonight,” she lied.
“Alright, what the hell is going on with you two?” Ember wiggled an accusing finger at both of them. “And Hailey, when have you ever made stir fry?” She sat her bag on the counter and crossed her arms over her chest.
“It’s a new recipe I’m trying.” Hailey’s voice got even softer as she tried to continue the lie.
Charlie just laughed, because she couldn’t help it. That caused Hailey to give her the ‘are you kidding me right now’ look. Ember sat on the stool next to Hailey.
“You guys have been acting weird since yesterday. What happened?” she asked. She looked back and forth between them again. “Oh, my God, just tell me already!”
Hailey smirked and rolled her eyes. Charlie stared at her impatient friend.
“We’re dating,” Charlie said after a minute.
“I knew it!” Ember stood and then pointed at each of them in turn. “I knew it. I told Eva you two were doing it, and she didn’t believe me.” She pulled her phone out of her back pocket.
“What are you doing?”
“Texting her that I was right, obviously,” Ember replied.
Hailey took the phone out of her hand and placed it on the counter.
“We’re not doing it,” she delivered. “I mean, we haven’t, yet. We haven’t done that yet.”
Charlie lifted an eyebrow with the word ‘yet’, and somehow put it together just in that moment that dating Hailey would mean they would have sex. She knew that before, but that comment from Hailey was the first confirmation she had that Hailey wanted that too. Knowing that Hailey had touched herself the previous weekend, thinking about it, had been a nice to hear, but this was bigger than that. This was after their first date, after their first kiss, and Hailey wanted more.
“Oh, I just assumed that since Charlie’s wanted it forever, and you’ve been acting crazy lately, that you would have just gone right for it.” Ember meant it in a teasing tone, but Charlie wasn’t looking at Ember.
She was staring at Hailey, who’s face showed something only for a moment before she smiled again. Charlie wasn’t sure what to make of that.
“Well, we have self-control,” Hailey returned.
She couldn’t hide the smirk on her face from Charlie, because they hadn’t had self-control a minute ago, when Hailey lifted her onto the counter and spread her legs to stand between them. Just the thought of that had Charlie turned on and feeling a pulse between her legs.
“We’ve been on one date so far. That’s why we left yesterday,” Charlie explained. “And Hailey just got here, right before you did, to talk about the second date.”
“I’m really happy for you guys,” Ember stated. “This has been a long time coming. I worried for a while that it wouldn’t happen. But I’m so glad it is.” She paused at a realization. “This is going to be great, guys. Alyssa and Hannah on one side of the aisle, as the old married couple, Eva and I getting married in the middle, and then you two on the other side, just starting out.” She seemed genuinely happy for them. “I guess we don’t have to worry about giving either of you a plus-one for the ceremony.” She grabbed her phone and then looked back at Charlie. “Actually, I don’t think we even planned on that, because we just figured you two would go together.” She looked at Hailey. “Wait. What about Emma?”
“We’re not…” Hailey dropped off, and Charlie saw a little flicker of pain there.
“And you, with that woman you met at work? Lena?”
“We never really got started, but we’re not going to now. I think we’re going to be friends,” Charlie explained.
She looked back at Hailey who was smiling again. Damn, that girl could go from one emotion to the next so quickly. Charlie had no idea what any of it meant. Ember smiled wide and typed out a message, presumably, to her fiancée.
“I’m bragging to Eva right now, because I told her you two would make this happen before the wedding. She said if you ever did it at all, it would be after, so I win the bet,” Ember said and tucked her phone away.
“You bet on us?” Hailey probably didn’t mean it the way it sounded initially, but then she glanced over at Charlie and lifted a corner of her mouth, telling Charlie silently that she realized how it sounded after she said it.
“Can I be honest for a second?” Ember offered and stood between the two of them. “I’ve been waiting for one of you to tell the other forever. I knew how Charlie felt. That was obvious to everyone other than you, Hails, but that’s not all your fault. Charlie didn’t want you to see it, so she hid it from you. I don’t even think Charlie wanted to see it herself there for a while. But then, while I was off dating woman after woman, you two always seemed to be together without being together.”
“We weren’t-” Charlie started.
“We’re all best friends, right?” Ember challenged.
“What? Of course, we are,” Charlie replied.
