After Thought

by P. A. Crenshaw

  “Let’s do it,” he said.

  She began to look around at their surroundings as she said, “Let’s start with something small.”

  She stood and walked around in the grassy clearing where some wildflowers had started to bloom and butterflies fluttered around her.

  Her eyes lingered on the butterflies as she said, “How about we start with a butterfly?”

  Adam shrugged. He was game for anything, but he wasn’t sure what she meant.

  “A butterfly?”

  She nodded and said, “Yes. That will be a perfect thing to start with. Think of a butterfly, but not just any butterfly. You have to think of a butterfly that is unique. Make it your own, with distinct markings and colors. It must be a butterfly unique enough that you would know it if you saw it again later. It can’t look like any of these common butterflies. You have to be able to know without a doubt that it is the butterfly you manifested.”

  Adam lay back on the blanket, closed his eyes, and tried to think of a unique butterfly. He didn’t know anything about butterflies. He had never really paid any attention to what they looked like or what was common or uncommon. So he just made one up in his mind. He didn’t even know if the butterfly he imagined really existed or not. But in his mind he pictured a neon-blue butterfly with thin black lines outlining the edges of each wing, and even thinner black lines sort of spider-webbing throughout the wings like veins. In the bottom quadrant of the wings, he pictured a yellow circle with black markings inside of the circle that almost made it look like an eye on each wing. He held the thought of that specific butterfly in his mind for several minutes. Then he sat up, opened his eyes, and said, “Okay. I’ve got it.”

  Maddie said, “Now keep thinking of that butterfly. You must believe that the butterfly already exists and that you will see it soon. You must believe you have already received it, and be thankful for it, and know without a doubt that the butterfly will appear.”

  Adam looked around the grassy meadow and noticed that all the butterflies in the vicinity were yellow. He didn’t see any neon-blue butterflies anywhere. He wondered if he had pictured a butterfly that didn’t even exist. He tried to put that negative thought out of his mind immediately. He tried to keep visualizing the butterfly in his mind—his butterfly.

  The sun was starting to set and it was getting dark, so they packed up their things to go. Adam never did see his butterfly that day, but Maddie assured him that it would come. He just had to believe. She told him to think about the butterfly every chance he got so that it would materialize. He was determined to make it happen. As they drove home that evening, and in the following days, Adam thought of the butterfly often.

  Chapter 33

  Maddie and Adam settled into a routine in the days following the fishing trip. Adam was beginning to quit worrying about Maddie leaving. It appeared that she had truly made up her mind to stay. So he relaxed a little bit about letting her out of his sight. Even so, they were pretty much inseparable when they weren’t working.

  About four days after the fishing trip, Adam went to the farmers market to get some fresh herbs for the gourmet meal that he was planning to prepare for Maddie that evening. As he was walking down the street, he passed a sidewalk newsstand. A Rolling Stone magazine caught his eye. One of his favorite musicians was on the front cover, and he stopped to look at it. As he reached for the magazine, his hand froze in mid-air. In that instant, a butterfly landed on the corner of that very magazine. And it wasn’t just any butterfly. It was a neon-blue butterfly with black outlining the wings and black spider webbing through the wings like veins. On the lower half of each wing was a yellow circle with black markings that made it look like an eye. It was the butterfly. It was his butterfly—the butterfly he had pictured in his mind.

  Adam’s heart was beating fast. He could hardly contain his excitement. He had manifested something! He needed proof. His first thought was to swat it, kill it, and take it back to show Maddie. But he figured she probably wouldn’t be happy about that. So instead, he held his breath as he slowly took his cell phone out of his pocket and snapped a few pictures of it before it flew away.

  He had done it. RTP had actually worked. He had manifested the butterfly. Sure, it took him four days to do it, but he had done it nonetheless. He was so excited. He texted the picture of the butterfly to Maddie. She responded almost immediately.

  “I knew you could do it!”

  Adam couldn’t wait to get back to the apartment and tell her all about it and show her more pictures. It was the greatest feeling. It was at that moment that he knew beyond a doubt he could master RTP. It might take some time and a lot of work, but he knew he could do it. And by the nature of RTP, that was all he needed—to believe he could do it. He realized that was what it would take. And now he was a true believer.

  Chapter 34

  The next few months went by with no major incidents, no natural disasters, and no near-death experiences. There was no sign of Paul or his cronies. Maddie still suspected that breaking her usual pattern and returning to New York City had thrown them off. She and Adam also theorized that maybe the KTP thought they had succeeded in their mission by killing her in the avalanche. Whatever the case, they were just glad the KTP seemed to be leaving them alone.

  Adam and Maddie decided to make the most of every moment together. They tried to put Maddie’s past out of their minds. They were inseparable. Maddie went to every rehearsal and every gig with Adam. They spent so much time together that Zach and Claire and the others gradually began to trust Maddie again. They, and Adam, began to believe she was back to stay and would not hurt Adam again. And even though Zach couldn’t bring himself to completely forgive her, at least he tolerated her and treated her with respect, if only to preserve his friendship with Adam.

