Life, Liberty, and Pursuit

by Susan Kaye Quinn

  “Well, I don’t exactly advertise it, son. Boot camp’s hell as it is.” But his eyes were dancing, enjoying the surprise.

  “But … ” David sputtered, thinking quickly. “What about your mom? Or sisters and brothers? Come on, Clayton, there’s got to be someone you can use your privilege for, besides donating it to my Eliza crusade.”

  He’d stumbled on another Clayton tripwire, because he suddenly got serious. “My mom would be turning over in her grave if she knew I enlisted, so I don’t think I’ll be calling her. As for Jenna, well, she’s not likely to be home on a Friday night.” His face was cool, but something churned just below the surface.

  “Clayton, I’m sorry,” he said, but Clayton cut him off with a wave.

  “David, it’s fine. But now that you mention it, there is someone I’d like to call.”

  “Yeah?”

  “I don’t suppose you could give me your parents’ number? Green Bay, right?”

  “Um, yeah.” He frowned.

  “Maybe I could call up your mom, you know, just to let her know how her little boy is doing.” He was grinning again, and David gave him a disgusted look.

  “The last thing I’m going to do is let you anywhere near the women in my family,” he said, seriously meaning it.

  “Oh, now you’ve hurt my feelings.” He grinned wider and feigned a heartbreak, hand over his chest. David couldn’t help laughing. Boot camp would be a lot less tolerable without Clayton. He was easy to talk to, friendly and charming—and as tight as a clam when it came to the contents inside.

  David went to sleep that night wondering what Eliza had thought of his letters. His elation hadn’t faded since receiving her letters, but worry gnawed at him. Maybe she changed her mind. He wasn’t sure if his apologies would meet their mark and convince her to wait for him. He didn’t know how long that wait would be, and he couldn’t make any promises. Except that he would love her—as if he had a choice about that. He wasn’t sure when he drifted off, but it was long after the lights went out …

  Eliza was on a beach again, only this white sand beach was in the Bahamas. She was wearing her blue bikini and nothing else. His heart lurched as she stepped out of the surf, which gently lapped at her legs. The water wet her skin and made it taut with goose bumps as the wind blew over her. As she reached him, his breath came in small gasps. For some reason, he was fully dressed in his summer uniform, and her bare skin pressed against the crisp fabric. He could hardly contain his passion for her, wrapping his hand in her hair and kissing her fervently on her lips, her neck. There was no reason to stop, they had all the time in the world …

  His body was on high alert as the alarm sounded, and he realized he must have been nearly awake when it went off. Clayton and he were off their bunks, running through the drill as the RDC barked his orders. He barely noticed Clayton’s sideways snicker as they finished making their racks.

  “Sleep well?” Clayton asked in a whisper, just out of the chief’s hearing. David couldn’t decide which was more annoying—his inability to keep quiet at night or Clayton’s determination to tease him about it. If he was lucky, he would be teamed up with Clayton during first aid training today and could ensure Clayton got payback as injured party.

  Today’s physical training was particularly brutal. They were put through their paces in the damp heat on an outdoor confidence course that simulated the top deck of an aircraft carrier. Most of the recruits that would wash out had already done so—they didn’t lose anyone that afternoon, but they were all drenched with sweat and weary to the bone. He had a couple of rope burns on his hands from handling lines and tying knots. Even Clayton seemed to be taken down a notch from his usual cool and collected self.

  Their RDC must have thought it fantastically funny to send them straight to classroom training without showers. Petty Officer Reynolds surely didn’t appreciate a room filled with fully baked recruits, but she kept him more awake than usual with coursework on naval history and shipboard communications. Clayton seemed as bored as always, and David realized he probably knew all there was to know, being a Navy brat. The rest of the day passed quickly.

