My heart breaks at the simplicity of love and family in a child’s mind. It’s easy to forget that she’s nine. She’s so very mature, so grown up, it’s more like being around another adult rather than with a child.
“It’s not that simple,” I tell her and she looks over at me as she climbs up on the fence to watch the mare and colt playing in the pasture.
“Isn’t it?” she asks, and we both watch the horses play.
I wonder what she means. There’s so much more that goes into love, into falling in love than just spending some time together. Besides, her father doesn’t seem like the type to fall in love. And with all he’s been through, I doubt love is something he’s even open to right now.
As we stand, Jenny’s colt wanders over to Olivia, who reaches a hand out to let him sniff. He seems interested in her and sniffs her face, nibbles on her hair, before rearing playfully up on his back legs and dashing off toward his mother.
Olivia, as if unaware I’m still here, brings her fist to her chest. “You’re a warrior, little colt,” she says softly, her eyes focused on something only she can see.
I smile at her, Kieran’s words floating back into my mind. They thought she’d die. She almost did.
That’s why they do the chest thump thing, I realize. She’s his little warrior. Because she almost didn’t make it.
I feel the sting of tears and blink them back.
* * *
When we finally head back to the house, Kieran has dinner ready, and I have the amazing feeling of coming home. It almost feels like dad is right here, sitting with us, enjoying the company.
We take our places and eat, and I finally figure out what was bothering me. Something Olivia said. I know Kieran’s plan is to sneak around, to take it easy on her and not push. That’s his way. Go easy on her, because she’s having a rough time.
“So, Olivia,” I say as I take a bite of the salad before me. Kieran had made beautiful baked chicken with rosemary and thyme, a salad with fresh tomatoes from the garden, and baked potatoes. Simple, perfect. “What did you and your mother talk about?” I ask.
Kieran tenses right up and I expect a swift kick under the table.
But Olivia chokes on her bite. “Um,” she says, taking a drink of her milk. “We talked about how I could come stay with her.”
I sense a shift in Kieran’s attitude, and know my hunch was correct. “Oh,” I agree with her. “Where is she at?”
“I can’t tell you,” Olivia says, looking miserable as she picks at her food.
“I mean,” I say, side stepping the refusal. “is she in a hotel? Apartment? House? I mean, you want to live on a ranch, is she on a ranch?”
“She didn’t really say,” Olivia says.
“Olivia,” Kieran says, his voice a warning.
She refuses to look at him, and I sense her bravado waning.
“Olivia, look at me,” Kieran demands, and she listens. Only now do I see the sparkle of tears in her eyes. “Did you talk to her?” He demands, and Olivia stares at him, her eyes red as two tears slip down her rounded cheeks.
She says nothing, but her eyes tell us everything we needed to know. “We’re going to talk later, young lady,” Kieran says, but I shake my head.
“Feel free to talk now. Having a mediator might help.” I mean it as a joke, but he glares at me.
He goes back to eating, as I take another bite. I sense he’s unable to keep contained, and I take a breath and wait for it.
“You’re grounded,” Kieran says, and I wince.
“Why did you lie, sweetie?” I ask, looking her in the eyes. Offering her silent strength, I think hard at her as if she can hear me. If you tell him, maybe he’ll understand rather than just be mad.
“I just wanted to stay here,” she says, her voice barely above a whisper.
He says nothing, but I push her. “Why?” I ask, my food all but forgotten. It’s delicious, but I’m interested in what the girl has to say. And I know Kieran is too, even if he’s ignoring us right now.
“Because you’d be a good mom,” she whispers, her blue eyes locked on mine as my heart stops dead in my chest.
Chapter 27
Kieran
I almost choke on my food. Not only have I found out my nine year old daughter has played me for a fool, but she’s wanting Emma – of all people – to play mommy.
Fuck.
How fucked up is my life right now?
What the hell is going on? Have I lost it?
