Falling Deeper (Falling Series)

by Lucia Grace

  No.

  Right into me.

  Into my heart, into my soul.

  “I love you,” he says softly, gently, as if he doesn’t want to break this moment. “You know that, right? That I love you. Fiercely. Completely. That I’m in love with you. With every part of you.”

  “I know,” I reply just as softly. “I love you, too, Kayson. I’m in love with you, too. Every part of you with every part of me.”

  He offers me a timid smile before leaning forward and placing the barest of kisses against my parted lips. He leans away.

  He still hasn’t answered me.

  He lifts his arms carefully and frames my face in his big hands. Holding me as if I’m the injured one.

  “It’s you, baby. It’s always been you.”

  I’m so confused because still he won’t answer me.

  But then, exhaling a deep breath, he lets go of my face and lowers his hands to my hips to gently push me back from between his legs. Once I’m moved back a few steps he gingerly slides himself from the side of the hospital bed and gets down on one knee.

  Oh my God.

  He takes a deep breath and releases it. Then looks up at me. Nervous gray eyes stare back at my tear-filled brown ones.

  “It was you when I was seventeen and making love to you for the first time. It was you four years ago when I let my demons consume me and tear us apart. And it was still you when I woke up after almost letting those demons take me from this world two years ago.”

  I slam my eyes shut when that terrible memory and those years apart start to ruin this beautiful moment. A large, warm hand on my wet cheek has me opening my eyes again. I didn’t even realize the tears I was fighting back were falling down my cheeks.

  “It was you for the last two years when I was getting clean and making myself into a more worthy man for you. It was you that day three months ago when I walked into that hospital room and back into your life. For good. And it’s you today, standing here in front of me. It’s you, Ember, it’s always been you. Every day I’ve known you. Whether together or apart.”

  I’m trembling so hard my hands are shaking. I’m struggling to keep it together because oh my God these words. They are everything I’ve ever wanted to hear.

  “I can’t imagine spending another minute, hell, another second, without you. By my side, in my bed, in my life. Everywhere for everything. I need and want and crave you just as fiercely today as I did all those years ago, and I know it will be just as strong many years down the road.”

  I hiccup through a sob as he brings his hands back to my face and uses his thumbs to wipe away my falling tears.

  “I know this may seem sudden or too soon. But I can’t fucking wait anymore. You are my love, my life, my everything, and there isn’t anyone I want to share this life with, make more babies with, and grow old with than you, baby. Just you. Let me make you feel my love for the rest of my life. Ember, will you make me the luckiest son of a bitch alive and become my wife?”

  With that he pulls his hands away, then pulls a small black box from his pants pocket and opens the lid.

  I gasp as the diamond comes into view. A simple, vintage one-carat emerald-shaped, cushion-cut diamond, set in a halo of pavé diamonds shines up at me. But nothing shines brighter than his smile and the tears glazing over his eyes.

  When I just keep staring, Kayson starts to look nervous and I snap out of my reverie.

  “Oh my God, are you serious?” The tears won’t stop, but neither will my smile.

  “Very, baby. Marry me,” he demands as he slides the perfectly fitted band onto my left ring finger.

  “You’re demanding I marry you now?” I quirk a brow and giggle through my tears at his caveman ways.

  “Well, asking you didn’t work the first time. Now I’m telling you.” He looks directly into my eyes as he still kneels on the floor. “You’re mine. You always have been, baby. Always. So marry me. Let’s keep falling deeper. Together. Just like we have been since day one.”

  And with that final statement I fall to the floor right into the open arms of the only man I’ve ever loved. Giving him a resounding yes without using any words at all.

  CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

  -August-

  EMBER

  I catch sight of the brilliant engagement ring adorning my left ring finger in the mirror as I run my hands up the bodice of my dress. I still can’t believe it. I still can’t believe that Kayson and I are engaged and planning a wedding. I can’t believe how far we’ve come.

