Between the Shade and the Shadow

by Coleman Alexander

  An alp, she conveyed only to Hayvon, not wanting to scare the shades.

  Alps! His surprise got the better of him and his thoughts burst forth, so loose and unbounded that Shim and Tev jumped, hearing echoes.

  “What do you mean alps?” Shim said. “Lightwalkers?”

  The scratching snap of footsteps over leaves disrupted the quiet of the forest.

  “Shhh. Give me your bow,” Ahraia whispered, quickly grabbing Tev’s bow and taking an arrow from the quiver at her hip. Alps were a wicked type of lightwalker that had realms in the north, beyond the Shadow Woods. They were said to be dangerous and clever, and they didn’t belong so close to Daispar.

  The footsteps faded. Several tense moments passed. Ahraia let out a breath, lowering the bow.

  “Do you think—” Hayvon stopped, falling silent at the sound of more branches being disrupted.

  Ahraia’s ears twisted towards the sound. She turned and saw movement, and she raised the arrow to Tev’s bow. Several figures hurtled through the dark forest, from the same direction where Losna had seen the alp.

  Quick. Hide! Hayvon conveyed. The shades ducked for cover but Ahraia stood her ground. There was no time to hide. She took aim, her fingers poised to release the bowstring when she realized the runners weren’t alps—they were sprites. A dae-ward led the way, with his hood back and a veil loose across his neck. A nit-ward followed him. Pale skin and scarred skin flashed between tree trunks, along with white-eyes and yellow-eyes both, all with moon-white hair.

  Ahraia froze. Half a dozen enchantments crashed down upon her, like a heavy web that stilled both her body and mind, holding her fingers tight to the bowstring and dimming her thoughts.

  Hayvon, along with Shim, already had his eyes lowered and ears down. The group was led by the Astra. One of the wards stepped in front of Ahraia’s arrow. Ahraia recognized him as Golan, one of the newer wards, without the heavy scars or the yellow-eyes of the others. Her gaze, however, was drawn to someone standing beside him. Something standing beside him.

  An alp.

  Ahraia stared, dumbfounded. It was a golden-haired alp. She had never seen one so close. And she had never—not in all her life—heard of one allowed in the Gelesh, much less accompanied by sprites.

  The alp stared back at her with gleamless eyes. Her cloak was woven of a strange material, uniform throughout, unlike the spritish eaves-web. Dark fur lined the outer edges of her hood, holding back her light-touched hair and hiding her telltale ears. Her icy-gray eyes were small, dim in contrast to the yellow-eyed wards and the white-eyed sprites. Her skin was stained by the Dae-Mon, not dark, but certainly not pale or ashen.

  The enchantment holding Ahraia weakened and she lowered the bow to her side. Her skin crawled from the brief paralysis, but even more so from the presence of the alp. Losna raised her hackles and bared her teeth.

  “What are you doing here?” the Astra said, flushed.

  “Mother!” Tev said, leaping towards her. The Astra shoved her away dismissively, sneering at her.

  “Beyond your shade tree, I’m your Astra,” she said sharply, her words cracking the silence. “That means you address me as such—and your voice isn’t to be heard.”

  Tev flinched, stepping back as though she had been cut. Her shadow leapt from her arms and darted into the undergrowth.

  “Pick up your pathetic shadow,” the Astra said. Her unblemished skin shone out in sharp contrast to the alp. The alp watched curiously. The surrounding sprites looked on with scorn, frowning at Tev as though she was some vile mud mare of the deep swamps. The Astra looked back to Ahraia, “What are you doing here?” she asked again.

  Ahraia realized she was staring at the alp with ears pinned back. She closed her mouth and composed herself.

  Nit-ward Beran sent us hunting, she conveyed, turning her ears down deferentially. To help your shades properly bind their shadows. She suddenly remembered that she was holding Tev’s bow. Well, not right now. And this isn’t mine—it’s Tev’s. She dropped it as though the bow might be poisonous.

  The Astra glared at her. The circle of dae-wards tightened around them. Their veils hung loosely at their necks, revealing their wicked light-scars from all the time spent abroad in full light. They unnerved Ahraia, but not nearly as much as the sharp-eared alp.

  Gavea, the nitesse that had caught Losna hunting for Ahraia, stepped forward. “You aren’t allowed a bow, Ahraia.”