When we finish our food, I tell Emma thank you, and tell Olivia to get ready to go home. Emma pulls me in for a hug, but it’s just cover for her to whisper in my ear. “Go easy on her. She needs a friend, not an angry dad.”
As she says it, I flash back to my dad finding out I’d lied to him. He’d belted me until I couldn’t walk that time. But his anger, his anger had shut me down. I felt like he never heard me, like he didn’t understand me. Like he didn’t give two shits about how I felt.
I never wanted to be him, yet here I am, grounding her rather than hearing her out. Like my dad did to me, I’m invalidating her feelings. Like an asshole.
I’m a fucking asshole.
I’ll make it right.
* * *
“I’m sorry.” The words feel weird.
Olivia looks up at me, her face alight with love. “It’s okay, daddy. We all screw up.”
I’d ungrounded her. We’d talked until three am about everything and nothing. I’d finally gotten to hear her heart, her thoughts, her fears and dreams. Things I’d felt cut off from up until now. And it was all thanks to Emma.
My phone lights up and I answer it.
“Mr. Knight,” Nikki purrs.
“Yes?” I say, wanting her to get over it.
“The tenants are out. You’re free to remodel the Birch property.” She sounds ecstatic, and I realize that I’m going to be busy.
How about my messages?” I ask, trying not to ask in a way that might clue in Olivia.
She pauses. “Oh! No, she hasn’t been calling.”
I breathe a sigh of relief. No more calls from Cami.
“Thank you, Nikki,” I tell her. Hanging up the phone, I look down at Olivia.
“Go,” she says, “I’ve got to make Sandy work for that paycheck.” An evil grin crosses her lips and I laugh.
“Be nice. I’ll be back in a while.” I give her a hug and she presses a kiss to my cheek. “I love you,” I whisper in her ear.
“I love you too,” she says.
Carefully setting her on her feet, I watch her scramble off in search of her nanny. Everything is right in the world. Well, most things are right in the world. I need to talk to Emma.
* * *
I park before the house and see Emma come out, a smile on her face. When I get out, I know she’s looking for Olivia. As she realizes I’m alone, the smile leaves her face. And I get it. Now that Olivia’s not here, she doesn’t have to play nice. She can let me have every ounce of anger she pent up before.
She stalks up on me, an angry finger pointed my direction. “You’re a terrible human being!” She shouts. “You’ve been using me all along. You’ve gone everything you can to manipulate me!” She turns and walks a quick circle, fury radiating off her.
“Kyle was right about you!” She says, but this time, the pain of the ugly words is less.
“You’re right.”
She stops, her face filling with confusion. “I’ll never sell! You’re a despicable human being!”
I step in closer to her, craving something from her. Something she’ll never forgive me for. And she shouldn’t. Pulling her into a kiss, I push past the barrier of her lips to plunder the sweetness of her mouth.
Her hands come to rest on my chest, and I wait for her to push me away. But she doesn’t. Instead, she meets me, her tongue twirling around mine as if she can soften me with her sweetness.
She can’t.
With quick hands, I pull at her shirt. But she jerks out of my grasp and tu
rns to walk toward the house, an angry, sexy sway to her hips. I follow, desperate to taste her again. At the door, she pulls me into another kiss, her teeth capturing my lower lip as she lets out a sexy little growl.
We migrate across the living room toward the stairs, her lips and teeth working mine. I grab her ass and lift her. As her legs wind around my hips, I push her back into the wall right by the stairs as she cups my face with both her hands.
I can feel the heat of her pussy through both our pants. And my cock pulses, ready for her. Her lips leave mine to tear into my shoulder before her hands pull at my shirt. It hits the floor and she’s desperate to be close again.
I hold her, bracing her against the wall as she kisses my lips, my cheek, my throat. I feel the sting of her teeth and know her anger is still red-hot. Bring it on. Her arms come around my shoulders and her teeth sink into the meat of my shoulder as I press my lips to her neck and walk up the stairs.
