by Ivory Quinn
“That’s it?” He demanded gleefully? “Oh Red, you really are so innocent. That’s not so bad. Storm must peg three or four guys a week. I thought it was going to be something really terrible.”
“But he screams.” She frowned.
“And? We make people scream all the time.” He shook his head, fond amusement sparkling in his chocolate eyes.
“It’s not funny, Blue.” Angry, she withdrew from him. “It’s rape.”
Realising how distressed she was, he settled down. “Yes, Red. It’s rape. But how is it any different to what he did to you?” Her mouth opened and closed as she tried to answer. “Did he tie you down? Did you say no? Did you cry and moan because it hurt?”
“But I had a safe word.” She whispered.
“Yeah, and he totally mind-fucked you into refusing to use it.” Blue shook his head. “It’s no different, Red. You went into that play room for all the wrong reasons and he knew it. He knew it. Don’t make excuses for him.”
“It was different!” Stung, she tried to pull away from him, but the cage of his arms might as well have been forged of steel.
“It’s no different, Red. Deep down you know that.”
“He wouldn’t do that to me.” She’d gone white. “He loved me.”
“In his own twisted way he probably did, but don’t make the mistake of applying a rational framework to his capacity for love.” Blue ran a wet hand through his hair, leaving it sticking up in gleaming tufts. “You have to let go of this rose-tinted view you have of him. He manipulated you, he hurt you and he came pretty fucking close to destroying you. You don’t have to be angry with him. You don’t even have to hate him. You just have to accept it for what it is.”
“But I’m not...it’s not...he didn’t...” She trailed off, looking so lost that he took pity on her.
“Come here.” He pulled her back into his arms. “I’m sorry. I’m not trying to hurt you. I know this is all still new and raw. I just need you to understand that you’re not broken, that you can come back from this. You’re not a monster and you can and will love again.”
“I don’t know that I can do this today.” She clung to him, burying her face in his neck. “It’s too much to bear, Blue. Just too much.”
“You’re stronger than you think.” He said gently, cupping the back of her head. “You can do this. You won’t break.”
“I just want to go home and sleep.” She was shaking from the chill that was spreading deep in her bones, despite the hot water.
“Push through it.” He urged. “Come on. Let’s get you warmed up.” He rose to his feet with her still wrapped around him and stepped out of the bath, grabbing a towel. Rubbing her down briskly, he carried her to the bed and climbed in, pulling the covers up around them and curling protectively around her.
Curved into his body, she shivered and shook as ice seemed to form in her heart. Stroking her hair, he sighed deeply. “Come back to me, Red. I need you.”
“You don’t need me.” She snuffled miserably. “You’re Blue.”
“Yeah, I’m the great Master Blue.” His tone had a touch of bitterness. “Most feared Dom in the city after Master Henway himself. Well I’ve got news for you, cupcake. It’s lonely at the top and I don’t know what it is about you, but I’ve been captivated since the moment you walked through the door yesterday. You’re like a small taste of sweetness in my messed up world and I’ll be damned if I’m going to lose you now.”
“I’m not sweet.” She hid her face in his chest.
“Yes you are. You’re so shy - that’s really sweet. And the way your giggles just bubble up out of your chest – that’s sweet too. You have this really sweet smile, like you want to grin like a loon but you don’t want anyone to see, so you keep it in your eyes.” He sighed a happy sigh. “You smell sweet. You even taste sweet.”
“Blue!” She nudged him at the last one, the corners of her mouth trying to turn up.
“Well you do.” He shrugged. “I don’t lick just anyone, you know.”
“I’m so glad to hear it.” She snorted.
“You’re tiny too.” He continued, then frowned. “Actually, I guess that’s more cute than sweet.”
“I’m not that small.” She protested, finally lifting her face. “You’re just giant sized. Everyone must seem tiny to you.”
“Oh come on...you must be all of five foot and a shadow in six inch heels.” He teased.
“I’m five foot two in flats.” She poked him.