  A small smile lifts my lips when I think back to that day in the hospital room, after he proposed, when he wanted to drag me to the courthouse to get married right then. Stab wound be damned.

  I looked into Kayson’s deep gray eyes, kissed him silly, then told him how Momma would have his ass if he didn’t let her plan even a small wedding. He relented, but under the condition that we’d marry before the end of the summer, which gave us less than two months. I told him he was crazy, he told me he was just crazy about me, but Momma said it could be done.

  And it is.

  Because right now I’m at my last dress fitting and in just two days will become Mrs. Kayson Williams.

  I really can’t believe it.

  I’m brought out of my thoughts when Momma’s voice breaks through the small space of the dressing room. “You look absolutely breathtaking, sweetie,” she rasps out between her hands that are covering her mouth. Her eyes holding nothing but love and awe as they fill with tears.

  I sniffle back my own and release the breath I was holding as I look myself over again in the mirror in front of me. My eyes catch hers in the reflection again before I reply. “Thanks, Momma.” My tone is barely above a whisper, as I choke back on the emotion clogging the air surrounding us in the small space.

  “I’m so proud of you, Ember. So proud.” I spin away from the mirror to face Momma directly at the hitch in her voice. The tears she was holding back moments ago now cascading down her cheeks.

  “You have been through so much in your almost twenty-one years. So much.”

  “Momma—”

  “No, baby girl, just let me say this. Please.” She uses the tissue I didn’t notice she had clutched in her hand, to wipe her tears before she continues.

  “I always knew you and Kayson were meant for each other. I saw the spark in your eyes from the first time you spoke his name. Then I watched you fall. Not only head over heels for that boy, but I watched you fall into his darkness as well. How all of his hurts and pains consumed you just as they consumed him.”

  She sniffles back more of her tears and takes a deep breath before she continues. “I tried to be there for you. I tried to guide you through it all while letting you live your life. But I often wonder if I made a mistake, if I was wrong to not stand my ground more, if I was somehow to blame for what—”

  I cut her off instantly. “No, Momma. Never blame yourself.” I grasp her hand tightly in mine. “No matter what, back then I would have followed him through hell and back. It wouldn’t have done any good whether you tried to stop me or not.”

  “I know that now, I really do, but it doesn’t stop me from wondering if I could have done more to help shelter you from all that pain.”

  I shake my head at her because I know in my heart of hearts that no matter what, nothing could change my past.

  “But then you suffered not only the loss of Kayson, but also the greatest tragedy you’ll ever know. The loss of your child.” She offers a small, sad smile through her tears and mine finally fall at the mention of losing my sweet little boy.

  “But after everything. After suffering your first broken heart. After drowning in the grief of losing KJ. You survived, sweetheart. You survived and persevered and grew into such a beautifully strong woman that I am completely in awe of you. For your courage, for your strength, and for your outlook on life despite it all.”

  Momma embraces me in her comforting arms as everything comes crashing over me. The pain, the grief
, and then the love. Because after all is said and done, the love has always been there.

  When she pulls back she wipes the tears from my cheeks, then places a kiss to each one. “And now look at you. Planning for your happily ever after.”

  Her smile is radiant now and so is mine.

  My happily ever after.

  “Are you almost done in there or what, Em? I’m about to bust down that door Rambo-style if you don’t come out here.” Sam breaks into the moment, causing Momma and me to chuckle.

  “We better get out there so we don’t owe the bridal salon a new door.” Momma winks as she whispers before opening the door to let us out. Knowing damn well how serious Sam is.

  When I step out of the dressing room into the expansive bridal boutique, I gasp out loud as I take in my three very best friends in their bridesmaid dresses. Matching pale pink, strapless chiffon dresses hitting them at the knees with a sweetheart neckline exposing just enough skin. The color complimenting each of their skin tones. The style complimenting each of their figures. They all look absolutely stunning.