  Ahraia’s scars flushed hotly. Losna thought she saw an alp. It was just precautionary, she explained quickly.

  “An alp? Which way?” the Astra said, cutting Gavea’s castigation short. The alp at her side tensed, her eyes narrowing.

  Ahraia pointed. The air quivered with conveyance that Ahraia couldn’t catch.

  “Golan, take Anasazi and go,” the Astra said. The dae-ward nodded, then gestured for the alp to follow. They hurried off through the woods, heading in the direction Ahraia had pointed. Ahraia watched, the confusion spreading in her mind like the thickening fog in the woods.

  What are alps doing here? And what are dae-wards doing about at night?

  “The alp is none of your concern,” the Astra said dismissively. “Her dealings are with me.” Her ears stood sharp and tall and batted once: an order for obedience. Disturbing as the lightwalker’s presence was, Ahraia swallowed down a dozen other questions. The Astra’s glare shifted to the younger shades with disdain.

  “If your only concern is taking these wretched shades and trying to shape something of them, then you’re wasting your time. They haven’t the will or the wit to become sprites.”

  Shim’s ears curled, but his face remained even. Tev had retrieved her shadow, but her mouth began to quiver. She pressed her lips together, pursing them to be stoic, but a tear dripped across her cheek.

  Stop that, the Astra conveyed sharply. She stepped forward and flicked Tev hard across the face with the back of her hand.

  Tev let out a sob.

  “Stop that,” the Astra said aloud, hitting her harder. Tev dissolved into tears.

  Losna growled.

  “Dae-Mon above,” the Astra cursed, stepping away in disgust. “It’s a wonder she became a shade at all. She won’t even make it to her shadow test.” She leaned down and picked up the bow that Ahraia had dropped. She turned back to Tev. “Stop your whimpering right now.” She struck Tev across the shins with the bow.

  Tev let out a yelp of pain.

  “Stop that!” The Astra stuck again.

  Before Ahraia knew what she was doing, she stepped forward to grab the bow. She would have stayed the Astra’s hand, but a collective enchantment spread across her, keeping her from reaching out. The third time, the Astra’s lash slashed Tev’s face and the shade spun to the ground with a scream, clutching her jaw.

  Ahraia clenched her teeth, seeing blood come away on Tev’s hand. She struggled against the enchantment. She stepped back and the spell dissipated. The Astra hadn’t seemed to notice; she tossed the bow on top of Tev, who sobbed helplessly into the dirt.

  “I don’t know why Beran insists on keeping her. This one either . . .” She shoved Shim roughly aside. He stumbled but kept his footing, never looking up at his mother. “No wonder the Masai thinks the Gelesh is failing . . . How in the night are we going to ever press back the light with whelps such as these? They would be better off given to the Shad-Mon. At least the rest of the spritelings would think twice about returning with such woeful shadows.”

  Losna shook with fury and Ahraia with her.

  “Still,” the Astra said, glancing between Hayvon and Ahraia. “Maybe my next will bear better shadows. Both of you are Beran’s offspring, and look—one binds a rat and the next binds a wolf,” she scoffed.

  Vesta’s not a rat—she’s a martin, Hayvon said, glaring at the Astra. Vesta peeked out with dark beady eyes.

  Hayvon! Ahraia conveyed, for once being the voice of caution. Light seared her blood as well, but standing up to the Astra wasn’t like standing up to their fath
er—the Astra was vindictive and violent, and could condemn Hayvon with a single thought. Ahraia held her breath. Gavea scowled at them both but the Astra, luckily, didn’t seem to care. She was still sneering at Tev, who lay on the ground sobbing.

  “It’s no difference. The point remains,” she said, snorting in disgust. She shook her head once more. “Get these two out of my sight. I don’t care if they ever become sprites.”

  4

  Bindings

  “What in day’s light is the Astra doing with an alp?” Ahraia asked. It was midnight, and the Astra had sent them away with a warning to stay away from the alps and not to speak of their passing.

  Hayvon’s ears stood on end.

  And how could she treat them like that? Ahraia went on. How could she hit Tev without any conscience? Her insides still writhed in anger at the Astra’s attack on her shade.

