Just Like Em

by Marion Ekholm

  “You’re seeing Roger?”

  The exuberance in Jodie’s voice made Em pause as she returned her attention to the phone. For a moment, no words came to mind. Finally she said, “No. What gave you that idea?”

  “You’re taking my niece shopping, which means you’ve made inroads with Roger, big-time. He never lets her out of his sight, let alone allows her to go off with a relative stranger.”

  “I’m not exactly a stranger. Besides, he offered to take Sammy camping with the boys. It was the least I could do to help.” Em paused. She didn’t like discussing Roger and the problems he might be having with his daughter. How could she steer the conversation in another direction? “So, do you want to join us for a shopping marathon?”

  “I’d love to, but I can’t. Sam already asked me, and I had to beg off. When Harve said he was taking Timothy camping this weekend, my friend and I booked ourselves into the Princess for a weekend of pampering. The spa has summer rates. Maybe you’d like to join us?”

  “No. I’m committed to shopping with Samantha.”

  “You probably will be committed after a day with a teenager. Why not come just for Saturday night and Sunday? Have all your tense muscles massaged by some tanned Nordic god.” Distracting noises on Jodie’s end momentarily stopped the conversation.

  The image of extravagance that Jodie had conjured appealed to Em. How nice to be able to have any cares massaged away and to spend a delightful weekend with friends. But she couldn’t afford such luxuries, no matter how good the summer rates.

  When Jodie came back on the phone, she said, “Harve’s back. So, how about Saturday? Should I book you in with Eric or Finn? Either can uncoil a really tight muscle.”

  “Thanks, but I think not. What’s Harve’s take on these Nordic gods? Does he approve?”

  “Oh, he says he doesn’t mind if I read the menu as long as I eat at home. Right, dear?” The words were followed by what sounded like a kiss. “I’ve got to go. See you at noon tomorrow?”

  “Where?”

  “You pick a place.”

  “How about Applebee’s, the one near my work?” Em provided an address.

  When the line went dead abruptly, she placed the phone on a tiny plastic table, tilted the chair back and enjoyed the night air. The pink slowly left the sky. No matter how hot the summer day might be, the nights were delightfully cool. Only another month and even the daytime temperatures would start to fall.

  The more she thought about meeting Jodie, the more Em realized how difficult it might be. During their years together as best friends, Em had never let on about how much she adored Jodie’s brother. That crush seemed ridiculous now, yet she wasn’t sure she cared to discuss it. Jodie might take it wrong and think Em still had feelings for Roger. Having seen Jodie in matchmaking mode, Em wanted to avoid giving her any ideas.

  Well, the restaurant Em had chosen might help. The food was great, but it was crowded at noon, and the noise level too high to have any kind of intimate conversation.

  The door opened behind Em, a light flicking over her before it closed again.

  “Here you are,” Doris said as she took the other chair. “Sammy’s getting ready for bed. You haven’t mentioned the camping trip?”

  “No. I thought I’d do it tomorrow night. It will be less traumatic if he doesn’t have too much time to think about it.”

  “For you or for him?”

  Although the area held little light, Em could still see the disapproval on her mother’s face. “His asthma kicks in when he gets stressed.”

  “I’ve always felt one of the biggest joys in life was the anticipation of pleasant things. You’re robbing him of that.”

  “His body can’t distinguish between pleasant things and harmful things.” Em fought to keep her voice even. “Stress is stress whether you win a million dollars or lose the same amount.”

  Her mother sighed. “So, who was on the phone? Roger have another computer glitch?”

  Em was thankful for the change in topic. “No. It was Jodie. We’re meeting for lunch tomorrow.”

  “You don’t sound too pleased.”

  Her mother could always pick up on Em’s moods. “She asked if something was going on between Roger and me.”

  “And you said...?”

  “The truth. Nothing’s going on.”

  “Remind yourself of that a few thousand times between now and then, and maybe you’ll be able to convince her.” Doris pushed away from her chair and stood. “Maybe you’ll be able to convince yourself.”

  * * *

  EM ARRIVED AT the restaurant in one of her new summer dresses, carrying a jacket in case the air-conditioning was too cold. She arrived a few minutes before twelve in the hope of getting a table ahead of everyone else working nearby who came out for lunch. Jodie was already there, drink in hand, sitting at the bar. She looked cool in shorts and a sleeveless jersey top in shades of blue. Her dark hair was pulled back and held with clips similar to what she had worn at the party.

  “Hi. I thought I’d wait here until our table is ready. Have you tried their strawberry daiquiris?” Jodie took a long sip and sighed. “I could live on these.”

  “They’re probably terribly healthy, as well. All that fruit.” They both chuckled as the hostess indicated their table was ready and led them to a corner. The table next to them quickly filled with another couple.

  “I’ll have what she’s having,” Em said, when the waiter came over for drink orders. Although liquor usually zapped her energy, not a good thing when she had to return to work, it also served to bolster her courage. She needed all the fortification she could get in case their conversation turned to Roger.

  “I’ll take a water. This is enough extravagance for me,” Jodie said, pointing to her half-finished daiquiri.

