No Regrets (Bomar Boys #1)

by Jess Bryant

  “Shit, that came out wrong.” Colt immediately started towards her, hands out to his sides, “I didn’t mean Cash’s women. I meant mine. He’s picked up after me plenty of times was what I meant…” He tilted his head and groaned, “You don’t want to hear about them either, huh?”

  “Not really.”

  “For the record, he never got over you. Never. There were a couple of other girls… Do you want to hear this?” He paused and she found herself nodding even though her heart squeezed painfully in her chest, “There were a couple of others girls but nothing serious. He didn’t go out and date. He definitely never got serious with anyone. You were it for him, Jem. I mean that.”

  She nodded, her throat still feeling tight, “Thanks.”

  “No prob.”

  “I’ll still try not to leave my stuff laying around all the time.”

  “If it gets me a warm breakfast, can’t say I would complain.” He joked, “Oh, by the way, I picked your phone up too. It’s on the coffee table in case you start looking for it.”

  She blushed and avoided his gaze again, “Thanks.”

  It had been in the pocket of her sundress, along with her keys. She didn’t remember it falling out but then again, she hadn’t been all that focused on her phone, or her pockets or even her dress after Cash tugged her inside and pressed her against the door to have his way with her.

  “Jesus Jem, it’s just sex.” Colt chuckled, “You keep acting like a shy little thing and I’m gonna be required to give you hell for this, ya know? Big brother rules.”

  She rolled her eyes at his teasing, “You’re not the big brother. You and Cash are twins.”

  “Oh, I’m totally the big brother. I was born three minutes and forty-nine seconds before him.”

  “Mmm, I never knew that.”

  “Of course he never told you he’s the baby of the family. I bet there’s a lot he’s never told you.” He sighed, leaning a hip against the counter opposite her and crossing his arms over his broad chest, “He ever tell you how he got his name?”

  “Cash?” She raised an eyebrow, noting the sudden shift in Colt’s mood from playful to serious, “Yeah, he’s named after Johnny Cash right?”

  “The man in black, yeah.” He nodded seriously, “But there’s more to the story.”

  She watched him out of the corner of her eye, trying to figure out what he was getting at. It was a strange topic of conversation but she supposed he was getting at something and she’d have to wait to see what it was. As it was, they were talking about her favorite topic ever, Cash, and Colt was, as per usual, giving her insights into her boyfriend that he never would.

  “What do you mean?”

  “You ever wondered why he’s the only one of us not named after a gun?”

  Jemma paused in the middle of stirring the eggs, “Uh… no. Not really.”

  She hadn’t thought much of their names really. Nobody she knew called Remy by his full name. And Cash and Colt, well they were twins and their names matched in a lot of ways. She’d never realized that Cash was the only one not named after a type of firearm because she hadn’t ever thought about the other two being named after guns.

  “Remington. Colt. Cash was supposed to be named something similar but when he was born he screamed and screamed and just wouldn’t stop. Nobody could soothe him. He screamed and cried for days and do you want to know what Decker decided?” Colt snorted and Jemma winced, already expecting the worst, “He said Cash didn’t deserve a strong name because he was weak. He made that decision about a crying baby that was days old, a baby that was born a month premature because he beat the shit out of Chrissy so bad she was unconscious for nearly a week. He didn’t even get named until she woke up. That’s why Cash is named after our mother’s favorite singer instead of a gun.”

  She winced at the painful truths that Colt had just laid on her. He looked half-angry just saying the words. His fists had clenched at his sides and all she wanted was to go to him and wrap him in a hug, tell him that he wasn’t alone anymore. He wasn’t the only one that wanted to protect Cash from their terrible parents.

  But as much as Colt was like his twin, he was different too. He wouldn’t welcome her comforting hug, would most likely push her away and it would make things awkward. So instead, she simply pulled the pan off the stove and transferred the eggs to a plate.

  She wanted to ask him how he knew all of those things but the sickening feeling in her gut told her she didn’t need to. Decker had told them. Probably as he beat both of the young boys senseless.

