Swansea Summer

by Catrin Collier

  ‘Can’t you see those were no accidental meetings, Lily?’ Martin interrupted. ‘And now, he broke in on us, he attacked you …’

  ‘And I should have seen it coming,’ she insisted, taking a share of the blame. ‘When we were together Joe spent most of his time either making up fairy stories, that with hindsight I think he half believed, or planning out the perfect future for us. Now, I think that he lived more in that story-book world than reality.’

  ‘Did he still talk about your future together after you gave him back his ring?’ He leaned against the wall of the house.

  ‘He occasionally mentioned his plans but it was always in a “remember this” kind of way and I never thought for one minute that he was waiting for it to happen. When we were about to get engaged, he said he would buy a cottage for us near Llandaff where he was going to work. It was going to have a big garden, roses round the door, leaded-glass windows, something like a cross between Goldilocks and the Three Bears’ cottage and Little Red Riding Hood’s, and to me just as fanciful. Inside it was going to be furnished like a palace. He talked about blue and silver, and gold and green colour schemes. He even planned a honeymoon in France.’ Shading her eyes against the sun, she tried to read the expression on Martin’s face. ‘Looking back, even in the beginning when he showed me the engagement ring he’d bought, I think I sensed that something was wrong but I had nothing to compare Joe and me with except your brother and Helen, and I knew from something Helen had let slip that she had made love to Jack. Judy joked about Brian pulling off her bra every time they were alone and all Joe wanted to do was kiss me goodnight and hold hands.’

  ‘And that wasn’t enough for you.’ His eyes were dark, enigmatic and she wished she could read his thoughts.

  ‘It was enough for me with Joe. But I didn’t look or think further than our engagement and that never really happened.’

  ‘So even when you were almost engaged to Joe you thought that some day there’d be someone else for you.’

  ‘It wasn’t as definite as that. I was living day to day. I’d just lost Auntie Norah, Joe was safe, steady, undemanding, a bit like an older brother, I suppose, although I’ve never had one so I don’t know what that’s like. When my mother turned up at the party and Joe walked away from me I was upset, but looking back, only because of my mother. I think even then I was relieved that it was over between us because he wasn’t the right one for me.’

  ‘And I am?’

  She knelt in front of him. ‘I need you to know that you’re not only the first man I’ve made love to, but the first man I’ve really loved.’

  He kissed her. ‘Perhaps I should talk to your uncle about what happened.’

  She threw her arms round his waist. ‘With Joe or what Joe saw us doing?’

  ‘Better we tell your uncle everything than he find out from Joe.’

  ‘Uncle Roy has enough to worry about, planning his wedding. Besides, I don’t think Joe will tell anyone what happened because he’d have to admit he’s a Peeping Tom. Creeping in on us …’

  ‘I was a fool not to lock the front door.’

  ‘Helen may have given him a key, so it wouldn’t have made any difference.’

  ‘We might have heard it turning in the lock.’

  ‘And we might not have,’ she countered. ‘It happened, Marty. All we can do now is try to forget it.’

  ‘I can’t forget that he hurt you.’

  ‘Thanks to you, not for long.’ She looked into his eyes. ‘And as for what happened before Joe walked in, I never want to forget that as long as I live.’ She reached for his hand. ‘The girls won’t be in for another couple of hours.’

  ‘And?’

  ‘The sun’s getting too hot to lie out here any longer.’

  ‘I love you, Lily Sullivan.’

  ‘I know,’ she whispered as she pulled him to his feet.

  Joe walked out to meet Richard Thomas as he parked his car in the drive of the house in Langland.

  ‘You said it was urgent.’ Richard climbed out of the driver’s seat.

  ‘It is.’

  ‘I assume it’s something to do with the house.’

  ‘No.’

  ‘I don’t work on Saturdays.’

  ‘You of all people, Mr Thomas, should know that I have sufficient money to pay your fees.’

  ‘No amount of money buys my services on a Saturday, Joseph.’ Richard opened his car door.

  ‘I only need five minutes.’

