Hearing Voices

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Hearing Voices Page 19

by E. C. Bell


  I didn’t know whether that was good or bad. I sat down beside her, touched the stone tentatively, and felt a small bit of happiness when it rocked back and forth.

  “What are you going to do with the stone?” I asked.

  “I’m going to club Julius Rafferty with it,” she replied.

  “Oh.” That stopped the conversation for a while. She didn’t speak because she was gathering her strength, and I didn’t speak because I didn’t know how to respond. Then I had an honest to God idea. “Maybe you don’t need a weapon,” I said. “Because it takes most of your strength just to carry that thing around. Right?”

  “Right. But if I don’t use the rock, what can I use?” she asked. Her light was coming back surprisingly quickly.

  “Well, you got your hands,” I said. “And your feet. Punching and kicking might do the trick.”

  “Maybe,” she said. Then she smiled. “And I got teeth,” she said. “I could do some real damage with my teeth.”

  “Too true,” I said, though I believed that punching the hell out of someone would do more damage that just biting them. “Maybe practice it all. You know, so you’re ready.”

  “All right,” she said. She grunted as she hiked herself back to standing as though her body weighed a ton. Which it didn’t, of course, since she was just a representation of herself. She pointed at me, once she was standing. “You too,” she said.

  “Oh, come on,” I whined, “I got no reason to learn this stuff.” I was content to lie on the ground and play with the rock she’d abandoned. My exhaustion had pretty much dried up my good will. Besides, I’d taught Phillipa everything I knew.

  “Get up,” she snapped. “We’re both gonna get so good at this, we’ll be unstoppable.”

  I didn’t like the sound of that, but decided to go along, just to keep the peace. “All right,” I said. “I’m coming.”

  This was way too much work, this helping people. But then I thought of Marie, trapped in this place like we all were. She was willing to help Phillipa, even though Phillipa didn’t want her help. Maybe I needed to help her. Maybe I could help her.

  I scrambled to my feet and reached down. Touched the rock Phillipa had been lugging around, and then, with a grunt, hoisted it into the air. I stumbled a step or two and then dropped it with a thud, but didn’t give up. Just grabbed the thing, wrapped it in my light and lifted it to shoulder height.

  “Look at me!” I cried. “I’m doing it!”

  Phillipa was standing by a wooden post that made up the mostly decorative fence that surrounded the pasture.

  “Phillipa, look!” I cried again. I could feel my hands shaking, and knew the rock wasn’t going to stay in the air for very much longer, but I wanted to prove to her that I could be as strong as she was. Stronger even. “I’m actually holding up the rock!”

  Phillipa turned and spat out the chunk of wood she had in her mouth. “Nice,” she said. “I knew you could do it.”

  Then she turned back to the post, and bit it again. Chewed it like it was popcorn, and I watched chunks fly everywhere. In spite of myself, I was impressed.

  Maybe she was right. Maybe her teeth were enough.

  Marie:

  Sylvia’s Back, with More Bad News

  I THOUGHT I was going to have an early night because Parkerson was away at her conference or whatever, but just as I’d stretched out on my bed, Nurse Melodie walked into my room.

  “You have a visitor,” she said. There was no smile anywhere on her face, and for a second, I wondered if Otto was right about her. That she was the bad nurse. Without the smile, she was scary looking. No doubt about it.

  I stood and without being told, grabbed my brush and brushed my hair. “Who is it?” I asked.

  “That police officer,” she replied. Still no smile, even though the hair brush was in action. “She says she has more questions for you.”

  “Oh,” I said, and put the brush down. What I wanted to do was jump for frigging joy, because I had a fair bit to tell her. None of it had to do with the guy I’d supposedly attacked, but good old “scary without her smile” Nurse Melodie didn’t need to know that.

  “Yes,” Nurse Melodie said. “And after you’re finished with her, I think you and I need to have a little talk ourselves.”

  “About what?” I asked.

  “About the incident in the rec area,” she replied. “About Otto, and what you said to him.”