“No way.” He mocked. “I don’t believe you. Anyway, shut up. This is my list. Stop arguing with me.” He covered her mouth with his hand. “You have these ridiculously cute little hands.” He told her. “So tiny and delicate. I had some less than sweet dreams about your hands last night.” He winked at her and muffled laughter sounded from beneath his grip, even though she rolled her eyes. “Oh it’s true.” His grin was wicked. “Seriously. You should have seen them wrapped around my cock. One hand alone couldn’t go all the way around. And the difference in colour...” He made a soft noise. “...that creamy skin of yours against the darkness of mine. It was fucking hot.” He sighed. “Red, why are you turning me on? I really haven’t got time to fuck you today. Besides, we should probably cool it after yesterday if we want to maintain our friend status. Is there some rule for the frequency of benefits in the whole friends with benefits scenario?”
She tried to say something, but he didn’t move his hand.
“And now you’ve turned me on and sidetracked me.” He shook his head. “You’re a bad girl, Red. I was doing really well with my list.” He propped his head up on one hand and looked down at her. “You’re really sweet when you get irritated. Your skin goes a couple of shades pinker and you get a tiny little crease where you scrunch your nose, even though you don’t realise you’re doing it. It’s like someone aggravated a teeny tiny little fairy. It’s really sweet how you walk in heels. You take these dainty little steps like you’re just floating about on a little cloud of pink candyfloss bubbles.”
She mumbled something, curling her hands around his wrist to try and uncover her mouth.
“It’s also kind of sweet how you keep on trying even when you’re going to lose.” He grinned. “Have I proved my point yet?” He didn’t move his hand. “I’m so glad you agree. And what’s that?” He leaned down, pressing his ear to the back of his hand as she tried not to get the giggles. “You think I should lick you now? Oh well...if you insist.”
Switching hands, he moved down her body, tickling her with his tongue as she wriggled and laughed, trying to get away from him. He teased her until she was breathless and then came up, smiling. She said something muffled and he finally removed his hand.
“What was that?”
“No more, please.” She gasped, her eyes watering from all the laughing.
“Okay, I’ll have mercy.” He rolled away to sit on the edge of the bed. “Get up then, lazy bones. We’ve got a sub to torment.”
“Are you going to make me wear that corset again?” She levered herself across the bed to sit beside him. “I swear I’ve still got bruised ribs from yesterday.”
“Nope, no corset today.” His eyes twinkled with mirth. “I’ve got something far less constrictive for you this afternoon.”
“I’m not so sure I like the sound of that.” She pulled the comforter from the end of the bed and wrapped it around herself as she followed him to the wardrobe.
“It’ll be fine. And this?” He gestured at the blanket. “This misplaced modesty is really sweet.”
“It’s hardly misplaced.” She elbowed him in the ribs. “I know it’s been a slightly unconventional start to our friendship, but I did only just meet you yesterday.”
He tutted, shaking his head. “Putting out before the first date. Shocking.”
“You’re lucky you’re so big.” She narrowed her eyes at him. “If you were my size I’d take you down a peg or two.”
“Any time you want to try...” He grinned so broa
dly that little dimples appeared in his cheeks and Noelle was dazzled all over again by him. She didn’t think she’d ever understand how she’d landed in this world of gorgeous men with elemental personalities.
“I’ll get you when you’re least expecting it.” She warned and he ruffled her hair fondly.
“I’ll look forward to it, Little Monkey.” He reached down a coat hanger with some scraps of leather on and handed it to her. “Hold these a sec.” She studied them dubiously as he took out several larger pieces of leather for himself.
“I’m not entirely sure what this is, but I can almost guarantee I’m not going to fit into it.” She poked a moulded section.
“We’ll try. If it doesn’t work, I’ll raid Storm’s wardrobe for something else.” He shrugged easily, pushing the wardrobe doors closed. “Easy fixed.”
He slid into a pair of dark brown leather trousers with practiced ease, the soft and pliable material shearing to his thigh musculature like a second skin. Noelle had thought Gabriel looked amazing in leather. He had nothing on Blue. Nothing. The rich brown contrasted with Blue’s bronze skin, making him seem like some forest god come to life to walk amongst the mere mortals.
