A Smidgen of Sky

by Dianna Dorisi Winget

  It seemed a funny thing for him to say out of the blue like that. Then he did an even funnier thing—he strolled right on past the stone benches and headed inside. He nodded to Ben as the two of them passed. “Afternoon,” he said.

  “Afternoon,” Ben said, before turning to us. “Come on, you two. Let’s go.”

  Ginger and I stared at each other, then back at Lyn. He’d almost reached the front doors. I couldn’t think about anything except how I’d never get my questions answered if he disappeared. “Wait,” I called after him. “Lyn? Wait.” But he strolled into the library without turning around.

  “Something goin’ on?” Ben asked.

  I had no idea how to answer, and no time to come up with a convincing lie. I jumped up. “I gotta talk to that guy before we leave.”

  “Who is he?”

  “He knows about my daddy’s plane crash.”

  “She don’t know him,” Ginger said in a real urgent whisper. “She met him online.”

  I wanted to throttle her. “I do so know him,” I said. “He’s a pilot and he’s from Savannah.”

  Ben eyed us as if we’d both been out in the sun too long. Another few seconds and my chance would be lost forever. I darted toward the library. “Be right back.”

  “Hey, you hold on,” Ben said in a voice that meant business. But I couldn’t stop. Not when I’d come this far. I tossed a pleading look over my shoulder. “I just need a minute with him, is all.”

  I expected to find Lyn in the lobby, seeing as how he was only a few yards ahead of me. But he wasn’t there. I hurried through the double glass doors and trotted up and down the aisles, desperate for a glimpse of that black baseball cap. I ducked in between book carts and movie racks and almost ran smack into a library lady putting magazines away. She pointed a finger at me. “You slow yourself down, young lady.”

  “Sorry.” I forced myself to walk real calm till I rounded the next corner. I paused for a second, trying to spot where Ben and Ginger were, then zigzagged through the aisles all over again, sure I’d find Lyn on the second run. Why would he introduce himself, then disappear?

  A minute or so later, Ben strode around the computers with Ginger on his heels. I stooped behind a display of newspapers and took a deep breath, not sure what my next move should be. I remembered Ginger’s mention of the bathroom. Maybe Lyn was in the men’s room. What in the world was I supposed to do about that one?

  Then it came to me. The car. He’d said the stuff about Daddy was in his car. I rushed back out to the parking lot and over to the Thunderbird.

  “Hey, there she is, Daddy,” Ginger called behind me.

  I was afraid to look back at Ben. “I’m coming,” I called over my shoulder. “Just gotta get something out of the car.”

  The two of them caught up with me just as I tried to yank open the driver’s-side door. Ben grabbed my elbow. “What’s gotten into you, girl? You can’t just go getting into somebody’s car like that.”

  “But he said he has some stuff in there for me about Daddy.”

  I tried to pull free, but Ben didn’t let go. He studied me with narrowed eyes. “Now, you listen here,” he said. “I haven’t a clue what this is all about. But there’s no way I’m letting you take something out of a stranger’s car.”

  The Thunderbird had tinted windows, so I couldn’t tell if anything was on the seat or not. But I had to know. I lunged for the door with my free hand.

  Ben growled under his breath and pulled me away. Then he turned me sideways and swatted me hard across the bottom. I hadn’t seen it coming and it stung like a whole hive of hornets. I choked back a cry, but the tears still jumped to my eyes.

  Ben steered me away from the car and gave me a little push. “Both of you, head for the truck. Now.”

  Ginger whirled around and I stumbled after her, the yellow parking strips wavy and blurry at my feet.

  “You okay?” Ginger whispered as she scrambled up into the cab.

  “Shut up,” I said, and crawled in after her. Ben pulled out of the parking space and stopped by the Thunderbird. He jotted down the license plate number on a scrap of paper. I didn’t know why and wasn’t about to ask, seeing as how I’d decided never to speak to him again.