  Damn. Looked like Otto spilled the beans about me quizzing them about the people on James’s bad guy list.

  “I was just watching them play Monopoly,” I said.

  “We’ll talk,” she said, her eyes like ice. “Later. Put on your housecoat. The officer is waiting.”

  I grabbed my housecoat, pulled it on, and then followed Nurse Melodie out of my room and down the hallway to the room that Sergeant Worth and I had used before. Good. I was fairly certain that there was no videoing going on there, and we could still speak freely.

  Funny that I thought I could speak to Sylvia Worth more freely than my shrink, but I could. After all, she knew about the ghosts. And she believed, which helped immensely.

  She was sitting at the small table and gestured at the chair opposite her as I walked into the room. She looked upset, which made my stomach clench.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked.

  She shook her head once and glanced at the door. Nurse Melodie hadn’t closed it. In fact, it looked like she was thinking of keeping it open just a crack, so she could listen to our conversation. I walked over to the door, and slammed it, hard.

  “There,” I said. “Situation handled. Now, what’s wrong?”

  “Sit down,” she said. “You don’t look good.”

  “I’m fine,” I said. “Hell, I even brushed my hair and everything. Just tell me what’s wrong.”

  “Well, you know that your court case started today, didn’t you?” she asked.

  That bit of information caught me off guard, and I flopped down into my chair. “No,” I said. “I didn’t know that.”

  “Wonderful,” she said, and rubbed her hands wearily over her eyes. “They were supposed to let you know, so you could prepare. Just in case you had to testify.”

  “They told me nothing,” I said. I felt anger beginning to bubble up and took a breath to calm myself. Getting pissed would do nothing good in this situation. I needed more information, first. Then I could get pissed. “Just pumped me full of drugs. I take it things aren’t going well?”

  “Dr. Parkerson testified,” Sylvia said.

  “Oh.” They told me she was at a conference. Right. I knew they were lying. “What did she say?”

  “She said a lot,” Sylvia said. “And none of it was good.”

  “Well, we expected that, didn’t we?” I asked. “After all, she’s the reason I’m in here.”

  “I guess I thought after a few days, she’d realize that you are not a danger to anybody. But the way she talked about you—your mental health assessment and how you’ve been acting in here—makes it seem like you’re right off your rocker.” She glanced at me, an unamused smile on her face. “What have you been up to?”

  “My usual shenanigans,” I said sourly. “The drugs are really screwing me up, and the frigging ghosts aren’t helping at all. You should try investigating in here—it’s next to impossible to get a straight answer out of anyone, living or dead.”

  “Maybe you should let James handle the investigating,” Sylvia said carefully. “Until we get you out.”

  “No,” I said. “I can’t do that. Jesus, Sylvia, you wouldn’t believe what’s going on in here. Another patient died. They say it was a heart attack, but I believe she was killed.”

  “I’ll check it out,” Sylvia said, and wrote down Natalie’s name.

  “I got some information about Parkerson,” I said. “Where and when she worked, before this place. Tell James to check if anyone died at these places that might be linked to her.”

  “Will do,” she said, and han
ded me the pad of paper. I quickly wrote down what I remembered from the doctor’s CV.

  “And, there’s a guy who works here—one of those orderlies—who has been harassing the female patients.”

  “Harassing?”

  “He’s a frigging sexual predator, actually, but it was a ghost who told me her story, so . . .”

  “We’ll need corroboration from someone living,” she said. “Your usual problem.”

  “Tell me about it,” I said. “Some of the patients warned me about him, but I haven’t talked to anyone living who he has bothered yet. However, I’d bet he was doing this before he came here, so there might be a record of it somewhere. Check him out for me, will you? His name is Julius Rafferty. He’s been working here for a long time, and I think he was harassing the woman who just died.” I shrugged. “He might be more than a sexual predator. He might actually be the killer.”

  “I’ll check him out,” Sylvia said. “If there’s anything, anything at all, we’ll get him.”

  “Thank you,” I said. “How’s James handling everything?”

