Fragments of your Soul (The Mirror Worlds Book 1)

  With difficulty she forced herself to nod. “You’re right,” she said in a trembling voice. “We must both look forward…”

  “Yes,” said Nod, then he put his arms around Arvid once again and held her close. “Take care,” he whispered. Before she could hug him back, he had released her, turned around with a jerk and ran away.

  The pain of seeing him go was unbearable. Arvid wanted to call him back, but then she realized that it would only make things worse. She feebly lowered her arms while she watched Nod disappearing inside the hostel. Tears ran down her cheeks, but at the same time a new feeling began to stir deep inside her. It was a gently burgeoning, dull determination, knowing that she wouldn’t let all this pain be in vain.

  A few hours later she and Loke left Karst and continued their journey on horseback, along the White River and farther north. The farther they went, the more difficult and rocky the landscape became. Soon the only trees were small groups of high pines that somehow looked unkempt and disheveled. Although the land was flat, they again and again rode over solid rock, which only here and there was relieved by patches of green.

  The river soon disappeared in a narrow canyon, which dug itself deeper and deeper into the ground. In reality, the terrain rose barely noticeably, and yet it seemed as if the water ate its way into the rock like acid, until it finally disappeared somewhere in the depths.

  Toward evening they found shelter in the shadow of a huge boulder and some bushes. Arvid’s mood had improved a bit in the last few hours, but now she felt the exhaustion of the long ride in her limbs. Although her body ached, it was a relief to stand on her own feet and to be able to take a few steps again. She wandered over to the canyon, but didn’t manage to see down to its bottom, and so she shortly afterwards returned to Loke. He sat at a safe distance from the fire, leaning against the rock and looking at the flames, unmoved.

  “Are we going to come across any settlements?” Arvid asked eventually, more to break the oppressive silence between them than out of real interest.

  “No,” Loke replied without looking up. “We soon reach the area where the border to the Ice Wastes moves. Hardly anyone wants to live there.”

  Arvid nodded thoughtfully. “It must be hard to see where the border is. The river cannot be seen from up here.”

  “Where exactly it is doesn’t matter,” Loke said. His face was still expressionless, but there seemed to be a hint of bitterness in his voice as he spoke. “The fact is, it previously lay much farther south. Even in summer, the water flowed under a layer of ice, all the way to Karst. Deep down in the darkness of the canyon the cold was preserved, even when the surrounding lands were warmed by the sun and appeared green and flourishing.”

  “Why not now?” said Arvid.

  “About three days’ journey upriver there is an underground spring. The arising water is piping hot. Previously it never reached the surface, but continued to flow underground. Today it unites with the White River farther down, though, and heats its water.”

  “I… see,” Arvid said. “But… didn’t you tell me that the treaty that defined the border was a ruse? If the source is to blame, how could it be a ruse then?”

  “Odin knew about it,” Loke said, looking at her now. In his dark eyes the flames of the campfire reflected, and yet they radiated an unsettling chill. “He had Noldir at his side, a god from the Island of Ashes, who was able to see behind things. It was an accidental discovery, and yet more than welcome. After the contract had been completed, Odin just needed to help it along a little, and all the land between Karst and the source fell to him, without him having to sacrifice even a single soldier.”

  “Noldir?” said Arvid puzzled.

  “Not that Noldir,” said Loke, “but his father, also a god. He is long dead, but his son is just like him.” He made a contemptuous sound. “He bows to Odin’s whims without resistance and gets involved in every one of his stupid ideas, without even thinking about it.”

  “So you were against it?”

  “Against what?”

  “Against this treaty, this ruse,” Arvid said. “You seem to be very angry about it.”

  For a moment, Loke stared at her in silence. Arvid wondered if she had said something wrong, because in Loke’s eyes she suddenly read a mixture of hardness and something dark, indefinable. Arvid could not tell exactly what it was. There was no anger, no hate, no pain, yet it had a touch of all of these feelings. In a disturbing way it reminded her of something that was also sleeping somewhere deep in her own soul.

  “I didn’t belong to Asgard back then,” Loke said finally and got up. “Get some sleep. I’ll go hunting.”

  “Hunting?” Arvid asked doubtfully. They had plenty of supplies and were not exactly equipped for hunting, but a moment later she realized that Loke meant something completely different.

  “Lacerate wild animals’ bodies, taste their blood and violently extinguish their lives,” he said in an icy voice. The look he gave Arvid was so thoroughly filled with darkness, it gave her the chills. A moment later Loke turned around and became a black, shaggy creature who silently disappeared into the night.

  The farther north they went, the steeper the terrain was and the faster the temperatures dropped. At first snow could only be seen in cracks and spots shielded from the sun, but when they took a break at noon of the third day, they were surrounded by a barren landscape of ice, snow, hard rock and scattered, sickly-looking firs. Arvid shivered despite her warm clothes, and her nose and cheeks were numb with cold.