  Richard glanced at his watch. ‘And that is all you have. I’m on my way to a golf match.’

  ‘Are you my father?’ Joe held Richard’s glare for what seemed like hours, although it could only have been a minute or two, and he was the first to turn his head away.

  ‘If you ever ask me that question again, I will sue you to the point where you won’t be able to afford the services of a shoeshine boy, let alone a solicitor.’

  ‘Then you deny it.’ Forgetting his resolve to stay calm, Joe allowed his anger to surface.

  ‘Publicly, for both our sakes, I most emphatically do.’

  Joe lowered his voice. ‘And privately?’

  Richard hesitated for a moment before answering. ‘If you are ever in trouble I will do whatever I can to help you.’

  ‘Because I am your son.’

  ‘Because your grandfather was my closest friend.’

  ‘Did you put any of your own money into the trust fund my great-aunt set up for me?’ Joe questioned harshly.

  ‘No.’

  ‘And my grandmother’s will?’

  ‘Was written exactly the way she dictated it. You can check with her doctor and vicar if you don’t believe me.’

  ‘You seduced my mother …’

  ‘Your mother is a fantasist, Joseph.’

  ‘You never slept with her?’ Joe challenged.

  Richard Thomas leaned against his car. ‘Your grandmother told me that she caught your mother sneaking boys into her bedroom before her sixteenth birthday and never the same one twice. Any boy in her set could have fathered you.’

  ‘And you? Is it possible …’

  ‘The only thing I can tell you for certain, Joseph, is that John Griffiths is not your father. And I’d appreciate it if you never mention this subject again, to me or to anyone else.’

  ‘You give me your word about my trust fund and grandmother’s will?’ Joe pressed, realising he’d get no more from Richard Thomas than he already had.

  ‘I give you my word.’ Richard looked Joe straight in the eye. He almost convinced himself as well as the boy, but then he’d had a lifetime’s experience of lying.

  ‘No.’

  ‘Please, Katie, we can’t leave you alone, not on a Saturday night,’ Lily pleaded.

  ‘I have a headache. The last thing I want to do is to go down the Pier. I want a quiet walk on the beach.’

  ‘I’ll go with you,’ Judy offered eagerly, anxious to avoid Adam Jordan.

  Katie refused Judy’s offer. ‘I’d rather be by myself and Martin’s expecting you, Lily.’

  Lily looked at Judy and Helen in exasperation. ‘All right.’ She pulled on her gloves. ‘We’ll go down the Pier but we’ll be back early.’

  ‘Please don’t, not on my account.’ Katie lifted her jacket from the hook on the back of the door and checked that her front-door key was in the pocket.

  ‘We did what we could,’ Helen said as they followed her out of the door.

  ‘I just wish …’ Lily bit her lip.

  ‘What?’ Judy asked.

  ‘That I could help her,’ Lily answered, as she slammed the door behind her.

  ‘Will you stop looking at the door every five minutes,’ Sam griped to Martin. ‘The girls said they’d be here and they will.’

  Martin paid the barmaid for the beer he’d bought for himself, Sam and Adam, and followed Sam to a table on the edge of the dance floor. He had spent the entire day with Lily, refusing to leave her until Katie, Helen and Judy had returned. But concerned
that even then Joe might come back, he had found it difficult to tear himself away.

  It had been an almost perfect day for him and, he hoped, Lily – almost, because although Lily had insisted she had recovered from Joe’s attack, his presence hung like a black cloud over the remainder of the time they had spent together. In the afternoon they had walked on the beach, but even there he had caught himself looking over his shoulder every time a car drove along the coast road to see if Joe was in it.

  ‘You and Lily have a good day?’ Adam sat down and sipped his pint.

  ‘The water was a bit cold, but the sun was warm.’

  ‘I didn’t ask about the sea.’

  ‘I know you didn’t.’

  ‘Lover boy doesn’t want to talk about his girl,’ Adam mocked.

  ‘No.’ Martin gave Adam a warning look.

