JAYDEN (MC Bear Mates Book 9)

by Becca Fanning

  Of course, when she’d seen the bikes following her, panic had hit. She’d known who they were. Had known they were chasing after her. She’d panicked, and with her eyes more on the rear-view mirror than the windscreen, she’d driven over something that had burst her tire and had her half-wheeling off the road.

  Then, madness had struck.

  Rather than chasing her down and demanding she come with them, the riders had helped change her tire, and when she’d squeaked out that she thought something was wrong with the exhaust, Jay had dropped down to take a look, and then the next three hours had happened.

  She’d been raised not to believe in fate. To think kismet was a lie, and that the only plan out there was the one God made for them. But how was this anything other than fate?

  God couldn’t have a helping hand in this, not when it involved her stealing more money than she made in a year to help her grandmother get well again.

  God’s plan wouldn’t include a huge sin, would it?

  So no, it had to be kismet.

  Still, kismet was terrifying.

  With a gulp, she staggered over to the sink. Resting her hands on it, she peered at herself in the mirror and wondered what they thought of her. Then, she blushed again because what they thought of her shouldn’t matter.

  I’m my own woman, she reminded herself.

  But, she peered at her blond hair, wincing at the wispiness of it. Then, as she looked over her pixie-high cheekbones and soft mouth, combined with the weird purple eyes, she knew as she always did that she looked far too much like a freak to be considered beautiful.

  She was short and slender to the point of skinny. The only plump bit about her was her boobs.

  How could she, in all her smallness, be suitable for those two men out there?

  With their shoulder-length sable hair, and their bright blue eyes, craggy jaws, strong noses, and lips made for kissing?

  With their muscular frames, which seemed to be made up of nothing other than strength?

  Her father had always sighed at her and said she couldn’t help looking like a fairy. Fairies were not pretty little creatures in her house. They were an evil being. Her father had always looked at her with

  sadness in his gaze, then more pity for being ugly.

  But was she ugly?

  Leila didn’t really know.

  For so long, she’d been told she was ugly and that no good boy in the Church would want her, that she’d always just taken it as red.

  Then, one day, when a good boy had tried to force himself on her, and no one had believed her but had all sided with him—her parents included—she’d known it was time for her to leave. Time for her to go where she wasn’t thought of as ugly and just a vessel for a good boy to sully and to make more good boys and girls.

  But this? To go from that to this?

  It was all just too much. Far, far too much. With shaky hands, she ran the faucet. The water seemed to take an age to get warm.

  Not that that should have surprised her. She hadn’t exactly chosen this place for its creature comforts.

  If anything, she’d gone for bare bones. That was all she could afford.

  No way was she going to waste her purloined funds on some fancy hotel when her grandmother needed the damn money for treatment.

  So what she wasted more water than she used? So what she’d seen a few creepy crawlies around and about the place?

  It was cheap.

  Cheap was good.

  Letting out a shuddery breath, she used the cold water to her benefit. The stream of chill liquid over her wrists calmed her heavily beating heart some, and by the time it ran warm, she felt a little more at ease. Splashing her face, she grabbed her soap and began to scrub at the dried blood that had caked on her nails and was dotted around her face and temples.

  She wasn’t entirely sure why it had gone everywhere, it just had. Kon looked just as bad. In fact, he was worse to be fair. He’d lugged Jay from the road to the back of her truck, then from the truck to the hotel room. It was a wonder the cops hadn’t pulled him over to check out why he was driving around like a frenzied serial killer post murder spree.

  Now she thought about it, though, she was totally grateful that hadn’t happened.

  Every minute had been precious. Every single one lost to them might have meant life or death.

  Another shudder rushed down her spine at the thought.

  It was then Leila knew she couldn’t deny her feelings. Crazy though it might seem, there was definitely something between them. Something that connected them.

  She knew it because Kon had been right. She’d have comforted anyone in his position, with his twin injured and in distress… she was a compassionate person.

