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Homeroom Diaries

Page 13

by James Patterson


  Yes, it was true that panic was shooting up and down my spine and zinging out to my fingertips. I was shocked, maybe even terrified. But I quickly tamped down the screaming voice inside my head and collected my wits, along with the few available facts.

  One: My parents had died in some unspeakable way.

  Two: Someone had known about their deaths and called the police.

  Three: Our doors were locked, and there had been no obvious break-in. Aside from me, my brothers Harry and Hugo and my mother’s personal assistant, Samantha, were the only ones home.

  I went downstairs and got my phone. I called both my uncle Peter and our lawyer, Philippe Montaigne. Then I went to each of my siblings’ bedrooms, and to Samantha’s, too. And somehow, I told them each the inexpressibly horrible news that our mother and father were dead, and that it was possible they’d been murdered.

  Contents

  COVER

  TITLE PAGE

  WELCOME

  PROLOGUE: LET’S GET HAPPY

  CHAPTER 1: THE UN-UNITED NATIONS

  CHAPTER 2: HOW TO SURVIVE HOMEROOM (AND THE REST OF THE DAY)

  CHAPTER 3: DEPRIVED

  CHAPTER 4: LOVE AND BIO

  CHAPTER 5: MRS. MORRIS, THE DOG, AND ME

  CHAPTER 6: MEET HOLDEN CAULFIELD

  CHAPTER 7: CLUBBING

  CHAPTER 8: NOTHING EVER CHANGES

  CHAPTER 9: THE CRUCIFIXION OF TEBOW

  CHAPTER 10: I DIDN’T SEE THIS COMING

  CHAPTER 11: THIS IS EMBARRASSING

  CHAPTER 12: GUESS WHO’S COMING TO DINNER. GUESS AGAIN.

  CHAPTER 13: HOLLYWOOD COMES TO NORTH PLAINS

  CHAPTER 14: THE OPPOSITE OF SPEED DATING

  CHAPTER 15: WHAT NOT TO WEAR

  CHAPTER 16: MULTITASKING

  CHAPTER 17: MAJOR FREAK-OUT

  CHAPTER 18: HERE IS WHAT HAPPENED

  CHAPTER 19: IT’S NOT SO EASY WRITING IN A DIARY IN HOMEROOM

  CHAPTER 20: THE FREAKSHOW’S OPERATION HAPPINESS: HOLIDAY EDITION

  CHAPTER 21: TRUE CONFESSIONS

  CHAPTER 22: INDEPENDENT

  CHAPTER 23: CHRISTMAS MORNING

  CHAPTER 24: LIFE GOES ON. AND ON.

  CHAPTER 25: GET BACK TO WORK

  CHAPTER 26: SHOCK TREATMENT

  CHAPTER 27: OPEN A CRACK

  CHAPTER 28: I STILL DON’T WAKE UP

  CHAPTER 29: GOOD-BYE TO THE SWEETEST PERSON I KNOW

  CHAPTER 30: KNOCK, KNOCK

  CHAPTER 31: ENTER MARJORIE

  CHAPTER 32: RETURN TO THE BLACK LAGOON

  CHAPTER 33: MY BAD (AGAIN)

  CHAPTER 34: HEY, CUCKOO CLARKE!

  CHAPTER 35: MORE “PROGRESS”

  CHAPTER 36: THE MIGHTY QUINN

  CHAPTER 37: FIRE IN THE HOLE!

  CHAPTER 38: SISTERS IN TEARS

  CHAPTER 39: THAT’S OUR ZITSY

  CHAPTER 40: TERROR, INC.

  CHAPTER 41: DEAR OLD MOM

  CHAPTER 42: SLEEPOVER

  CHAPTER 43: DRESSED FOR STRESS

  CHAPTER 44: SMOKIN’

  CHAPTER 45: HOW LOW CAN WE GO?

  CHAPTER 46: MY BRILLIANT IDEA

  CHAPTER 47: WE GO LOWER

  CHAPTER 48: TINY EARTHQUAKE

  CHAPTER 49: FACEBOOKED

  CHAPTER 50: SCARY STUFF

  CHAPTER 51: EVEN SCARIER STUFF

  CHAPTER 52: NIGHT FRIGHTS

  CHAPTER 53: I GUESS I’M NOT SO FINE

  CHAPTER 54: IMMOVABLE OBJECT

  CHAPTER 55: AFTER MIDNIGHT

  CHAPTER 56: BEST FRIENDS

  CHAPTER 57: SICKOS

  CHAPTER 58: SCHOOL DAZE

  CHAPTER 59: MEN IN WHITE COATS

  CHAPTER 60: ST. AUGGIE’S I AM

  CHAPTER 61: BANNED!

  CHAPTER 62: DIGGING OUT

  CHAPTER 63: SCREAM OUT

  CHAPTER 64: BEYOND OUR WILDEST DREAMS

  CHAPTER 65: SCREAMING IS THE BEST MEDICINE

  CHAPTER 66: MY NAME IS MARGARET, OR MAGGIE, IF YOU LIKE

  CHAPTER 67: BLOOM’S TURN

  CHAPTER 68: INNER CHILDREN

  CHAPTER 69: GETTING GOOGLY

  CHAPTER 70: ARE YOU READY FOR THIS?

  CHAPTER 71: BEFORE THE PROM

  CHAPTER 72: TALKING TO MRS. MORRIS

  CHAPTER 73: WINNING

  CHAPTER 74: TEBOW’S PREFERRED ENDING

  CHAPTER 75: ZITSY’S ENDING

  CHAPTER 76: BRAINZILLA, EGGY, AND FLATSO’S ENDING

  CHAPTER 77: BYE

  A NOTE TO OUR READERS

  BOOKS BY JAMES PATTERSON FOR YOUNG ADULT READERS

  A SNEAK PEEK OF CONFESSIONS OF A MURDER SUSPECT

  COPYRIGHT

  Copyright

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.

  Copyright © 2014 by James Patterson

  Illustrations by Keino

  Excerpt from Confessions of a Murder Suspect copyright © 2012 by James Patterson

  Cover art by Keino

  Cover design by Liz Casal

  Cover © 2014 Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading, and electronic sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher is unlawful piracy and theft of the author’s intellectual property. If you would like to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), prior written permission must be obtained by contacting the publisher at permissions@hbgusa.com. Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.

  Little, Brown and Company

  Hachette Book Group

  237 Park Avenue, New York, NY 10017

  lb-teens.com

  Little, Brown and Company is a division of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  The Little, Brown name and logo are trademarks of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  The publisher is not responsible for websites (or their content) that are not owned by the publisher.

  First ebook edition: July 2014

  ISBN 978-0-316-20763-8

  E3

 

 

 


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