Cam Boy

by Quinn Anderson

  According to Colette, scams like that were common. It made Josh feel grateful to be associated with a company like Murmur Inc. instead of out there on his own. He was certain the stories were intended to make him feel that way.

  Colette explained their hours of operation (boring), how performers were expected to market themselves (really boring), and pay scales (cha-ching). Josh could not, as he’d thought before, make an unlimited amount of money. Market demand had a lot to do with what he’d be paid and how often he’d be scheduled. Since they were all new faces, Colette assured them that viewers would clamor to see them, but porn moved fast. People were always looking for the next new extreme. If they wanted to stay on top, they would have to accrue a loyal fan base, find a niche, and/or perform increasingly extreme sexual acts.

  “That’s why,” Colette explained, “most porn stars have a short shelf life.”

  Josh didn’t bother raising his hand this time. “How short?”

  Colette answered, though she looked peeved about it. “Some of you will star in one film and never do it again. In the biz, we call you shooting stars. A brief, bright streak across the sky, and then you flame out. Realistically, most of you will work for three to six months.”

  There was a grumble from the crowd. Josh was too surprised to add his own murmurings to the mix. Six months max? That’s all?

  Colette waited for them to quiet before continuing. “I’m not going to lie to you. That’s a promise you can hold me to. Most of you are not going to be the next Linda Lovelace. You’ll never be a household name. The people who make a career out of porn are one in a million. However, in three months, my average porn star makes the same money that most people make in a year. And that’s average. My top earners make enough money to make CEOs jealous.”

  Josh let out a low whistle. If I can become a top earner and not burn out, I can make one hell of a life for myself . . .

  “But don’t take my word for it.” Colette turned to the people next to her. There were five of them, Sean included. “Talk to them yourself. I’ve gathered a few of my best and brightest stars. They’re here to answer questions, tell you about the harsh realities of the biz, relate some of their personal experiences, and, in a sense, mentor you. Their time is extremely valuable—I know; I sign their checks—so use it wisely.”

  Colette turned the floor over. There were two men, two women, and one person who was the definition of androgynous. But Josh only had eyes for Sean. He looked ultra-sexy in a white dress shirt, a black suit vest, and tight, dark jeans. Something about the mix of business and casual made Josh want to mix some business with pleasure.

  Focus, dude. You gotta prove him wrong.

  One of the women asked if anyone had any questions, and hands shot up into the air. Josh realized that he should have saved his questions for the Q&A session.

  Oops.

  He tried to pay attention to what everyone was asking, but his eyes kept drifting over to Sean, and with them, his focus. Sean was standing with his chin up, legs apart, and his arms folded over his chest. It was a classic confident stance, and it suited him. In fact, as he fielded a question about the use of condoms in gay porn, he looked as natural as a teacher standing in front of a class. A sexy teacher, whom Josh wouldn’t mind staying after school with . . .

  “I’m what’s known as a crossover,” Sean said in reference to some question.

  The unfamiliar term brought Josh’s attention screeching back to the present.

  “That means I work with people of all genders.”

  “Does that give you more opportunities?” asked a young and devastatingly handsome blond man.

  Sean’s eyes moved to the beautiful blond. “Yes and no. While you would think working with more than one gender would multiply your opportunities, some performers won’t work with me at all because of it. It has to do with STI testing and some complicated politics.”

  The blond cocked his head to the side in a way that was infuriatingly coy. “Why not just do straight gigs, then?”

  “Because traditional gay porn pays better.” Sean flashed a wicked smile that went straight between Josh’s legs. “And because I love dick.”

  The crowd laughed, but Josh was too busy being jealous and turned on to join them. The effect Sean had on him didn’t make any sense. But he knew one thing: he did not like the way Sean was eyeing that blond.

  Once again, Josh’s hand flew into the air.

  Sean’s gaze snapped to him. His smile turned from wicked to downright evil. “Ah, Dick. Good to see you again.”