  She searched for words for a long minute and finally decided to focus on the one thing she could handle, “Cash isn’t weak.”

  “No. He’s not.” Colt frowned, “But he’s not like the rest of us either. He’s just as damaged but he’s not as hard. Decker saw it the second he was born.”

  “Saw what?”

  “Cash isn’t named after a gun because he’s not a weapon. He’s not hard, cold steel. He cares and that’s his greatest strength because it makes him a good man, but in our family, it’s also his greatest weakness.”

  Jemma swallowed hard, not knowing what to say to that. Cash wasn’t a weapon. In a lot of ways, Colt was right, but she had a feeling he was also wrong. Decker had used Cash as a weapon for years, against Colt. Hurting him in order to hurt his twin who only wanted so badly to be able to protect him.

  Cash may not have hardened himself to it, but she didn’t think Colt had either.

  He sighed, ran a hand through his hair and then met her gaze when she glanced at him again, “My point, in case you’re wondering, is that Cash has had to deal with Decker’s bullshit since the day he was born because that bastard decided he was lacking. Now, I’ve tried to protect him however I can but I couldn’t save him from himself. No matter how much I asked or begged him to push Decker out of our life he couldn’t do it, not until you came back.”

  “Me?” She turned to him, surprised.

  “He told me yesterday that he was done with Decker. He doesn’t want him anywhere near you or the life he thinks you two can have together.”

  “I didn’t know that.” She blinked, “He didn’t mention it.”

  “No. Can’t imagine he would have. But I wanted you to know he did it for you when he couldn’t do it for himself. That’s how much you mean to him.”

  She gaped at the bombshells Colt kept dropping on her. She supposed it shouldn’t surprise her that this half of the twins talked so much more freely than the one she was in love with. They’d always been like that. Cash was quiet and introspective. Colt was the one that ran his mouth, and the more she thought about it the more she realized he probably did it to draw attention to himself and therefore away from his twin.

  It was all to protect Cash.

  “Thank you for telling me. I love him. I think you know that. But I’m not naïve enough to think we won’t encounter problems. He has his issues and I have mine.”

  Colt nodded, “No thanks necessary doll. If anything, I owe you a debt of gratitude. You got him to do what even I couldn’t. Decker’s out of all of our lives now and that’s a gift I never expected. So thank you.”

  She managed a small, tense smile, “We both love him so we’ll both take care of him from now on, right?”

  “You’re going to be my favorite sister.” Colt winked and surprised her by leaning forward and giving her a chaste kiss on the forehead, “Now pass over the eggs before they get cold.”

  She laughed as he went back to playful just that easily. She scooped up half of the eggs and put them on a separate plate for him. He pulled a fork out of the drawer and then a bottle of Tabasco out of the fridge. She rolled her eyes when he doused his eggs and then shoved a huge bite into his mouth before he’d even taken a seat at the small kitchen table.

  “Mmm, these are good.” He spoke with his mouth full and she giggled.

  “Thanks.”

  “I’m putting in a request for these every morning if you move in.”
<
br />   “If I made breakfast for you every day you’d get fat and then the ladies who enjoy your morning run so much would probably lynch me.” She teased.

  Colt made a crude gesture and motioned to his chest, “This is never going to get fat sweetheart. It’s part of the Bomar DNA. Not a single one of us that isn’t built like a brick shithouse.”

  She laughed at that cocky, crude truth delivered as only a Bomar could. He was right of course. They were all big and muscular. Probably because they’d all been fighting since they were in diapers in one way or another. Fighting with each other. Fighting to survive. They were beautifully built bastards.

  “What are you two doing out here?”

  Jemma jerked her attention up at the sound of a husky voice in the hallway and her grin widened. Cash was standing there, just as half naked as his twin in nothing but a pair of boxers. His hair was a mess and he was rubbing his eyes. His muscles flexed with the movement and the now familiar tingle in her lower belly reacted to the sight of him in a way that it never had or would for his brother. Beautifully built didn’t even begin to cover it.

