by Ashley Munoz
Bexley let out a sound like she’d just been burned. We could hear Bella and Cole yelling to each other from downstairs about different locations they were checking and coming up empty, indicating we were safe and very alone for the next few moments.
“Do you remember that time we were locked in the closet at Jack’s homecoming party?” I whispered against her ear. Pulling my other hand free from her pocket, I flicked the button on her shorts.
“Yes,” she responded breathlessly, winding her hand up around my neck, holding me there.
Sliding my fingers into her heat, I didn’t waste time; I rubbed her clit, eliciting a suppressed moan from her. She tossed her head back, to my shoulder.
“That was the first and only time I’ve ever gone bareback…I remember it feeling so fucking good.”
“It was incredible.” She groaned while moving her hips to match my rhythm against her.
“Speaking of…” I cleared my throat, unsure how to bring this up. “Are you on anything…or…?”
“On…like birth control?” She laughed, panting while I continued to work her with my fingers.
How was I supposed to gauge how intimate we were allowed to be with one another without being awkward? All I knew was the idea of being with her in every imaginable way was stuck on repeat in my head.
“Yeah…I mean, if we were to not use anything…would that be a big deal?”
Her continued movements against my hand encouraged me that this wasn’t freaking her out.
“Well…I haven’t been with anyone in two years, but have you been checked since you were last with someone?”
“I’ve never slipped up a single time and not used protection, but we’re required to get checked regularly because of kissing and skin-to-skin contact—I’m clean.” I explained a little too fast, because I hated my stupid fuckboy past. I didn’t deserve Bexley. “But we don’t have to. I totally understand if you’d prefer—”
“No, it’s okay. I’m on birth control, so if you decide you want to…” She trailed off. She wouldn’t have said yes if she wasn’t comfortable, right? I felt awkward…but fuck.
Just fuck.
“Ryan?”
“Yeah?” My mouth was against her ear as I tried to sort out our conversation.
“The kids are going to find us any second…will you please make me come?”
I chuckled, kissing the nape of her neck while I increased pressure against her clit, drawing a soft moan from her. She tossed her head back further into my shoulder, her eyes shut tightly while she rode out her orgasm.
“My god,” she gasped, those blue eyes cracked, shining bright. “I love you.”
She robbed me of breath when she looked at me like that.
I pulled my hand free, spinning her so I could press my lips to hers right as the kids stomped up the stairs and ran toward our hiding spot.
We spent the evening laughing while making dinner together. We did spaghetti with meatballs, and the kids helped Bexley shape the meatballs, which was a huge hit. They laughed and made jokes, and we had some kid show on in the background. After dinner, we walked outside, where my garden was set up with outdoor string lights and a huge patio set.
The kids played in the massive yard I had meticulously landscaped while Bexley relaxed on a lounger with a glass of wine. It was the perfect night, and it ended with making love to the only woman I had ever wanted that kind of intimacy with.
Now we were pulling into the studio where my last few movies had been filmed. Massive warehouse buildings lined the lot, the sky was cloudy overhead, and a light drizzle hit our faces.
“Hey Tom.” I waved as he drove past our group in a golf cart.
“Who was that?” Cole asked as he tilted his head back, taking in how tall the building was. This particular studio was much taller than the others. It was often used for the more detailed sets: superheroes, magic—anything that required special effects and involved large props.
“Security. Want to see half of an airplane? There’s one inside.” I leaned down, grabbing Bella’s hand.
“Cool!” Cole said as we made our way in.
No one was currently shooting or doing anything other than set design and prep for a flick that was set to start filming in just a few weeks. I’d be returning to work soon too; the reminder was a sting in my chest I couldn’t rub away. I’d be leaving my little paradise with Bex and the kids, and I had no idea what that would mean for us.
Inside there were overhead lights on, showcasing the massive front half of an airplane, along with a few sets being painted. Paints, ladders, sawhorses, and drop cloths were scattered everywhere, which was normal as pre-production began to come together. They’d need all the sets finished first, then we could start setting up the scenes and what not…at least that was the little I knew about set production. I often missed big components because I was focused on my lines and my own role, which required meticulous preparation.
“Hey Ryan!” Tamara, one of the set designers, saw me and called out with a smile.
“Hey, Tam. Wanna meet my people?” I swung Bella’s hand in front of me while walking toward her. I knew Bex was still on edge about mixing her world with mine, but Tamara was one of the good ones. She’d often invite me to her family’s house when she knew I wouldn’t be able to make it home for a holiday, or if she knew I was missing my parents. She was always looking out for me, so as far as mixing went, I wanted her in it.
Tamara’s beautiful brown eyes that nearly matched the hue of her dark skin went wide as we neared. She stood from her prop, dusted her hands on her work apron, and walked toward us. Her tight ebony braids were bound at her neck with a large hair tie, and they swooshed as she hurried toward us.
“Ryan Prince, have you been holding out on me?” She eyed the kids and her mouth worked into a massive smile as she watched my free hand grab Bexley’s waist out of habit.
“It’s new…newish,” I said, feeling a blush creep up my neck.