  There were some titters from the crowd. More than one person turned to get a glimpse of the man who knew one of Colette’s stars.

  “You too.” It wasn’t a lie.

  “What’s your question?”

  “My question is actually for Colette.” Even as he said that, Josh’s gaze never wavered from Sean. The same strange charge that had sprung up between them at the audition rose again, like a trail of fire.

  “Yes?” It was Colette’s voice.

  “You said if we don’t quit, then we’re going to film our first video after this, right?”

  “Right. Was that your question, or did you think the room was missing a parrot?”

  More laughter. Josh ignored it.

  He delivered his next question still without taking his eyes off Sean. “Do we get to pick our first partners?”

  A hush fell over the assembly. Something in Sean’s face changed. It was subtle, but Josh saw every minute twitch. The heat between them lowered, but became more focused, like an ember still burning long after the log had collapsed into ash. Sean looked much more serious than a moment before, but also curious. It was as if this were his first time seeing Josh.

  “No,” Colette answered. “Your partners will be chosen by me.”

  Josh’s disappointment cleaved him in two.

  But Colette wasn’t finished yet. “I do, however, take preferences into account when I make my selections, and I try to pair up people who work well together. If you don’t like what you get, no one is forcing you to be here. You can always back out of any performance at any time. But this is a business, first and foremost, and we have to give the clients what they want. Keep in mind, the more money the company makes, the more money you make. We’re in this together. Understood?”

  Josh finally looked away from Sean. “Yes.”

  “Good.” Colette considered him. “In your case, I think I have your partner in mind already, should you make it that far.”

  His pulse doubled. Does she mean . . . He hadn’t dared to think he’d get to work with Sean again. And yet, every time he’d imagined filming, he’d imagined Sean.

  Colette shifted her focus back to the crowd. “Are there any more questions?”

  No one raised their hand.

  “All right, then. It’s showtime. Those of you who’ve decided to stay can follow me up to the third floor. The rest of you can go out the way you came.” She strode to the door without looking back. Her stars fell into step behind her like ducklings following their mother.

  Right before Sean ducked through the doorway, he glanced back. Josh had no idea if it was intentional or a coincidence, but his eyes locked right onto Josh. Fuck, it was ridiculous how much that one look excited him.

  Sean was gone before Josh had a chance to react. As soon as the door shut behind them, the newbies broke into whispers. One guy made a beeline for the exit, heading down. A handful of others meandered over to the desk and picked up a handbook. And a few others, including the handsome blond, grabbed handbooks and then went for the door, except they went up toward the third floor.

  Josh didn’t need to deliberate. He knew what he was going to do. What he had to do, not simply for financial reasons, but because he had something to prove. To Sean. To Colette. To himself.

  After taking a book, Josh made his way to the stairs and climbed up.

  “You know you’re the perfect man for the job.”

  Mike struggled w
ith both his desire to argue and his knowledge that arguing with Colette was fruitless. “I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

  “Why not?” Colette was perched on the edge of a desk, a stiletto-clad foot swinging in the air. They’d excused themselves to one of the empty cubicles that populated the third floor of Murmur Inc., where the phone sex operators were busy making calls all around them. “You saw the way he was looking at you during the Q&A. You don’t think you two have chemistry?”

  That’s exactly the problem. I think we do.

  “Yeah, but you saw how abruptly he left after we finished filming in Bel Air. He couldn’t get away from me fast enough.”

  “That doesn’t mean anything. He probably had somewhere to be, or he was embarrassed. He’d recently finished filming his first scene, after all. I was there, babe. I saw for myself how well you two got along. I think you can do it again.”

  “It’s not a good fit. He’s too green.” Mike prayed she couldn’t read his true feelings in his body language. He had a decent poker face, but Colette had a knack for seeing through it. Then again, he couldn’t consciously hide feelings he didn’t fully understand himself. All he knew was he was resistant to working with Josh. Or Dick, as he’d have to call him on camera.

