Yours truly,
Arthur Bean
off to north carollina, its gonna SUCK. dont rite 2 much of the movie w/out me.
I may get so bored I write the whole thing. Don’t kill your brother. I hear they have the death penalty down there.
no garantees.
I’m going to try and get the camera back to camp over Christmas, and then say that it was a Christmas miracle. Just letting you know.
haha. how r u gonna get there? hitch a ride with santa???
Whatever. Have no fun in the USA!
no prob.
December 22nd
Dear RJ,
Christmas is going to suck. I wish that Robbie and Kennedy were here. And while I’m at it, I wish for a million dollars. If I had a million dollars Dad and I could just go away to Whistler or Hawaii or something, like everyone else does. I wish he would think about me for once. If Dad could stop his stupid fight with Auntie Deborah, we could go to Edmonton; then at least I could hang out with Luke. And I wish that I could put the camera back at the camp, since I’m wishing for unreasonable things anyway.
Yours truly,
Arthur Bean
From: Anila Bhati ([email protected])
To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])
Sent: December 23, 19:19
Dear Arthur,
I was so happy to see you today! We ate all the cookies you brought over, and they were delicious. Did you make them? My sister ate so many that I had to hide the last few from her so that I could savour them.
I also forgot to give you your present …
OK. I’m lying. I don’t have your Christmas present yet. I’ve been looking everywhere. I wanted to get you something really perfect. You mean so much to me. I thought about writing you a poem or a story, but I write things down and then I think it sounds so silly or juvenile. I don’t know how to write poems the way that you do. You’re so creative and amazing, Arthur, and I feel bad that I didn’t get you anything for Christmas! I’m so sorry for being the lamest girlfriend in the world.
Love always,
Anila
From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])
To: Anila Bhati ([email protected])
Sent: December 23, 20:21
Dear Anila,
I’m glad you liked the cookies. I made them with Nicole and her boyfriend. Dan’s a chef at some fancy restaurant, so he did most of the baking. Nicole and I just ate the batter.
I don’t need any presents from you just because of one stupid day in the year. I don’t even like Christmas! Your email was so nice, it was all the present I need.
Have a great trip to Banff. I’ll see you when you get back.
Yours truly,
Arthur Bean
P.S.: Your poems are awesome. They don’t suck at all.
From: Von Ipo ([email protected])
To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])
Sent: December 25, 10:41
Hi, Artie!
Merry Christmas, buddy! How’s your break going? I’ve basically been playing hockey every day, especially since we have a huge tournament between Christmas and New Year’s. Not that I need to practise, but it’s good for the team if everyone is there, especially since I am basically the captain. If you’re bored over the break, you should totally come and watch us play. It’s basically the same as NHL, but we’re obviously a lot shorter. :)
Anyway, I know Robbie is away, but I thought you and I could hang out and write more of the movie. You could come over here. My mom can make us lunch and we can write and then play video games.
Anyway, let me know. I’ve got some really good ideas about what should happen next in our movie!
Von
December 25th
Dear RJ,
I was right. I hate Christmas. It started with Pickles throwing up all over the kitchen, and then I had to clean it up. She must have tried to eat the tree or something. Then we opened presents and Dad tried to be excited, but it was so fake. He gave me a Nintendo GameCube, but I hate video games. They’re boring. I only play them with Robbie because he doesn’t like to do anything else most of the time. But when I opened my present, I got really mad and then I yelled at Dad about how this Christmas sucked and that we should have gone to Edmonton because at least my family was there. Then I said that I thought Mom was the best parent, and then he started crying and apologizing. I felt so awful right away, but I was still really mad, and then I got mad that he was apologizing about it, but by then I felt mostly angry with myself for making him feel bad on Christmas. But I didn’t know how to apologize, RJ. So I only kind of said sorry. We basically avoided each other all day, but I did hear him on the phone with Auntie Deborah, and it sounded like they were apologizing, so maybe I’ll get to see Luke soon.
I know that Dad is trying really hard to be like Mom, but he’s not doing a very good job. I kind of wish he would stop, and just be Dad again.
Yours truly,
Arthur Bean
From: Von Ipo ([email protected])
To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])
Sent: December 28, 12:40
Hey, Artie!
Did you want to come over? Got some awesome stuff for Christmas. I basically got all the new video games that were the top-rated games this year. Some of them aren’t even out yet in North America, I think. They’re really cool, but some of them are way better with more than one player.
Von
December 28th
Dear RJ,
This has to be the longest Christmas break of all time. I’ve read so many books, and I’ve even been looking at things we can put into the movie.
I think Robbie will like some of my new ideas. I really hope so. This film is my opportunity to showcase my skills as a screenwriter. It’s important to be able to write across genres.
