How to Keep a Secret

by Sarah Morgan

  He caught it one-handed. “Thank you for proving my point. Cushions are for throwing. They’re the soft furnishing equivalent of a stress ball. And of course I remember your thong. I was the one who removed it.”

  “And now I can’t find it.” She stuffed her hand down the back of the sofa cushions. “If my mother finds that thong, my life is over.”

  “If she finds that thong it shows you have a life. A sex life. And I thought you were getting along better with your mother.”

  “I am, but I’m not at the stage where I want to discuss my sex life. Do you have a paintbrush?”

  Greg blinked. “Before I answer that I have to ask what you want to do with it. My mind is working overtime.”

  “There’s a mark on the kitchen wall where I tripped carrying that glass of wine.”

  He shook his head in disbelief. “So use a cloth to clean it off.”

  “I tried that! It stained the wall.”

  “Let me get this straight—your mother is coming to dinner and you want me to repaint the house. You don’t think you might be taking this whole thing a little too seriously? Anyway, you’re the one who does the painting in this family.”

  Jenna arranged the cushions the way she’d seen Lauren do it, but somehow her house still lacked the “put together” air that her sister seemed to achieve effortlessly. Maybe she had to accept she wasn’t a very “put together” sort of person. “When did my mother and sister last come to us for dinner?”

  “I don’t remember.” Greg shook his head as she threw another cushion onto the sofa.

  “I want the place to look good.”

  Greg sighed. “This is crazy. This is our home. Don’t you love our home?”

  “Of course.” And she did. It was theirs. A comfortable nest they’d built over the years, packed with things they’d chosen together. “But Lauren is an interior designer. She told me her house was like her showroom.”

  “You’re a first-grade teacher.” Greg picked up one of the paintings a child in her class had made for her. “Your home is your showroom, too, but we’re showing different things.”

  She snatched it from him and tucked it in with the magazines. “We don’t even have kids, and our home is covered in kids’ drawings.”

  “I like it. We could stick some of these paintings over the stain in the kitchen.”

  “Or you could paint the wall. There’s still time.”

  He pulled her against him and kissed her. “I am not painting the wall.”

  “If my mother notices it, I’m blaming you.”

  “I’ll tell her you strolled into the kitchen wearing your thong and I walked into the wall.” But his gaze was gentle. “Your mom has a lot on her mind right now. She’s confessed to her daughters that she has no money and that her marriage was miserable. I think she’s going to have more important things to think about than the state of the cushions on our sofa or a mark on the paintwork. Lauren, too.”

  “Lauren has barely answered her phone for the past few days. It keeps going to voice mail, and when she calls me back she always seems to be anxious to keep it short. She and Mack had a big fight. Lauren yelled, and was upset about that. I’m worried about her. I hope Mom’s confession didn’t tip her over the edge. It was a bit of a shock.”

  “I’m sure. You both found out your dad had affairs. That’s a lot to adjust to.”

  Jenna felt her cheeks heat. “Actually that wasn’t the part that was a shock. We already knew about that. At least, we knew about one of them.” She felt him still and then he eased her away from him.

  “What are you talking about?”

  “We knew about Dad.”

  “What? How?”

  There wasn’t much point in keeping it a secret now, was there? “Lauren and I saw him—”

  “With a woman?” He released her suddenly and dragged his hand through his hair. “When?”

  “Years ago. Mom was away. We went to the Sail Loft and he was there—with her.” And even now, so many years later, she could picture it as if it had happened the day before. The two of them had peered through the window, shocked and disbelieving.

  “Who was it?”

  “I don’t know. We didn’t see her face. Just—well, you don’t need the detail.” She didn’t want to think about the detail.

  Greg said nothing for a full minute. “How old were you?”

  “Eight.” She saw a muscle flicker in his jaw.

  “You saw your father screwing another woman when you were eight years old and you never told me?”

  “I never told anyone.”

  “I’m not anyone, Jenna.”

  “I know, and you have no idea how much I wanted to tell you, but we had to keep it a secret. We knew that if anyone found out, we wouldn’t be a family anymore. They would have split up and it would have been like Meredith.” At least, that’s what she’d believed at the time, but now she wasn’t sure. What if they’d got that part wrong?

  Greg ran his hand over his face. “This is a huge thing, Jenna.”

  “That’s why we didn’t tell Mom. We didn’t know what to do. I guess we hoped it was a one-off. Turned out it wasn’t, but we had no way of knowing that.”

  “I’m not talking about the affair. I’m talking about the fact that in all these years together, you never once mentioned it to me.”

  Her heart started to pound. Damn Lauren and her sudden revelations. “Everyone has things they don’t like to talk about, Greg.”

  “Not you. You’re an open book, or so I thought.”

  “Are you saying there isn’t a single thing in your past you haven’t told me?”

  “You were there for almost all of my past. You witnessed it firsthand.” He looked shell-shocked. “Our lives have been tangled together for as long as I can remember, which is why I don’t understand why you wouldn’t have mentioned it. I didn’t think we had secrets, and now I discover that you’ve had a massive secret for a long time.”