  When the waiter left, Em thought of safe topics and asked, “How are your parents? I didn’t see them at Timothy’s party.”

  “They’re doing fine. Daddy decided they needed to see the world, so he takes Mom on every cruise he can find. They’re looking to sell their house and get a condo.”

  “You’re kidding. That beautiful home?”

  “It’s way too big for them. They asked if Harve and I’d be interested, but I said no.”

  “I really loved that place.” It had been Em’s first experience in a real house, not the apartments she’d lived in all her life. In her youth, she’d believed only happy families lived in houses and the ones with problems lived in apartments. Nothing had proven her wrong. “Some of my best memories were reading in your mother’s rose garden next to your grandparents’ cottage. Or us spending endless nights talking in your bedroom. I can’t see how you would want to give it up.”

  “I know, I love the place, as well. But, frankly, I’m afraid it would be too much work keeping up the extra house. We have no use for it, and I don’t want the problems of renting it.”

  Jodie took a sip of her drink, then moved closer to Em and said in a conspiratorial whisper. “You know, when you were living with us that summer, I thought they were going to adopt you.”

  “You’re kidding.”

  “Nope. No one told me why you were there, about the divorce and all. I thought they were finally giving me the sister I always wanted.”

  Jodie looked over the rim of her glass before placing it on the table. “We had some good times. Remember stealing Roger’s beer? He would have killed us if he’d ever found out.” She looked up and laughed. “My parents would have killed us.” Jodie smiled and sat back in her seat. “I cried for a week after you left.”

  “So did I.” But not for the same reason. Em had missed Jodie, but not as much as she’d missed Roger. She had kept him alive for years in her dreams, her diaries.

  “You got out just in time, before the fireworks started.”

>   Em’s drink arrived at that moment, interrupting any further conversation. Em glanced at her watch. She only had forty-five minutes left in her lunch hour. Jodie’s last statement intrigued her, but Em followed the same discipline that had kept her secret safe in the past. Too many questions about Roger might wave red flags. Jodie picked up the menu and didn’t bother to give any more details, so Em let the subject drop.

  “I have to head back soon,” Em said. “New job and all. Don’t want to break too many rules.”

  “What do you do?”

  “Payroll. I also create weekly, monthly and quarterly reports that show where all the money went. At least the job has some variety, not just working with endless figures.”

  “I’d love to go back to work once Timothy starts school. I met Harve when we took similar courses in college, but I wasn’t interested in becoming a lawyer so I became a paralegal. With a few brush-up courses, I’m sure I could get back into it.”

  It didn’t appear that Jodie planned to get back to their former topic, so after the waiter brought them water and took their orders, Em bolstered her nerve and asked, “What fireworks?”

  Jodie looked confused.

  “You mentioned there were fireworks after I left.”

  “Oh, that. Roger got into trouble.”

  Drugs, jail, and DUI all went through Em’s mind. “What kind of trouble?”

  “He and Karen had to get married.”

  Em sat back. “Oh.”

  “The whole thing turned into a regular soap opera. Karen’s mother was livid.” Jodie threw up a hand and hit the stained glass globe above the table. The two women next to them glanced at them pointedly before returning to their food. “She did everything she could to prevent the marriage, insisted the baby would be better off if they put it up for adoption.”

  Em felt sudden empathy for Karen. Give up your child? How could anyone suggest such a thing?

  “They took off for Las Vegas and got married. Mom and Dad continued to pay for his education, but Karen’s parents cut her off completely, so she never returned to school. My grandparents had moved into a retirement village by then, so the newlyweds took over the cottage. It wasn’t until after Samantha came that Karen’s mother even spoke to them again.”

  “So it all worked out.”

  “Right. Until Karen died. Roger took it so hard. He still refuses to date anyone.” Jodie leaned across the table and grinned. “Until you came along, that is.”

  “I already told you, we’re not dating. Our boys have become fast friends, that’s all.” Em took a long drink of her daiquiri just before their salads arrived and avoided making eye contact. “Roger included Sammy in this trip for the boys, and I volunteered to pay him back by taking Samantha shopping. That’s it. Nothing romantic about that.” She offered a quick smile before diving into her food.

  After a deep sigh, Jodie said, “I used to wish you’d marry Roger. Then you could become my sister for real.”

  Em slowly chewed her food. So she hadn’t been the only one with secret fantasies.

  “I never could figure out the two of you. How come you hated each other so much?”

  Em reached for her water to stem a choking fit. One of the women near her moved closer and asked if she needed help. Em shook her head.

  Finally able to breathe again, she said, “We were water and oil.”

  “I guess. And now he’s so strung up about Karen. I don’t think he’ll ever get over her.”

  Em pushed her salad away, her appetite suddenly gone.

  CHAPTER SIX

  “MILLIE, HOW ARE YOU?” Roger asked. The unexpected phone call from his mother-in-law made him sit straighter in his chair. A relationship that had started poorly back when he married her daughter hadn’t progressed much since then.