  But she’d sensed the exact moment he’d reached the end of his tether and had blindly held out her hand for him.

  It made no sense, but nothing about any of this did. She was just going to have to get to grips with that.

  But, just because they meant something to her didn’t mean they could take over her entire world.

  No way, no how.

  When blood was no longer adorning her like a macabre make up job, she decided it was time to brave the outer room.

  Sucking in a sharp breath, and praying that all would work out well and they wouldn’t turn into monsters—and she didn’t mean Bears—the minute she unlocked the bathroom door, she let herself out.

  With a quick glance around the bathroom, she noticed Major, Pip, and Mundo had gone. Jay was lying on the bed, his feet crossed at the ankle. Kon was striding back and forth, pacing from one side of the room to the other.

  His agitation worked her up a little, but she cleared her throat to free it from her voice and whispered, “If you want to clean up, bathroom’s free.”

  Kon nodded and strode past her. She blinked in surprise when he made no move to touch her, instead went straight to the bathroom.

  Not that he shut the door.

  She could hear him shrugging out of his clothes, and when the shower went on, the sound of the spray hitting the tiles was as close to her as if she’d been in the room.

  Was he just going to shower with the door open? Stand there naked, letting the water cascade over him like something from an ad for aftershave?

  She gulped at the prospect than strode over to the bed. It would be strange sharing a room with not just one but two guys, still, she couldn’t afford to move rooms and get charged for it, and she got the feeling they wouldn’t budge.

  With a sigh, she settled onto the mattress.

  It wasn’t late, but it might as well have been midnight. She was tired, bone deep, and the uncomfortable mattress, which had kept her up half the night thanks to its squeaky coils, felt like a cloud.

  She’d been roughhoused on the floor, taken the weight of a man who weighed more than… well, she didn’t know what. He had to be over three hundred pounds, surely? She felt the aches in her bones and muscles of having supported him and kept him upright. Even her boobs ached where his head had been pillowed for over an hour.

  She should probably have had a shower, too. It would have helped with the aches, but, even with a locked door between them, she’d have found it inordinately difficult to get undressed.

  Not a problem Kon shared, it would seem.

  With a sigh, she lay back against the mattress and closed her eyes.

  “Pip says you’re a Seventh Day Adventist.”

  His words had them popping open again. “I was. I left the Church.”

  “Why? Were you a bad girl?”

  “In their eyes, yes. The son of one of our community’s most respected men tried to rape me. I managed to fight him off but when I told my parents, they didn’t believe me. Told me to hush it up. Unfortunately for them, I’d already told my guidance counsellor at school and one of the assistants at the community hall where it happened.”

  He cleared his throat. “Do you mean to tell me they wanted you to keep it quiet?”

  “Yeah. T
hey did.”

  He cleared his throat again. “I don’t think I’m going to like your parents, sugar.”

  “That’s okay. I don’t like them much either at the moment.” She turned her head on the pillow so she could better see him. He’d done the same so their gazes clashed.

  His rage astonished her. It was written into his face. The tensed eyes, the pursed mouth. The lines bracketing his jaw, furrowed between his brows.

  “It’s okay,” she told him softly. “It’s all in the past.”

  He grimaced, but his tone was like silk rasping over gravel as he bit off, “I’m not sure who I want to string up most. Your parents or the guy who attacked you.”

  She grimaced. “If I’m being honest, I’m not sure if I know either. They didn’t believe me at all. They said I must have led him on.” A shocked laugh escaped her. “Me. As if.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “How could I lead him on when I look like I do?”

  He blinked. Shook his head a little. “I’m not sure I understand, Leila.”

  “I’m ugly, Jay.” Goodness, did she have to spell it out?

  “Ugly?” His eyes bugged out. “What in the hell kind of mirror are you looking at? You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve seen this year. Hell, you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

  She frowned at him. “There’s no need to use flowery words, Jay. I’ve long since come to terms with what I look like.”