“I can’t wait for Grant to see this. This is just… My god, I’ve been waiting for you to get your head on straight.” She beamed, sticking her hand out and making introductions with Bexley. The women talked, laughing and discussing kids and whatever else while I focused on the idea of Grant being here…which meant Shelly might be here, and I really didn’t want Bexley to meet either of them.
Jerry, my agent, had already let it slip that he felt like Bex and the kids were a distraction I didn’t need at the moment. He said it wouldn’t do any favors for my image and I needed to lean into the Shelly meeting. They wanted to boost publicity for the movie, and in turn it would boost good publicity for me. He’d no doubt been talking to Grant, and the director too, which was total bullshit, but I supposed if I really wanted to know the finite details, I could just answer their calls. I’d avoided talking because I only had one message for them and that was to fuck off with the publicity bullshit, but still…I didn’t want any of that to get back to Bexley.
“Is Grant in this studio…or Jerry, for that matter?” I asked Tamara, who was busy talking to Bella about making princess dresses.
Tamara worked primarily in wardrobe—she was one of our top designers—but occasionally they’d pull her into set design as well because she was so talented.
“I saw both of them milling around, but I have no clue where they went. It was like an hour ago.” She looked past my shoulder briefly then returned her attention to the five-year-old in front of me.
I nodded and let them continue their conversation.
After showing them the set, I took the kids to one of the buildings set up specifically for our kid actors. It had a massive playground inside with a ball pit, tunnels, arcade games, a huge theater, and a virtual reality station.
“Are you serious right now?” Cole yelled, taking in the immense setup of tunnels and slides, the colorful walls and leather chairs for gaming.
“Have at it,” I said, settling into one of the leather couches with Bexley.
She was staring at her phone with that same worried look she’d had the day before. I hadn’t missed how her phone had vibrated on the counter this morning, several times in a row.
“Do you need to take it?” I asked, worried again if it was Shay or…maybe it was Logan; I was positive she wouldn’t have ignored her best friend this long.
“No, it’s fine,” she said easily, shoving her phone back into her purse. I tried not to get frustrated by her dismissal, but a small part of me wanted there to be transparency between us, a trust where we could tell each other these things.
Hypocritical of me considering I didn’t want her to know what my agent and producer were likely planning to set up behind my back, but just the same, I wanted her to know I was here for her.
The day passed with more laughter, fun, and an unforgettable lunch inside the studio cafeteria where the kids met two of my costars, both of whom happened to be huge A-list celebrities. Bexley even looked a little starstruck when she met Tom Dallanger.
I didn’t love the way he returned the starstruck look as he shook her hand, so I ushered us back to my house quicker than I probably needed to. With the kids watching a movie and unwinding downstairs, it left Bexley and me to spend some time together upstairs.
She was out on the balcony attached to my room when her phone rang again. She let out a heavy sigh while pulling it from her jeans.
Figuring she’d send it to voicemail again, I was surprised when she answered.
“Hello?” she said softly, attempting a slightly cheerful tone.
I made it look like I wasn’t interested in what she was doing by pulling out my own phone, but I was tuned in only to her.
“I know I have,” she muttered quietly. “No, it’s not.”
Fuck this, I needed to get closer. I casually walked outside, stepping behind her in encouragement. She smiled up at me in response then leaned into my side.
“I know, Logan.”
My spine went straight as an arrow. I knew the kids’ father was a part of their lives and would never stop being involved, but hearing his name in my home, falling from Bexley’s lips…it made me insecure in a way I had never been in my entire life.
Pulling on Bexley’s hand, I led her into the house, to the bed where I hoped she’d keep talking while I put my mouth on her. I had this insatiable need to remind her that I was in the picture now. She was mine and would never be his again.
“Logan, I didn’t mean to ignore you. It’s just…” She paused as he yelled in the background. I could hear him saying something about weekend visits and them talking ahead of time. “No, we’re not home.” Her blue eyes wandered to my face.
I smiled and trailed a finger down her back then began rubbing the tension out of her shoulders.
“We’re in Portland this weekend, with…” She paused again, and based on the screaming I heard, it wasn’t because she wanted to. It was because she’d been interrupted. “Yes, with him.”
I smiled wider, rubbing lower on her back, pressing soft kisses into her skin. Her breathing turned a bit ragged for a second before she caught herself and cleared her throat.
“No, we aren’t talking about this right now.” She narrowed her gaze on the comforter. “Because it’s none of your business…you’ve met Ryan, there wasn’t a need to tell you.”
More screaming echoed through the phone. I hated how this prick talked to her, and I had a feeling he tended to do it in front of the kids too.
“You didn’t exactly extend that courtesy to me when you brought Dana back home, pregnant with your child.”
Each word hit like a bullet to my chest. I knew it shouldn’t have, but the venom in her voice, the betrayal she still harbored from what he had done to her and the fact that she’d said ‘home’…it all barreled into me like a wrecking ball. I knew in my head that Bexley was done with Logan, knew their chapter was over…but my heart whispered reminders to me about how she’d left me, only to find him. She hadn’t given me a chance to fix us; she’d just left and then he was allowed to step in and begin this life with her.
