Fragments of your Soul (The Mirror Worlds Book 1)

  Nod’s words set Arvid to thinking. Was it really possible that a creature was immune to suffering and sorrow? She had spent four months under Loke’s roof and had to admit that she had never seen him sad, depressed or anxious in all that time. Sometimes he had sat in a corner, withdrawn and apparently lost in thought. When Arvid had needed help with something, he had usually listened seriously and attentively. The thought of Loke’s look in such a situation filled Arvid with a warm, pleasant feeling.

  “I’ll ask him,” she decided spontaneously.

  Nod rocked his head back and forth. “I… don’t know if that’s a good idea. I wouldn’t…”

  But Arvid wasn’t deterred. Loke could get angry, yes, but she had become accustomed to that. It had somehow become a part of their relationship.

  However, Loke didn’t get angry. When he heard that someone was approaching, his body normalized a little, but he still looked very exceptional when he turned around to Arvid. His skin was dark brown with a hint of gray, his hair tangled and wiry. Not only his body but also his face seemed a little too narrow and long to be human.

  “What are you doing here?” said Arvid.

  Loke pointed wordlessly to some strange formations that hung high up in the branches of a conifer. They looked like a long funnel of thin stalks and grass.

  “The nests of Rönhar-birds,” he said. “Many birds build their nests in the same tree, so they can protect each other. Sometimes some of them nest in a tree in front of my house in Asgard.”

  “You… are watching birds?” said Arvid, stunned.

  “Not only that.”

  Arvid tilted her head back and looked up at the nests. Although she could hear a faint peeping from somewhere, no birds were to be seen. Probably they were afraid of her. It was initially a strange thought that someone like Loke was interested in birds. But then, as she thought about it, it occurred to her that Loke several times had mentioned small things that he had observed outside in the nature.

  “What else?” said Arvid, but Loke shook his head.

  “Go back to Nod. We will have to leave soon.”

  “I’m ready,” Arvid said. “What else have you discovered?”

  “It’s not important for you.”

  “But it interests me.”

  “I hope you know that you’re a terrible pain in the ass.”

  Deep down Arvid felt a nagging irritation, but by now she knew that it wouldn’t get her anywhere. She forced herself to remain calm and said deliberately friendly, “It would… make me happy to see what you’re looking at.”

  For a while Loke looked at her with a deeply furrowed brow. Something in his eyes seemed to change, but Arvid could not tell what it was. Finally, he sighed. “Then come.”

  Arvid had not really expected Loke to give in, but what she got to see was both exceptional and fascinating. Loke showed her the seeds of plants that were hidden under the thick blanket of weed and moss, rolled up like snail shells, and appearing in blue, green, yellow and orange colors. There were pale green flowers, almost invisible, but beautiful, once she had discovered them, tiny thistles in silver blue, nondescript, brown mushrooms with a pattern resembling long rows of runes, beetles that looked like pine needles, and much more.

  After a while Arvid discovered a tiny yellow and red patterned ball in the moss. She reached for it, but as soon as she touched it, long, crawling spider legs appeared beneath it. Arvid jerked so violently she almost fell over.

  Loke laughed. “They look like poisonous berries,” he said, looking at Arvid in amusement, “so they won’t get eaten.”

  Now Arvid had to laugh, too. She wasn’t sure if her heart was pounding so hard from the scare, or because she again got lost in Loke’s strange beauty.

  “You seem to like this environment,” she tried to say lightly. “Did you grow up somewhere out in nature?”

  She could literally watch Loke’s face hardening and something dark and cold appearing in his eyes. “That’s none of your business!” he hissed. “Stop constantly pestering me with questions!” He turned around with a jerk and walked off.

  Shortly after they moved on. The woods were dense and lush, the slopes less steep. With the rising temperatures, the green of their surroundings increased. Soon they were surrounded by flowers, grasses and low berry bushes that gathered in small groups and attracted animals. Twice they saw ungulates which resembled the Hjorters, but were much smaller, and once they heard the distant howling of demons.