  Adam had been practicing using Refined Transcendent Power daily, and he was getting pretty good at manifesting what he called “little things,” like the butterfly, or getting a gig at a certain venue, or making a good call on a stock market trade, or getting random things in the mail. He couldn’t make things happen instantly like Maddie did, but he was able to manifest things more quickly. Instead of the four days it took for the butterfly to appear, he could now make some things happen in a day or two, or even sometimes in a few hours. But he had yet to manifest what he considered to be a “big thing,” like a new sports car, or a large sum of money, or a major-label recording contract. He realized that the limiting factor was himself—or his mind, to be more specific. He still had a hard time believing that he could manifest a mansion or a million dollars or anything big like that.

  One evening Maddie and Adam were talking over dinner about his progress in learning to use RTP. She sensed that something was bothering him and asked, “What’s on your mind? You don’t seem like yourself tonight.”

  He said, “Well, I was wondering if you could give me some pointers on how I can materialize the ‘big things.’ I’m having a hard time believing I can do it.”

  She put her hand over his and said, “You’re doing everything right. There is no difference in the process of manifesting ‘little things’ or ‘big things.’ It’s the same method. It is just as easy to manifest a one-hundred dollar bill as it is to manifest a one dollar bill. The only difference is your belief that it’s easier to manifest a one dollar bill.”

  “I hear what you’re saying, and I understand,” he said. “I’m just having a hard time. It’s such a mind game.”

  “It’s only a mind game if you believe it’s a mind game,” she reminded him.

  “I really want to believe. I mean, I want to believe I’m not going to age. I want to believe I can have or be anything I can imagine in life. I want to believe in it all. But you have to understand that, other than you, I have never known anyone who can manifest the ‘big things.’ ”

  Maddie tilted her head and looked at the ceiling as she pursed her lips. T
hen she looked at him and said, “How can I explain this? You see, sometimes it does take longer to manifest what you call the ‘big things.’ But it isn’t because it is harder to do. It’s just that sometimes the things we want in life require action. Take getting a recording contract, for example. It is very unlikely that you could get a recording contract without ever practicing an instrument or singing a day in your life. It doesn’t work that way. The goal of getting a recording contract takes time and practice. Granted, it happens more quickly for some people than for others, but still there are certain steps that have to be taken to attain it. Do you understand what I mean?”

  “I think so,” he said, nodding.

  “Okay,” she continued. “Take a million dollars, for example. It is possible to manifest a million dollars quickly, perhaps by winning the lottery or by getting a large inheritance suddenly. But for some, there are actions that are required to obtain a million dollars, like working hard, making wise investments, and saving money. There is no right or wrong time that it takes to manifest something big. There is just the belief that it is possible. And if you truly believe that you are not aging, then time is not so important anymore because you’ve got an endless amount of time. So what if it takes five years to manifest a million dollars or a world tour.”

  “I think I know what you’re trying to say,” he said. “But I’m impatient. I want to be like you and be able to manifest everything I want instantly.”

  “Well, if you want it bad enough and you believe it with all your heart, you too will be able to do the things that I do someday. Besides, what makes you think you haven’t already manifested everything you could possibly want?”

  “Well, not to sound totally materialistic, but I’ve been thinking about abundance, wealth, a huge, sprawling mansion, a Harley Davidson Cosmic Starship, and maybe, just maybe, a 1962 Shelby Cobra 260 CSX2000 or two—to be exact.”

  Maddie chuckled and rolled her eyes. “That’s not materialistic at all. Men and their boy toys.”

  “Well, when you tell a guy the sky’s the limit, that’s what you’re going to get.”

  “So what makes you think you haven’t manifested those things already?”

  Adam wanted to say something sarcastic but decided on, “Well, um, because I don’t see any of those things in the near vicinity.”

  “O ye of little faith.”

  Adam was perplexed. What the hell was she talking about?

  Maddie put her hand to her mouth and appeared to be deep in thought. Then she sat up straight, pointed at him, and said, “I think I know a way that might help you.”

  “I’m all ears.”

  “Do you think you could take a week off from work?”

  She had piqued his curiosity. “Yeah,” he said. “I think I could do that as long as I have my laptop with me.”

  She was in full planning mode now. “We could leave on a Sunday and return by Friday so you don’t miss any of your gigs.”

  “Sounds good. Where are we going?”

  “It’s a surprise. Just leave everything to me,” she said as she winked at him. “This is so exciting!”

  Chapter 35

  Maddie tapped her fingers on her desk as she waited for someone to answer the phone. Once she had her mind set on something, even she could be impatient. She had made sure Adam was showering at his apartment when she made the call so he couldn’t hear her conversation. She made up an excuse, saying that she needed some things from her apartment, so she could keep everything a surprise. She knew she might only have a few minutes before he came to see what she was doing. He had been snooping and begging her to tell him what she was planning every chance he got. It had become a sort of game between them. She was determined to keep it all a secret until the last-possible moment.

  She heard a click on the line and a familiar voice said, “Hey, Maddie. How are you, chica? How are things with your man, Adam?”

  “Hey, Sancha. I’m wonderful! Everything is going so well that I have to pinch myself every day to make sure I’m not dreaming.”