“When you’re done staring...” He said softly and she jerked her gaze away, blushing furiously as he chuckled.
“Let me guess, if I say you look hot you’ll tell me I should see the loin cloth?” She sniped and he shrugged, sending muscles rippling all across his shoulders in the most mesmerising fashion.
“The loin cloth does look good.” He mocked. “Your turn. Drop the blanket.”
Sighing, she pulled the blanket from around her body and folded it neatly, laying it on the bed. “You’re not very good at preparing the whole ritual thing.” She said as he began to dress her. “I’m pretty sure getting dressed by you isn’t going to appear anywhere in my ritual when I’m doing this on my own.”
“Not by me, no, but it depends on the kind of relationship you want to end up in.” He pulled a tiny scrap of lace up around her hips. “If you’re in a committed relationship with a sub, he or she can dress you as part of the ritual. It’s personal preference.” He reached for a skirt.
“No stockings today?” She asked and he shook his head, lifting her ankles one by one into the tiny band of leather that was barely going to cover her rear.
“No need. They’ll just ladder.”
“Oh.” The skirt was ridiculously small and she made a mental note not to bend down, even slightly. “What’s your ritual when you’re not training?”
“I bathe in the special bath salts. Then I dress. Then I spend a few minutes in contemplation.” He shrugged. “It used to be more elaborate, but as time has passed I can slip into Master mode in the time it takes to think it. I don’t need it any more. It’s just habit.”
“It must be like how Gabriel used to get ready for shows.” She mused aloud. “He got very quiet and intense and demanding ahead of the gig at New Year. His demons were rolling in him all night.”
“A lot of people do it.” He dropped the loop of a tiny leather halter neck top over her head. “Musicians, sports stars, politicians...it’s all the same process. We’re all getting in the zone. It’s just that our zones are worlds apart.” The top was backless apart from some elaborate lacing and her eyes widened as he started pulling it tight.
“Blue, I can’t wear this.” She grimaced at her chest. “It was designed for a less well-endowed lady.”
“Just let me finish and then I’ll see.” Unperturbed, he continued to pull the laces.
“Blue, I look like I’ve got an arse on my chest. If you give me any more cleavage, you’d be able to park a bike in it.”
He dissolved into laughter at her turn of phrase, almost letting go, and he was still chuckling when he finally turned her around to face him. “Oh!” He breathed, a look of raw appreciation flooding his features as the laughter was instantly forgotten.
“Oh what?” She stared up at him. “I look ridiculous.”
He shook his head vehemently. “No, Red. That’s not ridiculous. Not even close. That’s...” He trailed off, staring at her chest where the deep V of the top was bursting at the seams with her breasts. They had been forced high and close by the tight leather. “I want to put my cock in that.” He said without thinking and she was so startled her jaw dropped.
“What?!”
“It looks so soft and inviting.” Like he was hypnotised, he raised a hand to press his fingers into the crease between her breasts.
“Blue, get a grip!” She didn’t know whether to laugh or cringe at his astonishment. “There’s somebody coming, remember?” She backed up so his hand dropped away and he finally snapped out of it.
“Sorry.” Without the slightest trace of embarrassment, he went in search of shoes for her, returning a few moments later with a pair of soft suede knee-high boots. They were a bit tight, but easy enough to walk in. Noelle wanted to feel ridiculous, but there was something about the press of leather on her skin that made her feel sexy. It was warm and pliable and exotic. The heels on the boots tilted her hips provocatively in the tiny skirt and Blue’s warm regard was certainly making her feel foxy.
They barely had time to read the file before Thomas was being shown into the room and they stood to meet him. He was a lot younger than Noelle had imagined, barely into his twenties, and slim.
“Thomas, this is Mistress Red.” Blue introduced them. The submissive turned to Noelle and his jaw dropped. He just stood there and gaped, his mouth opening and closing soundlessly as he tried to take her in.