  “Breakfast.” Jemma moved towards him and went up on her tiptoes to brush her lips across his. “Sorry, were we being loud? I didn’t want to wake you.”

  His chest rumbled as he pulled her against him so he could whisper in his ear, “Wish you’d stayed in bed. I didn’t wake up wanting breakfast. I woke up wanting you.”

  She bit her lip to stifle a moan when his mouth brushed her sensitive skin, “Well, I woke up wanting to do something for you.”

  He grinned as he pulled back to look at her, “I could think of something.”

  “And for your brother.” She smacked his arm at the innuendo, “I made breakfast. Scrambled eggs. But you better hurry because Colt is inhaling them like a human vacuum cleaner.”

  “You didn’t tell me the girl could cook.” Colt grinned around a mouthful of food. “Holding out on me forfeits your portion. Sorry bro.”

  “Like hell.” Cash chuckled, “I didn’t know she could cook either.”

  “I can’t. Not really. Just the basics.”

  “It’s more than we can manage so thank you.” Cash brushed his lips over hers softly, and then again, harder, and she melted against him.

  It was a soft, warm kiss. A good morning kiss. Just lips and long slow drags. His arms went around her and she circled his neck. Her nipples pebbled and she went up on her toes, fully prepared to deepen the kiss when she heard a familiar beep and Colt cleared his throat.

  “Saved by the bell.” He chuckled, “Jem, that’s your phone alerting you that you two are not alone in the world.”

  She wrinkled her nose as she dropped back to the ground, “Damn phone.”

  Cash smirked, “Damn brother.”

  They brushed their lips together again softly before she stepped back out of his arms. Cash adjusted his boxers and then cleared his throat. She bit her lip to stifle a laugh instead of pointing out it was useless. He was too big and far too hard for a pair of cotton boxers to camouflage his erection.

  “I’m going to grab some clothes and take a quick shower.” He winked at her, “Don’t let him eat my breakfast.”

  She watched him disappear back into his bedroom, his tight ass all but begging her to follow him. Her phone beeped again and she groaned. She didn’t know who would be messaging her this early in the morning on a Monday but she went to grab her phone off the coffee table where it was buzzing once again.

  “What’d you put in these eggs, Jem? Crack?”

  She rolled her eyes at Colt, “I was all out of crack unfortunately. It’s just eggs and cheese and your giant helping of Tabasco.”

  “Well it tastes like fucking feels, which is to say it’s hot and juicy and I’m gonna want…”

  Colt trailed off his lewd comment as he looked at her and she knew that her face had given her away. While he was talking, she’d picked up the phone and her shock at what she’d seen must have been evident. Her heart thudded in her chest too hard and the ground felt like it shifted under her feet. She felt unsteady and she sank to the edge of the couch to keep from falling.

  “Jemma? Jemma?” Colt was in front of her almost instantly, “Cash! Get out here! Something’s wrong!”

  She sucked in a gulp of air and tried to focus on what was happening around her. She saw Colt kneeling in front of her. Behind him there was a loud noise that sounded like a door hitting a wall and then Cash was there too, filling her vision. The two of them with those matching blue eyes, looking at her with worry and fear in their eyes and it nearly strangled her.

  They were in trouble because of her. The images on that phone would haunt her every time she closed her eyes. Images of Hoyt beaten and bruised. Images of the twins caught on security camera leaving the apartment with blood on their clothes. And then the threat that if she didn’t come home that not only would this “evidence” be turned in to the police but the attached images of her would be released as well.

  Images she hadn’t known existed. Images of her naked and bound. Images that Hoyt had taken without her knowledge during a private, intimate moment when he’d managed to convince her it would be sexy to use handcuffs and a blindfold. Images that now made her sick because she could remember the demeaning way he’d treated her so that she swore to never, ever sleep with him again after. And she hadn’t, not that it mattered now.

  Threats and manipulation. It was what Hoyt had always been best at. Getting and keeping the upper hand. Why she had thought that they would all escape that episode in Houston unscathed, she didn’t know.