  Toward the evening, when the lights of Karst arose far below them, they stopped to rest again. Loke had been in a better mood since their last stop and appeared in the form of a small, robust woman with curly, light brown hair and big dark eyes. He led Arvid farther up a ledge, from where the terrain dropped steeply, and pointed in the distance with an arm.

  “Over there lie Asgard and the Temple City,” he said. “The view is not very good, but if you look closely, you can still see it.”

  It took a while for Arvid to realize what she was looking for, but then it was quite clear.

  “It looks like a mountain,” she said in wonder, because that was what it looked like. One would have thought that someone had placed a gently lit mountain peak in the middle of green plains.

  “In a way it is,” Loke said. “Asgard itself was built around what was once Odin’s castle. It lay on top of a rocky hill. The Temple City was built at the foot of the hill, so today Asgard towers above it like a peak.”

  “It’s really bright,” said Arvid. “No wonder you can’t see the stars there. Even from this distance it lights up like a lantern.”

  For a while they stood there in silence, staring into the distance and over the country, which spread before them.

  “What does the name Asgard mean, anyway?” said Arvid.

  “It was the land Odin ruled over before today’s Asgard was founded,” Loke replied, “the home of the Aesir. Many centuries ago it was little more than a large courtyard.”

  “Unbelievable,” Arvid said thoughtfully. “It’s been more than three hundred years, and Odin is still there. Were you there at the founding of Asgard?” She looked at Loke questioningly, but he just stared into the distance. Suddenly there was hardness in his eyes.

  “No,” he answered curtly.

  Shortly before noon the next day they finally approached Karst. Fog had raised and prevented a proper view of the city, but Arvid could see that it was much bigger than Erendal. The construction of the houses reminded her a little of those in Black Castle, even if they were broader and more robust and seemed to have somewhat flatter roofs.

  After they had left the large stone bridge behind them, Loke steered his mount next to Arvid’s.

  “The circle of protection is over there,” he said. “It’s pretty strong.”

  His words sparked a queasy feeling in Arvid. She had almost forgotten that the towns in the lowlands had circles of protection and how uncomfortable crossing them was. She still clearly remembered the pain the new circle around Vero-Maghen had caused her.

  “Couldn’t you just have kept that to yourself?” she said indignantly. “At least I wouldn’t be worried now.”

  To her annoyance Loke suddenly began to giggle.

  Arvid gave him a vicious look. “What’s so funny?”

  Loke shrugged, still a wide grin on his face that somehow didn’t seem to match his almost girlish appearance. “Usually I’m the only one,” he said airily. “In the past I have often been on the road with Thor or Odin, who thought my dislike of the circles to be immensely exhilarating.”

  “You don’t exactly lack pleasure in gloating over it,” Arvid said.

  “Would you rather have my pity?” said Loke and grimaced with mock regret. “I simply take the right to make fun of a pain I have to endure myself.”

  A
rvid rolled her eyes and decided to ignore Loke’s chatter. They had almost reached the circle of protection now. Arvid’s heart began to beat faster. It was anything but a pleasant feeling, to await a pain that you didn’t know how bad it would be.

  Loke was the first to reach the circle and his reaction startled Arvid so much that even though she clearly felt the electrifying pain, she dismissed it as almost inconsequential. Loke suddenly writhed violently and let out an agonizing cry, which he obviously couldn’t suppress despite his evident efforts. His face was a distorted mask of pain, and for a moment he staggered in the saddle so much Arvid instinctively reached out to steady him. However, hardly a second later, Loke tediously and heavily panting straightened up again.

  Arvid threw Nod an alarmed glance. The look in his eyes immediately made her realize that this wasn’t the first time he witnessed Loke’s response to a protection circle.

  “Are you okay?” said Arvid, concerned.