  ‘Nice house Helen has there,’ Sam broke the tension. ‘And, believe it or not, the sergeant took pity on this poor rookie when he drew up the last roster and I have a whole Sunday off tomorrow. Do you fancy spending it at the beach?’

  ‘Limeslade beach?’ Adam asked.

  ‘Are there any others?’

  ‘Thirty or so on the Gower, more if you count Swansea Bay and head out Porthcawl way.’ Adam offered round his cigarettes.

  ‘We can ask the girls what they think,’ Martin suggested cautiously, not wanting Helen – or Lily – to feel they were imposing. Beyond tonight, he and Lily hadn’t made any definite plans. He would like nothing better than to spend tomorrow with her – even if the others were around – but what if she wanted to spend it with the girls and only agreed out of politeness?

  ‘It is a public beach.’ Adam lit their cigarettes before his own.

  ‘But it would be nice if we could use the house to change and make the odd cup of tea,’ Sam commented. ‘So how about it?’

  ‘Fine by me,’ Martin agreed.

  ‘Good, you’ll ask Helen, then?’

  ‘Why me?’ Martin questioned.

  ‘She’s your sister-in-law.’

  ‘And here are the lovely ladies.’ Rising to his feet, Adam pulled three chairs out from under their table. ‘Where’s Katie?’

  ‘We couldn’t persuade her to come.’ Judy took the chair furthest from Adam, leaving Helen no option but to sit next to him.

  Martin winked at Lily who was wearing a white, off-the-shoulder, gypsy-style frock that showed off her tan.

  ‘You look smart,’ Sam complimented Judy who was wearing a dress similar to Lily’s in bottle-green. ‘What would you all like to drink – Babycham?’

  ‘I’ll have an orange juice, please.’ Helen, who had dressed soberly for the Pier for the first time in her life, was wearing a navy-blue shirtwaister, trimmed with white braid round the collar, edge of the short sleeves and pockets. More suitable for the office than a dance, she had chosen it in the hope of impressing on Martin that she had no intention of flirting with anyone.

  ‘You’re late,’ Martin complained to Lily as Adam went to the bar to help Sam with the drinks. ‘There’s nothing wrong, is there?’

  ‘Only Katie point-blank refusing to come with us. She said she’s tired but she’s been using that excuse for weeks now.’

  ‘If we leave early, I’ll walk you home and try talking to her.’

  ‘It might be better left until tomorrow.’ She smiled at Sam as he handed her a Babycham and a glass.

  ‘You want to see me tomorrow?’

  ‘Not if you don’t want to,’ she teased.

  ‘Carry on like this, Lily Sullivan, and you’ll have to throw stones to keep me from your door.’

  As Sam and Adam sat down with their drinks, Martin surprised Judy by asking her to dance. She looked at Lily, but Lily only laughed.

  ‘Go ahead. I’m not his keeper.’

  ‘To what do I owe the honour?’ Judy murmured guardedly as Martin led her out on to the almost deserted floor.

  ‘When I returned to the flat this afternoon there was a letter waiting for me from Brian.’

  ‘Did he say anything in particular?’

  ‘He asked me to tell you that he’s missing you, thinking about you and he’d like to write to you.’

  ‘He has my address,’ she said shortly.

  ‘Shall I tell him that in my next letter?’

  ‘That’s up to you.’

  ‘Then I will.’

  ‘Is that all he said?’ she asked tentatively, after a few minutes’ silence.

  ‘About you.’

  ‘Is he all right?’

  ‘He complained that he’s worn out with doing double shifts, there’s more work than he can cope with and London is a big, hot, noisy, impersonal city, especially in summer.’

  ‘You’ve just reminded me of a few of the reasons why I left.’

  ‘Then you won’t be going back there?’ Martin asked.

  ‘No.’

  ‘That sounds very definite.’

  ‘It is, Martin,’ she said brusquely, ‘so don’t try to talk me out of it.’

  ‘I wasn’t, and remember I’m only the messenger.’