  Sam, Amber, and Tracey are all huddled together, right outside the dressing room door awaiting my appearance. They all stand there, hand in hand, as tears fill their eyes at seeing me in my wedding dress.

  As soon as I put it on last month I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, this was the one. The dress I’d be wearing the day I say I do to the love of my life. It’s as white as snow, with a sweetheart neckline, and a beaded bodice that flares at the hips, which compliments my curvy figure.

  “Holy crap on a cracker,” Amber blurts out as Tracey silently lets her tears fall and Sam’s mouth opens and closes like a fish out of water. Seems I left her speechless, which never happens.

  “You look stunning and sexy as hell. Kayson is not going to know what hit him when you walk down that aisle.” Tracey finally composes herself enough to say.

  I offer up a small smile as I walk over to the small pedestal in front of the floor-to-ceiling mirror. “You really think so?”

  “Hell, yeah, we think so, babe. Have you seen yourself in this dress? Kayson is going to absolutely flip his shit when he lays eyes on you. He’s probably going to haul your ass over his shoulder when he realizes he isn’t the only one looking at you. The crazy son of bitch that he is.” Seems Sam found her voice after all, as she rattles on, not bothering to censor herself.

  I laugh at her antics.

  “What? I’m completely serious.” She actually looks affronted, until a giggle bursts free.

  “I have to agree with Sam on this one, honey. Kayson is going to go crazy, I just know it.” Momma interjects.

  Tracey and Amber nod their heads in agreement.

  “I hope so.”

  “Well, we know so.” I see Sam nod adamantly in the reflection of the mirror.

  I spin from atop the pedestal, the spotlight shining overhead, and look at the four most important women in my life. “Thank you.”

  “Oh, girl, what for?” Amber asks.

  “For everything. For always being there for me. For always believing in me. For loving me unconditionally even when I didn’t love myself. For always supporting me, no matter what. You four and all of your love and guidance through my life have led me to this moment, right here, and I couldn’t be more thankful. Because right here—this life—is where I’ve always wanted to be.”

  As soon as I get the last word out, Momma and the girls step forward and we all embrace in a group hug, full of laughs and tears and, most importantly, love.

  CHAPTER FORTY-TWO

  KAYSON

  “You nervous, dude?” Damon asks through a chuckle as he slaps a hand to my shoulder. Bastard knows damn well how nervous I am.

  I didn’t sleep for shit last night after the rehearsal dinner. I tossed and turned, missing Ember’s sweet body wrapped around me all night. Then finally at 4:00 a.m. I decided enough was e-fucking-nough and dragged Damon’s ass up with me. We sparred for a couple of hours down at the gym at the station, to kill some time. It’s now about sunset, almost time for the ceremony, and I’m fucking ready to make my girl my wife.

  I tried to demand that Ember stay with me. She told me I was damn crazy. So when that didn’t work I actually fucking begged. But she still held her ground as she threw her sass around, telling me it was tradition or some shit. But that sass of hers only served to jack my dick even harder, which in turn made it that much more difficult to let her leave with her girls last night.

  I knew this was important to her, so I let her get her way, so on a groan I kissed the hell out of her, making sure she remembered who she belonged to, slapped her ass, and sent her on her way.

  A bit extreme I know, especially considering I’m marrying her in less than fifteen minutes. But letting her go last night, spending our first night apart since we got back together, created an ache in my chest I hadn’t felt in a long damn time. Something I never want to feel again.

  So damn straight I’m fucking nervous, but only because I cannot wait to see my girl. I can only imagine what she’s going to look like dressed in white, hair and makeup done up, walking toward me, and fuck, making her mine.

  As I begin to answer Damon, the officiant walks into the room and tells us, “It’s time.”

  With a nod through a hard swallow, I look over to Damon. He nods his encouragement and I lead him out to the tent on the beach. I take my place at the altar in front of our guests and Damon stands next to me. I look over the crowd of about thirty people sitting amongst the white linen chairs and realize that what I first thought to be a small guest list seems a lot larger when you’re standing in front of it.