  Hayvon still didn’t answer. Ahraia wasn’t sure if it was because the Astra had called Vesta a rat, or if he took her command for silence seriously. She fell in beside him, fuming alone in her thoughts.

  They were headed north, away from the alp and the Astra. Losna roamed ahead, scouting for game near the edges of the forest where the last valleys spilled out onto the Endless Plains. It was a safe night for skirting the great expanse, and there was little chance of any light spoiling the dark.

  She finally sensed the touch of Hayvon’s mind.

  It’s really not that surprising. Look at the shadows they bound, Hayvon conveyed.

  Tev’s squirrel scampered through the treetops after Vesta, while Shim’s ermine bobbed beneath them on the ground.

  Hayvon was careful to keep his conveyance from the shades. She’s the leader of the darkening and they’re her first shades. Of course she wants them bound to stronger shadows. It’s a poor reflection on her. Especially when father already has shades from another nit with owls and foxes and wolves.

  It doesn’t mean she has to cast them to the Shad-Mon, Ahraia conveyed, wondering what the Astra would have done if she had actually grabbed the bow.

  Hayvon wrestled his way past a stubborn alder tree.

  It was the same when I bound Vesta. Mother was furious—said she was going to give me to the Shad-Mon that very night. Father still threatens that . . . His eyes turned dark and he kept the remainder of his thoughts to himself.

  Ahraia considered comforting him but stopped when she saw a defiant smile spread across his face. His gaze rose to Vesta, who had a small cone held between her paws, nibbling at the tip.

  Of course, if I had just brought home the bear I bound rather than my little martin, sprites might speak to me as something more than daemon-bait—

  A pinecone suddenly struck his head from above, followed by a sharp series of chirps from Vesta. Hayvon laughed, dodging to the side as a second cone shot down from above. Ahraia gave a weak smile. She knew he was trying to make light of it, but it grated against her nonetheless.

  They don’t stand a chance if she isn’t willing to help them, she conveyed.

  Hayvon shrugged. It is what it is. Those of us with weaker shadows are a mark against our nits. Dwelling on it won’t change anything.

  Ahraia fell silent. She knew Hayvon was right but it made no difference. She sighed and walked on, wondering how she had been lucky enough to bind Losna. She had never told Hayvon how close she had come to returning to the darkening without a shadow at all.

  Shim’s voice broke the quiet of the forest. “Is it hard to kill?” he asked, looking pale but resolute. Neither he nor Tev had spoken since they left the Astra. He swallowed nervously. “I mean, is it hard to hunt?” He had their father’s cold eyes, but they were still white, untouched by light.

  Ahraia considered it, looking longingly at their quivers full of arrows. With a bow it’s not, she thought to herself. “It’s not hard,” she said aloud, hoping to sound reassuring. She enchanted a small maple and raised it above the shades.

  “Do we have to?” Tev asked, following her along the crest of a log making a convenient path through the undergrowth.

  Ahraia felt a twinge of regret for the young shade. The question wasn’t entirely appropriate, but she had no one in her nit to guide her.

  “Yes, you have to. But Hayvon and I will be there to help,” Ahraia said. Tev, if anything, looked even more frightened. Her shadow scampered along the log after her, its bushy tail bouncing wildly in tow.

  Were we ever that small? Ahraia conveyed to Hayvon.

  Smaller, I think, Hayvon answered.

  They seem awfully frightened. She leapt down from the log.

  Neither of them has a wolf for a shadow, do they? Hayvon conveyed, grunting as he hit the ground behind her.

  Ahraia smiled. I suppose not. She stopped and stooped down in front of Tev. The little shade had an angry welt forming across her cheek.

  “Look at it this way, Tev: with Losna on our side, there’s no way we return to Daispar empty handed—” Ahraia stopped, sensing a familiar warmth away in the woods—her shadow. She signaled the others to stop.

  Shim gathered his shadow to him. Tev imitated him but her little squirrel wouldn’t come out of the darkness. Instead, it scampered halfway up a tree and scratched around the far side of the trunk, hiding.

  Losna jogged back through the pines, her gaze darting towards Tev’s squirrel while licking her lips. She had a bounce in her step that told Ahraia she had found something.

  What is it? Ahraia conveyed.