  He’d come up with a number of great excuses—like the newbie thing, or the fact that Josh seemed to have imprinted on him like a fucking gosling—but that was all they were: excuses.

  The truth went deeper than that, though he didn’t know how far. His gut told him that working with Josh would change things, and for some reason, it scared the hell out of him.

  Colette shrugged. “It seemed like a good fit the other night. I think you bring something out in Dick.”

  “He could be like that with everyone for all you know. Pick someone else.” Mike gestured to the busy room around them. There were two dozen or so performers on standby, waiting to see how many of the new recruits showed up. “You have no shortage of people who’d love to work.”

  “I will, if you insist. You’ve paid your dues, so if you object to the pairing that much, I’ll respect your wishes.”

  Mike breathed a sigh of relief.

  “But—”

  The sigh caught in his throat like a shard of glass.

  “—first you have to look me in the eye and tell me that you have no desire whatsoever to work with Dick. If that’s the case, I’ll never assign you two to the same project. Ever.”

  Fuck. She knew exactly how to manipulate him. Mike didn’t think he could tell a lie that egregious to her face. He wanted to work with Josh. Really wanted to. He couldn’t explain why. Josh had a mouth the size of the Midwest, and he was clueless to the point of his own detriment, but Mike liked that about him. Somehow.

  It didn’t hurt that Mike found him ridiculously attractive, either. Since their first meeting, he’d had dreams about kissing bruises into that long neck of his. Just thinking about it made him want to—

  No. He was a professional. This was another gig, like any other. He’d do his damn job, as he always did. He’d show Colette he could handle whatever she threw at him.

  “All right, I’ll do it,” Mike said. “But only because I can’t blacklist a new porn star before I know what sort of career they’re going to have. For all I know, Dick’s gonna be the next Brent Corrigan.” It wasn’t a total lie, and so he was able to deliver it without flinching.

  “Then it’s settled.” Colette climbed to her feet with a click. “Assuming Dick shows up—which I’m quite certain he will—he’s all yours.” Her gaze flickered over his shoulder. “Speak of the devil, there he is now. I’ve reserved Booth Seven for you. I’ll meet you in there.”

  Mike blanched. “You’re gonna direct us? Don’t you have bigger projects you could be overseeing?”

  “And miss Dick’s debut with one of my brightest stars? Never. I’m expecting big things. Nothing short of a mouth-watering performance will satisfy me, so you’d best give it your all.” She winked and sashayed off in the direction of Booth Seven, dragging Mike’s dropped jaw after her.

  His attention didn’t stay on her for long, though. Movement out of the corner of his eye drew his gaze to the doorway, where Josh had, in fact, walked in. As Mike watched, Josh took in the room in a sweep. His gaze lingered on the wide windows on the far wall before skipping across the sea of people hard at work. Mike thought maybe he wouldn’t notice him, tucked away in a cubicle like the other buzzing bees, but unerringly, Josh’s beautiful eyes rested on him.

  When did I start describing his eyes that way?

  Before he could think of an answer, Josh approached him. “Hi.”

  “Hi.” Mike gave him a once-over. “You look well.”

  “Good, because I feel like I’m going to be sick.”

  “Nervous?”

  “Oh yeah.” He smiled. “But excited too.”

  “Glad to hear it.” Mike studied him. Beneath the steady fluorescent lights, he was able to pick out details about Josh’s appearance that he hadn’t noticed before, like the couple of whiskers he’d missed when shaving, or how his eyelashes were a shade darker than his hair. “Welcome to the third floor. That means you made it, more or less.”

  “Thanks. Though I gotta admit, this isn’t what I was expecting.” Josh looked around. “Doesn’t look like a porn set to me.”

  “This building used to be a recording studio, but Colette scooped it up decades ago and turned it into Murmur Inc. The office area, as you can see, is where the phone sex operators work.” He pointed at the booths that lined the walls, all of which had opaque glass and red “live” lights outside the doors. “Filming takes place in those booths when it’s not on location. They’ve been cleared out and made into individual sets. They’re bigger inside than they look.”