  We drove through town with Ben scowling and me sniffling and Ginger stone-faced between us, her hands tucked into her lap. I figured we were headed back to their house, but Ben turned up the street to our apartment instead. Ol’ Faithful was parked at the curb. Mama must’ve just gotten home from work.

  I kept my head down as I tromped up the stairs behind Ben and Ginger. I knew this time wouldn’t be anything like the day at Glen Bay. This time I’d have to explain.

  15

  MAMA WAS DUSTING when we walked in. She took one look at my drippy nose and wet eyes and nearly dropped her dust rag. Her eyes swept over Ginger and then settled on Ben.

  “I swatted her,” he said.

  “What in heavens for?”

  “Better ask her.”

  Mama turned back to me, her eyebrows raised. “I’m listening, Piper Lee.”

  I had no choice but to launch into the story about Real Investigations and posting Daddy’s story online and agreeing to meet Lyn. But I was careful to leave out everything about Tina and how I’d discovered the missing-persons forum in the first place.

  When I got to the part about Lyn turning out to be a man, Mama sucked in her breath and put a hand to her mouth. She turned and looked at Ben.

  He stepped away from the wall where he’d been leaning with his arms crossed. “I have his license plate number. I’ll call down to the prison and have ’em run it through the computer. Should only take a few minutes.”

  Mama didn’t say anything, just watched him walk into the kitchen. Then she turned back to me. “What in the world is wrong with you, Piper Lee? Surely you know better than to give private information to a complete stranger like that?”

  “But he didn’t seem like a stranger, Mama. He knew about Daddy.”

  “What exactly did he know?”

  “He knew all about the plane crash. He remembered it, and he even has a friend who works for the coast guard who was there at the site.”

  Mama shook her head. “Honey, anybody who reads the newspaper or knows how to search the Internet could find out all about your daddy’s plane crash. It’s public record. You can’t automatically believe everything a person tells you, ’specially a stranger.”

  “You think he was lying? Why would he do that?”

  “People lie on the Internet all the time,” Ginger said, sounding like a real expert. “My teacher taught us that in third grade.”

  I’d almost forgotten she was in the room. It was the first word she’d spoken since we’d come back to the apartment.

  Mama fixed her with a look. “Then if you knew that, I guess it was your responsibility to tell your daddy, now, wasn’t it?”

  Ginger paled. She opened her mouth as if she were going to say something, then stayed quiet. It made me feel just a pinch better.

  “But Mama,” I said, “I didn’t give out a lot of private information, not even my phone number.”

  “But you agreed to meet him all by yourself.”

  “Only ’cause I thought he was a she.”

  “Would it have made any difference, Piper Lee? Are you honestly telling me you wouldn’t have gone if you’d known he was a man?” I didn’t have to think long to know she was right, and it pretty much left me at a loss for words. My silence seemed to fire her up all the more. “And who gave you permission to ride to the library by your lonesome, anyhow? I don’t recall giving it.”

  “Miss Claudia knew ’bout it.”

  “And I bet she figured you’d already asked me.”

  “Not sure,” I said.

  “Well, don’t worry. I intend to talk with her about it.”

  Ben stepped back into the living room.

  “Well?” Mama said, not sounding too sure she wanted an answer.

  “The c
ar’s registered to a Nathaniel Markham.”

  “Who’s that?” Ginger said. “The guy we met said his name was Lyn.” She looked at me. “Right, Piper Lee?”

  “Well, yeah,” I said, but I wasn’t so sure what I knew anymore.

  Ben sighed. He ran a hand through his hair. “Listen, you two,” he said, slowing his words down as if he were talking to five-year-olds. “It means his name isn’t Lyn. His name is Nathaniel Markham. He didn’t want you to know his real name ’cause he was pulling the wool over your eyes. He told you he knew something about your dad, Piper Lee, so you’d agree to meet with him. And the reason he took off like he did is on account of me showin’ up.”

  Mama stood and started to pace. “Do you have any idea what could have happened to you girls? Any idea at all?”