  Loke looked up at her and, to Arvid’s amazement, started to snicker again. The reaction was so incongruous and absurd that Arvid stared at him speechlessly. There had been many occasions when she had gotten the unsettling feeling Loke was a little crazy. But at this moment this impression was much more intense.

  “Of course I’m ‘okay’; it’s not like I’m still standing on the circle,” Loke said. “Have you ever tried that?”

  “Of course not! Why would I?”

  “Out of curiosity, perhaps? Pain exerts a kind of brutal inspiration—it’s highly intriguing.” His voice was icy. “Previously, this was Odin’s favorite punishment for me if I had messed something up or if he couldn’t find another scapegoat. Almost a bit disappointing that he’s gotten tired of that.”

  “Are you serious? Odin wanted you to stop on a circle of protection?”

  “Oh, he didn’t only want me to. It was easy for him to force me to do so. He’s a black mage, and the most powerful one I know.”

  Arvid was horrified. The mere idea of standing on a circle of protection for more than a brief moment was terrible. The idea of being detained there by force, without knowing when the pain would stop, gave her nausea. At the same time she suddenly remembered something she had read in a book in Vero-Maghen a few months back. She had dismissed it as a fairy tale because it had sounded so bizarre and unthinkable, but now she wasn’t so sure.

  “So it’s true that… that you were once tortured for three days?”

  Loke snorted gruffly. “Bullshit. Odin never thought it to be entertaining for more than a few hours. Nevertheless, plenty of time to explore all the dark corners of the soul that you otherwise never would have found, right?”

  Arvid would have liked to reply to that, but they had now reached the city gate, which was guarded by an exceptionally large number of armed soldiers, who scrutinized them in detail. Hastily Arvid made sure her hood concealed her hair thoroughly, but her concern proved to be unfounded. The guards seemed to be more interested in a horse-drawn cart loaded with goods, which was approaching the gate at a distance behind them.

  The city streets were crowded. Nod told Arvid that Karst had a huge market, well-known even outside of Jördendheim’s borders, that attracted traders and buyers from everywhere.

  They delivered their mounts to a long stable building near the city wall, along with the package of letters they had taken from Erendal. Then they lodged in a tiny, dark hostel where Loke announced that he had to take care of various matters for the rest of the day. Of course he didn’t want to offer any details. He sent Arvid and Nod off to the market to get the last things for their onward journey. The next morning he wanted to depart very early.

  “Don’t let anyone steal from you,” Loke said sternly, as he handed Arvid a small bag of money. “Keep off common rooms, and stay where there’s a lot of people. No personal conversations—people could recognize you.”

  The market was so crowded that Nod and Arvid were progressing only slowly. Every possible and impossible thing seemed to get offered, ranging from craft goods, fresh fruits and vegetables to live animals from all corners of the world. Music filled the air; jugglers and star lamp sellers were wandering around. Near the large fountain a merchant had an unimaginable variety of naturally glowing plants on display, some of them as tall as himself.

  It took Arid hours to buy everything Loke had told her. Among other things, she had acquired closed fur gaiters, mittens from lambskin and a thick fur-lined cloak of pale beige color. At first Arvid had inhibitions about spending so much money that did not even belong to her, even though she knew that Loke probably had plenty of it. Then Nod told her how high the school fees for one year at Vero-Maghen were, and the price of the clothes suddenly seemed ridiculous.

  They found a place on a brick ledge at a house wall in the back of the market, from where they could easily overlook the hustle and bustle from a certain height. Arvid’s feet hurt from the long wandering through the market, and now that she was sitting here with Nod and looked at the noisy crowd of people in front of them, an oppressive melancholy began to take hold of her.

  “I wish you could just come with us,” she said dejectedly. The thought of having to say goodbye to Nod tomorrow morning, probably forever, caused a burning pain in her heart. So far, she had repressed any thought about it.

  “I wouldn’t want that,” Nod said softly. “In the Ice Wastes there is nothing for me, and where you go, I can’t follow.”

