by CB Conwy
Matt narrowed his eyes.
"Yes, like that. Don't go all soft on me," Sam interrupted before he could say anything.
Jesus, that Himiko was annoying.
His thought must have shown on his face, because Sam grinned. "That's my boy."
***
Matt didn't stay annoyed for long; he felt a surge of compassion go through him just looking at Jerry and knowing what the Himiko had been through. He couldn't imagine losing his mate, and when Sam ordered him to use the other Himiko as his sparring partner, Matt was as careful as he could be. He pushed gently, not wanting to strain Jerry after his trainer's rough day yesterday.
He found himself lying on the ground, desperately trying to breathe. Jerry bent down over him.
"That's what happens when you let your guard down. Get a grip, Matt."
Jerry lifted him up like the Warrior had done yesterday, and Matt managed to force his lungs to work, taking one shuddering breath and then another. Jerry let go none too gently, and Matt just took a moment to breathe. When he was relatively sure he wasn't going to pass out, he sat up.
"Come on, get going." Jerry kicked his thigh. Not that hard, but not that gently, either.
Matt scowled at Jerry.
"Suck it up, princess. You'll want to be able to defend yourself against much harder attacks than that."
That took care of the compassion, and Matt got up.
Jerry kept attacking him, and Matt worked almost as hard to defend himself as he had done when he first learned how to shield. Defending himself physically should have been the same thing as defending himself mentally, but it felt completely different. Matt had gotten used to the intricacies of mental challenges, and this felt as rough as a football player in a game of bridge.
That image actually helped him. He might have gotten accustomed to using his mind only, but he could do the rough stuff, too. As soon as he realized the difference, he adjusted his defenses to match. Jerry's next attack left him standing upright, and after the next, he tried pushing back.
Jerry sat down on his ass with an "oomph."
"You let your guard down?" Matt couldn't keep from baiting Jerry.
Jerry scowled and jumped up, pushing Matt again. This attack was different, somehow twisting around and hitting him all over instead of being just a straightforward punch, but Matt didn't care. He just blocked it and pushed back at Jerry in the same move.
This time, Jerry ended upside down in a patch of blackberry bushes. He swore profoundly when he got out, picking out thorns from his hands.
"Suck it up, princess."
For a moment, Jerry looked ready to smack Matt. Then Sam roared with laughter, and he backed down, mumbling something Matt was happy to overhear. That the Himiko was disgruntled wasn't exactly a secret; the resentment oozed off him.
Sam called for a break, and he got Matt a soda while Jerry sat down on a nearby log, muttering to himself while removing the thorns. Matt was quite sure that Jerry made a show out of it; blackberry thorns weren't that hard to remove. Jerry clearly was a lot more comfortable with being rough and rude than with being subjected to pity. Lesson learned, Matt told himself.
"So," he tried to ignore Jerry's grouching, "do they teach Himika mentors to be annoying? Because the two of you suck almost as much as Aki."
Sam's face was a study in disgust. "I'm nothing like Aki!"
"Oh, you're very much like Aki. You said so yourself, yesterday. What was all that about?" Matt still didn't really understand why a Warrior was so different from other Himika -- and why Aki could be one and deny it at the same time.
Jerry had stopped muttering, listening to the conversation. He raised his eyebrows at Matt's words.
Sam exploded. "He's a fucking coward, that's what he is." He got up and stomped off.
Matt stared after him. "That didn't go down well. Shouldn't you go after him?"
"Shit, Matt, you're too fucking touchy-feely for someone as bad-tempered as you are."
"I'm not touchy-feely!" Matt was outraged. He had been accused of a lot, but never, ever that. Just the opposite, in fact, and that was how he liked it. "He's just really angry and a little worried, and I don't think he should be alone like that."
Jerry groaned. "Your mental powers are as over-developed as a bodybuilder's biceps, Matt. Just let him be, will you? He'll lose any trace of manly dignity if I go after him to hold his hand."
Matt had to take a deep breath to keep himself in control. What was it with these guys and their pissing contests?
"We're Warriors, Matt!"
Matt didn't realize he had said it out loud, but he must have; he was very, very careful to keep his mental shields up around both Sam and Jerry.
"And that's another word for being obnoxious?"
Jerry looked about to smack him again. Then he suddenly relaxed and grinned. "Yeah, I think it is."
The imminent danger of getting punched in the face seemed to have diminished enough for Matt to sit back. He got Jerry a soda, and the Himiko accepted it. At least Jerry didn't hold a grudge.
"So, tell me about Sam and Aki." He had begun to like these stories; it was like a mixture of a history lesson and really good gossip.
"Not much to tell." Jerry shrugged. "The Himiko who killed Stor? Aki was close to him. They weren't exactly friends, but they were sort of on the same side, if there were any sides at all back then."
"And that's why you don't like each other?" It was a loss less dramatic than Matt had expected.
"No, we don't like each other because Aki realized what he could do that day and has spent every waking moment since then preaching about Warrior powers being evil. His own powers."
"Uh, sorry to ruin your analysis, but wasn't that the only sane thing to do?" Somebody had died, after all.