  He let out a deep sigh. “Did you see how Kon was pacing?”

  Frowning at the change in subject, she answered, “I guess. I just thought he wanted to use the bathroom.”

  Jay snorted. Shook his head. “Nah, Kon had to burn off the energy. He’s like that. Look, I’m the talker. I’m the one who gets us in and out of trouble, usually. He’s the back up. The brawn, if you will. But he also has a brain.”

  “So, you’re loud while he’s quiet?”

  “Exactly,” he replied, pleased she’d understood what he was trying to say. “If Kon doesn’t have to speak, he won’t. That’s just how he works.”

  “Okay, but what’s your point?”

  The shower cut off at that moment, and their ears pricked for the sound of the curtain being dragged across the rail.

  “Let’s see what he has to say about this crazy belief you have.”

  “What crazy belief?”

  “The fact you think you’re ugly, Leila. Dear goddess, you’re so beautiful you hurt my eyes.”

  She flushed, then felt discomfort lodge itself in her throat. Did he think he was being kind by doing this? Building up her confidence only so he could knock it down later?

  “My father said I looked like a fairy.”

  “Exactly. You do. You’re so fucking cute, I just want to kiss you and never let you go.”

  She blinked. “But fairies are repulsive, evil creatures. Why would you want to kiss me?”

  “Fucking hell,” he spat, not even cringing when she winced at the curse. “They really did a number on you. We’re probably going to have to wait a decade for you to just get used to cursing. Then a lifetime to make you realize how fucking beautiful you are.” Kon strode out into the room. “Isn’t she, Kon?”

  “Isn’t she what?” the other twin replied shortly.

  “Leila reckons she’s ugly as fuck.”

  Kon froze mid-step. He turned on his heel to stare at them both in their beds, then reached up to scratch the back of his head. “Is this some kind of trick question? Leia’s about as ugly as a fucking unicorn.”

  Jay snorted. “You see why I do the talking?” To his brother, he demanded, “What in the hell kind of compliment is that?”

  “Unicorns are beautiful,” Kon immediately snapped. “They’re like whiter than white and they have golden fucking horns and weird colors on them.”

  “Well, fuck me, he’s right. You are a unicorn.”

  Utterly confused, Leila scrambled backward and sat up in bed. “It’s okay. I came to terms with how unattractive I am a long time ago. You don’t have to make things up. I was only trying to explain that my father said I was trying it on with Devon but, what was the point? I mean why would Devon even want to try it on with me if I’m so ugly?”

  Kon gawked at her, then dragged his gaze to his brother. “Is she for real?”

  “Yeah. She’s for real.” Jay shook his head. “This is fucking surreal is what it is.”

  “Who the hell is Devon?”

  “I’m not sure. Think it’s some bastard who tried to rape her.”

  A growl escaped Kon. “What?”

  “I know.” He let out a long breath. “Her parents didn’t believe her. She left the Church because of it.”

  Kon shot her a look. “It’s okay if you were pushed, baby. We won’t hold it against you.”

  Though the sentiment was touching, Leila quickly shook her head. “No way. I left. They wanted me to apologize, said all would be forgiven, but I wasn’t having that. I did nothing wrong, but they treated me like I was some kind of criminal or something.” She folded her arms across her chest. “I didn’t want to be in a place where they could think so poorly of me, while claiming my attacker had done no wrong because it was my fault for tempting him.”

  “Well done,” Jay told her, and she blushed to see the pride etched onto his features where anger had so recently taken pride of place. “You did the right thing, sweetheart. No way did that fucking place deserve you after that.”

  She wriggled her shoulders. “Some days are harder than others. I left all I knew, and then I moved to another state.”

  “You can’t regret it,” Kon demanded, striding forward and coming to perch on the end of the bed.

  She tried very hard not to stare at the bare expanse of his chest that was revealed to her hungry gaze. His lower half was covered with a large bath towel, but his torso was wet and still had drops of water trickling down the grooves of muscles bisecting his chest.