  Her palms grew clammy. “Please don’t make a big deal out of this.”

  “It’s a big deal, Jenna.”

  “It isn’t! It—”

  “It’s a big deal to me.” His voice had thickened. “A very big deal. You didn’t trust me enough to tell me.”

  She stared at him, helpless. A few minutes ago they’d been locked together naked and intimate and now it was like looking at a stranger. “Don’t be mad. I can’t believe you’re reacting like this. It was a million years ago. Why do you even care?”

  For once he wasn’t smiling. “Excuse me for being human.” He strode away from her to the kitchen and slammed the door.

  Jenna flinched.

  She’d never seen him like this. If they ever had a disagreement, he was rational and calm. She’d never seen him withdraw from her.

  What she’d said had upset him, she knew that, but she’d spent her life trying to forget having seen her father that day. Surely Greg could understand that?

  She opened the kitchen door tentatively. “Greg—”

  “I’m cooking.”

  Rejection: to rebuff a person.

  She bit her lip. “I could help.”

  “I don’t need help.”

  “But—” The sound of the doorbell interrupted her and Jenna wanted to scream with frustration.

  Talk about bad timing. Maybe she should have canceled on them. She could have claimed some vile sickness. But then she wouldn’t have been able to check on Lauren.

  With a last look at Greg’s rigid shoulders, she went to answer the door.

  “Something smells wonderful.” Lauren was carrying a large portfolio case. “You’re such a wonderful cook.”

  “Thanks.” Jenna was relieved that at least her sister seemed buoyant. That was one less thing to worry about. “What’s in the case?”

  “The res
ult of my light bulb moment. I’ll show you in a moment.” Lauren slipped off her coat with that elegance of movement that characterized everything she did.

  “Is it the reason you’ve been difficult to get hold of the last few days?”

  “I’ve been busy, that’s true. Where’s Greg?”

  “He’s in the kitchen.” Jenna hoped her smile didn’t look as fake as it felt. It probably wouldn’t fool her sister, but hopefully it would work for her mother.

  Nancy stepped inside after Lauren. After a moment’s hesitation she reached out and hugged Jenna, too. “It’s kind of you to invite us over, especially when you’ve been working all day.”

  Enveloped by warmth, Jenna closed her eyes, glad she hadn’t canceled the evening.

  Then she eased away and saw that her mother looked tired, defeated, and she stopped thinking about her own problems.

  She’d never seen her mother anything other than fully in control, but it was as if letting out her confession had severed a string that had been holding everything together.

  “Can I take your coat, Mom?” And now when she looked at the gray coat she realized that the reason her mother hadn’t replaced it was because she hadn’t been able to afford a new one.

  How could she have missed so much?

  She’d been upset that her mother hadn’t known the big things about her, but she hadn’t known the big things about her mother.

  Mack was hovering behind them.

  “Hi, honey. How’s it all going?”

  “Great.” She sounded unusually subdued and Jenna gave her a tight hug, surprised when Mack hugged her back, almost clinging.

  She knew her niece had been having trouble at school and Lauren had called her, racked with guilt, to tell her how she’d “lost it” with Mack a few days earlier.

  Privately Jenna had been a little relieved to hear Lauren had exploded. Her sister’s almost unnatural level of control had been starting to worry her and in her opinion Mack had been pushing boundaries a little too far.

  “Come on in. I made all your favorite things to eat.”

  “This room is looking cozy, Jenna,” her mother said, and Lauren nodded.

  “It’s so you.”

  “Messy, you mean?”

  “Comfortable.” Lauren glanced around. “A house should feel lived-in and loved. With yours I immediately want to kick off my shoes and lounge on the sofa with a book.”

  Jenna was about to reply when Greg appeared from the kitchen, his emotions carefully concealed beneath charm and warmth.

  She tried to catch his eye, but he wasn’t looking at her.

  He poured everyone a drink and after an exchange of small talk, they moved to the table.

  Jenna served the soup, along with crusty bread rolls flavored with sea salt and rosemary that she’d baked herself. All she wanted to do was be alone with Greg to talk, but there was no chance of that.

  “Did I ever tell you my book group loved your cakes?” Nancy reached for one of the rolls. “They were gone in a moment. Everyone was talking about them.”

  “I’m glad. And I forgot to mention that I bumped into Sheila. She told me you’d been to visit Kaley in hospital and given her one of your coloring books and pens. That was kind of you.”

  Nancy gave a short laugh. “I have boxes of them gathering dust.”

  Lauren picked up her spoon. “You have a lot of things gathering dust in that house, Mom.”

  “As my grandmother said, you never know when a thing might become useful. I’m not good at throwing things away.”

  Jenna had learned not to question her great-grandmother’s wisdom, particularly as she was no longer around to defend herself. She’d died before Lauren was born, leaving responsibility for the house, its contents and the entire Stewart heritage with Nancy.

  “I think you might need to learn.” Lauren put her spoon down and pulled a sheaf of papers from her bag. “Take a look.”

  Jenna was confused. “A look at what?”

  “When I was driving round the other day, I noticed one of those huge beach houses for rent. It gave me an idea,” Lauren said. “I want to know what you think.”