  “Oh, you know James,” Sylvia said. “He tries to act all macho, but he’s worried about you.” She looked at me, and half smiled. “Why didn’t you tell me you two were thinking about getting married? I would have congratulated you. Thrown a party or something.”

  I almost laughed out loud, because I’d been to Sylvia Worth’s condo and knew for a fact that she never had anyone over for a party, or anything else. But she looked so earnest, I didn’t even say anything sarcastic.

  “We haven’t made it official yet,” I said. “But maybe.”

  “Well, I’m happy for you,” she said. “You deserve a little happiness in your life.”

  “That’ll happen when I get the hell out of here,” I said. “Just tell James not to worry about me. And maybe tell him to quit telling people that we’re engaged or whatever, when it’s not official. ’Kay?”

  Her smile fell. “Will do,” she said.

  “Now,” I said. “Tell me what Dr. Parkerson said about me today.”

  “Are you sure you want to hear it?” she asked.

  “Yes,” I said. “I am so tired of being in the dark. Tell me everything.”

  “She said that she believes you are suffering from schizophrenia,” Sylvia said. “She says you have at least four indicators. She talked about you seeing ghosts. Talking to ghosts. You know, hearing them, and all that.” She shuffled in her chair and wouldn’t look at me. “She says that you’ve developed an elaborate world to explain it all—and that your family was aiding and abetting you.” She shook her head. “Those weren’t the words, exactly, but that’s what she meant. She also said that James is now doing the same thing, and that it’s dangerous for you to continue to interact with anyone who supports your delusions.” She shook her head. “She really doesn’t like the fact that you can see ghosts.”

  “Not many do,” I replied distantly. God, my shrink thought I was schizophrenic. Like Otto. “What is my lawyer going to do about it?” I asked.

  “He’s going to get people who you’ve helped to testify on your behalf,” she said. “To prove that you’re not nuts. You can just see and talk to ghosts.”

  “Does that include you?” I asked.

  “Yeah,” she said. “That includes me.”

  “This must be hard for you.”

  “No,” she said. “Actually, it’s not. You got rid of Rory for me, and you found Karen’s body. And as soon as we have the DNA evidence we’ll know who killed her so justice will finally be served. Because of you. I don’t know how you do it, but I know for a fact that you do. That’s good enough for me.”

  “And the people who are going to call you a fool or deluded for believing?” I asked. “What about them?”

  I was surprised I was even asking her that question, because until now this was all I’d wanted her to do. I’d almost convinced myself that if she’d just said something—anything—that Dr. Parkerson would have somehow been miraculously convinced, and I wouldn’t have ended up in this place. I now knew I was wrong. And I was afraid that Sylvia would hurt her career for nothing.

  “Fuck ’em,” she said shortly. “I’ll be fine. Let’s just get you out of here, shall we?”

  Her words made me feel a bit better, but I knew that Sylvia Worth testifying wasn’t going to do much to get me out of here. It sure wouldn’t convince Dr. Parkerson. Nothing would, except maybe a ghost she could see, or at the very least interact with.

  Like a poltergeist. Like Jasper, if he learned how to move more than a pencil.

  Dammit, anyhow.

  My mother would be so pissed at me for even thinking those thoughts. Maybe it was a good thing she hadn’t come back to me after she died. At least I wouldn’t embarrass her or infuriate her by going against one of her rules.

  If it got me out of here, who cared what my mother thought. Not me. Not anymore.

  WE PARTED WAYS shortly after. I was afraid Sylvia was going to try to hug me or something, but she didn’t. Just nodded and said she’d be back as soon as she had anything new for me.

  I opened the door and caught Nurse Melodie napping. That would have made me chuckle before the interview with Sylvia, but I had no humour left.

  “Thank you,” Sylvia said to me, and to the nurse. Then she walked away and was gone.

  I went to walk through the door, but Nurse Melodie pushed me back into the small room. “We’ll talk here,” she said. “Where it’s quiet.”