  Ben reached out to put an arm around her as she started her third lap around the room. She stunned all of us by slapping his hands away. “How could you leave the girls alone with a strange man?”

  Ben’s eyes sparked with surprise. “I didn’t leave ’em alone with anybody, Heather.”

  “But you weren’t there when this . . . this Lyn showed up. Were you?”

  “I was at the auto-parts store.”

  “That’s what I mean. You left them alone.”

  “I wasn’t gone more than twenty minutes at most.” Ben shook his head. “I’m sorry, Heather. You know I’d have never left ’em if I’d had a clue as to what was going on.” “But how could they plan something like this and you not know anything about it?”

  Ben turned his palms up. “Now, that’s a real good question. But I think you’re askin’ the wrong person.”

  Mama glanced over at me and I tried my best to look innocent. I had no idea why her anger had turned from me to Ben as fast as you’d toss a hot potato, but I figured I’d better take advantage while I could. My wide-eyed look must’ve worked, because Mama whirled back on Ben. “But you’re the adult!” she cried.

  “That don’t make me a mind reader.”

  “I don’t expect you to be a mind reader. But I do expect you to know what’s going on when I leave Piper Lee with you.”

  “I didn’t have reason to suspect anything was going on, Heather. Did you?”

  “Well, maybe if you’d been paying more attention instead of worrying so much about your car, you would’ve noticed.”

  Ben studied her through narrowed eyes. The muscle in his jaw started flexing back and forth. “I wasn’t worried about my car in the least,” he said, his words slow and deliberate. “The girls asked if they could look around at the library for a bit, so I figured it’d be a good time to run and grab some carburetor fluid. You’re making me out to be the bad guy here, and I don’t see how I did anything wrong.”

  “But think what could’ve happened. What if you’d been gone even five minutes longer?”

  “What’s the point in letting your imagination worry you ’bout something that never happened?”

  “Don’t you tell me what to worry about.” Mama’s voice was rising.

  Ben sighed. He cleared his throat. “All right, now,” he said. “You got a right to be scared. I guess you even got some right to be mad at me. But you’re working yourself up into a lather for nothin’.”

  Mama crossed her arms. She gave Ben a good long glare before turning to me. “Piper Lee, you and Ginger go to your room for a few minutes and give us a chance to talk.”

  Ginger and I glanced at each other and then at Mama. Ginger probably looked at her daddy, too. But I didn’t. I was too scared to look at Ben.

  Ginger followed me to my bedroom and nudged the door shut with her foot. She dropped down onto the bed next to Mowgli and flicked his ear with her finger. He opened sleepy eyes and gave her an evil stare.

  “Better watch it,” I warned. “You’ll make him mad.”

  She shrugged. “Everybody else is.”

  I couldn’t argue with that one. I slumped across the foot of the bed, letting my top half hang down, the blood running to my head. I’d never expected Mama to end up more upset with Ben than with me. For a few minutes I’d been thankful, even happy. But now I felt more guilty than glad, and my heart was pulsing hard enough for me to feel the beats.

  “They’ve never fought like this,” Ginger said.

  “I know.”

  “I hate it. It makes my stomach ache.”

  “Yeah,” I said.

  With the door closed and the fan humming, I couldn’t make out exactly what was being said, but there was a whole lot of hurt leaking through the walls. Listening to it did more than make my belly ache. It made me want to cry.

  Finally, after what seemed like a whole month, the bedroom door swung open and Ben said, “Ginger, let’s go.”

  Ginger popped up like a jack-in-the-box without even a look at me. A few seconds later there came the slam of the apartment door . . . and then silence.

  I crept out of my room and peeked into the living room. At first I didn’t see Mama, but then I caught a glimpse of her green tank top at the kitchen window. She stood with her back to me, her forehead against the glass, her arms pulled tightly across her front. I’d never seen someone look so wilted and still be on her feet.

  “Mama?” I said. “You all right?”

  She didn’t turn around, but she raised her head. Then she fumbled with a tissue and blew her nose two times, hard, before turning to face me. Her eyes seemed shrunk up and her cheeks were a lot redder than normal. “Oh, Piper Lee,” she said. “Do you know what could’ve happened to you?”

