On Becoming His - Lessons Learned

by Dayne, Cassandre

  “That’s my girl. One day I hope you’re comfortable enough to engage of some activity at least in front of others, but for now we’ll watch and learn. Come, sweet Jezebel. Allow me to introduce you to some of the people. There’s certainly an eclectic group here tonight,”

  He led her straight through the middle of the room as if with purpose, stopping only a few times to introduce her. There was a knowing within Luke, a calm reflection of something. Jessie could tell he was making a bee-line for a group of men languishing in an area of the room set up with arm chairs and lower level lighting, emulating a cozy bar. While the men were sitting, talking casually, the woman were either standing behind them or sitting at their feet. The closer they came the easier it was to see every woman wore a collar.

  “Shit.” The word was said under her breath but Luke caught it instantly and tugged her arm stopping their progression.

  “Jezebel. There’ll be none of that. Is there a problem?”

  Jessie swallowed hard and shook her head, fingering her neck again.

  Luke seemed to follow her gaze. “Ah, well I’ll allow you to explain or not explain why you’re not wearing a collar. It’s up to you. I can assure you these men didn’t select easily or quickly when they decided to collar their submissives.”

  The comment struck her as odd. “You know them?”

  “I know them, yes. I know of their reputations. They are considered men of means and well known for their endowments to the Black Arts and their contributions to artists who work to achieve true recognition for the art of BDSM.”

  She caught the hesitation in his voice and they way he was speaking of the three men, all very close to Luke’s age, seemed more than just a casual knowledge base. “I understand…Sir.”

  Luke seemed to catch her afterthought and raised his eyebrow, but said nothing else. “They’re fine gentlemen and I think you’ll get along with their submissives, at least I hope you do.”

  Jessie had the feeling they might be doing dinner together, or afternoon barbeques and he was well aware of the fact she got along with few women. “Yes, Sir. Whatever you say, Sir. Barbeques and pool parties.” She lifted her glass and smiled before taking a gulp. Courage wasn’t coming easily.

  Luke laughed and swatted her ass. “You’re such a tease and always willful. I should turn you over my knee right here. At least you’re full of spunk. “

  Spunk. There was a word.

  As they closed the distance the men tipped their heads and there wasn’t any doubt in her mind there was clear recognition in their eyes. Each nodded and rose to their feet, immediately drawing their attention toward her. The reverence was obvious. As well as something else she couldn’t put her finger on. The men were all gorgeous, all obviously comfortable in their skin, and very much in charge. And Jessie suspected of the entire room.

  “Well, well. To what do we owe this great honor?” The words were said with kindness. His eyes twinkled as he held out his hand.

  “Bart, good of you to include us.” Luke shook firmly, as slight smile crossing his face.

  There was a definite air of familiarity about the men and as the other two walked closer, they studied her with intense scrutiny. Jessie smiled and took a step back from Luke, unsure of the protocol. There was so much to learn, perhaps about Luke the man as well.

  “Jezebel Waters, allow me to introduce you to Bartholomew Reynolds, Jackson Michaels and Wally Tyler. They practically rule the East Coast with regards to happenings with the BDSM community,” Luke stated, his eyes flashing.

  Bartholomew was blond and his dashing blue eyes merely one of his dazzling features. Jackson was another black man, good looking in a rough and tumble kind of way. And Wally had a kind face as well as a body to die for. “Gentlemen. I’m honored to be here. I wish I could say I’ve heard all about you but Sir Luke has kept me in the dark up until now.” Jessie wasn’t certain if she heard a gasp of a chuckle coming from one of the woman, but she did see three curious looks when she called Luke sir.

  “My very willful and highly opinionated submissive I should have added after her name.” Luke groaned and slid his arm around her waist.

  “And very beautiful I might add,” Jackson said as he took her hand, bringing her fingers to his mouth.

  The greeting was very intimate, but Jessie had a feeling the men were used to certain levels that went beyond being basic acquaintances. There was a mystery as to why Luke hadn’t told her about them. Tonight wasn’t the time or the place to ask Luke anything. “Thank you.”