  Two deer. Laying down at the edge of the meadow up ahead, Losna thought, still eyeing the tree. A bushy tail was just visible, twitching nervously.

  Ahraia relayed to the others what Losna had found. Hayvon and Shim’s ears perked up while Tev’s breaths rasped out nervously. The wind whispered far above, but on the ground, not even the fog stirred. The forest was quiet and still.

  “Here’s what we’re going to do,” Ahraia said, wondering if Tev could make a kill by herself or not. “Losna and I will lead. The deer are just down the hillside from here. We’ll make our way down—slow.” And silent. “Once we’ve spotted them, I’ll guide us close enough to make the shots. I want you two to make the kills.” We’ll convey from here on out. Okay?

  Shim nodded, but Tev gave no indication she had heard.

  “What if I can’t?” Her gaze dropped to the ground. “I’m not a very good shot.”

  “She’s terrible. She’s worse than Malar and he’s still a spriteling,” Shim added.

  “That’s all right,” Hayvon said, frowning at Shim. “We’re going to help you, Tev. Ahraia and I will have the deer bound. It will be an easy shot.”

  Tev seemed to brighten at this, but a knot twisted in Ahraia’s chest. Hayvon glanced at her, and again she wondered if he had heard their father’s accusations the night before. She nodded, not wanting to project the sudden nervousness that gripped her.

  Just like what Kren did for us on our first hunts, Hayvon reminded her.

  Ahraia nodded again.

  Losna watched nervously. Bound? Like enchanted? she asked, her bright yellow eyes boring into Ahraia.

  Ahraia didn’t answer.

  I knew it would come to this, Losna thought, discontent rumbling from her chest.

  Ahraia kept her ears up with an effort. Her father’s warnings echoed in her mind. One night, she was going to have to hunt with her bindings and tonight was as good as any to start.

  Couldn’t you just let me do it? Losna thought. I’ll be careful.

  No, Ahraia conveyed.

  Losna’s low grumble turned to a disapproving growl. She knew the ruin that hunting with enchantments held for Ahraia. The problem wasn’t the hunt, of course—it was the binding. The act of enchanting and then killing left Ahraia empty and maimed.

  It’s not worth it. Last time, you ended up sick for a whole turning. There’s no decency in tricking something into death.

  Ahraia steeled her courage, embarrassed that Hayvon might have heard her father’s words the night before. It’s how all
the other shades hunt. At some point, I’m going to have to get over myself.

  Losna huffed loudly, growing more agitated.

  “You lead,” Hayvon said to Ahraia, unaware of the conveyance passing back and forth between her and her shadow.

  Ahraia headed towards the meadow, wondering if she could knowingly keep the deer bound. Losna trailed at her heel, supplying a steady stream of admonishment for even considering a binding. Ahraia ignored her, intent on getting the shades furtively down the hillside. Tev and Shim were quiet, but Ahraia helped them, moving every leaf, branch and tree root that she could. Hayvon and Vesta pointed out loose sticks or logs underfoot and together they managed to get down the hill in true spritish silence. The meadow spread out before them with fog clinging to the tall grasses. Ahraia took a moment to spot the deer.

  Okay, there they are. Her heart thumped loudly in her chest. She pointed across the field to the two subtle shapes at the meadow’s edge. Two flickering sets of ears and a single set of antlers rose above the grass. Losna licked her lips, forgetting her reservations for a moment. Ahraia moved the group into a better position, until the shot would be reasonable for the shades. Silence gripped the night.

  Get yourselves ready, Hayvon conveyed. Shim took his bow from his shoulder and nocked an arrow to the string. Tev mimicked her older brother.

  I’m going to have to bind it, Ahraia conveyed to Losna. Maybe since I won’t make the kill it won’t be as bad.

  Losna resigned herself, staring at the deer, disconcerted. Ahraia tried to calm herself but her body was alight with fear, every nerve tingling in anticipation.

  I’ll bind the stag and keep him still, she conveyed. Shim, I want you to take that one. Tev, you see the doe . . . the one closer to us with its head down? Hayvon’s going to have it bound in place. All you need to do is place the arrow under its shoulder, right in the heart. Understand?

  Tev nodded along with her brother. The tiny shade trembled but raised her bow. Losna was tense, her shoulders squared and ears forward, ready if anything went wrong.