I’m glad Robbie will be home soon. Von keeps emailing me, and I don’t want to hang out with him, so I’ve been trying the whole “ignore him and he’ll go away” thing, but it’s not working.
I actually sometimes feel bad about ignoring him, but, RJ, he drives me crazy, so I think it’s for the best. Plus, I don’t want to see all his top-end equipment. It just reminds me that I have top-end equipment too, but it’s not actually mine.
Yours truly,
Arthur Bean
We’re home, Arthur! I missed you so much! How was your Christmas? XOXO
Welcome back! Christmas was pretty boring. How was Banff?
It was all right. There wasn’t a lot of snow for skiing, and my sister was super moody. But other than that, it was lovely. Except for the missing you part, of course!
I can’t wait to see you! Are you still coming for New Year’s Eve? My parents are having all my cousins over (and there are a lot of them!).
My mom is already cooking for a midnight feast!
I’ll be there. My dad said he could drop me off at 6 and pick me up at 12:30. Does that work?
I’m so pleased that you’re coming to meet my whole family. They hear about you all the time! I’m sure they will love you as much as I do. XOXO
back
Welcome.
any xmas miracles?
Not unless you count my dad almost finding the camera looking for an extension cord in my room but not seeing it.
close enuf
From: Kennedy Laurel ([email protected])
To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])
Sent: December 31, 9:14
Hi Arthur!
How was your Christmas?? Mine was AMAZING!!! We skied SO much and I read some awesome books! Remind me to tell you about them! The hotel we were at was so nice too! There was a hot tub LOL! Anyway, what SUCKS is that my dad got a call and we had to come home for him to go to work today!
NOW I don’t have ANY plans for NYE! :( Wanna come over and hang out??
Kennedy :)
December 31st
Dear RJ,
I know
I should go to Anila’s family party, but I really want to see Kennedy. Maybe she’s changed her mind about us going out.
I want to see both of them, but Anila would understand, right? I mean, Kennedy has no one to hang out with tonight. And she asked me to come. She didn’t even think that she would be in town, and New Year’s sucks if you have to hang out by yourself. Anila has her whole family there. She probably won’t even notice if I don’t go. Man, RJ, it’s times like these that I wish I had an identical twin …
Yours truly,
Arthur Bean
Hi, Anila. I’m really really sorry, but I don’t think I can come tonight. I’ll make it up to you later though!
WHAT?!? Is everything OK? What happened?
Everything is fine, but it’s kind of hard to explain.
Can your dad not drive you? Because we can come pick you up and drive you home. I really want you to come tonight! It’s going to be awful if you’re not here!
It’s not that. A friend got back into town earlier than she was supposed to and she’s really upset about it and I need to hang out with her so that she feels better.
Are you hanging out with Kennedy?!?!
Just as FRIENDS! She’s really upset!
You are seriously going to not come to your girlfriend’s party because Kennedy is sad that her vacation is over?? I can’t believe you.
Arthur, you suck! You really do. I’m so angry right now and I’m really sad …
I also don’t really want to see you ever again. Actually, I don’t think I ever want to even talk to you again. You are cruel, Arthur Bean.
No! It’s not like that. I thought you would understand. You said yourself that New Year’s Eve is a dumb holiday!
I mean, if you’re that upset about it, I can come to your house if you want. :)
Don’t bother. We’re soooo done, Arthur. Go and hang out with Kennedy forever if you want!
From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])
To: Kennedy Laurel ([email protected])
Sent: December 31, 17:07
Dear Kennedy,
I can definitely come over tonight. I had other plans, but I cancelled them. We’ll have such a good time. I just have to tell my dad to drop me at your house instead. I can bring a bag of chips. I’ll be there around 6:30, is that OK?
Yours truly,
Arthur Bean
From: Kennedy Laurel ([email protected])
To: Arthur Bean ([email protected])
Sent: December 31, 17:17
YAY!!!! I’m SO glad that you’re coming over!!! 6:30 sounds perfect!! My mom said that we can order pizza if you haven’t eaten dinner yet LOL! Do you think you guys can pick up Catie and Jill on your way?!
Kennedy :)
JANUARY
January 1st
Dear RJ,
This year is already weird, and it’s only the first day. I went to Kennedy’s house for New Year’s last night, but she only talked to Jill and Catie the whole night and I ended up sitting on the couch watching TV with her older brother and little sister. She didn’t even kiss me at midnight. I really thought she would! We were watching the ball drop and doing the countdown and everything, and when midnight hit, I turned to Kennedy, ready to give her the best kiss of her life, but she just hugged me fast and turned away.
Anyway, the whole thing was super lame, but I’m still pretty glad that I got to see Kennedy. I really think I love her. I’m not stupid enough to say it to her, though. First I have to get her to be my official girlfriend. It can’t be that hard. I know she already likes me. So here I will make my New Year’s resolution. I resolve to be the best boyfriend ever to Kennedy.