  “I wouldn’t have gone anywhere with him, Mama. I’m not that dumb. I just wanted to find out what he knew about Daddy, is all.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me what you were doing?”

  I thought that was a pretty silly question. “’Cause I didn’t figure you’d let me talk with a stranger.”

  Mama crossed her arms. “So how did you know you’d be able to get to the library to meet with him?”

  “I didn’t. Ben wanted to work on his car. He only took us ’cause Ginger and I told him I had some overdue books.”

  “So you lied to him?”

  “I had to.”

  “No, you didn’t have to. You chose to.”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  Mama shook her head and took a trembly breath. “You know what I really want to know, Piper Lee? I wanna know just how you found that Real Investigations website.”

  My heart sank. “How I found it?”

  “Yes. And there’s no need for you to repeat my questions.”

  “It was just a pop-up.”

  “And where exactly were you when it popped up?”

  It felt awful to have Mama glare at me that way. It hurt, just like a bright spotlight hurts your eyes. I didn’t know what to do or say. I swallowed, and even that hurt, because my throat was as rough and cracked as old pavement. I started to cry.

  Mama didn’t say a word. She didn’t move a muscle. She just stood there and studied me. After a while she stepped across to the box of tissues on the kitchen counter, brought one over to me, and said, “Well?”

  I blew my nose, and then I said, “I was trying to find Tina’s phone number for Ginger.”

  Mama’s only response was to flinch. But there was something heartbreaking in that little jump.

  “Sometimes Ginger talked about her mama,” I said. “She always wondered why she left and where she was now, so I thought, I just thought . . . if I could find the number . . .”

  “So that’s how Tina found out about the wedding.” Mama gazed up at the ceiling. Then she walked out to the living room, dropped down onto the couch, and buried her face in her hands.

  My heart cramped. I grabbed the box of tissues and ran to sit beside her. “I’m sorry, Mama,” I whispered. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

  Mama cried into her hands for an eternity, her shoulders shaking up and down. And I sat there and cried with her, because what else was there for me to do?

  Finally, Mama
raised her head, yanked another tissue from the box, and turned to me. “Piper Lee, do you honestly think you’re the only person in this world who matters?”

  With all my heart I wanted to say no. But I couldn’t get my tongue to form even a little word like that one.

  Mama shook her head and shuddered. Then she took hold of my chin. “Now, you listen up, Piper Lee. You listen up good, because I’ve had enough. The Good Book says there’s a time for everything, even a time to let go of things. And this is the time to let go of your daddy once and for all. So you let go of all that sadness and all that anger and whatever else you got inside of you. You hear me? You pull it all outta there and you let it go for good, just like I had to. Because your daddy’s gone and he’s not coming back and I can’t take this anymore.”

  Mama released my chin and her shoulders drooped. I tried to make sense of what she’d said, especially that part about being angry. “You were mad at Daddy?” I asked.

  “You bet I was mad. He’s the one who made the decision to go out in the storm that day. He’s the one who broke every safety rule he’d ever been taught.”

  I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Deep down, I’d always felt angry at Daddy for leaving us the way he had. But I’d thought I had no right. And I’d thought it was just me. Everything seemed still. Like the room, even the whole building, was holding its breath.

  “Anyway,” Mama said, her voice quiet. “After a while I realized that the same traits that made your daddy go out that day were the traits that made me love him so. And I knew I had to forgive him and move on. ’Cause when someone you love dies, it’s your job to keep on living. That doesn’t mean forgetting. He’ll always be in my heart, and yours, too. But you gotta let go now. You hear?”

  I nodded and grabbed another tissue. “I’m real sorry I made you and Ben fight. When are you gonna tell him about what I did with Tina?”

  Mama gave a little shrug. “I’m not sure,” she said. “We’ve decided it might be best to stop seeing each other.”

  I nearly came right up off the couch. “W-what?”