A life I’d always dreamed of with her.
I pressed one last kiss to her shoulder before getting up and going to find the kids. I knew this hole in my stomach would pass. I knew it wasn’t even fair to feel this way anymore, but I needed a second to regain my sense of sanity, because Bexley was quickly unraveling all of it, day by day.
26
After I finished my phone call with Logan, I sauntered downstairs, only to find Ryan asleep on the couch while the kids watched their movie on the opposite sofa.
I pulled together a quick dinner from the ingredients we’d purchased earlier and let him sleep. After he woke up, the tension settled in the air between us. He was kind to the kids, smiling, laughing…but with me he was withdrawn.
Once the kids were in bed, I wandered upstairs, locking his bedroom door and seeking him out. He was on the bed, his laptop open, typing away. When he worked, he wore these cute-as-hell thick-rimmed blue light glasses, making him look like a sexy nerd. It was irresistible to say the least.
“What’s going on with you?” I asked hesitantly, more softly than I intended.
He glanced at me over his screen and gave me a fake smile. “Nothing, all good.”
Liar.
“You’re acting strange,” I added, unwilling to let it drop. I had done that a million times with Logan, always walking on eggshells, sleeping back to back, unwilling to talk about the lingering tension. I didn’t want that with Ryan.
“No, I’m not.” He continued to type away, even as his terse tone rattled between us.
“Ryan.” I hoped he heard the warning in my tone. I gingerly sat on the end of the bed and waited for him to open up. I needed this with him; without his transparency, it made me feel like he’d just toss me out of his life again.
Setting his laptop aside with a heavy sigh, Ryan stood from the bed. Casually, he walked until he hovered in front of me. In low-hanging sweats and with a naked chest, he was striking, especially in the low lighting in the room.
His hand came out, gripping my chin, tilting my head back until I was staring up at him. I was in a thin tank top and flimsy shorts.
Slowly dragging his finger across my shoulder, he tugged the strap of my tank down. Once it was off, it left little support for my breast. Pulling it free, Ryan held the fullness of me in his palm, pinching the nipple until I bit my lip.
“You’re so much fuller now…” he muttered, almost like he was only talking to himself. His eyes were void of anything other than lust as they stared down at my half-naked form. “There is something bothering me,” Ryan explained dryly, like he was bored.
“What?” I asked breathlessly.
The deadness in his eyes made me feel like I wasn’t going to like the answer, but I still needed to know.
“I need to fuck you.”
I bristled at the lack of love or familiarity in his tone, and part of me wondered if my Ryan had left and this was the man who had meaningless flings and girls for every season in his phone. I would have been lying if I didn’t admit that I wondered if he was different in bed when he was emotionally detached from the body he was pummeling.
Of course, my heart lurched, and my stomach tilted at his lifeless stare and lack of concern for me as he lowered the other strap of my tank.
Deciding I would let his demons play, I pulled my other breast free, pinching the hard bud like he’d done.
A shadow passed over his face as he watched.
“Yeah, just like that. It’s easy for you, isn’t it?” he asked, dark and accusing.
What the hell does that mean?
He lifted my jaw and gripped my chin forcefully as he said, “Show me.”
Understanding dawned as I saw the thick outline of his erection through his sweats. Slowly, I slid down the bed and got to my knees. The plush carpet pressed into my skin as I tugged the band of his joggers down, freeing him. I gripped his length in my hand, and with my eyes
trained on his face, I licked from the base of his cock up to the tip.
No emotion flickered in his eyes as I leaned forward and took him fully in my mouth. My head bobbed up and down as I made room for his length, moaning at the sensation of having him like this again.
Ryan gently rocked his hips forward to seal my mouth around him, then he gripped the back of my head with both hands to keep me in place. I sucked, gripping his hips to get closer; my breasts hung free, my nipples pebbled to a painful degree. Ryan’s gaze lowered to them for a brief moment, lust like a stamp on his face as he watched them bounce with each bob of my head.
He pulled me closer as I almost choked on his length, and then he eased back, letting me adjust. He groaned and grunted as he repeated this process over and over. Right when I expected him to push himself deeper into my mouth or to come down my throat, he slowed his pace, removing one hand from gripping my head. Instead he began running his fingers through my hair. A strange look clouded his features as the silky strands cascaded like water.
Before I knew what was happening, he pulled out. I slowly stood, not sure what had just happened or why.
“Are you—?” I started but was cut off.
He made a sound, something like frustration rattling his chest as he stripped me of clothing then gripped the backs of my thighs and lifted me. I gripped his shoulders as his chest slid against my wet entrance.
“Fuck.” He breathed against my mouth as my back collided with the wall.
He thrust inside me before I could grapple with the fact that he was bare, with the reality of what he was doing.
It felt incredible. His impressive length filled me, with no barrier, nothing keeping us apart; that mixed with this dominant side of him and I was almost over the edge.
I moaned into his neck.
“Yeah…it’s…more than…” He trailed off with a guttural sound, like he was trying to stop himself from sharing too much.
I knew what he was going to say…I knew this was more. We were more; this was everything.