Unlawful Desire

by Raven Dark

  “Oh, my God. I forgot how good you are at this.” A visible shiver ran through her and she relaxed a little more. He gently pushed her head forward, working his thumbs and fingers down the sides of her nape, pressing just hard enough to take the stiffness out. A long, sexy moan left her and he grinned at his effect on her.

  “Lean forward.” He bit back the almost automatic “girl.” She obeyed and he wondered if she was too into what he was doing to realize what she’d done. He worked his thumbs over the small of her back, out across the tight spots he’d seen her massage before.

  “Oh, wow. That’s good.”

  “Is this where it hurts?”

  She nodded, head still drooped.

  He leaned down putting his cheek to hers. “Are you going to tell me what happened to you?”

  “Nope.”

  “Why?”

  She looked up at him. “Because you don’t need to know, Rock.”

  Damn. Always in control. He would have been pissed at her tone but the vulnerability in her eyes softened his heart. Oh, the ways he would make her talk if she were his.

  He traced her chin with his fingers. “You’re right. You have gotten mouthier with time.”

  Her eyes fluttered closed for a moment and her chest shook with a breath. “Rock…”

  “Come here. You have some cherry stuff on your lip.”

  He took her chin between his thumb and fingers and leaned in. Her eyes widened. He crushed her mouth with his.

  * * * * *

  Ella resisted. She really did. For about an instant.

  The moment Rock leaned in and she realized he was going to kiss her, her thoughts raced down the predictable path.

  Rock was a natural Dom, from the authority that oozed from his voice, to the way he carried himself, with such discipline. Even his job as a lawyer spoke volumes. He probably sought justice the way he wielded a whip, swift, sharp, unyielding. She might have thought he was born with a whip coiled in his fist if she hadn’t seen Mac training him for herself. There was nothing submissive about him and he would never be comfortable in a relationship without kink anymore than she would, which left only one role for her. The one role she refused to take.

  But as soon as his mouth possessed hers, the whole argument seemed to lose all power in her mind. Six years away from him seemed like an eternity and all she wanted was to be in the arms of the man she’d never forgotten.

  Rock’s mouth slanted over hers, forcing her lips apart, hard and demanding. His tongue speared inside, eating at her mouth hungrily. The cherry and chocolate mixed with the taste of him, hot masculinity and mint.

  Wow, he was delicious, and he kissed like a god. She moaned against his mouth, opening for him. He even held her chin the way he had when they were together, between his thumb and fingers, keeping her head at the angle he wanted. His tongue slowed, every sexy flick making her pussy ache more.

  A low growl rumbled from him and he pulled back, leaving her breathless.

  “Come here.” Rock pulled her onto the couch with him and pushed her against the backrest. He leaned into her, his face so close his hot breath fanned her face.

  The heat of his body surrounded her and her mouth burned for more, her skin already hot to his touch. Yet the break in his kiss was enough to send common sense careening back in. Ella pushed gently on his chest.

  “Slow down, tiger. This isn’t a good idea.”

  He pulled back a little, eyes searching her face. “Don’t you want to be with me?”

  “God, if only you knew how much. But this can’t happen. You’re a Dom.”

  “What happened to you, Annabella?”

  She put her head back. The memories his question evoked, buried deep and unresolved for so long, swirled like shards of glass, each one ready to cut and slash. Ella put her hand to her forehead. She could feel a part of her trembling inside. Talking about this with him meant delving into something she’d locked away far back into her mind, far enough that it couldn’t hurt her anymore.

  This was Rock. The only man she’d ever loved. He deserved to know.

  She looked at the ceiling. “It was two years ago. I went to a party in New York with friends from school. The host was a Dom, Cord Northwood. We hit it off. After a few weeks, I agreed to play. He was nice and seemed to know what he was doing.”

  As her voice began to shake, Rock ran his fingers over her cheek, a tender caress. He listened without saying anything, but his gaze was almost too intent on her face.