  She’d seen some of the boys in a similar state of undress when they’d all been at a pool party two years ago. None of them had looked like Kon.

  It shamed her to admit that if they had, maybe she would have thrown herself at one of them. She didn’t think she’d ever seen a male quite like him in her life.

  Of course, her world had been quite sheltered up until recently. Still, she’d seen a lot of them around Houston…. No man seemed to compare to the two here in this bedroom with her.

  Kon frowned down at his feet, then, like he’d come to some grand decision, turned on the bed, hooked his leg on the mattress and asked, “Are we just not going to talk about it?”

  For herself, Leila had to shamefully admit to being more interested in the sliver of skin Kon had bared with his recent change in position. It took her a few seconds to process what he’d said, but when she did, she flushed with discomfort. Was she turning into a harlot like her father said she already was?

  “What’s the white elephant?” she asked, frowning at the two of them.

  Jay shot Kon a look. “We need to talk about the money, Leila. That’s why we were following you.”

  She bit her lip. “I figured as much. I’d have had to be pretty dumb not to realize what was happening. I’m just surprised it’s taken you so long to confront me.”

  Kon shrugged. “We were watching you, seeing if you were living it large on MC funds.”

  She flinched. “As if I would!”

  “We didn’t know much about you, Leila. Nothing more than the fact you’d suddenly stolen a shit load of money from petty cash.”

  She bowed her head. “I’m truly ashamed of that.”

  “I know. No one with a lick of sense and that amount of money in their bank account would be staying in a dump like this. It’s either purdah or that self-flagellation thing that some of your people get off on.”

  She snorted. “Seventh Day Adventists aren’t into that. And I’m not one anymore.”

  “I thought it was a Christian thing.”

 
“I guess it is, and maybe it once was, but not anymore.” She shrugged. “I needed the money.”

  “We’d gathered as much. Ava, she’s like a cousin to us, said you were using the money to pay for cancer care. Is that right?”

  Leila hunched her shoulders. “Yeah. That’s right. My grandmother is very sick.”

  “Huh,” Kon murmured. “Seems Ava doesn’t always get everything right. She said it was your mother.”

  Leila wrinkled her nose. “Our community is a little lax when it comes to paperwork. Plus, from her age, she could be my mother. My nanna’s only fifty-four.”

  Kon’s eyes widened. “You do realize this is starting to sound more and more like a cult. What did she do? Have your mom at sixteen and your mom had you at the same age too?”

  “Pretty much,” Leila whispered, bowing her head in shame. “I’m considered an older female because I’m nearly twenty-one and not married.”

  “You’ve got to be shitting me,” Jay burst out.

  But she shook her head. “Nope. It is a cult, I guess. But we just call it the Church. That’s it.” When both brothers gaped at one another, she bit off, “I guess you’re changing your mind about me being your mate now you know I’m weird, huh?”

  Their scowls were matching, and Kon’s hand shot out to cup her ankle. She almost jolted off the bed at the thought, but she didn’t ask him to remove his fingers. If anything, she liked the sensation. His tips were callused, and there were ridges on her palm.

  She tried to imagine those ridges running over other, softer, tender bits of her, and felt herself flush at the notion.

  “You’re ours, Leila,” Kon stated frankly, his voice blunt—but she was learning he didn’t seem to have another way of speaking. The man took literal to a whole other level.

  She bit back a gasp at his words, closed her eyes, and shook her head a bit. “This can’t be real.”

  “Oh, it is,” Jay assured her. “Don’t you worry about that.”

  Kon disregarded his brother’s words by stating, “Before we change subject, I’m just curious about your grandmother.”

  Jay nudged Kon’s knee with his foot, and Leila had to hide a smile at his obviousness. It shocked her that Jay’s forwardness didn’t discomfort her. He was obviously more interested in talking about their bond than her sick grandma.