  I take a deep breath and try to calm my nerves and excitement as I take in everything Cassandra, Sam, Tracey, and Amber did to make this wedding everything Ember ever wanted. Small white lights hang from the canopy ceiling of the tent. Pale pink bows are tied to the end of every other row of chairs. Pink and white flower petals litter the white aisle in between. The crash of the waves on the shore sounds behind me.

  Then just outside of the tent, where Ember will be coming from, I can see the barn lit up from more white lights that Ember loves, along with the flicker of candles mixed throughout the space.

  As soon as I told her she had only a couple of months to plan, she told me she knew exactly where she wanted the ceremony and reception. Since we’re both not religious she thought the old Baker farmhouse that sits along the beach would be the perfect place. I couldn’t agree with her more. Just as the chatter amongst the crowd dies down and the soft evening music comes to an end, I swallow harshly, knowing the time is almost here.

  “Kase, man, calm down. You’ve got this. I don’t know why she chose you, but she did.” I elbow the fucker before he can continue, trying to keep it down when I really want to turn around and lay into him.

  “Dude, would you chill and let me finish?” he whispers harshly, as I see from the corner of my eye he’s rubbing his ribs where my elbow made contact.

  Serves the fucker right.

  “As I was saying. She chose you, Kase. After everything, she chose you. So calm the hell down and remember that. She chose you.”

  He’s right. She did choose me. She chose me. I don’t know what I did in this life to ever deserve her, but none of that fucking matters. Because right now, in front of all these people, I’m about to become the happiest fucking man to walk this earth.

  As soon as that thought filters through my mind, I see Sam, Tracey, and Amber line up at the opening of the tent and the music cue up as they walk one by one down the aisle.

  When Amber takes the last place behind Tracey, the guests stand and all the air gets knocked from my lungs.

  She is absolutely fucking exquisite.

  There, at the beginning of the aisle, is my girl, my entire fucking life. The setting sun casting a glow around her, making her look like the angel she is.

  Damon is right, she chose me. I need to fuck off about the rest.

  As I wa
tch my girl walk down the aisle toward me, with her mother by her side, the rest of the room fades away and all I can see is her. The sway of her hips. The radiant smile splitting her pink lips. The silent, happy tears that track down her beautiful face. I take her all in, take a deep breath, and know with all my heart that I’m right where I’m supposed to be. Marrying the love of my life and making her mine in every way.

  And with each step she takes, just like the first time I laid my eyes on her, I’m falling deeper than I ever thought possible.

  EPILOGUE

  DAMON

  I scan the reception hall; bypassing the waitress I secured to take home, and zero in on the one girl I’ll never be worthy of having. In my bed or out of it.

  Tracey is standing with Ember and Kayson at their head table. She’s talking and laughing with Ember as Kayson looks on. Never taking his eyes or hands off of his wife.

  Shit. His wife.

  I can honestly say I never thought I’d see the day when they’d finally work it all out and tie the knot. But more than anyone they deserve it, and I couldn’t be happier for them.

  I’m brought out of my thoughts as a familiar cackle of laughter rings like music through the air.

  My eyes zone in on Tracey again.

  Ember is laughing with her, but I don’t notice. All I see is Tracey, my Ace, flushed with joy and happiness. Laughing with her best friend and actually enjoying herself. Letting herself shine as bright as I know she can.

  She has her head thrown back, revealing her slender neck. Her almost waist-long, light brown hair cascades in waves down her bare back and sways as she laughs. Drawing attention to her voluptuous, round ass.

  Fuck is she beautiful.

  Kayson catches my eye and lifts his chin when he sees me starting to lose control as I watch Ace. He lays a deep kiss on Ember, causing Ace to blush at their display, before making his way over to me.

  I lean back against the bar and pick up my longneck as I watch him cross the dance floor. Squeezing past a slightly more than buzzed Sam, who’s breakdancing in the center.