by K. J. Colt
I brought my hand to my mouth and pulled it away again. I put the pips on the table and stamped the floor with my foot.
‘Do it!’ I screamed. I picked them up again and put them in my mouth. They tasted acerbic and burned my tongue. I spat them across the room, and they disappeared in the cracks of the floor and under furniture. I rushed to a barrel of water and scooped the liquid into my mouth, rinsing out the taste.
I trembled from what I’d almost done. So much life had been taken. Why take more? Then I knew what I had to do. I went to my doorway. I saw a warrior and made him bring me Jeykal. I went back inside and waited.
Jeykal flew through my doorway and scooped my hands up in his. ‘What is it? What’s wrong?’
‘Calm down.’ I looked out the door to make sure no one was near. ‘I’m going to tell Father,’ I whispered.
His features twisted. ‘About…?’ He looked at my stomach, and I nodded. ‘Madness. He’ll kill it. He’ll kill you!’ He reached out and slid his fingertips under my shirt. I shuddered at the sensation, but it wasn’t lust or desire; it was reassurance. He felt the place where the bump would soon form. Maybe a month, maybe two. I would no longer be able to hide my secret.
‘I have to. I can’t let Skelkra rule. And I can’t kill this child. I want both.’
‘It’s impossible, Klawdia.’ He put a hand to my face, but I pushed it away.
‘Don’t try to talk me out of this. I must have peace. Much rests on my shoulders. I have to do the right thing. Will you fetch him for me?’
Jeykal rubbed his face and hair and spun around with agitation. He strode back to me. ‘Wait! If you’re sure about this, then we must prepare for his response.’
‘You can’t know what he’ll say.’
Jeykal bit his lip. ‘If you’re going to keep acting this wild, then you need to prepare for the consequences. Pack a bag of anything you need to survive. And I mean survive in the mountains, for if your father desires you dead, then the only refuge you’ll find is in the Death Peaks.’
‘Jeykal—’
He held up his hand. ‘Just do it for me.’
I regarded him for a moment. He’d never spoken to me with any sort of authority before.
‘Now!’ he urged.
I obeyed and found a knapsack. I stuffed it with clothes, medicines, thread, a mallet, a chisel, a flint, a water sack, and other items I might need.
Jeykal tapped his finger on his temple. ‘Your father will respond one of four ways. One, he’ll accept your baby and hide it from the city somehow. It will live, and you’ll rule. Two, he’ll force the other leaders to accept the child as legitimate, and you’ll still become leader. Three, you’ll be able to keep the baby but not lead, not even your own tribe, and four—which seems the most likely—he’ll force you to kill it. Or he’ll kill you.’
I stopped packing to stare at him. Would Father really try to kill my child? He could be cruel, I knew that, but murder? Or even murder me? It disturbed me more that I couldn’t even answer that question. ‘That’s five,’ I said.
Jeykal frowned at me. ‘The last one counts as two. For I believe that if he kills your child, a part of you will die with it. Either way, it’s a bad outcome.’
I sighed at his melodrama, but Jeykal was right. Losing my child would be like losing my very soul, and I would never forgive Father. In fact, I might even want revenge.
I unhooked my dagger from the back of my pants and stared at the clean blade. ‘What if I killed Father?’
‘I know you, Klawdia. You would never. Even if you could, no one would follow you.’
‘I wouldn’t in cold blood, but sometimes Father can be…’
‘I know.’ Jeykal looked at the floor. ‘I’ve known you a long time. It wouldn’t be the first time he’s hurt you.’
I shook my head. ‘No.’
We both jumped when Father threw open my door. He stared at me, and my heart raced in my chest. I felt exposed, as though he could hear my thoughts. His eyes flicked to my dagger. Jeykal looked startled; he’d never been very good at hiding his feelings. For a second, I wanted to punch him for it.
Father loomed over me. ‘You will tell me what I’ve interrupted here.’ He looked back at the trembling Jeykal. The chieftain of Ruxdor’s face grew red and dark, and his eyes flicked back to the knife clutched in my hand.