  “When we got to his house, he took me to his playroom in the basement. Something didn’t seem right but I told myself it was just that I wasn’t used to him. He was my first, after you.”

  She shook her head, shame coursing through her. “So stupid. I should have known. He was being too nice. And the whole time at the party, people kept talking about putting me on “Cord’s Cross.” I thought they were talking about a Saint Andrew’s Cross. At the time, I didn’t notice anything wrong, but after it all happened, I realized something was off about the way they said it. Like the whole thing was a cruel joke and I should have gotten it.”

  She swallowed the hard lump in her throat, rubbing her forehead. Rock’s fingers made soft tracks across her cheek. Soothing, letting her know he was there.

  “So we’re in the basement and we start to play. He tells me to strip. He ties me to a cross and gets me hot. Flogging, spanking, you know. But then…” Another swallow. “Then a bunch of his friends showed up. I don’t know how many. They sat there, watching, laughing. Then he turned to a shelf and switched something on. It was a camera.”

  Rock’s eyes widened. “Jesus Christ.”

  She looked at him “I safeworded, Rock, I did.” Her eyes stung and she hated the need to defend herself. “I just kept shouting my safeword at him and he just kept filming me, and his friends kept laughing.”

  “Annabella.” He turned her face to him. “Look at me. Even if you hadn’t safeworded, it wouldn’t have mattered. This isn’t your fault. Remember what Mac always teaches us. Safe, sane, consensual. That idiot abused your trust and turned kink into something sick.”

  “I know. I know what happened wasn’t my fault, and deep down, I know subbing doesn’t mean I’ll be hurt again. But after it was over, I couldn’t... I promised myself I’d never, ever allow myself to be that vulnerable again.”

  “Did they…” Rock stopped, but she could hear where he was going from the dangerous softness in his voice.

  “Rape me? No, thank god. They might have if I hadn’t escaped.”

  The stormy look in his eyes calmed. Her heart swelled for him.

  “I managed to get one of the ropes loose and ran. It was winter and I slipped when one of them almost caught me outside. I smashed my back on one of the steps.”

  Rock rubbed her arm. “I’m so sorry. I wish I had been there for you.”

  “I know Rock.”

  He pulled her close, enclosing her in his arms. Tightness gripped her heart and she buried her face in his neck. It had been so long since he’d held her. So long since she’d let anyone hold her. She clutched his shirt.

  “I’m glad you didn’t let what happened scare you off BDSM.”

  “No, because I can control what happens. I’m good with sex, as long as there’s no bondage or crosses.” She pulled back a little. “But my subs know I don’t do public scenes.”

  “So you need total privacy.” Something flickered across his face, but it was gone before she could label it.

  “Yeah. I know that puts a lot of restrictions on me. Public displays are a huge part of BDSM, especially in the clubs, and a lot of clients like voyeurism, so I lose a lot of potential work. I miss them and I miss subbing, but I just can’t bring myself to do it.”

  Rock took her hand and pressed it to his warm chest. His heart hammered beneath her palm. “You could if you learned to trust again.”

  The implications in his words sank in and a touch of nervousness tightened her belly. Nervousness and hope.
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  “It’s all about trust, Annabella. You know that. You know me. I would never harm you and I would never do anything without your consent. Without working every detail out beforehand and making sure you knew what was going to happen in a scene.”

  She swallowed and nodded. “I know.” Dare she believe it? Was it possible something she’d missed, something that, with him, had become so essential to her being, could be that way again?

  He rubbed her arms, his face close to hers. “Will you let me help you?”

  She drew a deep breath.

  “I promise, we’ll take things slow. Let me show you everything can be all right again.”

  Oh, God. The tenderness in his eyes pinched her heart. She nodded.

  Rock crushed her to him and his mouth claimed hers.

  Ella melted into a puddle. His hands roved over her back while his mouth and tongue explored hers. Hard, deep, hot.

  A groan escaped and she drove her hands through his hair. Too soon, he lifted his head. When he spoke, his voice was low and soft. “I missed you.”