At the top, she reaches back and pushes open her bedroom door. When I lower her onto the bed, she bucks her hips. I let her change positions so she’s riding me. With furious fingers, she pulls her top off, and I scowl at the damn bra she’s wearing.
But it quickly lands in a heap on the shirt. And I stare up at her perfect tits. She grabs a handful of her loose hair and wraps it up in a hair tie she’d had on her wrist. When it’s up in a cute, messy bun, she glares down at me like I’m her next meal.
But I’m done letting her be in charge.
With a quick buck of my hips, I unseat her and roll her onto her back. She yelps as my hands find her wrists and I hold her captive. I jerk back as she nips at me. I hear the click of her teeth and grab both her wrists in one hand before flipping her over. With her on her belly, I press into the cleft of her ass.
She whimpers, looking at me over her shoulder.
Fuck, she feels amazing. And her fury only adds to the pleasure of it all.
Returning the favor, I sink my teeth into her shoulder, then suck the soft skin into my mouth. She whimpers again, the small sound so pathetic, I release the skin. A red spot blossoms, and she begs me not to leave marks.
“Why?” I ask, my eyes on hers as I take another spot of her skin between my lips.
Her eyes widen. But she doesn’t respond as I release her wrist. Her fists ball up the pretty lavender sheet on her bed.
“Bad girl,” I say, blowing on the damp spots on her skin. “You didn’t make your bed.”
Chapter 28
Emma
Something about Kieran calling me a bad girl is thrilling. Suddenly, he backs off and pulls me to my feet. He works my pants free and whisks them down. Remembering last time - and the damaged fragments of my favorite lace panties I had to throw away - I drop my panties as he picks me up like I weigh nothing and drops me back on the bed. There’s nothing sweet or gentle about this time.
And it’s fucking amazing.
He’s savage as he wrenches the offending clothes off me. When I’m naked before him, he takes a moment to drink me in and remove his pants before climbing on top of me. He’s powerful, all muscle and sinew.
He’s sexy, the kind of powerful that’s not honed in the gym, but perhaps from something more intense, like calisthenics.
His hands feel huge as they capture mine. Palm to palm, I surrender to his lips as he plunders my mouth and lifts my hands over my head in a helpless position that’s too sexy. I can’t even breathe, I’m just pinned under him, desperate for more, more, more. His teeth close over my lower lip and I whimper as he pulls back a bit.
Then, he’s positioned against me, the tip of him persuading my body to open for him. I tilt my hips, every bit of me hungry to feel him again. I’ve wanted this since we did it last. Every dream has been him, fucking me.
And this primal, rough side of him is so much more sexy than the sweet fantasy I’d had.
Suddenly, the world shifts and I find myself on top.
I cry out as he fills me. I want to ease off, but his hands find my hips and hold me prisoner. I look down at him, shocked at the dark fury and raw desire in his eyes. He releases me to grab the free sheet on my bed. I watch, unsure what he’s about to do as he brings it behind my ass and grabs it in both hands.
Then he pulls me forward, both arms flexing as he fills me so far I feel like I’m going to split. It’s painful, but so damn amazing at the same time, I’m conflicted.
“Hold on,” he growls, nudging his chin at the heavy wooden headboard at the top of my bed. I grab it, aware it puts my chest on display, but helps me balance so much better. Then, he’s moving me. The sheet holds my ass prisoner and he’s merciless as he hauls me forward and lets me rock back.
But the sensations! The pressure on my clit is unbearable and shoves me headlong toward orgasm, while my body adjusts to how deep he is, how hard, how unforgiving. There’s nothing sweet about this. This isn’t lovemaking. This is raw, angry sex, and it’s fucking amazing.
His whole body works like a rower as he moves me and I just hold on, glad for the support. Every pull makes my tits bounce, and I see him smile a small, cruel smile as he studies me.
Everything works in tandem as he forces my body to act as he wants it. And I watch him, startled by all of it. It feels too good. It’s too rough. He’s such a bastard.
