The Boyfriend Experiment

by Sean Ashcroft

  Spencer watched as she flicked through his limited wardrobe, watching as she threw old, worn jeans, a button-down shirt, a sweater vest, and the tweed jacket with elbow patches she’d gotten him as a joke when he’d first gotten his job at the university. They’d known each other since their freshman year, having met through the school’s LGBTQIA+ Alliance when they’d both joined. Cassie was his best friend in the world, and Spencer still sometimes wondered why. She was so vibrant and full of life and fun, she made friends wherever she went. She definitely didn’t have to hang out with him for lack of better options.

  He was grateful for having her in his life, though.

  “Do you own shoes that aren’t sneakers or, like, wedding shoes?” She glanced around the room, searching.

  “Work boots?” Spencer tried. They were worn, and he suspected Cassie would reject them, but they were the only other pair he owned.

  She dug them out, dusted them off, and inspected the scuffed brown leather. Spencer used them mostly for the hike up to the local observatory. They were the only pair he had with decent tread.

  “These are perfect.” Cassie set them down at the end of the bed. “Okay. Get dressed, and wear nice underwear.”

  Spencer wasn’t sure he was convinced. Dressing up like someone who played a professor on TV didn’t seem like it was the best way to attract a potential one-night stand. “Are you positive this is a good idea?”

  Cassie nodded. “We’ll go to a nice, fashionable bar. You’ll have the whole geek chic thing going on. Someone nice and clean-cut and wholesome will take you home and be surprisingly good in bed. Trust me.”

  “You’ve got this all figured out, huh?” Spencer smiled wryly. He knew there was no point in arguing. Even if it didn’t work, at least he’d get a night out. He hadn’t had one of those in a while, either.

  Cassie raised an eyebrow at him.

  “Okay, okay. I’ll get dressed again. Can I have a little privacy?”

  “You haven’t got anything I haven’t seen before, but yeah,” Cassie headed to the door. “You’ve got five minutes.”

  Spencer laughed as she left the room and hurried to change his clothes. A glance in the mirror showed him that it did actually kind of work, and that Cassie was probably a genius. Well, he knew she was a genius. Just not in terms of fashion.

  She always looked good, though. Put-together. Maybe she’d give him lessons so that when he did finally meet The One, he might not scare the guy off with some kind of huge style faux pas that was invisible to him.

  “Lookin’ good, Spence,” she said as he emerged from his bedroom again, giving him a slow once-over. “You’re gonna have your pick of the boys. Promise.”

  Spencer wasn’t sure he believed that, but he followed her out of the apartment feeling a little more confident than usual, anyway. Confidence was supposed to be the key to attracting people, wasn’t it? Maybe it’d all work out anyway.

  * * *

  The bar Cassie had chosen was a little crowded for Spencer’s tastes, but Spencer’s tastes ran more to quiet libraries and small cafés people didn’t know about. It wasn’t so loud he couldn’t hear Cassie telling him she was going dancing, at least.

  That did mean he was suddenly alone, but that wasn’t so bad. He’d been right to trust his best friend—this particular place was full of people who caught his eye, and it was easy to pass the time watching them and wondering if he’d be able to pluck up the courage to approach one.

  Even if he didn’t, it was nice to be among people for a change. Spencer wasn’t so much of an introvert that he didn’t like to be reminded that other people existed, after all. Especially attractive people. Most of the contact he had on a daily basis was with students, who seemed like children to him, now. He was old before his time, perhaps, but it was just as well that he wasn’t likely to get caught up in a scandal with a student. There was more than enough of that going around these days.

  This might not have been quite his pace, but he wasn’t going to meet people anywhere else. At least he had a chance here. Slim as it felt.

  “Hey.”

  Spencer turned to see where the voice was coming from, and saw a man in a plaid shirt sit down next to him. The first thing Spencer noticed were his tattoos, coiling their way up his arms and disappearing into his rolled-up sleeves.

  The second thing he noticed was the way the guy was looking at him. Appreciative, bordering on predatory. Spencer wet his lips. This was a long way from the clean-cut, wholesome man Cassie had promised him earlier.

  He kind of liked that. He liked having a stranger’s eyes on him, taking him in as though he was worth looking at. Arousal curled deep in his stomach at the thought that this guy—who was by all possible definitions gorgeous, with warm eyes and a very promising smile—might be interested in him.

  Maybe his chances weren’t so slim after all.

  He was tall and broad-shouldered and handsome, everything Spencer generally told himself was aiming too high, well and truly out of his league. And he’d approached Spencer unprovoked.

  Unless…

  “Did Cassie send you over here?” he asked, unable to hide the disappointment from his voice. Help was one thing, matchmaking was another.