  He was anxious for mail call tonight. He was ready when Recruit Petty Officer Simpson, who had reacquired his uniform, called his name during mail call. He snatched the letter from him before he could toss it across the bunks. Cream colored envelope, delicate handwriting—this one was definitely from Eliza. He answered Clayton’s unspoken question with a nod. Clayton hopped up to his top bunk, finding a sudden fascination in staring at the ceiling.

  Dear David,

  Your letter arrived just in time. I was having a hard time today, and you rescued me, as you seem to keep doing over and over. I miss you more than you can imagine.

  Your apologies are so silly, and if you were here I would tease you endlessly about them. Let me just say that I will forgive you for anything, as long as you continue to send me letters like the last one. Your words have an effect on me that is difficult for me to describe. Painfully wonderful? Achingly soothing? I wish you were here. I would show you what I mean.

  There is no one that could ever make me feel the way you do.

  Love,

  Eliza

  He didn’t know what effect his words had on Eliza, but the effect of hers was going to drive him insane with longing. But at least he knew: she still loved him and she would wait, for now. He would write letters as often as she wished if it would keep him in her thoughts. He re-read the letter and realized that something caused her pain. What had happened? If someone had hurt her and he wasn’t there to stop it … a hot flame of anger flew up inside him and caught him by surprise. But, no, she said she had a “hard time.” That could be anything. He had to ask her about it on Friday.

  Clayton somehow sensed his abrupt change in mood.

  “Everything okay on the home front?” He hung his head off the edge.

  “Yeah,” David said. “I just wish I was there.”

  “You’ve got my time slot on Friday. Use it wisely.” He smiled, and David decided Clayton was okay after all.

  * * *

  She skated through the week on the leftover high from David’s second letter. Camp continued to be enjoyable, but Eliza missed Lily—she wasn’t in camp this week. Eliza hadn’t heard from Nicolas since he walked out her door, and Addison had stopped coming over, probably busy keeping an eye on him. Eliza was glad Nicolas had Addison, especially since Eliza had taken the prize for Worst Friend Ever.

  Another letter from David came yesterday, a short one saying he would call her tonight. She was tremendously excited, but also terrified. What would she say? She couldn’t say those things she had written in the letters—it was one thing to write something down, and entirely another to say it out loud. Mostly she wanted to hear his voice again. She wanted to know he was okay. Did they treat him badly in boot camp?

  She was in actuality waiting by the phone. He said he would call between nine and ten o’clock. He didn’t know the exact time because he had to wait his turn at the phone bank. At 9:10, the phone rang, making her jump even though she was expecting it. She didn’t recognize the caller ID, but what would it say? Military facility calling? She turned the phone on.

  “Hello?”

  “Eliza?” It was him and his sweet voice with the slight Polish accent that made her heart skip.

  “David,” she breathed out.

  He sighed. “It’s really good to hear your voice.”

  “I miss you,” she said, without thinking. Suddenly there was a lump in her throat.

  “You have no idea how much I miss you.” He sounded like he wanted to reach through the phone and touch her. She was unable to say anything, and there was an awkward silence. “Eliza, are you okay?” Worry had changed his voice, dropping it lower.

  “Yeah,” she said, finally finding her voice.


  “You said something in your letter, about having a hard time,” he said. She did? Oh, that.

  “That was before I got your letter,” she said. “I really like your letters.”

  “Yours make me crazy,” he said. She could almost hear him smile through the phone.

  “Crazy in a good way?”

  “Crazy in the best way.” He laughed, and she felt her anxiety melt away. “But I do want to know. What was making you have a hard time? Was it just that I hadn’t written you?” He seemed worried again.

  “No, I, um,” she hesitated, wondering how much to tell him about Nicolas.

  “Eliza, please don’t,” he begged.

  “Don’t what?”

  “Don’t hold back. Don’t keep things from me.” His voice was soft and whispery, and her heart almost broke from wanting him.

  “Okay. But it might not be what you want to hear.”

  “I want to hear it.” He seemed to be steeling himself.

