10th Grade
Page 2
As for me I try to be more low key I don’t think it’s important to walk around acting like you’re some big deal people should just go around being themselves and not make such a big deal out of it.
Also I think there’s nothing wrong with not having a million friends I just think people are different and you don’t always find people who are just like you right away. Especially around 7th and 8th Grade when everyone’s dividing up into their groups and clicks with their friends and everything and already when we got to Hutch Falls Freshman Year the same groups from peoples other schools were pretty much set. So if things don’t work out at 1 point they can still work out later.
Anyway the 1st thing the 1st day of school is orientation and welcome we’re divided up into 2 auditoriums because there’s too many people to fit into 1. The speakers speak in 1 auditorium then go to the other 1 and whoever was in the other 1 comes into that 1. 1 speaker is Mrs. Fammer the school psychologist who explains how to tell if your friends are about to commit suicide (1 way is if they start talking a lot about suicide). Then we get introduced to our Homeroom Instructors mine by the way is Mr. Dunne a physics teacher who teaches Physics I II III and IV. He isn’t wearing it at the assembly but he always wears a white lab coat which I don’t really get why because it’s not like chemistry nothing’s going to get on you or anything in Physics. After orientation I have World History. Then I have Math II. Tragically I have Mrs. Lippner for Math II who I had last year in Math I. She’s younger than a lot of teachers and acts cool and everything but then gives quizzes every single week and gave me a D+ last year which was my only D ever and if I just got lucky and got in the other section I’d have Mr. Planjet who likes to be called Mr. Math and who has a big Afro even though he’s white and has fun in class without tests.
After Math II I walked out into the hall. I was standing there deciding if I should go to my locker or not when she walked right past me. I was just there and then there she was going by. You may or may not believe that 1 moment can change your life. Philosophers have disagreed on this point. But I think it can and this is why I think I saw Renee and everything I believed before suddenly kind of disappeared. I know I didn’t know her at all and had never said a word to her and as far as fate maybe never was going to but still it’s true. And it wasn’t just how beautiful she was I swear you could see something in the way she walked and moved and was and looked and everything that was her unique self and different from anybody else. I almost felt a cosmic thing even though I don’t believe in that.
Of course by lunch she found John McKnight and Randy Brewer and Lenea Vovich and Cindy Tollson and all the people you know she’s going to be friends with. I’m wondering what if I went up to her before she met anyone and said “Hey! Welcome to Hutch Falls!” Maybe then fate would be different maybe you can change fate. But basically John and Randy and her would be like “Sorry but she’s OBVIOUSLY going to be our friend” and I would be like “I know”.
So the day was weird because it’s the 1st day of school anyway and then I’m thinking about her all day the word is already out that her father is some kind of businessman and they lived in Japan where he was doing business until they just came back.
Anyway Spanish is my last period class. We have Spanish in the language center which is basically a regular classroom except there’s posters all over the place of bullfighters and French wine and ruins. There’s this 1 poster with a bullfighter in this dress almost and he’s staring at this bull that’s running at him and under the picture the poster says “JUAN RAMIREZ LEGENDARY SPANISH BULLFIGHTER”. Freshman Year I spent a lot of time in Spanish looking at that.
So I go in and see Juan Ramirez and I’m looking at him for a second and then I see something purple. The new girl is just about the only purple thing around but there’s no way she’s in my Spanish class and I look up and there she is sitting down in a chair in the back of the room. I always sit in the back so no one can think anything’s weird about me sitting down behind her and 1 row over so I just sit down and I’ve got this perfect view where I can see her Breasts from the side and the way they’re making this huge almost like a hill in her kimono not to be a pervert.
The bell rings and Mr. Eller comes in he was our Spanish teacher Freshman Year too. He’s pretty young for a teacher but he used to teach at a college in New York and he’s pretty uptight he wears suits every day and Freshman Year he used to kick this 1 girl Lucy Blum out of class every single day for talking without raising her hand I’m not exaggerating or trying to be funny.
So Mr. Eller comes in and right away he says “Buenos Dias.”
“Buenos Dias” we all say at the same time.
Mr. Eller nods with contentment then he goes right up to Serena Isaacson who everyone knows is the smartest student in the class. He says “Como Estas?”
Serena waits a second then she says “Bien Gracias.”
Everybody’s relieved because now we’re sure what to say after a whole summer of no Spanish so now Mr. Eller goes up to everybody and asks “Como Estas” and everybody says “Bien Gracias” or “Muy Bien Gracias” depending on how good they are. Except for this 1 guy Robbie who Mr. Eller calls “Pepito” who says “Yo Estoy Muy Bien” but he’s so happy about saying the “Yo Estoy” part he forgets to say “Gracias” and Mr. Eller has to say “Gracias?” Then he says “Gracias.”
Then Mr. Eller gets to the new girl. He says “Como Estas?” And she says “Bien Gracias”. I’m trying to figure out how she learned Spanish in Japan and if maybe she’s some kind of language genius and then Mr. Eller says “how do you say “how are you” in Japanese?” so even the teachers basically know this hot new girl is here from Japan and from the side I can see she’s opening her mouth but not a lot and her lips get screwed up kind of and she sticks her head out and goes “hapshphshfeee” or something like that and it’s different sounding and really really beautiful. I want her to say it again just so I can hear her say it again.