  The guy raised an eyebrow. “Who?”

  Spencer licked his lips again, a blush creeping up his neck. Maybe she hadn’t, after all.

  “Oh, umm. I just thought… you’re very attractive and attractive men don’t normally say hey to me.”

  The guy burst into laughter. Spencer wasn’t entirely sure how to take that.

  “Sorry, sorry,” he said after a moment. “That was… weirdly earnest, and I probably shouldn’t laugh at you if I want to improve my chances, huh?”

  “Your chances?” Spencer asked shyly. He couldn’t quite contain the hope that he was hearing exactly what he wanted to hear.

  “Of convincing you to take me home with you.” He grinned. “I’m Jesse, by the way.”

  “Umm, Spencer.” Spencer blinked at him. “Why would you want that?”

  He knew he was talking himself out of getting laid, but he couldn’t quite stop himself. It was such a shock to be approached by someone like Jesse that he couldn’t get his brain to switch back on and make him act like a human being who was used to being found at least a little attractive.

  “Because I’m new in town, and you’re very cute,” Jesse whispered conspiratorially. Spencer’s ears burned.

  “I am?” Spencer asked. He wasn’t used to hearing that at all.

  Jesse laughed again. “Yeah, you are. Maybe I’ve got a thing for nerdy guys. You’ve got the whole sexy college professor thing going on.”

  “I am a college professor,” Spencer said.

  “A sexy college professor,” Jesse insisted. “That’s awesome, though. What do you teach?”

  “Astrophysics.” Spencer smiled wryly. As if he could have sounded like a bigger nerd.

  “Oh, cool. Like Neil deGrasse Tyson?”

  Now it was Spencer’s turn to laugh. Non-academics normally just asked him what astrophysics was, or stared blankly at him. It was nice to talk to someone who at least had a passing understanding. “Yeah, kind of. I like to think I’d be more fun at parties. I try not to pick apart the science in Star Wars, y’know? It’s a movie. Let it be a movie.”

  “I’m with you there.” Jesse smiled. “Can I buy you a drink? You can talk to me about astrophysics and I promise I’ll try to keep up.”

  It all seemed too good to be true, but Spencer was enjoying Jesse’s attention just enough to accept it. He didn’t get a lot of attention like this at all. Certainly not so much that he could afford to knock it back just because he couldn’t believe he’d gotten this lucky.

  “Sure. I’d love to hear all about your tattoos, as well. They’re so cool.”

  To Spencer’s surprise, Jesse blushed. “What’re you drinking?” he asked.

  “I’m not fussy.” Spencer shrugged. “Whatever you’re drinking.”

/>   Jesse stood. “Keep this seat free for me. I’ll be right back,” he said, heading for the bar.

  As quickly as he could, Spencer got out his phone to text Cassie.

  A gorgeous man approached me and wants to talk about astrophysics. He wants me to take him home. I just want to be a hundred percent sure you didn’t hire him.

  He didn’t really think Cassie would go to that extreme. He was just still surprised that someone like Jesse would want to talk to someone like him.

  Nothing to do with me. Have a great night ;)

  Spencer’s stomach twinged at the thought. He’d caught the eye of a beautiful man less than an hour into his night out, and he already had an offer from him. It was exciting to be wanted.

  He could see why Cassie put so much effort into the way she looked, now. He’d have to ask her for a proper makeover later if a few seconds of her time was enough to net him someone like Jesse.

  Jesse returned with two beers and handed one over to Spencer as he sat down. “So. Tell me about the classes you teach?”

  “Well, this semester I’m taking a couple of undergrad classes on astrophysics and covering one on mathematics, but it’s not really my strong suit. I’m very good at describing space, and I personally think I do a great Carl Sagan impression, but math is… I mean, it’s necessary and everything and you need to understand how it works, but computers do most of it for me and I’d rather keep it that way.”

  “I hear you on that,” Jesse agreed. “Numbers and I are not friends. Bordering on mortal enemies.”

  “They’re not for everyone.” Spencer chuckled, sipping his beer. This was nice. He hadn’t talked to a stranger other than his students in a long time. And this was a nice stranger.

  “So, what do you want to be teaching, if not math?”

  Spencer hesitated, but then decided Jesse really was interested, and started explaining about all the most interesting recent developments in his field. He wasn’t sure how much of it Jesse actually understood, but he was nodding along and asking questions in all the right places.

  It felt so good to be listened to like this. Few people ever really listened to him. Especially about his work.

  Now all he had to do was keep Jesse’s interest until they were ready to head home.

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  Love,

  Sean <3