  In front of them snow-capped mountain peaks had emerged. Their road was slowly but surely becoming more impassable and was increasingly littered with rocks and gaping cracks, so that their horses had more and more difficulty in finding a secure hold. Already in the early evening Arvid felt so exhausted that she urged Loke to find shelter somewhere and to rest for the night, but he refused.

  “Farther up there is a house I want to reach tonight,” he said. “There are hardly any protected places here and I’m more than tired of all your whining about the cold.”

  Arvid said nothing. She had no strength left to start a fight, because it would certainly develop into one in no time. Loke himself, of course, didn’t mind the cold, although he was wearing a comparatively light cloak and gloves. Arvid had noticed that his skin had taken on a silvery sheen, although he otherwise still looked human. Apparently temperatures had fallen so low that he couldn’t completely hide the adaptations of his body to the cold any longer.

  Arvid had never been so relieved to see lights appearing in the dark before them as this evening. The house to which they belonged was rather small, but the entire length of the roof was decorated with colored star lamps. From the massive chimney smoke rose up.

  “Ita is a friend of mine,” Loke said. “He only knows me as Beitir, so stick to it.”

  Arvid nodded. She felt so tired and weak that she seriously doubted she would still make it out of the saddle without help. She succeeded, but this simple maneuver seemed to use up even the last bit of strength in her body.

  Ita welcomed Loke effusively and had obviously been expecting him. He was a stocky man with a bushy beard and a pointed, crooked nose. As he went outside with Loke to accommodate the horses in the stable, Arvid was received by Ita’s wife Elsebe. She offered her a place in an armchair near the fire and brought her a large clay cup with something that turned out to be warm wine.

  “Our daughter Herdis is in bed; you must excuse her,” said Elsebe and sat down on a chair at the table. “She’s been plagued by pain for days.”

  “What’s wrong with her?” said Arvid.

  “Oh, she is with child,” said Elsebe, smiling. “I thought Beitir would have told you about it. It won’t be long… Her back always hurts so much that she sometimes can’t get up at all.”

  A little later Elsebe served a hearty
soup with meat and grain. Ita, who emptied one cup of wine after the other, was very talkative. Arvid learned that he dug out soul gems in nearby caves and took them to the market in Karst once a month. The business seemed to go well. He presented Loke a small cloth bag with “accidents”, as he called them, which he apparently had saved for him.

  Since Arvid didn’t want to risk saying anything that could embarrass Loke, she held back and listened only. From the conversation she learned that Loke had been coming past here regularly for many years. Ita believed that he was looking for rare plants and insect eggs in caves in the valley on the opposite side of the mountain range, and that they were used for remedies.

  Finally, the conversation turned to Herdis, who had not shown herself the whole evening.

  “I think we have two or three weeks until the child comes, certainly not more,” said Elsebe. “I made everything ready two months ago. Up here you’d rather not get surprised without all the necessary things. It’s a long way to Karst.”

  “You will raise the child here?” said Loke.

  “Yes, we have no other option,” said Ita. “Elsebe and I don’t mind; after all, we are doing well. In winter supplies might perhaps get a bit short, but in a few years the boy can lend me a hand at work.”

  Elsebe laughed heartily. “Ita! Maybe it’s a girl.”

  Ita made an unwilling noise and waved. “I’m sure it’s a boy, Elsebe, very sure. You know I always have this strange dream in which it’s clearly a boy.”

  “Does the father also live here?” Arvid asked cautiously.

  “Oh, a young man from Karst,” Elsebe answered a bit too quickly. She didn’t seem to blame her for the question, but looked a bit sad all at once. “Herdis and he wanted to get married, but then he disappeared without a trace. Perhaps something happened to him; we don’t know.”

  “I’m sorry,” Arvid said.

  “Don’t be,” said Ita. “She has still us, after all, and I’m looking forward to having a child in the house again soon. My sons have gone away decades ago. Only our oldest still lives nearby; he is a blacksmith down in Karst.” He took a long sip of wine and then wiped a drop off his chin. “What about you, do you have children?”

  Arvid smiled and shook her head. “No.”

  “How are your children, Beitir?” Elsebe asked now. “It’s been a while since you’ve last told us about them.”

  “They can take care of themselves,” Loke said. “I visited my youngest son in the Temple City a few weeks ago. He doesn’t want for anything. My other sons I see seldom, they are… querulent.”

  “Ah, I know,” said Ita. “But men tend to be like that, and that’s a good thing. When they grow up, they often become strong-headed and difficult. They want to find their own path in life.”

  Since the small house had only two rooms, Elsebe prepared two sleeping places in the living room. No sooner had their hosts retreated, Arvid lay down on the soft furs. Loke sat at the table. From tired eyes Arvid watched as he emptied the little bag which Ita had given to him on the table. It was filled with tiny colored stones, probably soul gems. Loke began to inspect them closely. He sorted and pushed them around on the table, but the soft, scratchy noise he caused was so lulling that Arvid soon fell asleep.

  The next morning Elsebe packed them fresh provisions, while Ita slipped them a small leather bottle with schnapps against the cold. Arvid was told that they would continue from here on foot. Allegedly, the way through the mountains was too arduous for the horses, so that they would move more easily without the animals.