  “Oh, Maddie, I’m so happy to hear that!”

  “How are you and Mel doing?”

  “We’re fine. We just sold another house and we’ve been really busy with the closing and all. Business has really picked up lately. It’s a buyer’s market, you know.”

  “That’s great. I’m glad to hear it. In fact, I think I want you to tell me all about it in person.”

  “What was that? I think there’s something wrong with the line. I thought for a minute that you said you want me to tell you about it in person.”

  Maddie laughed. “There isn’t anything wrong with the line. You heard me right. I think I want to bring Adam to meet you and Mel.”

  “Oh my god! We would love to meet him. Please come.”

  “Well, you said you’re really busy and I don’t want to impose. It can wait until another, less-busy time.”

  “No! No! We’re never too busy for a visit from you. How long has it been? I can’t even remember the last time we…” Her voice trailed off.

  “I know. It’s been too long,” said Maddie with a hint of sadness in her voice.

  Sancha’s voice sounded like she was on the verge of crying, which also made Maddie want to cry. She missed her best friend. They tried not to dwell on the fact that they hardly ever got to see each other in person.

  Sancha cleared her throat and said, “So there is no more discussion about it. You and Adam are welcome to come and visit any time that you want to. You know that.”

  “I know.” Maddie hesitated and said, “Do you think it’s safe?”

  Sancha sighed and said, “I don’t have to tell you that there are no guarantees. It’s as safe as anywhere you go, I suppose. We’ve been safe here for several years now. Nobody knows where we are except for the people in the underground. So there’s no reason to believe you would be in any danger. The KTP would probably never suspect you would come back to this part of the country anyway.”

  Maddie tried to keep the sarcasm out of her voice as she said, “Well that’s real comforting.”

  “You know what I’m trying to say, Maddie. I wouldn’t tell you to come if I didn’t think it was reasonably safe.”

  “I know. I know.”

  “We really do want to meet Adam. And I would love to see you again, my friend. I miss you so much.”

  “I miss you too, and I really want you to meet Adam as well. I also wanted to show him what RTP has done in our lives. He’s trying to learn to master it, and he’s having trouble believing that he can manifest the ‘big things.’ ”

  “So many people have that same problem. It’s settled, then. When are you planning to come?”

  “Is Sunday too early?”

  “No, that’s perfect. We’ll prepare for your arrival.”

  “Don’t go to any trouble. I know how you can be. Don’t knock yourself out cooking a bunch of food and making a big fuss over us coming. Just getting to see you all will be enough.”

  “You know I love to entertain guests. This is going to be so much fun. I can’t wait!”

  “Me too!”

  “Send me your itinerary with your flight number and arrival time when you get a chance.”

  “Will do. We’ll see you Sunday then!”

  “See you Sunday!”

  Maddie clicked off and began making all of the flight and rental car arrangements. If she was lucky, she could get it all done before Adam came looking for her.

  Chapter 36

  Maddie deftly remained secretive when she made the arrangements. The only thing she did tell Adam was that they were flying out early Sunday morning, and they were headed to Albuquerque, New Mexico. She had only agreed to tell him the destination so he could look at the weather forecast and pack accordingly. Even when they got the rental car at the Albuquerque airport,
she still wouldn’t tell him exactly where they were going, so he tried to relax and just go along for the ride.

  As they left the airport, Adam admired the New Mexico scenery. It was different than anything he had ever seen—a strange mixture of mountains and high desert, beautiful in its own way. The view of the rolling foothills with the silhouette of the Sandia Mountains was awesome. They were enormous, imposing, and beautiful all at the same time. The strange yucca plants, prickly pear, and saguaro cacti made him feel like they were visiting an alien planet. Adam had never traveled far from the East Coast. This was all very new to him. Maddie explained to him that New Mexico is known as “The Land of Enchantment.” Indeed, it was an enchanting and fascinating place.

  After they drove for a while, it appeared to Adam that they were heading toward the outskirts of the city. They came to a neighborhood with enormous adobe-looking houses spread out on spacious lots across the foothills. Many had flat roofs, thick, light-tan walls, and rounded entryways to doors and courtyards. The landscapes of various cacti, desert willows, lavender, yarrow, pampas grass, and agave looked foreign to Adam, but somehow seemed perfect, even beautiful, in their environment.

  Maddie said, “These homes are built in the Pueblo Revival style, designed to mimic the appearance of the Spanish Colonial West. This architecture style merges home-building concepts from Spain with the local materials and styles of Native American tribes, particularly the Pueblo and Hopi in the Southwest.”

  “Fascinating. I’ve only seen houses like these on TV. I didn’t think I was a fan of adobe houses, but these homes are beautiful.”

  It didn’t escape Adam’s attention that all of the cars in the driveways were Lexus, Mercedes and various other expensive cars. Adam couldn’t stand the suspense much longer, but she wouldn’t tell him anything, so he just sat back and quietly observed.

  Finally, they pulled into a driveway that led to a security gate. Maddie lowered the window and pushed the intercom button. Through the static a voice answered, “How may I help you?”