  “And you shouldn’t. Your home is here. Maybe not in Karst, but… in this world. You belong in my world as little as I do in yours.”

  “I’ll probably stay here in the city for a while,” said Nod. “Maybe they need someone at the City Guard.”

  “I thought you don’t like that.”

  “Everyone has to live somehow. Karst is a trading town. They will need people who keep an eye on the merchants. It can’t hurt to speak several languages. Look, over there, there’s even dwarves here.”

  Arvid turned her head in wonder. She recognized a group of three short, broadly built men, who otherwise didn’t seem to be different. Since they quickly disappeared in the crowd, she had no opportunity to take a closer look, but now something else caught her eye.

  “Giants,” she murmured. There were two, a man and a woman, who made their way through the crowd with tense faces. They proceeded very slowly, even though the people respectfully moved out of their way, which was probably a good idea: Even the tall human men only reached up to their bellies. The two giants were wrapped in light, colorful clothes, had gray, matted hair and shimmering, silvery skin.

  “Always a fascinating sight,” Nod said, “although you regularly encounter them here in the north. But they rarely venture into the cities.”

  “I thought giants and humans were enemies.”

  “No, they haven’t been in a long time. They may not exactly be friends, but there has been peace between the two peoples for more than two hundred years. Although I must admit I don’t know much about them.”

  “They are a difficult people,” a voice suddenly said. Arvid turned around, startled. Nod also turned his head. Not far from them sat a plain-dressed man with a gray beard on the ledge. He held a large piece of bread in his hand. “Some of the oldest giants would like to eat humans for breakfast, that’s how much they despise them.” He laughed harshly and took a bite of his bread, which, however, did not prevent him from going on. “The thought is disturbing, isn’t it? Fortunately, this generation will soon be extinct. In my younger years I had a lot to do with them, but even after all this time I still think that they’re rather scary.”

  “I don’t get this impression,” said Arvid. “They seem to be quite peaceful.”

  “These two, yes,” said the bearded man, “but you’re not standing directly in front of them. It’s hard to stay relaxed, negotiating with someone from whom a simple slap can be deadly.” />
  “Are they that short-tempered?” said Arvid.

  Nod nudged her with his elbow, and although Arvid knew what he wanted to tell her, she could not restrain her curiosity.

  “No, not really,” replied the man, “but it still makes you worry and wonder… The giants have no appreciation or respect for ordinary people.” He took another bite of bread, chewed for a moment, then continued, “Without either physical size, power or wealth, you’re quickly dismissed as worthless by them.”

  Since Nod kept badgering her, they soon said goodbye to the man and made their way back to the hostel. In fact, they saw another giant on the way. He couldn’t just hide in the crowd like the dwarves.

  As much as Arvid wished this hour would never come, it was finally there. Loke woke them very early. They ate in complete silence before they packed up their things and Nod accompanied them to the street just outside the hostel. He would stay here and try to find work in Karst. Arvid could only hope that he would be happy here or elsewhere.

  All morning she had been fighting back tears. When Nod eventually hugged her goodbye, she could no longer restrain herself. She held him tightly and began to cry.

  “I’ll miss you so much, Nod,” she said, softly sobbing. “Never in my life I had a friend like you, and now I won’t even be able to write to you.”

  “Find your luck, Arvid,” whispered Nod, but his voice trembled. He gently stroked her hair, and when he finally pushed her away and looked at her, Arvid saw tears glistened in his eyes.

  “I’ll be happy here,” he said, but his eyes were full of sorrow. “You’ll see your mother again soon, your homeland. Your life and your happiness are out there waiting for you.”

  Arvid thought about her mother and her smile. She thought of her home and the view from the window, the street outside the cafe and the park through which she had walked almost daily. All this seemed so far away, like the fading memories of a dream. So much had happened. Arvid knew she could not allow herself to forget her home, forget who she really was and where she came from.