  Her chest rose and fell hard against his. “I missed you too, Rock.”

  He ran his hands over her back, cupping her shoulders warmly from behind so that all she felt was him. Heat. Male. Strength. Him.

  “Everything’s going to be all right, Annabella. I promise.”

  CHAPTER 5: MINE

  Ella’s Domme instincts kicked in the moment Rock carried her to his bed. She moved to scramble down. What self respecting Domme needed to be carried?

  “Going somewhere, Annabella?” Rock’s crooked smile sent butterflies into a frenzy in her belly. His grip under her knees tightened, keeping her from getting to her feet.

  “I…” Jesus, where were her snarky comebacks? How did he turn her brain to mush?

  “If you would rather me drag you in here by your hair like a caveman, I can, but either way, this is where you’ll be for the night.”

  With a huff, she put her arms around his neck. She wouldn’t have admitted it, but the feel of his strong arms around her and his hard frame pressed to her softness made her feel delightfully feminine. “I’m good. God forbid I walk to your bed, Rock.”

  “Damn right.”

  “If my subs could see me now.”

  “They can’t.” He lay her across the bed and slid his arms out from under her. Ella leaned up on her elbows, watching him go to the door and turn the lock.

  “Locking me in, are you?”

  “You know it.” He stalked across the room toward her. “Annabella, do you have some kind of fixation with my name?”

  “What are you talking about? No.”

  “Then I see no reason to delay protocol, do you?”

  She scrunched her brows. “Oh, you want me to call you Sir.”

  He stood at the side of the bed, looking down at her. One large hand slid into the back of her still bound hair and tugged lightly. Nothing like the aggression she was used to from him before, but still enough to bring her pussy to life.

  “If you have a problem with that, I’ll forbid you to speak.”

  “Rock…”

  “I won’t gag you, but there are plenty of ways to keep you quiet.”

  She relaxed a little. “I haven’t called a man Sir in a long time. These days, men address me as Mistress.”

  He brought his face so close to hers she could feel the heat of his mouth. “Well, you’d better get used to this. I’m not your sub. When we are in scene, you’ll address me the way I want. Clear?”

  Throat dry, Ella licked her lips. The man’s authority and self-assurance were still incredible. If she was honest with herself, nothing had felt as right as calling Rock Sir. When men called her Mistress that single word made her tingle, but this…this made her pulse race.

  “We’re clear…” She stopped short of saying the word he wanted to hear. She’d cooperate, but after this long he had to work for it.

  His fist tightened in her hair and the hint of pain went straight to her pussy. “We’re clear, who?”

  “We’re clear, Sir.”

  “Better.” He released her and lowered the light from a lamp on a table beside him. “I’m going to have so much fun with you, Annabella.”

  At the foot of the bed, Rock stripped and Ella swallowed. Every part of him was still ripped and powerful. His cock jutted up from between his legs, thick, hard, ready. Ella sat up to run her hands over his rippling chest. “You’re so beautiful, Sir.”

  Amusement twinkled in his eyes. He shoved her back into the mattress. “Settle down.”

  “Touchy.” But the authority in his voice made her pulse jump and she lay back, relaxing. He reached down and jerked her underwear and skirt off, tossing them aside. She squirmed, need coiling her muscles at the way his hungry gaze drank her in, taking in every inch, every soft curve.

  Finally, he came around the side of the bed and lay beside her. He rested his head on the pillows and pulled her toward him.

  “Come here, girl.”

  Oh, fuck. He said the words exactly as he always had when they were together, with that unmistakable possession that reminded her exactly what he expected of her. Total and complete obedience. Ella moved to lie against him.

  “No, get on top of me.”

  “Bossy.” She got up on her knees, but stopped with her hand on his shoulder. “Wait a minute, I thought you didn’t like women on top.”

  “I don’t, normally.”

  “Then why?”

  “Are you going to question everything, girl?” He sighed patiently, one hand cupping her cheek. “I know subbing won’t come as easy to you. I want to regain your trust. All right?”