  “I second that” Bart said enthusiastically.

  “Good to see you, my friend.” Wally’s smile was beaming as he shook Luke’s hand. “I do hope this means we’re going to see more of you.”

  “I hope so too. We’re thinking about getting involved in the community,” Luke stated flatly.

  “About time,” Jackson added as he patted her hand and let it go.

  She glanced over at the women standing together, instantly realizing the three seemed to know each other. This was growing more curious.

  “I agree.” Luke inhaled deeply.

  Jessie knew instinctively he was very nervous and the three men seemed to notice. Where they more than just sometimes friends? For her, the answer was clear. The question was, why hide the past relationship?

  “Goodness. Where are my manners? Ladies, please.” Bart stepped back, his smile broadening. He wrapped his arm around tall, black woman, pulling her close. “This lady is Marla Winters. She’s been able to put up with me for almost five years now.”

  “Very glad you’re here, Jezebel and so good to see you, Luke. I’ve so missed you.” She held up her left hand, showing off a sparkling diamond.

  “Wow. About time you two got hitched. He’s a lucky guy,” Luke whispered as he kissed Marla on the cheek.

  Instantly Jessie’s red flags rose, flying high. He’s lying to you. No, she refused to listen to her ugly little voice. “Likewise.”

  “This is Ginger James. We’ve only been together for a few months,” Jackson said as he patted the blond on the butt.

  She rolled her eyes and gave him a look full of attitude. “Why sir, I do love your love taps.”

  The men laughed and Bart leaned closer to Luke, as if allowing only him to hear what he was about to say. “She’s just as ballsy as I suspect your sweet Jezebel can be.”

  “Great. Two of them.” Luke turned toward Jessie, a look of love in his eyes.

  “And this is my beloved Aimee. We almost lost her a couple of months ago so I’m grateful she’s here.” The look on Wally’s face was one of fear as well as adoration.

  Aimee held out her hand. “Don’t look so terrified. Not because of anything to do with the lifestyle. To cancer.

  “I’m so sorry.” Jessie instantly liked the young woman whose eyes were far too haunted for her beautiful face.

  “Well, if I check out clean in two months then I’ll have something to celebrate. Come, let’s get a refill on your wine and allow the men to talk.” Aimee took Jessie’s arm.

  Considering her glass was almost half full, Jessie figured the men wanted to talk. What in the world did they have between them? Jessie allowed a single breath to escape as she walked away, her fingers raking across his back and arm.

  Luke pulled her back, turning her until he could brush his lips across hers as he cupped her ass, squeezing.

  She shivered from his touch, the way she always did, and darted her tongue out, slipping just the tip inside. Wet and hot all over, she longed to be alone with him anywhere.

  “My little handful,” Luke breathed when he broke the hold. “Enjoy. I’ll be with you in just a few minutes.”

  “I understand.” She longed to stay with him, listen to what the men had to say to each other, but she had a feeling he was allowing her into the world of his past slowly. She best not fuck this up. When she looked back toward the bar, Aimee held out a fresh glass of wine. They were only a few feet from the men but she could tell their ton
es were hushed.

  Aimee replaced Jessie’s glass without asking and smiled toward the other two women. “First time at one of these things?”

  “That obvious?” Jessie grunted.

  “Don’t worry, honey. We’ve all been there. The lifestyle takes some getting used to,” Marla chortled.

  “And when you think you get the hang of it, the men seem to want to try something new,” Ginger added.

  Jessie nodded as she scanned the room. There were various demonstrations already going on and she could hear muffed noises of pain and pleasure wafting all across the room. There were at least two hundred or more people at the party. “I can imagine.”

  “Marla, more wine while I’m toying with our bartender friend here?” Aimee cooed as she gave the blond man a lustful look.

  “Aimee!” Ginger snapped.