  Nancy raised her eyebrows. “Since when did we work at the dinner table?”

  “Since we had a family crisis. If this works out the way I hope it will, we’re going to need to use every minute of every day.” Lauren opened the file, pulled out a spreadsheet covered in numbers and slid it across the table. “I’ve talked to a few people in town and run the numbers.”

  Jenna looked at the spreadsheets and floor plans. “You’ve been busy.” She picked up the sheets closest to her. Each room in The Captain’s House was carefully mapped out by hand on graph paper. “Can’t you do this on a computer?”

  “Yes, but I prefer the old-fashioned way.”

  It must have taken hours, but that was good, wasn’t it? Finally her sister had a focus and a purpose.

  Jenna glanced at Greg, but he was silent.

  She was surprised no one had sensed the tension between them. Or maybe no one thought to look.

  Jenna took a closer look at one of the sheets of paper. “What is that long line?”

  “This is the garden room, and the line is the window.” Lauren turned the paper round. “You can see door openings, and how that’s going to work with the space.”

  Jenna had never considered how a door opened when she’d planned her decoration. “And those small squares?”

  “Side tables. This room has the best views in the house. People are going to want to sit there with drinks.”

  “People?”

  Lauren drew in a breath. “That’s the part I wanted to talk about. Look at this, Mom.” She handed the spreadsheet to her mother, but Nancy barely glanced at it.

  “I appreciate all you’re doing, but I can’t afford to keep the house, Lauren.”

  “You can if you rent.”

  Nancy looked at the paper in front of her. “How would renting help? We still wouldn’t be living in the place.”

  “But it would belong to you. You’d own it.” Lauren leaned across and circled a number. “Look at that. It’s what we could get for a long summer rental, providing we target the luxury market.”

  Jenna thought about the rattling windows and the drafts in the winter. She thought about the peeling paint and the way the downstairs bathroom coughed out water as if it were dying. She thought about the possessions her ancestors had accumulated over the years.

  “Are you sure we’d be at the luxury end? Maybe we should aim a little lower.”

  Lauren shook her head. “That wouldn’t bring in enough money. The house needs work, that’s true, but the position is unbeatable. That’s our real advantage over other properties. That and the history of the place. We need to use that history to our advantage.”

  “Just because people are interested in history,” Jenna said, “doesn’t mean they want to be living in the middle of it. Hot and cold running water is a must.”

  Nancy straightened. “Scott refitted two of the bathrooms upstairs.”

  “If you’re renting out the whole house, all the bathrooms need to work.”

  Lauren scrawled call plumber on the top of another piece of paper. “The whole house needs work, but much of it is decorative. We have ten bedrooms—”

  “Nine,” Jenna said, eyeing her mother. “Dad’s hobby room is crammed with things. Model boats, his golf clubs and all those trophies he won. No one would want to sleep in there.”

  Nancy finished her soup. “He wouldn’t ever let me in the room even to dust.”

  “It must be like something from Great Expectations,” Mack said, “covered in cobwebs.”

  It was the first thing she’d said since they’d sat down and Jenna saw Lauren give her a warm smile.

  “I bet you’re right.”

/>   Greg stood up and cleared the plates.

  Jenna watched as he disappeared into the kitchen. She desperately wanted to follow him, but she knew their problems were going to have to wait until later. “I suppose we could lock that door.”

  Lauren tapped her pen on the table. “Let’s worry about that later. We have three months to turn The Captain’s House into luxury accommodation that people will be prepared to pay good money to rent.”

  “Three months isn’t very long,” Nancy said. “Is that possible?”

  “Yes. I need to talk to the planning people and all the necessary officials to make sure we can rent the house out, but I’ve been doing some thinking and drawn up some plans—” Lauren reached down and opened the portfolio she’d been carrying. “Structurally the place is sound thanks to Scott’s work over the winter. We can’t change the space, so it’s about making sure that the decoration makes the most of it. We are going to enhance all the best things about the house, and reflect the coastal position. I’ve had some ideas.”

  She put a stack of mood boards in the middle of the table.

  “This takes me back to our childhood when you redecorated my bedroom.” Jenna picked up one of the boards. It was covered in images and fabric swatches. She immediately recognized the layout of the master bedroom suite, but not the style. “I love this. But won’t it cost a fortune?”

  “No. I intend to do all of it myself.”

  “All of it? We need new sofas in the living room.”

  “We can’t afford that. We’ll reupholster the old ones. I can do that.”

  Jenna looked at her. “You know how to upholster a sofa?”

  “I know a lot of things. I’ve just never had the chance to do them before.” Lauren handed the board across to her mother, who studied it for a moment.

  “I love this.” Nancy reached into her bag for her glasses and took a closer look. “The colors are light and fresh. You have a good eye.”

  “We’d need to refit a couple of the bedrooms. We need more closet space, maybe some bookshelves. And I have some ideas for the kitchen that shouldn’t cost a fortune. And I intend to turn one of the downstairs rooms into a media room.” Lauren picked up her phone and showed them some photos.