Beautiful Mess

by Preston, Jennifer

  “Are you ogling my girl, Seb?” Cole taunted, relishing Seb’s obvious discomfort.

  “Maybe,” Seb shot back with a cocky grin. Cole immediately rushed him, tackling him to the ground. The two boys laughed as they wrestled in the sand.

  Bri stopped to admire the two shirtless hunks of man candy rolling around at her feet. She had to admit, it was pretty hot!

  “Alright, that’s enough!” Claire stomped over to the boys. “Stop acting like a couple of Neanderthals, and get up!”

  After another minute of trying to get in the last shot, the boys finally released each other and stood up, covered in sweat and sand. Bri’s pulse picked up.

  “Testosterone,” Claire muttered, shaking her head. She led a slightly reluctant Bri back to their towels.

  Cole came over and laid out next to Bri, and it was her turn to ogle him. His black board shorts hung low on his hips, exposing an awful lot of his well-defined chest and abs. That was one view she would never get tired of. Unable to stop herself, she brushed the sand off his abdomen, just wanting to touch him. She smiled when she felt his stomach contract under her hand. It seemed Cole was a little bit ticklish. He opened one eye and caught her gawking at him.

  “See something you like, Bri?” He flashed his signature cocky smile.

  “Oh, yeah,” she breathed. She tore her eyes away from his body and looked up. Desire darkened Cole’s gray eyes, and his intense gaze held her hostage. It was like she could see everything he wanted to do to her, reflected in his deep eyes. She could feel heat creeping up her cheeks, but she couldn’t look away. She was just about to grab him and pull him to her, when Claire’s voice broke in.

  “See Bri, I told you Cole would love it!”

  “Love what?” Cole turned to Claire, releasing Bri from his spell.

  “That bikini. I was the one who convinced her to get it,” Claire beamed proudly.

  Cole turned his eyes back to Bri.

  “Claire, I owe you. Big time.” His eyes traveled over Bri again. “In fact, I think I’ll owe you for the rest of my life for this.”

  “Told you,” Claire smiled triumphantly at Bri and laid back on her towel.

  “So,” Cole cleared his throat. “What do you want to do?” He still had that gleam in his eye, but at least he was trying not to look at her like he was picturing her naked. Bri shook her head. Boys.

  “Um, honestly, all I want to do right now is lay out, and read a book. I know that probably sounds boring, but it sounds like heaven to me right now.”

  “Okay. Seb and I wanted to go do a little body boarding, if that’s okay?”

  “Definitely! Go have fun!”

  “I can come get you a little later, if you want to try it?”

  “Sure, that sounds great,” she smiled at him.

  “Well then, I’ll leave you to relax.” He leaned over and placed a sultry kiss on her lips. “Try not to miss me too much,” he teased.

  “Yeah, I’ll work on that,” she quipped back. She slipped on her sunglasses and pulled out her book as Cole and Seb headed out into the waves. Claire followed suit next to her, and the girls laid in companionable silence.

  But the sun shining on Cole’s black hair, and glinting off his wet chest, made it much more difficult to concentrate on her book than Bri had planned. In fact, she spent much more time watching Cole in the water, than she did reading. Her attempt at relaxing was anything but.

  Giving up on her book, Bri stood and walked out to the water. She let the waves lap up against her ankles as she stood watching Cole. He rode a wave in, picked up his board, and strode towards her. The smug smile on his face as he approached told her that he knew she’d been watching him.

  “Couldn’t keep yourself away?” He cocked his eyebrow.

  “Technically, you were the one who came to me. I think it’s you who can’t stay away.” She trailed her finger up his chest.

  “You’re right about that,” he replied softly, stepping into her. “Take a walk with me?” Cole’s eyes held hers hungrily, and Bri nodded. Dropping his body board in the sand, he took her hand and led her down the beach. Neither of them said anything as they walked. When they were finally out of eyeshot, Cole pulled her to him and kissed her hard.

  “Sorry,” he pulled back breathlessly. “But, if I didn’t do that soon I was going to explode.”