  For the first time they now met Herdis, who seemed to feel a little better. She was still very young, pale and silent, but very polite. Her belly was big and round, and Arvid did not doubt for a second that Elsebe was right that the child would be born soon. She could not imagine this petite woman withstanding this weight for much longer.

  When they were leaving, Ita escorted them outside. “The upper bridge at the waterfall is broken in one place; you should be careful,” he warned them.

  Loke nodded. “Thanks for the warning—and for the hospitality.” He reached into his pocket and put something into Ita’s hand. Arvid saw that it was two gold coins.

  “For Herdis’ child,” Loke said. “Maybe the next winter won’t be as mild as the last one.”

  “I can’t possibly accept this!” Ita said with wide eyes. “I don’t earn that much during a whole summer.”

  “Take it as a payment for the stones,” said Loke. “No child should go hungry in this country.”

  After Ita had thanked Loke least ten times, he finally accepted the money. He stopped at the door and looked after them until they entered a narrow, steep path and his view was obstructed by sharp towering crags. There was hardly any wind, but still it was bitterly cold, and a few snowflakes were falling.

  Arvid now understood why they went on on foot. Their horses wouldn’t have made it very far. The ground was rough, rocky and steep, and several times they almost had to climb on all fours to get ahead. More than once their path seemed to be part of a solid frozen creek.

  Around noon they reached a flat spot that was shielded by rocks on one side. Here they rested, but even though there was no wind in the niche, Arvid was freezing.

  Loke took a short walk around the plateau and stopped at the foremost tip for a while. Then he returned to Arvid and sat down on a patch of snow, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

  “I did not want to disturb you unnecessarily,” he said, “but it’s better if you know that we are being followed. We need to continue soon.”

  Arvid was shocked. “Who’s following us?”

  “Gods Odin has sent to find us. I heard there were nine, but so far I can only see two. Maybe they’ve split up. They have been following us since Karst, but they have caught up more quickly than I had expected.”

  “But how… do you know all this?” said Arvid.

  “I have my contacts in Karst,” Loke said. “Unfortunately Odin responded quickly when he heard the news from Erendal. At first I wasn’t sure how soon they would catch up with us, but in animal form, I can smell them…”

  “This is crazy. All this just to upset your plans?”

  “My plans?” Loke asked, amused. “This is not about me. I’m just protecting a woman, of whose innocence I am convinced. Odin doesn’t know about my plan; I’m no more than a nuisance. He wants you.”

  Arvid stared at him and felt a nagging fear rise in her. Of course she had known for months that Asgard was looking for her, but she had never really expected that the gods would find her. The country was almost limitless and they had largely moved through remote areas. In addition, Arvid had relied on Loke’s knowledge and skill. To hear that there were two gods on their track came as a shock.

  “Perhaps we better go,” she said and hastily pushed herself up from the hard, icy rock. “I don’t think I want to find out if they want to imprison or… or kill me.”

  Loke nodded and rose also. He patted the snow off his trousers and went without further delay toward the steep path leading upward. “I’ll tell you the plan on the go. We may have to improvise.”

  “But we are still days away from the Hail Peak,” Arvid said, hastening to keep up with him.

  “The Hail Peak doesn’t interest us,” said Loke. “We’re going to the hot spring I told you about.”

  Arvid was too upset to resent the fact that Loke had apparently deliberately told her a false destination. After what she had learned the past few days, she thought she knew what Loke was up to, even if she didn’t understand the motives.

  “You want to do something with the source, don’t you?” she said. “You want the river to freeze again, all the way down to Karst, just like before, right?”

  “Yes.”

  “But why?”

  “T
hat’s none of your concern! The world transition I want to create for this purpose will be able to bring you back to your world. But we only have a time slot of about three days, and it’s still too early. If we try as soon as we get there—and we may have to—the light conditions are not optimal.”

  While they continued their way up along a path of ice, studded with sharp-edged boulders, Loke explained to her how a world transition formed, how to consciously create one, and what Arvid would have to do in this process. It was confusing and complicated. After a short time Loke’s patience was almost exhausted, as Arvid kept asking him questions over and over again. But very slowly she began to understand. She realized that it was actually impossible to create a world transition alone. It was essential that two white mages combined their forces and almost simultaneously created a perfect image of the other’s light structure. The temporal scope was so small that someone without the gift of time bending did not stand the slightest chance of reacting that quickly.

  Toward the evening they reached a windy pass, but they did not stop, though Arvid was on the brink of exhaustion. They went on and began the descent on the other side, which was almost more difficult than the ascent. Arvid slipped constantly and soon felt stabbing pain in her knees and ankles.

  It was late at night when they reached a sheltered spot with a kind of cave and Loke let her know that they would rest here.

  “Get some sleep,” he said. He sounded calm, but Arvid could feel that he was nervous. “I’ll run back a bit to find out who they are and how much time we have.”

  Although Arvid was terribly cold and was still plagued by fear, she was so exhausted that she fell asleep in a corner of the niche in no time.