I guess I should break up with Anila officially though. I mean, I think we broke up last night, but I’m not totally sure. She could have just been mad, but if I’m going to be the best boyfriend to Kennedy, I can’t have two girlfriends. I’ll leave it for a couple of days though. I don’t want Anila to yell at me.
Yours truly,
Arthur Bean
Hey, Robbie. I was thinking we could send the camera back in the mail with no return address. No one would ever know where it came from!
no way. that will cost so much $. and it will brake in the mail.
We can wrap it in a blanket to send it.
dude a stamp costs $1. imagin wat a camera costs to send.
and wat if it got stollen from the mail? that hapens all the time. at leest we kno where it is.
Fine. We’ll keep it. But one of my resolutions is to not be a criminal. So it’s going back.
ya ur such a crimminal. its borowwed, not gone 4 eva.
Hi Anila! I wanted to say I’m sorry, but you won’t answer your phone! I hope you’re doing OK.
I know that NYE didn’t play out how you hoped. I’m sorry about that. But I’m not sure that we should be together since we live so far apart. It’s too hard when we’re not at camp.
Plus I’m so busy with my movie and school and stuff.
I’m sure that you probably feel sad, but maybe a little relieved, too, like me. I hope we can still be friends. :)
I will NEVER feel relieved. Miserable? Heartbroken? Despairing? So very angry that I could literally rip your throat out? These things I feel. But not relieved to be rid of you.
I loved you so much, Arthur. I can’t believe you could be such a jerk.
I am really sorry.
Stop it. Just stop.
Assignment: Persuasive Writing
Effective persuasive writing can convince your reader of a particular idea, and it’s an important skill to practise in essay writing. Write a short essay on one of the following topics, taking a stand on one side of the issue presented. Make sure to choose your arguments effectively and organize your thoughts so that the ideas build on each other. Be sure to provide a counter-example, then try to refute that example with your final example. The topics to choose from:
Would you rather be a vampire or a werewolf? Why?
What is the best superpower to have? Why?
Which is better to watch: television or movies? Why?
Due: January 14
ZOMBIE SCHOOL
by Arthur Bean and Robbie Zack
and Von Ipo
January 8 Production Meeting Notes
I would like to see a breakdown of scenes for your film and the main action for each. We’ll work on this over the next few meetings of the AV Club. Ensure that you make notes of things you’d like to remember in future meetings. –Mrs. Ireland
Scene One: School
In this scene the students are all leaving because there has been an outbreak of zombie at the school. Ms Whitehead eats a student.
Scene Two: Blazer’s House
The GGA trains in a montage. The audience meets the main characters: Blazer, Zipcode and Tuff Arnold. There are other characters too, like some girlfriends and a few other people in the GGA.
Scene Three: Grocery Store
The GGA runs into ZAP (Zombies Are People) while getting supplies. ZAP is against the GGA.
Scene Four: School
The zombies meet in the basement of the school and make a plan for world dominance.
Scene Five: Blazer’s House
The GGA is training. There is a montage.
Scene Six: ZAP Lair
ZAP kidnaps one of the girlfriends of the GGA to use for information.
Scene Seven: Zipcode’s House
Zipcode and Blazer make a secret plan that none of the GGA know about.
Scene Eight: The Gym
Tuff Arnold works out.
Scene Nine: Around the City
It becomes clear through a montage that the zombie apocalypse has started.
Scene Ten: ZAP Lair
One of the members of the GGA is seen being a traitor and joining ZAP.
Scene Eleven: Blazer’s House
Zipcode and Blazer tell the GGA about their plan to make the mall explode and destroy the zombies. We see the explosions be
ing practised in a montage. The traitor (Nunchucks) is there and records the plan so that ZAP can sabotage it.
Scene Twelve: School
ZAP sends a secret message to the zombies. The zombies are ready at the mall.
TO BE CONTINUED …
AV CLUB POLICY — Amended #4
1. Any student may join the AV Club.
2. All equipment must be reserved ahead of time and signed out upon use and signed in upon return.
3. Have fun!
4. Filming must take place in sanctioned school areas. There is no filming in areas restricted to students, such as the basement, the roof and the staff room.
5. There will be no guns in the film, and other weaponry will be kept to a bare minimum.
6. All equipment must be provided by the students or the Drama Department. Any additional equipment must be requisitioned through the AV Club administrators.
7. Special effects involving explosions are expressly forbidden.
From: Arthur Bean ([email protected])
To: Kennedy Laurel ([email protected])
Sent: January 8, 19:04
Dear Kennedy,
I thought I should let you know that Anila and I broke up. It was just not the right thing to be together. I think it was pretty mutual.
Scenes from the Epic Life of a Total Genius Page 8