Next we get divided up for dialogue drill usually you end up with whoever’s in front of you as your partner for dialogue drill but the seat behind Renee Shopmaker is empty and everything gets fucked up and Mr. Eller points to me and to her.
“You 2” he says.
Suddenly everybody’s standing up there’s no time to think and I just take my chair and take it over to her desk and sit down.
“Hi” she says.
“Hey.”
“I’m Renee.”
“Hi I’m Jeremy.”
She’s got perfume on and I can’t stop smelling it.
“Begin dialogue” Mr. Eller says.
Neither of us says anything. Then I realize that as the man and as the senior Spanish student I have to do something.
“Um Buenos Dias” I say.
I know it’s bad but I say “um” a lot sometimes when I don’t know what to say because for example I’m speaking Spanish and I don’t speak Spanish.
“Buenos Dias” she says.
There’s a very very long silence.
“Como” she says finally and then she thinks for a second and then she says “Estas?”
“Bien.” I forget for a second and then I say “Gracias.”
Then I wonder if I should impress her with a “Muy” but it’s too late.
There’s another very long pause and then I say “Como Como Estas” accidentally repeating the Como like a total idiot.
“Bien” she says right away. Then she says “Oh. Gracias.”
Then we sit there. Most of the other people in the class are finished too and we wait for Mr. Eller to announce the dialogue drill is over.
Anyway at soccer practice everyone is talking about her and I don’t say anything we all suck from having the whole summer off except for Chris Halal who went to soccer camp. We’re not in shape either and Coach Kurlyesku is pissed but finally practice ends.
After practice I rode home with Anthony Rey a senior on the Varsity who’s a pretty cool guy and who lives a couple block
s down from us when Anthony drops me off he says “Later” and I say “Later” and I picture him and Eric Loff and Ben Luzano and Terry Hogan sitting around in 1 of their basements on Friday night drinking beers and saying “Later” to each other over and over and over again. I don’t know how anybody ever actually leaves. Because they’re so busy saying it.
I go in the back like I do every day and my Mom’s in the kitchen cooking some smelly fish because that’s all we ever eat. She’s wearing a brown shirt with no sleeves that she wears a lot she looks kind of bored and when I come in she says “How was school?”
“Fine” I say.
“Do you like not being a Freshman anymore?”
This is a typical my Mom question everything’s kind of upside-down. So I have to think for a second to figure it out.
“I guess” I say.
“Did you make any new friends?” she asks.
“I don’t have time for new friends” I say.
“You should bring your friends over this year” she says.
I say “I’ve told you a million times people don’t hang out at peoples houses.”
She says “I know I know but you’re getting older and if you ever want to bring anyone over for dinner I just want you to know that’s fine people like to come over for dinner.”
“Not when all you eat is fish” I say.
“Well your father” she says and that’s all she says.
I go up to my room I don’t even take my shoes off I just lie down on my bed. I only have 1 poster up in my room and it’s my Charlies Angels poster and it’s right over my bed so I look up at it. (Back in 8th Grade when I asked my Mom if I could put it up here’s what she said:
“Who are Charlies Angels?” she said.
“They’re like detectives” I said.
“Detectives?” she said.
“On TV.”
“Who’s Charlie?”
“He’s sort of their boss.”
“Why are they called Angels?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well it’s your room do whatever you want.”
She said that but I could tell she didn’t like it but I didn’t really know what it was exactly she didn’t like. Either my putting tape on the walls or posters in general or detectives or hot women who dressed in hot clothes and jumped around and showed their Breasts off a lot? Anyway I put it up on the wall but I was afraid about what she was thinking about what I was thinking about them which I wasn’t.)
So I look up at the Angels now and I think about what they were like in High School probably like Lenea and Cindy and then they just grew up into detectives and women with Breasts like that and everything. Then I put my hands behind my head and just stared contemplating at the ceiling. I was thinking about if I was running up and down hills in Japan and it was getting dark and there were all these Samurais all over the place and they’ve got these huge horses and I’m chopping their heads off and they’re falling on the ground and rolling around. I’ve got this huge sword the kind with a curve in it and I’m getting blood all over my blue Alligator shirt which I realize is stupid so I imagine I’m in chainmail and armor except not on my face because I want to be able to see and then there’s this castle and it’s on fire and I’m climbing up these huge walls to get in and there are all these screaming ladies inside with the very white faces and they’re wearing kimonos and some of them have sushi which is Japanese raw fish and Renee’s right in the middle of them all and I grab her and get her out of there and then we go outside in the woods and Renee puts her head on my shoulder and she smells nice and she says “I’m so tired.” I make up stuff like that sometimes.