Chapter Eleven
I bowed my head. ‘Father, you’ve not interrupted—’
‘I came to tell you of the initiation ceremony that will happen under the light of the next full moon.’ Father took the dagger from my hand, placed it on the table, and stared at Jeykal, then at me, a question on his face. I could see the fierce storm brewing inside of him; he didn’t like to be trifled with.
I swallowed. ‘Father—’
‘Yes?’ He crossed his arms. Somehow he knew what I was going to say would displease him.
Jeykal moved towards my weapons rack. What was he thinking? I glared at him and then quickly put on a fake smile for Father.
‘I…’ I struggled to get the words out. I feared his anger, but not for my own sake. I feared for my child’s life. I had to protect it. ‘I’m with child.’ The words tumbled out of my mouth like an avalanche, and I waited for the impact.
I watched as realisation flashed across his face. His features hardened. ‘Then I will fetch Gevilka; she will end the conception.’ His movements were stiff as he uncrossed his arms and turned to leave.
I glanced at Jeykal. He’d moved even closer to the weapons rack, obviously knowing as well as I did that this would not turn out well.
‘No, Father. This baby will live.’ I put my hand to my stomach.
The greatest man in Ruxdor froze, straightened, and turned around. ‘Impossible. The Bear pride—’
‘I know, but—’
‘How can you expect to rule with Skelkra’s child? You must bond with him.’
‘He is not fit to rule. He is heartless.’
‘And you are reckless!’ Father moved towards me. ‘Why have you done this to me? Why?’
From the corner of my eye, I saw Jeykal move his hand to an axe.
I knew Father’s question required no answer. He saw the child as a personal attack on him. ‘I did not mean to hurt you.’
‘No? Yet here we are. You have a habit of hurting me, don’t you?’ He talked of my mother. His life mate. His everything. I had destroyed his every happiness and brought him no joy through my existence. I only reminded him of what my birth had taken from him.
‘I’m sorry,’ I said, tears running down my face.
Father grabbed my shoulders. ‘You will halt this birth. No son or daughter will be born out of bondage to another. Understand?’
I pushed his hands away, shaking my head. ‘I won’t do it.’
Father breathed out, his face red. Beads of sweat formed on his brow. He reached for me, then stopped and moved his hands to his own face. ‘You disobey me?’
‘Yes.’ I knew what I wanted. A leader commands, not asks or requests. I had to be leader.
Father lunged at me, grabbed me by my hair, and pushed my face to the floor. He squeezed my broken arm. Instead of crying out, I focused on the smell of the dry dust and oak that irritated my nostrils. Then, he hauled me back to my feet, squeezed my neck, and pushed me towards the door.
‘People will see us,’ I cried.
But Father was in a rage so fierce he could not speak, let alone hear. He pushed me into the wall beside the entranceway. My cheek hit the wall, and then he pulled me back again.
Suddenly, Jeykal jumped on him from behind. Father took two steps back, ripping a hunk of my hair from my head, but I was free. Father grabbed a nearby broom and swung it at my friend. I considered knocking Father across the head.
‘Jeykal! No! Father!’ I cried at them both, but they ignored me.
Jeykal ducked and darted.
‘Go, Klawdia,’ Jeykal yelled and nodded towards the knapsack I’d packed.
I shook my
head.
‘Go!’ he cried again and grabbed an axe from my rack.
‘Don’t kill him.’ I didn’t know who I spoke to. I picked up my knapsack, strung a bow across my body, grabbed my dagger, and fled from my home with no hope of ever returning.
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About the Author
Kylie J. Colt lives on the west coast of Australia in the sprawling city of Perth and has been writing for three years. Her favourite writers are Kristin Cashore, Robin Hobb, Trudi Canavan and Maria V. Snyder. She has an honours degree in psychology and counselling, enjoys road trips, gaming (Skyrim/Civilisation/Assassin’s Creed), music festivals (electronica), playing pool, yoga, bushwalking, and gobbles up anything fantasy-related. Her favourite fantasy shows include Game of Thrones and Trueblood, and she is currently reading Robin Hobb’s Blood of Dragons.