  “You know Sir Wally allows her to get away with certain things. Not for me, darling. Bart is intent on having me in the middle of some scening tonight. I do think he wants to flog me. You know the rules.” Marla eased down onto the arm of the chair.

  “The rules?” Jessie asked.

  “They’re not enforced, but you shouldn’t drink much when performing. You don’t want an intoxicated Master with a whip in his hand, or a submissive who is begging for more because they can’t feel a thing. Makes for a less than stellar experience.” Aimee nodded to the bartender, dragged the tip of her nail across his cheek and grabbed her glass of white wine.

  “Well I’m not doing anything either, not after last week’s experience. More drinks for me.” Ginger moved toward the bar.

  “What happened last week?” Jessie asked. She’d read about no-no’s around alcohol consumption.

  “Let’s just say sometimes when a guest is brought in who has no clue how to wield a tawse, they can inflict more than just marks. The whole thing can get pretty ugly.” Aimee walked closer. “Don’t worry. You’ll learn everything soon enough. So you’re the new girl, eh?”

  Jessie narrowed her eyes as an edge appeared on Marla’s face and before she had a chance to open her mouth to answer, Marla shook her finger.

  “We don’t talk about the past, remember?” Marla wasn’t actually asking.

  “Fine. I understand.” Aimee sniffed and took a sip of her wine, a harsh glare remaining until she turned toward Jessie. “Why don’t I take you around, show you some of the areas of interest. You’ll at least get this from a newbie instead of old, very old pros.”

  “Oh you are going to get it for that later!” Ginger huffed.

  “In your dreams, girl.” Taking Jessie by the arm, Aimee whisked her out of the seating area. “Don’t mind me. I do tend to put my foot in my mouth at times.” Laughing, she shook her head.

  “Oh I don’t mind.” For a few seconds she was uncomfortable. What was really going on here?

  “Ask anything. I understand how difficult this can be initially. I never wanted to come to these events. They were just so…”

  “Plastic?’ Jessie blurted out.

  Aimee burst out laughing. “You’re so very much like me. Yes, plastic.”

  “So you’re new to all of this as well?” Jessie knew of course there had been another in Luke’s life, but she didn’t remember many of the details he’d told her. Maybe none.

  Nodding, Aimee led her in the direction of the first booth area. “Not quite a year. Sadly I was diagnosed right after I started enjoying the lifestyle with Wally. He’s such an amazing man. We connected right away and fell in love very quickly. I never knew I could enjoy being so involved in the BDSM community. They were tremendous supporters when I was sick.”

  “Wow. I’m so glad you’re better.”

  “Oh me too.” Her tone was reflective as stopped in front of a gleaming piece of steel. “The infamous cross. We always place this front and center because whether you’re a guest or a newbie in the BDSM environment, people recognize and long to try out the cross. I’m sure you’ve at least tasted being tied to on once or twice?”

  Jessie shuddered as she remembered the first time she’d seen one of these -- the very evening of being in Luke’s house for the first time. The night had been magical, so very revealing for both. “Yes. So you weren’t a submissive before you met Wally?”

  “Are you kidding me? I was and still am what most people call a ballbuster.” Laughing, Aimee placed her hand over her mouth, her eyes dancing with mischief.

  “Thank God I’m not the only one! Sir Luke calls me far too willful to accept total obedience.”

  “Cheers.” Aimee raised her glass, a look of pure temptress on her face. “That’s exactly what Wally said until just about a month ago. Learning to become a good submissive, extremely obedient and placing your Master’s needs in front of your own takes time. Lots of time. Trust me.”

  “I just hope I can learn.” Jessie looked over her shoulder at Luke and caught his gaze. When he smiled she shivered.

  “Is this something you want?”

  Crack! Pop!

  “Jesus!” Jessie jumped as the demonstration began.

  “Ooohh…” the girl secured to the cross moaned.

  Aimee touched Jessie’s arm. “It’s okay, Jezebel. You’ll get used to that as well.”

  “Jessie, please. I think of the very bad girl every time I hear my given name.”