  If only he had an assistant. Then all his calls would be monitored, and he could avoid dealing with the frustration that usually followed a conversation with Millie. Roger leaned across his desk and jotted, “Check out displaced again for administrative assistants.”

  “I’m not bothering you at the office, am I?”

  “No. Of course not. Is anything wrong?”

  “Yes, something’s wrong,” Millie said in that authoritative voice that grated on his nerves. He pictured the woman, with her white curls and stiff spine, scolding him for some infraction, something she did regularly whenever they spoke.

  “You’ve lost your job, and you’re too proud to even ask for help. If it wasn’t for my granddaughter, I’d never have known you were even in this predicament.” She paused and added more solicitously, “I’m here for you, dear. You should know that.” Another pause. “Especially now that your parents are gone.”

  His parents had left on a cruise, for heaven’s sake. Millie made it sound as though they had died. Roger leaned across his desk again and drew the picture of his wife closer. “I—we appreciate your offer, but I’m fine.”

  “How can you say that,” Millie asked, her tone getting more irritating, “when that Mexican woman is leaving? Who will you get to replace her?”

  “You mean Sophia?”

  “Whatever. It’s just as well she’s going. You know how I feel about her speaking Spanish to the children all the time. Why, the twins thought it was their native language for the first few years of their lives. It’s downright un-American.”

  Roger placed his hand over the receiver and spoke to his wife’s picture. “At least they won’t have to bumble through a foreign language in high school the way we did.” Karen smiled back, even though when alive she had usually warned him to be nice to her mother.

  “What did you say?”

  “Someone just came into my office. Was there anything else?”

  “You’ll need someone to watch the children. Why not send them to stay with me? They love Flagstaff, and it’s so much cooler here,” Millie continued. “Honestly, dear, who in their right mind can spend a summer in Phoenix and remain sane?”

  “Millie, I—I’m sorry but the children are staying here with me. I’m working on getting a full-time nanny for them. I assure you, everything is fine. Got to go now. Thanks for calling.”

  Without waiting for a reply, Roger hung up the phone. He grabbed the pad and wrote down two more items to take care of, “Tell Samantha not to share all our problems with her grandmother” and “Look into getting a nanny.”

  The last thing he wanted was Millie influencing their lives.

  * * *

  “YES, YES, YES!” Sammy danced around the living room, not able to contain his joy about the camping trip. “Where we goin’, Ma?”

  “You’re going—if you want to—with Chip and Chaz.”

  “Yes!” Sammy said as he pulled a fisted hand into his body to emphasize his agreement. “When?”

  “Tomorrow morning...”

  He stopped. “Why can’t we go tonight?”

  Em explained further, and his enthusiasm cooled. Her heart warmed. He’d miss her too much to go and leave her behind. “It’s okay if you don’t want to go.”

  “Oh, I’m goin’. What do you take on a campin’ trip, anyway?” he inquired over his shoulder as he headed toward the room they shared. By the time she reached him, he already had half the contents of his drawer on his bed.

  When Em returned to the kitchen, Doris asked, “So he likes the idea?”

  “What do you think? I’m definitely low man on the totem pole where Chaz and Chip are concerned. I just hope Sammy sleeps well tonight.”

  “You worry too much.”

  “Of course I worry. Mothers do that.” Em started to reach for the mail on the counter, but Doris intercepted her.

  “That’s mine,” she said and slipped an opened envelope into her apron pocket. The logo on the envelope looked like the apartment co
mplex’s.

  “They aren’t raising the rent, are they?” Em asked, aware that their lease was up the end of August. She flipped through her credit card bill. Good, she had paid off enough that she could buy a few things when she went shopping with Samantha.

  “Grandmothers, on the other hand, know that worrying never helped their own children one bit,” Doris said, returning to the previous topic.

  Em focused on her mother. “You worried about me?”

  “Of course I did.”

  “When?” Her mother always seemed so consumed with her own problems.

  “Too many times to recall.”

  “Name one.”

  Doris glanced at the ceiling as she leaned against the counter. “We really need a paint job in here. It wasn’t done before I moved in. I should have insisted.”

  “Stop changing the subject, Mom. When did you worry about me?”

  With a deep sigh, Doris pushed away from the counter and pointed to the dining room. “Let’s sit.”

  Chuckling, Em followed her mother into the dimly lit room and took a seat. “Oh, so the list is so long and complicated we need to get comfortable.”

  Doris pulled a straight-backed chair from the table. “As if we could get comfortable on these. You know how we acquired these chairs? Your grandmother...”

  “Mom. You’re fudging. We’re not talking about chairs.”

  “Okay, okay.” Focusing on the ceiling again, Doris continued, “Do you see that paint peeling up there?”

  “Mom!”

  Doris glanced at Em then quickly looked away. She paused long enough that Em felt she might not get to the subject at all. Could her mother be turning senile? After all, she was moving up in years. Em was about to prod her again, when Doris said, “I worried about how you were handling the divorce.”

  “Which divorce?”

  “Mine.”

  “No you didn’t,” Em replied. Recalling those days when her parents screamed at each other brought back all the insecurities that had kept her awake at night. “You left me high and dry with the Holdens.”