“Nice to meet you too.” She said drily.
“Thomas, you are being rude.” Blue’s voice oozed impending violence and Thomas flinched.
“Mistress Red.” He tore his eyes away and dropped to his knees before her, kissing her hand. “Forgive me.” Startled, Noelle looked at Blue and he nodded, just once.
“Don’t do it again.” She said sternly and Thomas nodded.
“No Mistress, I won’t.” Careful to avoid looking at her, he rose slowly to his feet and took the chair Blue indicated.
They went through the same process as the day before, running through the checklists. Thomas seemed agitated and restless as he sat there and Noelle watched him with curiosity. He might have his addiction under control but he was certainly jonesing for a ‘fix’. His fingers were twitching and every now and then his body would jerk uncontrollably as though his strings were being yanked on by an invisible puppeteer. When Blue said he could go and prepare, he shot out of the room with a garbled thank you and was gone before either could reply.
“Is he always like that?” Noelle turned to Blue.
“He’s always jittery when he comes in. He’ll be a lot calmer when he leaves.” Blue seemed pensive. “It’s hard for him to wait two weeks. Sometimes I have to fit him in for emergency sessions when he’s had a really hard time. He doesn’t cope with stress very well. It’s kind of sad in a way. Despite his issues, he’s a hopeless romantic and it always hits him hard when the girls he meets can’t cope with his condition.”
“Can’t he have a normal sexual relationship without pain? I thought it said online that most algolagniacs could?”
“He can.” Blue nodded. “But that’s not what puts people off. I ride him hard, Red. He goes home covered in welts and blisters and some of them take several days to go down. That’s hard for people to take. Imagine how you’d feel if Jax came home with raw skin again and again, and kept going back for more. They always try to talk him out of it. He hasn’t yet met a woman that genuinely understands.”
“Why doesn’t he date someone like me or you?” She asked, frowning. “If he was with a dominant, he could get what he needs at home.”
“Because he doesn’t want to be collared. He doesn’t want it to be his lifestyle. He wants to be like Karen – a normal loving relationship at home and sessions when he needs them. There’s no-one better than him to judge how close to the edge he is and he doesn’t need a do
minant in his life deciding when and where he needs to be hurt. He’s managing an addiction and it’s something he can’t have anyone else interfering with.”
“It sounds lonely.”
“It is. But he’s a smart kid and he’ll figure it out.” He got to his feet and held his hand out to her. “Let’s go. It’s not fair to keep him waiting.”
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m so surprised about how you have this softer side.” She allowed him to help her up. “I guess, like everyone else, I had these misconceptions about doms. I thought you were all ball-busting bastards.”
“We’re just regular people.” He shrugged, sending all those muscles rippling again. She tried not to watch them and failed miserably. “I think that’s why people struggle when they come into this lifestyle initially. It is hard at first because the misconceptions are so ingrained in the public psyche.” He took her hand as they strolled slowly towards the play room. “It’s not easy to overturn concepts that you were brought up with. Change doesn’t happen overnight. It’s even harder to challenge the public misconceptions. Everywhere you look in popular media, dominants are caricatures of freaks. It’s what people want to believe. It’s like porn in a lot of ways – it’s not realistic. Well...” He grinned. “Mostly it’s not realistic, but it’s what people want to watch, and where sex has a lot of positive ways to combat the porn mentality, BDSM is too dark and too underground to do that. The most we can manage is mysterious and exotic and that’s completely missing the point of what we’re all about.”
“It doesn’t exactly encourage the warm and fuzzies.” She smiled, turning it over in her head. She’d been given a lot to think about and was quiet as she followed Blue into the play room.
Chapter eleven
Like Karen had been, Thomas was waiting quietly on his knees in the corner of the room. He wasn’t holding a collar, but he did have leather bands around his wrists that had steel D rings attached. When he shifted slightly, Noelle could see them on his ankles too. She wondered if it was symbolic like the collar or purely functional. Probably a mixture of both.