"That's like saying breathing is really dangerous because you risk hyperventilating. This is how we are!" Jerry jumped up, seeming too agitated to stay sitting. "You can't change your powers. If anything, things get worse if you repress them instead of learning how to control them. And you can't repress them. Just look at the way you almost killed yourself trying to learn how to move water."
"I did not almost kill myself! I just got a little... tired."
"Yes, but that's only because you're too fucking stubborn to react like a normal Himiko would have reacted." Jerry took a deep breath before he continued. "Point is that Aki's been refusing to acknowledge that Warrior powers even exist. Sam doesn't like that. I don't care much for it, either."
Matt didn't have a problem believing that. He just didn't have any time for intrigues and hurt feelings anymore. "I have a Himiko to put out of action; you'll have to get over it. Go get Sam and tell him to get his ass back here."
Jerry didn't exactly look happy, but he did it, leaving Matt to think.
Jesus, this was a mess. First the Himika, represented by Pietr and Robbie, had turned out to be friendly. Then the aliens turned out to be less so when the Assessor entered the equation. And now even the good guys hated each other.
Jerry came back with a still scowling Sam, and Matt got up, arms crossed.
"Is he really that bad?"
Sam looked uncomprehendingly at him.
"Aki! Do you really hate him that much?"
"He was so fucking self-righteous after the battle, and he..."
Matt interrupted him. "Not then, now. Do you really hate him now?"
Sam looked a little surprised, as if the hatred had become second nature to him. "I... He's still annoying."
"Yes. So are you. That doesn't make me hate you." Okay, a little, sometimes. But it was over when the lesson ended.
"Why do you even care, by the way?"
Matt raised his eyebrows. "Because I need to know that I can trust you. I can't have you bickering behind my back while I try to defeat the Assessor."
Sam looked outraged, but it was Jerry who stepped forward. "We promise. He's annoying as hell, but we can thin
k that and still be on the same side."
Matt decided to ignore the rebellious expression on Sam's face. "Good. Now, let's continue."
***
He trained the rest of the day and the next, and he slowly started to master the new techniques. Sam taught him how to control the physical attacks and then went to mental attacks. Those were both easier and harder. Easier, because it was a lot like his first training. And a lot harder, because he wasn't just controlling his own mind -- he actually had to attack someone else's mind.
It was strange and more than a little unsettling to use his power against another living being. Hitting somebody physically was one thing, but when you struck someone mentally, you felt their shock and pain. It was disgusting. Matt had no idea how the Himiko warriors had been able to endure it.
He practiced on Jerry; the Himiko had grumbled something about having so little brain left that it didn't matter if Matt wrecked the rest of it. Matt didn't, but he pushed and pulled and shoved enough to get a very good grasp of how to do that. Of how to hurt somebody, if he really wanted to. It was enough to give Jerry a throbbing headache, and at the end of each day, Matt insisted that Robbie use some Tylenol and a little of the doctor's healing powers on Matt's victim.
Aki did hover a little bit while Robbie worked his magic, but Matt noticed that Sam kept his mouth shut about it. It was quite admirable if you considered how much animosity had been between the two of them until recently. Or maybe Sam was just growing up.
Sam growled, and Matt cursed. What was it with him and speaking out loud these days? He never did that.
"What?" Aki looked enquiringly at him.
Matt decided to jump right into it. "Sam has decided to be civil. He might not hate you as much as he thought he did, but he's not ready to admit that yet."
Smooth, baby.
Shut up, Pietr.
Sam sputtered, and Aki looked slightly bewildered. "Okay?"
Matt gestured at him. "Now it's your turn to say something heartfelt."
Aki looked more ill at ease than ever. But he seemed to recognize Sam's effort. "I might not hate him, either?"
The very audible question mark ruined the statement somewhat, but Matt didn't think this was the time to be fussy.
"Great. Now shake hands and promise me you won't kill each other when I'm not looking."
Jerry's mouth twitched slightly as he got up from where he lay on the couch.
Next to him, Robbie was hiding his head, looking down at his bag. Even if Matt couldn't have felt how the doctor was laughing his ass off, he could still see Robbie's shoulders shake.
To their credit, Aki, Pietr, Sam, and Jerry obediently shook each other's hands. It made it all seem a little like a playground in a kindergarten.
That would make Matt the diplomatic kindergarten teacher, though.
Pietr only barely managed to contain his snort at that thought. You're so not the diplomatic type, honey.
***
That night, Matt was exhausted. Not so much physically, even though his body was worn out, too. But the struggle to concentrate as intensely as he had to do in order to master the new skills was beginning to take its toll. Not to mention the fact that he was actually hurting someone he had started to care a great deal for.
You're doing it for the right reasons, baby.
Matt shrugged. He knew that, and it didn't help.
Let's go for a walk.
Matt was a little surprised; Pietr's absurd fear of North American wildlife still kept him inside most of the time. Matt let Pietr guide him, though, and his mate put an arm around his shoulder, steering him toward the oak. An image of the lake came to Pietr's mind.