  The music stopped and they stood back to applaud the band. ‘Thanks for being a friend to both of us, Marty, but I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t mention Brian again.’

  ‘Even if he asks me to give you a message?’

  ‘Just tell him what I told you. If he wants to contact me, he has my address.’

  ‘Just as you have his.’

  ‘Pardon?’

  ‘If both of you sit back waiting for the other to make the first move, you could be in for a long wait,’ he advised as he walked her back to their table.

  John slipped the letter he’d written into his pocket as he went to his car. It had taken him over an hour to write a couple of lines and he wasn’t happy with the result.

  Dear Katie,

  Perhaps you could call into the office one day on your way home from work. There is something that I would like to discuss with you.

  Yours sincerely,

  John Griffiths

  It gave no indication of what he felt – or his hopes. But then he didn’t know if there was someone new in her life. And if there was – he tried to consider all the implications objectively as he drove through Mumbles but as he passed the turn to the Pier he imagined Katie sitting there with Helen and the girls, the boys around them … Sam and Adam – he realised that he had no right even to try to contact her again after bringing her so much unhappiness. If the road hadn’t been too narrow to accommodate a three-point turn he might have been tempted to drive back.

  Parking at the side of Helen’s house he walked to the front door and knocked. When no one answered he removed the letter from his pocket and looked at it for a moment.

  Finally deciding that things were best left as they were, he returned to his car, stopping when he caught sight of a solitary figure walking on the beach. He opened the door and reached for his walking stick.

  *……*……*

  ‘You haven’t asked why I danced with Judy,’ Martin murmured in Lily’s ear, as they danced to a smooch version of ‘Harbour Lights’.

  ‘If you want me to know, you’ll tell me.’

  ‘I thought all girls were curious.’

  ‘Not this one.’

  ‘Brian wrote and asked me to tell her that he was missing her.’

  ‘Really?’ She moved her head from his shoulder and looked at him.

  ‘Do you know what really happened between them after Jack’s wedding?’

  ‘I haven’t a clue,’ she answered quickly – too quickly.

  ‘You’re a terrible liar, Lily Sullivan.’

  ‘Just as well.’ She smiled. ‘You’ll always know when I’m not telling you the truth.’

  ‘Do you think it’s serious between Lily and Martin?’ Judy asked Helen as they watched them dance.

  ‘I hope so. It would be nice if one of us were happy.’

  ‘How about making me happy and having this dance with me, Judy.’ Sam hel
d out his hand as the band played the last chords of ‘Harbour Lights’ and went into another slow dance, this time ‘The Magic Touch’.

  ‘Helen.’

  She hesitated as Adam stood before her.

  ‘I was hoping you’d give me a chance to make up for the way we parted the other day. It was stupid. After all, we are friends. Jack and me and you,’ he added persuasively.

  She took his hand. ‘As long as you remember that I’m married and don’t hold me too close.’

  ‘Hello, Katie.’

  Katie looked up, instinctively checking the beach was deserted before using John’s Christian name. ‘Hello, John.’

  ‘All alone.’

  ‘The others have gone down the Pier.’

  He fell into step beside her. ‘Why didn’t you go with them?’

  She shrugged her thin shoulders.

  His heart went out to her. ‘Oh, Katie …’

  ‘I don’t want your pity,’ she snapped. ‘You don’t want me …’

  ‘I want you to be happy. I thought that if you found someone younger …’

  ‘I told you I couldn’t be happy without you.’ Moving away from him, she sat on a rock, clasped her hands round her knees and stared at the sea.

  He stood beside her. ‘I came to give you a letter.’ Taking it from his pocket, he handed it to her.

  ‘What does it say?’ The wind caught her dark hair, whipping it across her face as she looked up at him.

  ‘That I’d like to talk to you.’ He took a deep breath as he tried to decipher her features in the gathering twilight. ‘My divorce will be final in six weeks. If you’re still prepared to put up with the gossips, the pointed fingers and the people who will call both of us names and not very pleasant ones, we could get married.’

  She stared at him as if she couldn’t believe what he’d said.