  “Well, we can’t have that.” Bri pulled him in and kissed him back, knowing exactly how he felt. Though he was still damp from the ocean, Bri felt nothing but heat between them.

  Cole’s hands skimmed her waist, back, and arms before tangling into her hair, his desire for her consuming him. Bri let her own hands explore his exposed skin, desperate for more of him. The feel of his skin against hers made her knees weak. Cole kissed her like he would never see or touch her again, like he was trying to commit her body to memory.

  Heat and desire raced between them, building until they didn’t know anything else but each other. Somehow, Bri wasn’t sure how, they were lying on the sand, Cole beneath her as her mouth explored his neck and chest. There was a fire burning inside her that only he could quench. She felt his hands move to the tie at her back, and her heart pounded faster. They were all alone on the beach, and Bri wanted this, so badly. There was no reason to stop, no reason to hold back.

  Except one, and her mind made sure she remembered it.

  Feeling her heart crash, Bri gently reached back and moved Cole’s hands down. She didn’t stop kissing him, but she slowed her kisses, trying to reduce the tension between them. Finally managing to calm down a bit, she pulled back to look at him.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered.

  “Don’t be.” He reached up and cupped her cheek. Bri leaned into his hand and smiled sadly.

  “I shouldn’t let things get this far. It’s not fair to you.” She shook her head, dropping her eyes. “I just...”

  “Stop,” Cole said gently, but forcefully. Bri lifted her eyes back to his. “I shouldn’t let things get this far, either. I know how you feel about this, and I shouldn’t put you into these kinds of situations.” He paused a moment and smiled. “Although, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t really enjoy these minor lapses in judgment!”

  “Me, too,” Bri smiled back at him. “Though, it would be so much easier to control myself if you weren’t so damn sexy.” She kissed him lightly before rolling off him.

  “I have news for you, Ambria,” Cole helped her to her feet, then pulled her tightly against him, his face millimeters from hers. “You have me beat in the sexiness department, hands down.” He kissed her deeply, making her insides turn to jelly.

  “Maybe,” she murmured. “But you are by far the better kisser.”

  “I wouldn’t bet on that.”

  Bri laughed and turned away, heading back up the beach. She heard a tortured groan behind her, and threw a glance back at Cole, who had obviously been enjoying the view as she walked away.

  “Ambria, you’re going to be the death of me,” he shook his head, the tortured, longing look still in his eyes. He ran to her side, wrapped his arm tight around her waist, and led her back up the beach.

  Bri enjoyed the rest of her week off. On Friday, Layla insisted that they needed a girl’s night, and demanded that Bri spend the night. After doing facials, mani-pedi’s, and eating their weight in pizza and chocolate, Layla set up the air mattress on her bedroom floor for Bri, and the girls got ready for bed.

  Bouncing onto her own bed, Layla shot Bri a look.

  “So, how are things with Cole going?” she asked innocently.

  Seeing right through Layla’s casualness, Bri replied, “Fine.”

  “Oh, come on! Things have got to be better than fine,” Layla pushed.

  “What? Things are good. What else do you want me to say?”

  Heaving a huge sigh, Layla dropped all pretense of indifference.

  “You can start by giving me some of those details you’ve been keeping to yourself. Like, is Cole an amazing kisser?” He
r eyes sparkled with interest.

  Deciding she’d best get Layla off her back, Bri nodded, her cheeks blushing. “Yes, he really is.”

  “I knew it! With lips like his, how could he not be.” Layla’s eyes got a dreamy look in them. “I bet that boy knows at least fifty different ways to make a girl moan.”

  “Layla!” Bri swatted her with her pillow. “Don’t you have a boyfriend?” she teased. She would love to know what Devon would think about Layla’s fascination with Cole’s kissing prowess.

  “Of course,” Layla snapped out of her day dream. “And he is very satisfying, I assure you.”

  “Wait! Did you guys finally...?”

  “Oh! No, not yet.” Layla’s face flamed a bright red. “I told you, I’m holding out for Chris Carrabba at my wedding, remember?”

  “Of course. I think you’re smart for waiting.” Bri smiled encouragingly at her friend.

  “Yeah, well, it hasn’t been easy. What about you and Cole? You two seal the deal yet?”