“When was the last time you bought me my favorite cereal for when I stay over? Hell, when was the last time I even stayed over?” She turned to Hailey. “How many times have you stayed at this apartment since she moved in? How many times has either of you sat next to me at Sally’s? How many times have you two just gone places together, instead of finding dates, when you are both attractive, successful and pretty awesome women, who would have no trouble finding them?” She paused. “I’ve kept this to myself this whole time. I’m glad I don’t have to anymore.” Her p
hone beeped in her pocket, and she pulled it out to look at it. She smiled and swiftly typed back another message. “She conceded. I win.”
“What exactly do you win?” Charlie questioned.
“You probably don’t want the details.” She winked. “Well, I only stopped by because neither of you were calling me like you said you would.” She glanced at Hailey. “Separately, right?” She recalled Hailey’s inability to lie well the day before. “Now that I know you’re safe and together, I will leave you alone.”
“And because you want to go collect your prize,” Hailey stated with a laugh.
“And collect and collect.” Ember smiled and backed away toward the door. “Really happy for you guys.”
She made her way toward the door, petting Eddie as she went, and then closed it behind her.
“So…”
“Yeah, so.” Charlie nodded in agreement.
“Rice, huh?” Hailey looked down at the bag of rice on the counter.
Charlie followed her eyes and then reached for it to put it back into the cabinet.
“It was all I could think of,” she replied and tossed the bag into the cabinet unceremoniously. “I don’t even remember buying a bag of rice. Why the hell would I do that?”
Hailey walked around the island counter to stand in front of her.
“You didn’t. I did,” she shared. “You don’t remember?” she asked. Charlie shook her head no. “I was dating-”
“That woman who just moved here from Tokyo.” Charlie recalled almost immediately. “You bought a bunch of stuff to try to cook dinner for her.” Charlie returned to the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of Asian hot sauce. “She broke up with you before you got the chance, and you couldn’t look at the stuff, so I brought it over here, and I completely forgot about it.”
“I can’t believe you still have it,” Hailey said.
“It was food. I wasn’t going to throw it out. Plus, at that time, you seemed convinced that she was going to come to her senses and tell you she wanted you back. I kept it in case that happened, and you needed it,” Charlie revealed. Hailey took a step back, and Charlie watched her obviously taking her in. “What?”
◆◆◆
Hailey stood, looking Charlie up and down. She was wearing Hailey’s shirt, she had her cereal in her apartment. She’d stayed over more times than she could count, only to wake up to Charlie making her coffee, and then they’d go about their days. Some nights, she even came straight here from work, they’d eat dinner together and watch a movie or just talk. She’d see Charlie fall asleep in her room, as she walked past to go to the bathroom and turned Charlie’s TV off for her, or made sure she was covered up, because Charlie often fell asleep above the blankets on her bed.
“What?” Charlie asked her.
“Can we order in dinner and watch a movie tonight?” Hailey asked her.
“That sounds nice,” Charlie answered. “I still kind of have some work I need to get done, though. It shouldn’t take too long.”
“Work on it. I can order food and occupy myself,” Hailey said.
“Okay.” Charlie smiled at her and took a step forward.
Hailey felt the press of now familiar lips on her forehead.
“Chinese?” Hailey asked.
“Yes, but get extra egg rolls,” Charlie told her, slid her hand along Hailey’s stomach over her shirt, and headed toward her desk. “You ate them all last time.”
“You ate all the shrimp last time,” she called after her.
“Then, get extra shrimp too,” Charlie suggested and sat down in her chair.
Hailey watched Eddie doing his dance by the front door.
“I’ll take this guy out first.” She walked to Eddie, who sat down for her so that she could attach his leash. “He’d never eat all of my shrimp.” She rubbed behind his ear.
“He would absolutely eat all of your shrimp,” Charlie stated without turning around.
Hailey stood upright and glanced around the space. Charlie was working. Hailey was taking the dog out. They’d eat dinner together and have a simple night in. Maybe Charlie would invite her to stay over, and this time Hailey would sleep next to her, and not just as friends. She was beaming as she walked Eddie around the block and ran into another dog he must have known, because they sniffed and then danced around one another, while Hailey and the other dog’s owner just watched before pulling them apart. She called the Chinese place while she walked back and ordered them their dinner. Knowing it would take over thirty minutes for the food to arrive, she headed back upstairs, let herself into the apartment, and allowed Eddie to run around the room. Charlie had turned to see she was back and delivered a smile in her direction before turning back to her computer. Hailey didn’t want to distract her, but she also felt like she just needed to touch her. It was a strange feeling, this need to be this close to Charlie, after she’d known her for so long. But she felt this desire to touch her back, her neck, her shoulders, and it wasn’t sexual. It was sweet how she wanted to touch her. The pull was too strong. She walked over to Charlie, placing a hand on one shoulder while she leaned down against the other.