“Don’t stop,” I whisper, feeling my body creeping closer to the brink of orgasm. Why had I ever thought that sweet and gentle was sexy? Why had I never considered angry fucking to be the hottest thing ever?
“You’re going to come,” he growls, his intense ice blue eyes raging like fire as he captures me in his stare. The challenge is enough to balance me somewhere between wanting to do as he says and not doing so just to spite him.
But screw spiting him, I’m going to enjoy this. Every last pulsing, wet, incredible second of it. And that means an orgasm. One more intense than any masturbation session has brought me. Something more breathtaking and earth-shattering than I’ve ever reached myself.
“Emma,” He says, bringing me back to him, to this moment he’s creating in my heart and soul, “I need you to come, now.”
And, as if my body was simply waiting for this order from him, everything comes together and explodes outward in an impossible exposition of pleasure. The clenching of my core aches throughout my whole being and the way my body shudders is beyond my control.
And through it, he’s watching me, his face tightly controlled as my world falls to pieces and washes away in waves of destruction. But it’s beautiful. He seems to swell in me as the pulsing of my pussy clamps down on him, holding him tightly, embracing him like I’m both trying to expel him and hold him hostage.
How has he managed to have such an impact on my life? Why am I here, riding the incredible cock of a man who has done everything in his power to destroy my life? And why is it so devastatingly amazing?
As the pleasure begins to fade to a warmth that’s soothing and begs me to rest, he gathers me into his chest and holds me tightly.
And I can’t help myself. “Don’t worry, I’m still clean,” I murmur as his arms lock around me.
“And still on the pill?” he says. I lift my head from where I’m listening to his slowing heart. There’s a twinkle in his eyes, a humor that’s alien. But it’s humor.
“Nope,” I say, giving it right back. If he wants to play, I’ll play. “Some rich guy was plowing me, so I figured I’d get pregnant and trap him.”
“Well fuck,” he says, shifting a little bit to find a more comfortable position. “Someone should warn the poor bastard.”
I feel his lips rest on the top of my head as my body melts into him. And the sudden sense that all is well fills me. He’s not making a big deal of things. He let me tease him for his screw up. Hell, he poked fun at himself. Most guys would be total assholes if I pointed out their mistakes. Not him. He took it like a champ and even played right into more jokes.
Maybe he’s not so bad after all.
Chapter 29
Kieran
For the first time ever, I feel bad leaving. I want nothing more than to stay with Emma. I want to watch her sleep, listen to her dream, and wake her up with another round before feeding her a solid breakfast.
But I have to get home. I’m a father. I’ve got obligations.
But she’s so sweet right here, beside me, her breathing even and slow. She’s sleeping. Peacefully. Without issues to the rough encounter we’d had. The pain I’d put her through. Even now, I see the redness of her exposed hip where the sheet had dug in. It’ll be hours before those go away. Hell, with how pale she is, they might even bruise.
The stinging in my shoulder is achingly painful, and I glance down, seeing where she’d sunk her teeth into me when I’d gone too far and hurt her. The skin is bruised and red, but I’m not upset. She’d stood her ground. She’d let me rough her up, but not without some protest.
In her sleep, she shifts, murmuring something unintelligible. I glance around her room, loving the slight blue tint to the off-white walls, the sheer curtains, the warmth of her pale yellow comforter. The room is chilly, yet warm. It’s filled by her. Her scent, her presence, her soul.
It feels like home.
I rise from her side, hating myself as she curls into the warmth I’d left behind. Everything in me wants to stay. But I can’t.
Obligations.
And, for the first time, I’m disappointed that I can’t stay. But if Olivia were to come looking for me and I wasn’t there… I don’t want that. She’s in a vulnerable place. And she has to come first.
Of course my daughter comes first. What am I even thinking?
Quietly, I get dressed.
I slip out the door, then out of the house, careful not to wake her. In the truck, I sit a moment, looking up at her room.
Billionaire Bash: The Complete Steele Series Page 39