  “Jessie seems to suit you, a little bit wild and a lot a bit willful?”

  Posed as a question, she couldn’t help but laugh. “That’s me and to answer your question, very much so. The more I’m involved the more I want.”

  “But?”

  “But?” Jessie heard the catch in her voice.

  Aimee walked them past the cross to another station and stopped just before they eased closer to the crowd. “But you’re at the final stage before being collared and unsure of everything, questioning the past and the future, wondering how in the hell you’re going to be able to fit both into a meshed lifestyle?”

  Jessie groaned. “You’re right about everything but the collar.” Rubbing her neck she blinked back tears. Owning up to being so wretched, enough so to have her collar removed, was more difficult than she thought would be.

  “Sir Luke took your collar away?”

  Hearing surprise in Aimee’s voice, Jessie turned to face her. “Is that unusual?”

  “Well, I’m no expert but it’s very extreme and from what I’m heard terrible for the submissive. What in the world did you do to deserve that?”

  Jessie hesitated.

  “None of my business and putting you on the spot is horrible of me. Let’s just keep going.” Aimee moved forward. “This is called fire cupping. A bit more extreme than some of the other activities, but something a lot of people seem to enjoy. Before you ask, I’ve never tried it.”

  “Not sure I could handle this.” Jessie tried to concentrate on what they were doing and somehow seeing the fire under the glass dome, burning the skin was too much. She looked away. “I constantly argue with him and I pitched a fit, one of those kind I called him just about every name in the book, threw things at him and you name it I did or said.”

  “Ouch. He could have simply caned you, perhaps taken away other privileges.”

  “Sir Luke isn’t into…well I mean he spanks but he can’t seem to…” Why was she having such difficulty finishing?

  “Mmm… All of this makes sense now. I get it.” Aimee smiled kindly.

  “What do you mean you get it? I don’t get it. How can you get it? Do you know Luke? I mean Sir Luke?”

  Aimee tipped her head to look to where they’d come from. “I’m not the one to ask, Marla is.”

  “I get the feeling this subject is off limits.”

  “Well, this is a tight knit community and I certainly don’t want to speak out of turn. From what I’ve heard about Luke from Sir Wally, he’s an incredible man with so many wonderful qualities.”

  They continued walking, moving past booth after booth. Jessie was reflective as they moved past hogtying stations
and demonstrations on the art of using a cane. The sights and sounds were intriguing but the very mystery surrounding his past held more draw. “So they’re all friend then?”

  “I think they were closer before. I know that the men you met tonight spend time together. Don’t know everything about Sir Wally’s life, however.”

  “You don’t live together?”

  Aimee grinned. “Oh heaven’s no. I don’t think I could live the lifestyle 24/7. I’m just too independent. Besides, I’m not Sir Wally’s only submissive.”

  “Really?” Jessie asked and this time she was surprised.

  “No, and I know that Marla and Sir Bart share their lives with a new submissive, a lovely young girl. Marla is actually a switch and enjoys being able to have a submissive of her own. Don’t look so shocked. There are many types of lifestyles and so many of us are polyamorous.”

  “No, I’m not shocked. I’ve read plenty and even Luke, I mean Sir Luke and I have talked about the possibility one day.”

  “But you’re still crossing the line back and forth from vanilla love to this incredible experience. Right? I can tell even giving him the reverence of adding Sir is as difficult for you as it was for me.”

  Jessie genuinely liked the girl. “You seem to know me too well. I seem to struggle every damn day. I just don’t know why.”

  “Well, when you can fall in love and simply are no longer playing, the trust and the experience grows. The shared experiences are much deeper, the pleasures heightened. Take a little bit of advice from me. Give yourself some time. This isn’t always easy and emotions and fears are hovering just below the surface. You’re going through a change in your thought processes, his needs and what those in society think as well. This isn’t easy.”

  “Excellent advice.” At least she knew she wasn’t completely insane. Society. Maybe she was more bothered by what everyone else might think.