“Food’s on its way,” she said into Charlie’s ear.
“Thank you,” Charlie replied and wrapped a hand around Hailey’s neck to pull her a little closer. “This is nice,” she said.
“It is,” Hailey agreed and kissed her lightly on the neck before pulling back. “Will the TV bother you?”
“No, go ahead,” Charlie returned.
Hailey made her way to the couch, sat down and turned on the TV. She quickly found something to entertain her while she waited for the food and for Charlie to finish her work.
“Well, this is going to be weird,” Charlie said after several minutes.
“What is?” Hailey turned to see that Charlie was making her way to the couch to sit next to her.
“I got an email from Emma,” Charlie stated with a concerned look.
“What?” Hailey turned to face her.
“She sent it on Friday. It’s for the work I’m doing for the Health Department. It’s not personal, but it’s going to be weird. The project is still ongoing. I’ll have to see her.”
“I hadn’t even thought about that,” Hailey said. “I forgot you guys were working together.”
“It shouldn’t be too much longer, but I will have to meet with her at least a couple more times,” she started. “The building was in a pretty good shape, and the contractor we use is really good. They’ll be finished with the major alterations in a couple of weeks. We’re already starting on the interior, structural stuff. Then, it’s just moving things in and around and making sure electric is good, but that’s not mine to worry about. My team can handle the final inspection with her, and then we’ll be done.”
“So, like a couple of months?”
“Probably. Will that be weird for you? Me seeing her?”
“I think it will be weirder for her, but she’s a professional. She’ll be fine.”
“Why do you think that?” Charlie asked.
“She still hopes that one day…” Hailey faded out.
“That one day you’ll get together?” Charlie checked. “I thought you said it ended.”
“It did, Charlie.” Hailey took her hand and then heard Eddie scamper toward the door a second before the doorbell rang. She stood and went to grab her purse. “It’s over, but she still has feelings for me.” She paid the delivery man and then sat the food on the counter, while Charlie still sat on the couch staring off into space. “Charlie, you just ended things with Lena, too. Do you think her feeling just went away?”
“Lena isn’t Emma, Hails.” Charlie stood and walked to the counter where Hailey was busy pulling out the food.
“What’s that mean?”
“I dated Lena for a couple of weeks. We kissed a few times, but that was it. You and Emma were together for a long time. She was your first girlfriend. You loved her, and compared every girlfriend after to her. That’s a lot t
o live up to, Hailey.” Charlie offered.
Hailey stopped with the food and met Charlie’s eyes.
“Charlie, I’m not comparing you to Emma.”
“Why not? You did it with every other woman?” Charlie returned.
“You’re not every other woman,” Hailey explained, wondering where this was all coming from. “Charlie, you’re not every other woman, okay? I’m not comparing anything about you to anything about Emma.” She paused. “Besides, what do you think it’s like living up to the fact that you’ve had feelings for me since we met?”
“Living up to it?” Charlie looked upset and confused. “What do you have to live up to, Hails?”
“That version of me you have in your head.”
“Version? What are you talking about?”
“Charlie, you’ve pictured us together for years, right? You’ve had this image in your mind, whether you wanted to or not, of us together; and fantasy rarely lives up to reality.”
“So, you’re worried I’m comparing the actual you to some image I have of you in my head?”
“How can I not, Charlie? How can I not do that? You’ve been in this a lot longer than I have. I’ve just figured out that I like you as more than a friend and want this with you, but you’re in love with me; and have been forever. Apparently, everyone else figured it out, but I was so deaf, dumb, and blind, that I didn’t. I looked around earlier and realized that it’s been obvious. It’s so obvious that we’ve been doing this without really doing anything this whole time.”
“Doing what? Hails, why are you getting upset?” Charlie took a step toward her.
“We’ve been dating without really dating, Charlie, and I can picture it. I can picture all of it with you. I can see us living here together one day. It feels good to think about it, but I’m still scared.” She felt tears welling up in her eyes. “I’m terrified that now that you have me, you won’t want this me. You’ll be reaching for the one you’ve been in love with all these years, and I’m scared that I’ll never be able to catch up to what you feel for me because I was too oblivious to see it before.”
Just Tell Her Page 21