  “All right,” I said, even though it didn’t feel all right. Not by a long shot. I went back to the table and sat in Sylvia’s recently vacated chair. “What do you want to talk to me about?”

  “About your behaviour in the recreation area,” she said. She did not sit in my chair. Just stood over me and stared without a hint of expression on her face.

  “What about it?” I asked. “Like I said, I just wanted to watch a little television.”

  “I think you wanted to do more than that,” she replied. “What exactly were you talking to Otto about?”

  “Nothing,” I said. “All I did was ask him about some of the staff. I don’t know why he went off the way he did.”

  “Why did you want to know about the staff?” she asked. Her face tightened, and I knew that Otto had told her everything. Everything. And I was willing to bet that she’d seen the list James had given me. Had seen her name on that list. And Julius’s.

  “Because that Julius guy creeps me out,” I said. “I just wanted to know if he’d bothered anybody else around here.”

  Nurse Melodie’s eyes turned to slits as she stared at me, hard. “Are you accusing Mr. Rafferty of some impropriety?” she asked. “Because if you are, I must warn you that Dr. Parkerson will be informed.”

  “When she gets back from her conference,” I said, sarcastically.

  “Yes,” the nurse said. “Exactly.”

  I decided that sarcasm was not the best thing to be playing with, seeing that Sylvia Worth was the one who told me that Dr. Parkerson going to a conference was a lie. I didn’t want anyone thinking that she was feeding me information. They’d use that as an excuse to stop her from seeing me, and she was my only connection to the outside world.

  “And when will that be?” I asked. “Because I’d be happy to tell her, myself.”

  “Are you’re sure that’s advisable?” Nurse Melodie asked. “You seem to have a propensity for telling rather tall tales. Don’t you think that Dr. Parkerson will just see any story you tell about Mr. Rafferty as just one more?”

  “I don’t care,” I said. “That guy has to be stopped. And since none of you are doing jack squat about it, I guess it’s up to me.”

  “What exactly do you think he’s doing?” she asked.

  I stared at her for a long moment. She was on my bad guy list. Should I trust her with any real information until I was sure she was not the bad guy I was looking for?

  “It’s just a feeling,” I said. “Like I said, he giv
es me the creeps. It’s not just me, you know—the other patients don’t like him either.”

  “Who?” she asked, her lips a tight straight line on her face.

  I didn’t want to get anyone in trouble, so I latched on to the one person she could not harass. “Natalie,” I said, and glared at her. “Didn’t she die today?”

  “This afternoon,” the nurse said, and frowned. “How did you know that?”

  “Patients talk, Nurse Melodie.”

  “I see.” She bit her lip. “She had a heart attack. A terrible thing, but not unexpected.”

  “It seems to me that a lot of people have had heart attacks here over the years,” I replied.

  Her face paled. “What are you saying?” she asked. “Do you think Mr. Rafferty is somehow responsible?”

  I’d gone too far, and I knew it. “No,” I said. “I’m not saying that at all.”

  “So, what are you saying?” she asked.

  “I’m just saying I don’t want him around me,” I said. “He creeps me out.”

  Nurse Melodie sighed, like she was suddenly weary of the whining of another patient. Thank goodness.

  “Nothing can be done until Dr. Parkerson returns,” she said. “I’ll do what I can to keep Mr. Rafferty away from you until she comes back and makes a decision about how best to deal with the situation.” She held out her hand to me. “But now, it’s time for you to go back to your room. It’s late. You must be tired.”

  As a matter of fact, I was. But I was also nervous and didn’t think I was going to be able to sleep. But, of course, Nurse Melodie had the answer to that little problem.

  “Take your medication,” she said, after she led me to my room. She handed me my pile of pills. “So you can sleep.”

  I glanced at the mound of medication in my hand and saw that there was a new one. A capsule, so bright pink it was hard to miss.

  “What’s this?” I asked, picking it up and holding it out for her to see.

  “You haven’t evacuated your bowels in two days,” Nurse Melodie said shortly. “And we can’t have a blockage, now can we?”

 

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