It was a quiet evening, the sun going down late this time of year. It wasn't as warm as it had been during the day, but it was still beautiful, a gentle wind going through the trees while they walked. Matt could feel how the tranquility of the surroundings slowly spread to him, enabling him to breathe a little easier than he had for a while. Pietr gently rubbed his shoulder.
They were quiet as they left the wood behind them and stepped into the open next to the lake. In an hour or so, the place would be teeming with mosquitoes, but right now, it was as serene as Matt remembered it.
Come on, let's sit down.
Matt followed his mate and sat down in the grass. It reminded him of the last time they had been there, and he felt a little guilty when he remembered his mate's distress after Matt had shut him out. Matt hadn't thought about anything other than his own problems lately.
Pietr actually laughed at him.
So, now you're beating yourself over the head with that? Really, Matt, isn't it enough that you have to save the world from an evil alien?
Jesus. Yeah, when you put it that way... There really isn't any other option, right? I'm not just going to do this because it's easier than using a stun gun or something like that?
You can't really use weapons against a strong Himiko.
Why not? Matt had all kinds of images in his head of creating physical shields like the mental shields he already made.
I guess somebody really strong might do that. But that isn't the main reason why it doesn't work. It's just really difficult to surprise a mind reader, and using a weapon demands preparation. Even drawing a gun would take long enough to reveal your intention, and he would defeat you.
Matt felt a little stupid.
Don't. The Assessor is stronger than anybody. I'm not even sure how much he can do.
So he could just as well kill me the moment he sees me? Matt went cold with fear.
No. I don't think that's likely.
Only the firm conviction in Pietr's mind kept Matt from calling this whole thing off. He was a little surprised at being this affected by the thought of harming someone. He had a temper, and he had always thought of himself as a cold bastard.
Luckily, you aren't.
It doesn't seem that way. At least I don't have to kill him.
Pietr hugged him. Nobody would ask that of you. That would be cruel.
And Pietr wasn't cruel. In spite of what Pietr had done, the Himiko wasn't evil.
Does it make a difference? Pietr's inner voice was still filled with self-hatred.
Yes. It does. It's the difference between harming the Assessor because I don't like him or disagree with him -- and doing it because it's the right thing to do. The only thing to do. It might not be an easy choice, but it's the only possible thing to do.
I'm going to change a lot of things when the Assessor's gone. Pietr was determined to make up for what he had done.
I can't ask for any more. Come on, let's get back.
***
The next morning, Sam took one look at Matt and said, "This isn't going to work. You're too tired."
Matt protested, but Sam was adamant.
"But we only have a few days left!"
"Yes, and that's far too little time for you to recover if you overdo it. Take a break today."
Matt felt rebellious, but there was nothing to do, and he went back to the cabin. Robbie was there, bent over the computer.
"Did you find out any more about the demonstration?"
Robbie looked up, rubbing his eyes.
"Not really -- except that it's going to be big. I tried to find out if the Assessor's got any support apart from Sam and Jerry and our mates, but it doesn't seem like it. Nobody else is attending the meeting, at least."
"That sounds like really dangerous research." Matt kept to speaking out loud. Sam had been right; he really was tired.
Robbie shrugged. "It would have been if I'd been sneaking around, poking at Himiko brains. But I used this." He turned the computer to Matt. Instead of some web page, the screen was filled with letters and numbers in different windows.
"You're hacking them?" Matt felt his eyebrows go up; Robbie never stopped surprising him.
Robbie blushed a little. "I'm not that good at it. And it is illegal."
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"But extremely handy."
Robbie began to shut down the computer. "You need to eat, though; you look tired. Let me get you something."
Matt sighed and resigned himself to taking the day off. Having both Robbie and Sam nagging him was too much, even for someone as mulish as he was.
***
Lunch was good, and it was even better to sit down around the table with Pietr, Aki, and Robbie. When Matt looked out of the window, he could see Sam and Jerry out there.
They seemed to be deep in conversation; Jerry was actually talking, which was rare. Sam was listening intently, and then he put an arm over the other Himika's shoulder. Jerry didn't do anything to pull away.
"He'll be okay, Matt."
Matt looked up in surprise; he had been caught up in watching his teachers.
"He's been through a lot. If that didn't kill him, then neither will your practicing a little on him." Aki sounded very certain. And a lot less hostile toward the other Warrior than he had been before.
I think you'd make an excellent kindergarten teacher, Matt. Pietr's inner voice was as dry as ever, and Matt had to make an effort to hide his laugh.
"Apart from that, I think Sam's going to start using all three of us tomorrow," Aki continued. That made Matt prick up his ears.
"To practice on you?"
Aki looked at him with consternation on his face. "No, Matt. To practice with us."
"Oh. Sorry." It seemed his mentor didn't like the thought of being a guinea pig.
"You have to learn how to use our combined power. Preferably without killing any more doors." They all automatically looked at the kitchen door that they hadn't had time to fix yet.
I really need to get rid of the evidence when I do stuff like that.
Pietr just laughed at him.
"You don't exactly seem concerned about tomorrow?" Aki looked questioningly at him.
"Should I be?"
Robbie looked chidingly at his mate. "Of course you shouldn't."