  “Wow, Lay, what a romantic way to put it,” Bri quipped. “Not that it’s any of your business, but no, we haven’t.”

  “Seriously?” Layla was shocked. “You two have some serious chemistry going on. Heck, you can cut the sexual tension between you two with a knife. What’s holding you back?”

  “You mean besides the whole I’m not having sex in high school thing? Or the whole I don’t know exactly how I feel about him and don’t want to confuse everything with sex thing?”

  “You don’t know how you feel about him?” Layla asked skeptically, not buying it at all.

  “No. Unlike some of you lucky people who know exactly how you feel, for some of us it’s a little harder to figure out.”

  Layla scoffed. “Uh-huh. Okay, moving on for the moment. Yes, besides those reasons, what’s holding you back?”

  Bri sighed. “It’s not going to work out for us. I can’t imagine sharing that with Cole, and then having to say goodbye, for good.”

  “What? Why aren’t things going to work out for you two?”

  “Because, Cole is going away to Duke, and I’m staying here and going to Stanford. We both know long distance relationships like that never work, so don’t even say it.”

  Layla’s mouth dropped, and her eyes flashed in anger.

  “Did you even talk to him about Sanford?”

  “I couldn’t, Lay.” Bri dropped her eyes. “Duke has been his dream since he was a kid. I couldn’t ask him to give that up for me.”

  “Yes, you could!” Layla threw her hands up in frustration.

  “Why? Why would I do that?” Bri was starting to get angry. How selfish did Layla think she was?

  “Because you’re in love with him, you idiot!” Layla yelled.

  Bri sucked in a breath, stunned. “What?”

  “Come on, Bri, don’t even try and play dumb with me,” Layla gave her a reproachful look.

  “No. No, I’m not...”

  “Ambria,” Layla groaned. “Anyone who has seen you two together can see it. You freaking light up when he walks into the room. When you two are together, he’s the only thing you see. You gravitate towards him whenever he’s near you, and I don’t even think you know you’re doing it.” Layla grabbed Bri by the shoulders and forced Bri to look at her. “Just because you can’t admit it to yourself doesn’t mean it’s not true. And when you love someone, you are willing to take risks for them. That includes asking Cole to go to Stanford with you. Yes, he may still choose Duke. But, knowing Cole, he could say yes. He deserves the chance to make that decision for himself, at least. Don’t take that choice from him, and don’t just make it for him. Don’t you two deserve a chance to be together? To be happy?”

  Bri dropped her eyes, but said nothing.

  “How can Cole make the right decision when he doesn’t have all the facts? It’s not fair of you to keep your feelings from him. Talk to him. Tell him how you feel. Let him decide what’s best for him.”

  Bri nodded, unable to respond.

  “Okay, I’ve said my piece. What you decide to do is up to you, and I promise not to bug you about it anymore. Now, how about we watch a movie?” Layla hopped off her bed to search her dvd collection.

  Although the girls spent the rest of the night joking and laughing, there was a small seed of sadness that had lodged itself in Bri’s heart. She knew that Layla was wrong about her and Cole, that she assumed there was more between them than there was. But she was worried that if Layla had gotten the wrong impression, could Cole have as well?

  Bri really hoped not. Because even though she wasn’t sure how she felt about Cole, she knew that she didn’t want to hurt him. Now, she was really afraid it was too late, and there wasn’t any way to avoid it.

  Chapter 27

  Putting her conversation with Layla out of her mind, Bri continued on like normal. Now that basketball season was over, and she no longer had night practices, she and Cole got to spend a lot more time together. It was something she took full advantage of. April was flying by, graduation quickly approaching, and she wanted to enjoy all the time she had left with Cole.

  Despite Layla’s insistence, Bri never asked Cole to go to Stanford with her. Duke was Cole’s dream, every bit as much as Stanford was hers, and she couldn’t take that from him. Especially when there was no guarantee they would end up together anyway. So instead of worrying about it, she savored every minute she got to spend with him.