  She didn’t want him to think it was anything that dramatic, so she spoke quickly. “I told Nicolas about you, and he didn’t take it very well. He’s pretty upset and not really talking to me right now.” She waited to see what he thought of this.

  “Oh.” He seemed relieved, almost happy. Then he added, more seriously, “I’m sorry your friend is hurting.”

  “Addison thinks he’ll get over it, but I’m not so sure.” She didn’t really want to talk about Nicolas—she wanted to talk about him. “Anyway, how is boot camp going?”

  “It’s complete hell most of the time, but I think I’ll survive.” He didn’t sound like he was suffering, and his laugh resonated in her heart, making it sing. She forgot to say anything. “I’m joking, Eliza,” he added.

  “I really like hearing you laugh,” she blurted out again, wondering what happened to her internal dialogue filter. What made her spill her secrets to him without a second thought?

  She heard him take a sharp breath in. “I wish you wouldn’t say things like that when you’re over a thousand miles away.”

  “Thirteen hundred and seventy one. I looked it up.” She was rewarded with a genuine laugh that time, making her smile ear to ear. God, it was killing her to have him so far away. “Are you really okay?” she added, more seriously. “I need to know. I can’t tell from your letters.” She had lost her voice again, on an emotional seesaw in this phone call.

  “Other than missing you, I’m fine. Besides, I’ve got Clayton here to keep an eye on me.” She could hear him smiling again.

  “He’s your bunkmate?”

  “He’s great. Which reminds me, he’s going to call you back here in a minute. My time’s almost up, and he’s going to let me use his phone privilege time. So, just be prepared, okay?”

  “Prepared for what?” she asked.

  “Prepared for Clayton. Whatever he says, just completely disregard it, okay?” She could hear he was joking, but only by half.

  “Um, okay.”

  “All right. I’m going to go now, but I’ll talk to you in a minute, as soon as Clayton can call you.”

  “Okay.”

  “Bye, Eliza.” He seemed like he didn’t want to say the words, even though it was only for a minute.

  “Bye.” The phone clicked dead, and she turned it off. She thought furiously about what she had forgotten to ask, what she needed to know. It was an excruciatingly long two minutes before the phone rang and made her jump again. She turned it on.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey there, Eliza, it’s Clayton,” a honeyed southern accent drawled through her phone.

  She smiled. “Hi, Clayton.”

  “It’s nice to meet you, little lady. I’ve heard a lot about you.” He seemed to think that was funnier than it should be. She wasn’t sure what to make of that.

  “Well, I appreciate you looking out for David. Are you guys really doing okay there?”

  His voice gentled instantly. “He’s fine, Eliza. Other than pining away for you, of course.” A little louder, he added, “Whatever you’re writing in those letters, just keep them coming. He lives for those things.” He seemed to be hurrying up. “Well, here’s lover boy, now. Bye, Eliza.”

  “Bye, Clayton.” She was trying to rein in her laughter before David got back on the line.

  “Please tell me you didn’t listen to a thing he said.” David sounded a bit flustered.

  “What? Did he say something?” She could almost hear him groan.

  “I swear, I don’t know whether to kill Clayton or thank him. What do you think?”

  “I’d stick with thanking him. Besides, I need him around to keep an eye on you for me.” He laughed again, and she loved the sound of it. They talked easily some more, about her camp and his, about the heat and the summer sun, and suddenly their time was over. It didn’t seem possible fifteen minutes had gone by.

  “I have to go now.” His voice was heavy.

  “Will you call me again?” she asked, hoping that didn’t sound too desperate.

  “Don’t you like my letters?”

  “I’m in love with your letters,” she said. “But … I … ”

  “I’ll call you next Friday,” he said very softly.

  “Okay,” she breathed out, relieved. There was a pause for a moment, neither of them quite knowing how to end the call.

  “I love you, Eliza.” His voice was so soft she could barely hear it. But she did, and it took her breath away.