  “She’s pale.” Cash growled as he pushed his brother aside to get to her, “Baby, what happened? What’s wrong? Are you sick?”

  “Sick.” She grasped at the word and nodded, tucking the phone underneath her, “Yeah, sorry, I’m okay I just got dizzy.”

  “Dizzy?” Cash’s eyes searched her face and she nodded again, trying to steady her breathing and control her shaking.

  “Yeah, I don’t know what happened. It’s probably nothing. I just stood up too fast after I bent over.” She tried for a smile but didn’t think it was all that convincing since he didn’t budge, “I didn’t mean to worry y’all.”

  “Are you sure you’re okay?”

  “Yeah. I’m fine. I’m sorry.” She reassured Cash with another nod, her eyes darting momentarily over his shoulder to where Colt had stood back to his full height.

  He frowned at her but didn’t say anything. She looked away. He had to know she was lying. He’d been in the room and seen what had actually happened. He’d seen her pick up the phone and then freak the hell out. But he wasn’t saying anything to Cash about it for some reason.

  Cash breathed out a sigh of clear relief and cupped her cheeks, “Damn babe, don’t scare me like that okay?”

  She grasped his wrists and nodded, “I’m sorry.”

  Cash kissed her hard and fast and she was a little bit steadier by the time he released her. He said something to his brother but she didn’t dare look at Colt again. She nodded when Cash said he was going to go take a shower and let him go when he too stood.

  Colt didn’t move, just stood there and stared at her until Cash disappeared behind the bathroom door. She let out a shaky breath once she was sure he was gone. She wasn’t surprised when Colt edged in between her legs and the coffee table, sitting on it and then holding out his hand expectantly.

  “Give me the phone.”

  She shook her head, “It’s nothing.”

  “Bullshit. Whatever is on it, you freaked out and you didn’t want Cash to know so hand it over before he gets out of the shower.”

  Jemma swallowed hard, her hand shaking as she pulled the phone from beneath her thigh and held it out to him. Cash and Colt were a team. That was what she’d always told herself. And now she was part of that team. She and Colt had agreed earlier that they would protect Cash, together, so she had to trust him with this.

  She watched as he looked at the
phone, gauging his reaction. His eyes went wide and his jaw flexed. She saw his muscles tense and half worried he was about to crush her phone in the palm of his big hand. His cheeks were livid with color when he finally glanced back up and his voice was rough when he only bit out three words.

  “I’ll handle it.”

  She blinked in confusion, “How?”

  “You don’t want to know the answer to that Jemma.”

  Her heart started to thunder again as what he meant sank in. He would handle it the Bomar way. Which meant that someone was liable to get hurt. No, not liable. Someone would get hurt. And she didn’t even care, as long as that someone wasn’t him… or Cash.

  “I don’t want you to get in trouble, Colt.”

  “I won’t.”

  “But…”

  “Trust me? Please. I’ll handle this.” He looked over his shoulder before meeting his eyes again, “We agree he doesn’t need to know anything about this, right?”

  She bit her lip but nodded. She didn’t like the idea of lying to Cash but she told herself it wasn’t a lie. She had to protect him from this. Keeping him in the dark would keep him from doing something stupid, something violent, something that he wouldn’t be able to come back from. She had to protect him from this and the only way she could do that was to keep it from him and trust Colt to take care of it.

  “Good. I’ll get it handled.”

  “How?”

  He scrubbed a hand over his face, “You don’t need to know that.”

  She reached for his arm when he started to pull away, “I don’t want you to get hurt either. Tell me that you’ll be careful. Whatever you’re going to do, whatever you have to do, I trust you to keep this from hurting us, hurting Cash, but I don’t want you hurt either.”

  Colt frowned, glanced over his shoulder again and then sighed, “I know a guy in Houston, someone that owes me a favor. I’ll have him pay the little fuck a visit, that’s all. He’ll get the hint or we’ll hit him harder.”

  “Hitting him didn’t work last time.”

  “Jemma, sweetheart, I don’t want you to think too badly of me so I’m sugar-coating this shit for you like Willie fuckin’ Wonka.”