  One Friday, Bri noticed a strange ticking noise coming from her engine. She called her dad about it, and he told her to go ahead and take it into Jimmy’s shop after school, and have him check it out. She knew that Cole had plans after school with the guys from the basketball team, and wouldn’t be done until later. So, she said goodbye to Cole in the parking lot and drove to Jimmy’s repair shop.

  “Hey there, Barracuda, what can I do for you?” Jimmy smiled as he met her outside.

  “Um, my car is making this weird ticking noise. I have no idea what the problem is,” Bri admitted, a little embarrassed.

  Jimmy popped the hood and listened for a minute.

  “Well, I have some good news, and some bad news for you.”

  “What’s the good news?” Bri asked hesitantly.

  “You’re just running low on oil. When was the last time you had your oil changed?”

  “Oh, my gosh,” heat flooded Bri’s face. “I’ve been so busy lately, I totally forgot. It’s definitely been awhile.”

  “No problem. I’ll pull it in and have the guys get working on it for you. It won’t take long.”

  “Okay, great! Thanks.” Bri started walking towards the lobby. “Oh, Jimmy?” she turned back. “What was the bad news?”

  “The bad news is that Cole isn’t here to help us. He would’ve gotten a kick out of this!” Jimmy winked at her and pulled her car into the bay. Bri walked into the lobby, utterly embarrassed, and waited by the counter. Jimmy walked back in a minute later, smiling and shaking his head. Bri’s embarrassment level went up another notch.

  “I seriously can’t believe I did that,” she laughed. “I’m not usually such an airhead.”

  “Aw, you’re a teenage girl... it happens.”

  “Yeah, but I’m a teenage girl who loves cars. I watch Top Gear. I should so know better!”

  Jimmy laughed.

  “Just please don’t tell Cole about this. I’d never hear the end of it,” she laughed.

  “Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. Not that I’ve seen much of him lately.” Jimmy eyed Bri knowingly, causing her to blush. “And when he is home, he’s holed up in his room painting. He’s got the senior art show coming up in two weeks, and he’s obsessing over every little detail.”

  “Knowing Cole, I’m sure whatever he puts up there will be amazing. Everything he does is amazing,” she smiled.

  “Only since you came along,” Jimmy smiled. At Bri’s confused look, he continued. “Don’t get me wrong, Cole has always been talented, whether it was art, or basketball,
or football. But since he met you, he’s gone from great to exceptional. I think part of it is that he’s showing off, trying to impress you.” He winked.

  “Well, it worked,” Bri replied, shyly.

  “But I think the other part of it is that with you, Cole is able to fully be himself. He doesn’t have to hold back, or suppress anything. You don’t expect him to be anything other than who he is, and because of that he can do what he wants to do. Instead of doing what everyone else, myself included, wants.”

  Bri was stunned by this new insight into Cole. She hadn’t realized she’d had such an impact on him.

  “In fact, I think that’s why he loves you so much.”

  “What?” Bri gasped, her head shooting up.

  Seeing Bri’s shocked expression, Jimmy smiled.

  “Haven’t figured that out yet? Knowing Cole, he hasn’t said anything, either.” He laughed.

  Panic flooded Bri, and her face paled. This couldn’t be happening. As Bri’s shocked silence continued, Jimmy started looking uncomfortable.

  “Shoot, I’m sorry Bri. I didn’t mean to upset you. I thought you knew. Hell, anyone who sees you two can tell. Please, don’t tell Cole I said anything. He’ll never speak to me again if he knows I told you.”

  “But... what if I don’t...,” she stammered. “What if I can’t...” She shook her head. “I don’t want to hurt him,” her eyes finally focused on Jimmy again.

  “Bri, it’s okay,” he smiled sympathetically at her. “It’s not like Cole is going to profess his love tonight. He’s still trying to come to terms with this, and what it means for him. You see, when Cole’s mom left he saw how much it affected me, what a mess I became. Because of that, I think he came to see love as something that would only end up hurting him, destroying him. So Cole has kept himself closed off, never allowing himself to get too close or too attached to anyone. Until you. You’ve changed things for him, and he’s still trying to figure everything out. It’s not easy for him, and it’s going to take some time, but he’ll get there. He loves you too much not to.”