  “I love you, too,” she managed to get out around the lump in her throat.

  “I’ll talk to you soon.” There was a soft but determined promise in his voice.

  “Bye.”

  The line went dead, and her heart sank with it. She turned off the phone and leaned back on the couch, staring up at ceiling. This long distance love affair was going to tear her apart.

  Chapter 16

  Friends

  Five weeks into boot camp, more than halfway through, and David’s muscles finally didn’t ache every time he got out of bed. He passed the PT test and avoided the “individual” training that some unluckier recruits were enduring. Their dress uniforms arrived last week, causing him to flash back to his waking dream with Eliza. She wrote him letters nearly every day, making boot camp remarkably tolerable.

  She wrote that she enjoyed working with the campers, and that her friend Nicolas still wasn’t talking to her. Reading that gave him a thrill of guilty pleasure—he knew she missed him, but he wouldn’t lose sleep over Nicolas keeping his distance. It was far better than Nicolas trying to win her over in David’s absence.

  The letters were a slow, tortured way to communicate, but it gave them the luxury of time to discuss things. They avoided writing about the future, by unspoken mutual agreement. It was too difficult, with years of separation stretching in front of them like a barren desert with no end. Instead, they used their letters to learn about each other, explore in a way they were denied in their short time on the boat. Their phone calls, on the other hand, were so brief it felt like being robbed every time he had to hang up. Still, he was hungry for his phone privilege tonight. If he was really lucky, he would have a letter at mail call as well.

  “Look alive, recruit,” Clayton whispered next to him, drawing him out of his daydreaming and back to attention right before the chief passed. They had weapons training today, their first time on the firing range with M-9 pistols, and the chief was giving them a pep talk of sorts.

  “You will not be firing live rounds today,” Chief McMillan shouted as he passed. “You will be using a laser firing system, after which, if you prove yourself capable of not shooting your own damn foot, we might consider giving you a real weapon.” This gathered a few snickers from some of the recruits, which was followed by extra pushups. He was sure the RDCs were more concerned
about getting “accidentally” shot than they were about recruits shooting themselves. Having not handled a gun before, this was fine by him, but Clayton seemed disgusted with the idea of using a simulator. David could tell just by looking at him. Five weeks of constant time together, and he was finally able to read Clayton—not as well as Clayton read him, but at least it leveled the playing field a little.

  “Where’s the fun, if there’s no chance of actually shooting anyone?” David asked in the same whispered voice, earning a sideways grin from Clayton, who still had his eyes locked forward on the chief. His hair had grown out enough to shake slightly with his muffled laughter.

  The simulator felt like a computer game, although the weapon was real. In spite of shooting lasers rather than bullets, the pressurized gas canister gave it realistic recoil action. Still, David had a feeling firing a real gun would be a wholly different experience. Clayton was a fine shot, but then he didn’t expect any less. David didn’t embarrass himself too badly—all that time playing Halo 3 with Tomasz paid off.

  Only a few more hours until phone time with Eliza. Next week, he would have to call his mom or she wouldn’t forgive him. He had been buying time with letters, but Tea had warned him, and he knew better than to ignore a warning from his baby sister.

  He took careful aim for his last shot …

  * * *

  The last two weeks were a haze of daily life punctuated by thrilling moments when Eliza received a letter from David. She had a stack of them in her room, and they kept coming, nearly every day. She was so addicted to them that it was a difficult day when she arrived home to an empty mailbox. Sundays were simply purgatory.

  The things he wrote seemed designed to go straight to her heart. Her favorite parts were when he shared something new, sending a piece of himself through the mail. Last night’s letter was rich with those small treasures. Of course, she had memorized it by the end of the evening.

  Dear Eliza,

  I laughed out loud at the last letter you sent, with your story about your mom, the priest, and the gray potatoes. Clayton thought I had lost my mind, so I shared it with him. I hope you don’t mind.