  The attentiveness in his words made her smile. She straddled him, watching his expression, the way his eyes burned with hunger, the satisfied twist of his mouth. He seized her hips, pressing her easily down onto him, positioning her so that she sat right over his cock. The heat of him burned into her already wet pussy. His hands moved warmly up and down along her legs, exploring the contour of her thighs.

  She ran her hands up his chest. The faint sent of almonds and axle grease lingered on him. Ah, heaven.

  “Do the same rules apply as before? When we were together?”

  “They do. So, let’s start with this.” He pulled the clips from her hair and let it tumble to her shoulders, down her back. Running his hands through its softness. A pleased sound vibrated from him.

  “Of course. You and the hair thing.”

  “When you’re with me, your hair is down at all times. And no coming without my permission. Understand?”

  She rolled her eyes to hide how hungry his demands made her. “Yes, Rock. I mean Sir.”

  “Good. And that.” He took her chin between his finger and thumb. “The eye rolling thing stops too. When you are with me, you are not a Domme. Get used to it.”

  She bit her lip to keep from arguing.

  He leaned up, cupping her face in his hands. His mouth brushed hers, a slow, hot caress at first. Ella moaned and he devoured her in a kiss. The heat of his hands scalded her skin as he worked the buttons on her blouse free and pushed the garment from her shoulders then unclasped her bra and tossed it aside.

  Every thrust and flick of his tongue made her hotter, wetter, and she kissed him back eagerly, raking her hands through his hair.

  “No.” He pulled back and seized her hands, setting them on the headboard behind him. “Your hands stay here. I won’t bind you, but no touching me.”

  “You’ve got to be kidding. Six years since you’ve fucked me and I can’t touch you?”

  “Are you going to argue?”

  Ella sighed and leaned forward a little, holding the top of the headboard above his head. Raising a brow at him. “Happy, Sir?”

  “Don’t speak to me with that insolent tone.” He ran the back of his hand over her throat. “I’ll spank you instead of fucking you if you’re going to mouth off.”

  “No, I’m good.”

  A low groan left h
im as his gaze dropped to her breasts, bared for his view. “So gorgeous.” He palmed the generous globes and sucked one nipple into his mouth until she arched her back on a gasp. His tongue swirled and flicked, mouth sucking her nipple long and hard, almost painful. “I love your tits in my mouth, girl.”

  “Fuck…” She gripped the back of his head without thinking.

  “Hands, girl,” he mumbled without lifting his head. His hands roved over her bare back, strong, hot, and possessive.

  Ella panted and returned her grip to the headboard.

  “Better.”

  The smugness half-aroused, half-irritated her. If he were her sub, she’d have put him over a table and made him stay there with a stick of ginger up his ass. The spice would burn hot enough to remind him of his place without causing damage. She almost laughed at the idea of what Rock would do if she tried that. Probably tan her ass until she couldn’t sit for a week.

  “Lift up.” She obeyed and he slid two fingers through her slick folds. He made a carnal sound and his cock bobbed against his stomach. He glided his fingers into her, pumped them in and out until she panted and rocked her hips. She reached to stroke him, eager to feel the hardness in her hand, or better yet, her mouth, and he stilled her hands. She let them drop to the sides. He paused, eyes searching her face.

  “I’ll save the name calling for next time.”

  “Why? You don’t have to hold back, Sir.”

  “I love the way you beg me when I call you my slut, but I want you to trust me completely first.”

  Disappointment tightened her belly. The pure possessiveness, the unwavering confidence in him when he talked like that gave her a rush like nothing else. But she nodded, loving his attentiveness. He slid his fingers out of her and worked her opening over the head of his cock until Ella moaned, head back, her pussy throbbing. She swore he was bigger, wider than she remembered.

  “See how fucking hard you make me?” Rock growled and lifted his hips up, thrusting deep.

  She gripped the back of his head until his mouth tightened in warning, then held the headboard with both hands.