I remember Miss Lander my 3rd Grade teacher she was very skinny and she wore these skirts in 3rd Grade sometimes I used to think about her a lot and miss her on the weekend. Then I pictured myself kissing Renee Shopmaker and by the way she’s so hot nobody even notices her name which is like what is a Shopmaker? In Medieval and ancient times people from other countries have names which are indications of what they do for a living like John Carpenter who’s a carpenter or Bob Cabinetmaker but what’s a Shopmaker she makes Shops? How do you make a shop? This name could be her 1 weakness like Superman had Kryptonite and Achilles from The Odyssey has a fucked up heel but she’s so hot NOBODY EVEN NOTICES like if Lex Luthor was holding a huge hunk of Kryptonite over Superman and he was dying and then Lex suddenly said “Oh Superman you’re so great” and dropped the Kryptonite and forgot about it. Anyway I stopped thinking about kissing her. That would never happen Mrs. Lippner could probably come up with an algebra equation that proves that would never ever happen and I could smell the fish my Mom was making downstairs but even if I liked fish which I don’t I wasn’t that hungry anyway.
There was a long road ahead of me. With obstacles like Geometry. And soccer games. These are the challenges I needed to face on the night of the 1st day of school.
CHAPTER 3
I MEET GILLIAN
I’m sitting outside in the courtyard at 1 of the tables out there in the morning it rained pretty hard so it’s wet and nobody else is outside and the tables are covered with these berries that fall off the trees and mush all over everything out there. I’m wearing my soccer jacket and I figure I look like 1 of those outdoor types who just like it outside all the time. This is several weeks after the beginning of school by the way.
I’ve got this meat loaf my Mom’s wrapped up in enough tin foil to protect it from an atom bomb and I’m about 1/2 way through unwrapping it when I hear someone say “Can we sit here?” I look up and there’s this girl standing there behind her is Caroline Zisko. Who by the way I haven’t talked to at all this year she’s got on a black sweater made out of Angora that looks like it’s sort of coming apart and sticking out of itself and for some reason when you look at it all you want to do is touch it and the girl in it whoever she is (Angora is very soft). She’s really thin this year and her blond hair is about 1/2 black now she looks old her face is still really white though and she’s wearing this purple black lipstick that makes her look like some kind of mummy. And behind her there’s a guy in glasses standing. I’ve seen him but I don’t know him.
“Yeah” I say.
Sometimes when it’s really crowded people sit with people they don’t really know and then I look at my sandwich like it’s fascinating or something and try not to listen to them but there are tables everywhere now because it’s wet.
They all sit down when I say it’s OK. The 1st girl I don’t know is close to me Caroline’s next to her and the guy is around the other side. The 1st girl looks kind of flat and she’s got a lot of brown hair more than usual and it’s very curly I’m pretty sure she’s new this year and I’ve seen her around in the halls a few times during the past few weeks. In fact once or twice I think she looked at me in a funny way sort of like she knew me from somewhere or something. Anyway she opens up a carton of chocolate milk then she says “I’m Gillian.”
“I’m Jeremy” I say.
“So you know Caroline right?” she says.
“Yeah.”
“Hi Jeremy” Caroline says.
“Hey.”
“How was your summer?”
“Good how was your summer?” I said.
“Ugh don’t even ask” Caroline says shaking her head.
“That’s Douglas” Gillian says.
“Hey” I say.
He nods he’s got this kind of round face and there’s a little bit of hairy beard on it that makes him look a little like he writes poetry or needs a shave. He also looks pissed off not at me but at the world or something.
“What is that?” Gillian says pointing at my lunch which looks very gross and making a face.
“Meat loaf.”
“Oh” she said. Then she said “Isn’t that more like dinner food?”
“It was” I say. “Last night.”
Gillian laughs and Caroline laughs and I realize I made a pretty good joke.
I was thinki
ng about how it’s weird because with this group because they’re rebellious or whatever and different in their black clothes and non-participating in extra-curricular activities people might think I was sitting with them. There was a long pause and all 3 of them were staring at me especially the guy Douglas.
“I don’t eat meat” Caroline says she takes a cucumber out of a baggie and holds it up.
“Do you always bring lunch?” Gillian says.
“Yeah my Mom makes it” I say and then I feel stupid because don’t most people make their own lunch?
“My Mom can’t even make a sandwich” Gillian says.
“What do you eat?” I ask.
“We go to a restaurant called Olives a lot.”
Eating out a lot is not a good sign of family togetherness.
Caroline says “My Mom cooks but it’s all like hello do you know I’m a vegetarian?” She put a piece of celery between her 2 lips.
“What do you eat? Just vegetables?” I asked her.
“Pretty much. And fruit, and yogurt, and cereal. I like cereal for dinner Grape Nuts they’re good.”
“My Dad eats Shredded Wheat” I say.
“What is he like constipated?” Caroline asks.
“What?” I say.
“Isn’t that what people who have to go to the bathroom eat?”
“I don’t think so.”
Just then some wind came out of nowhere and knocked some rain out of the trees. Gillian had to shake her head a few times to get the water out of all her hair which she has a lot of. Douglas wiped off his sandwich. Gillian looked at me and said really seriously “So why are you eating out here?”