  “Wow. I’d love to see one.”

  Mike shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “You’re in luck. We’re about to head into one right now.”

  Josh jerked his head toward him. “‘We’?”

  “Yeah.” He swallowed. “Colette assigned me to work with you.”

  There was a pregnant pause.

  “So, you’re gonna be my first?”

  Mike winced. “Don’t say it like that. It sounds all—” He waved a hand. Sexy.

  “Oh, sorry.” Josh looked anything but. Mike swore his eyes were actually sparkling with mischief. “Let’s go, then.” He turned away.

  “Wait.” Mike grabbed his shoulder, which was a huge mistake. Josh was warm and firm beneath his fingers. He snatched his hand back like he’d been burned. “We should go over some things first. I’m supposed to be mentoring you, right?”

  “Right.” Josh licked his lips. “Teach me.”

  Oh, that’s just unfair.

  Mike cleared his throat. “When you get in there, you have to be professional at all times. No fucking around, no bad jokes, and most of all, remember what we’re here to do.” His mouth was dry as he said the next part. “We’re going to have sex, yeah, but this is a job. You’re at work, and you need to act like it.”

  “Does that mean I’m not allowed to enjoy it?”

  Heat rushed through Mike’s body before he could rein it in. He managed to keep his facial features from so much as twitching. “You can, and if I have anything to say about it, you will. But that’s a by-product of the industry, okay?”

  Are you talking to him or yourself?

  “Right. Good advice.” Josh smiled. “Thanks, Sean.”

  Mike’s stomach lurched. That didn’t sound right at all. He took a quick peek around. No one was paying the slightest attention to them. He blurted out, “It’s Mike.”

  Josh blinked. “What’s Mike?”

  “Me, smart-ass. My name’s Mike.” Christ, why am I telling him this? The newbie probably won’t understand the significance.

  “Oh.” Josh’s eyebrows pinched together, which suggested he had an inkling after all. “Wow. Okay. Hi, um, Mike.” He looked like he was struggling with words. �
��Downstairs, Colette said porn stars have to be careful with their real names. Why’d you tell me yours?”

  I’d love to know that as well. He shrugged. “It . . . seemed like the right thing to do.”

  “Because you know my real name?”

  Mike seized onto that like a lifeboat bobbing next to the Titanic. “Yeah, that’s it. Now we’re even.” He glared at him. “But don’t you dare tell anyone. Not your priest. Not your mother. Not anyone. Capiche?”

  Josh nodded, eyes grave. He seemed sincere enough. Mike expected a wave of panic to hit him any second now, but for some reason, he believed Josh would keep his secret.

  “C’mon. We can’t keep Colette waiting.” He headed for Booth Seven.

  Josh fell into step next to him. “Colette’s going to be there?”

  “Yup. Lucky you. She wants to oversee your debut personally.”

  “How is that lucky? She’s terrifying.”

  “Do you have any idea how many porn stars would kill to be directed by her? She’s a living legend, and she’s got the awards to prove it. For her to take time out of her day to coach a newbie . . . I can’t imagine what her motivation is.” Mike wove through the maze of cubicles to the correct door. The red light next to it was on. The crew must already be in there, setting up.

  As he reached for the door handle, Josh said, “Colette doesn’t believe in me, does she?”

  Mike paused, swilling words around in his mouth. “Honestly? No. But why would she? She’s only seen you once, and you were a nervous wreck. I’ve been working with her for a long time, and she still gives me shit when I don’t deliver a stellar performance. It’s like I said: this is a job like any other, and she’s your boss. You gotta make her happy.”

  “I’ll try.”

  “If it’s any consolation, I think you have it in you.”

  “Why?”

  Mike should lie. For both their sakes. But Josh looked so torn, he couldn’t help but encourage him. “Because that kiss we shared was one of the best I’ve ever had.”