Divided

by Rae Brooks

  Calis laughed quietly. “No—well, with women, but it was different.”

  “That was… that felt…amazing,” Kilik lamented. Calis’s hands traced back up Kilik’s chest, though, finding the boy’s neck. Kilik grunted, in a strange, uncertain sound—and then pulled himself up and pressed his lips to Calis’s.

  Calis had the fleeting thought that he shouldn’t kiss Kilik so soon after he’d had the come in his mouth, but as Kilik didn’t seem open to suggestions, he returned it. The quivering boy in his arms was still causing Calis’s heart to accelerate. As they pulled apart, Kilik moved his unsteady hands to Calis’s waist and yanked at his pants. They fell away without much force with a lack of belt.

  Calis’s fingers caressed Kilik’s back gently, and then through some series of events, Kilik was on his stomach. The bruise pulled into Calis’s vision, and in a moment, he knelt to kiss it without any of the passion that he’d kissed the other areas. He kissed it gently, softly, and then he moved his mouth to the rest of Kilik’s back. His back was much the same as the rest of him, soft, tight, and sweet. Calis paused halfway through one of his kisses, pausing to breathe softly into Kilik’s back. “You’re trembling,” he murmured.

  “It feels good,” Kilik whimpered.

  An entirely new arousal spread through Calis, and his lips found the side of Kilik’s neck affectionately. Calis’s fingers continued to move obligingly over Kilik’s back, dropping after a moment below the waist to skin much smoother. When Kilik pushed himself up onto his hands and knees, Calis felt another desire pressing on his mind. “Do you want me to—?”

  “Yes,” Kilik moaned before Calis had fully formed the question.

  Suddenly, Calis’s already too-quick heartbeat accelerated further. Kilik wanted this and yet Calis could feel nervousness forming in his own body. “I don’t want to force it,” he said gently. “I’m going to ease you into this.”

  “I have no idea how,” Kilik said, trying to retain a calm voice. He failed, but the attempt was positively adorable.

  Calis moved his hands over the smooth skin and then took a breath. He wasn’t going to hurt Kilik—of that much he was confident. “Tell me if it hurts,” he said softly.

  “Yeah,” Kilik agreed gently.

  For some odd reason, Calis laughed again and Kilik made a disgruntled sound. “I wish you understood how badly I want you right now. I feel like I’m going to burst.”

  “I think I get it,” Kilik said knowledgably.

  The thought was reassuring, to say the least. Though, Calis wasn’t sure that Kilik could feel the insatiable need and want that he felt for Kilik. Very gently, very cautiously, he eased a finger into Kilik as slowly as he could. Kilik’s body clenched immediately, though he said nothing to stop Calis from going further. Moving his finger in the slightest caused Kilik to cry out, though. “Hurt?” Calis asked at once.

  “No,” Kilik said, “just feels, uh… different.”

  “You seem tense.”

  “I wonder why,” Kilik said cynically. Calis laughed again, and then he eased another finger in as slowly as the first. Kilik reacted in a similar fashion, though he did seem to be relaxing a little bit. With the last finger, Kilik’s body seemed to have quelled itself just a little. Calis let Kilik adjust for a moment before he removed them, glancing to see the look on Kilik’s face. His face was pinched in uncertainty, and the look was, again, endearing. Kilik never looked anything but that, though.

  “You’re sure?” Calis asked cautiously. He did not want to force Kilik into this, despite how badly his body demanded that he do so at once.

  Kilik let out a low groan. “Yes! I am!” He was clearly frustrated, probably due to the fact that the anticipation appeared to be getting to him.

  “You know I’m going to be bigger than that,” Calis reminded the boy dutifully.

  Kilik let out a quiet laugh. “You’re about to be inside me—you don’t have to keep boasting, your highness.” Calis returned the laugh gently, but he supposed he ought to take that as Kilik’s unbarred permission.

  Moving his body upwards, Calis placed his hands on either of Kilik’s hips, running his fingers over them tenderly, feeling them with reverence. Then, with a decisive thrust of his own hips, Calis could feel himself inside of Kilik. The closeness of it shot through him like an arrow and he gasped in shock. Kilik was tense so that his skin around Calis was dizzying. With considerable effort, Calis managed to speak. “Are you… alright?”

  “Yes, you can stop asking,” Kilik replied sweetly.

  With another movement, Calis pushed himself a little deeper into Kilik, and this time he was the one that let out a quiet grunt. Unable to pause, he moved again, rhythmic but slow—from sheer force of will. He kept the motion steady, careful to keep his hands on Kilik’s hips, moving his fingers along them obligingly. Kilik’s body was moist from sweat, and Calis’s fingers were slippery with it as well. He panted with effort as he felt Kilik’s body moving beneath him. His breathing sped, and the intense feeling of pleasure shot through him in synapses, more and more, until he thought he might collapse. His body wound so tightly around the core of pleasure that he couldn’t bite back his own moans.

  Kilik murmured something unintelligible, and Calis watched his face curiously through all but blurring vision. “Go… faster…” Kilik panted.

  Calis obliged immediately, as he had been taking careful steps to make sure that his body didn’t go the pace that it wanted to set for itself. He still remained in control, but his body moved more on its own, and with every thrust, there was a swell of dizzy intoxication. The physical pleasure of it was drowning him, Kilik’s body pressing against him so thoroughly—and the thought, the sight, the sound, the feel, the reality of Kilik, panting with sweat, in all his perfection—it was too much. “Calis!” Kilik cried desperately.

  Grinding his teeth together against his name being called so passionately, Calis pushed himself deeper, finally giving in to his body so that it moved as it wanted within Kilik. The clench of the muscles around Calis’s length was causing his blood to boil and his fingers to curl in anticipation. But very diligently, he worked his own hands around to the front of Kilik, finding the boy’s own hard erection—impressive, all things considered—without much effort.

  His hands moved along it tenderly, stroking and cradling with as much prowess as his clouded mind would allow him. If Kilik was this ready, then Calis could make himself and Kilik twice as satisfied. It was enough, and he felt Kilik break again. Kilik’s surprised moan pushed Calis one step too far, then, and he pushed one last time against Kilik’s small body. He let out a gasp, panting for air as he could feel the release inside of Kilik. Exhaustion prickled up his spine at the release, and as soon as he pulled out of Kilik, he collapsed on the grass beside him.

  Sweat dampened his entire body, and he glanced across to see that Kilik had collapsed onto the grass as well. Their eyes met and there was a satisfied glimmer in Kilik’s that made Calis smile. The feel against his body had left him with the hum of further arousal, but his exhaustion tried to put it to rest. Still, though, he reached out his hands and very protectively pulled Kilik against his chest, cradling him, despite the way his fingers slipped over the skin.

  Kilik was soaked with sweat, and his body moved in silent cadence to his panting, which seemed to match up nicely with Calis’s. “I think…” Calis ventured warily, “that I might be falling in love with you.”

  The body against his pulled a little tighter to him and Kilik made the faintest of sounds. The glow of the flowers, Calis noticed, did wonders for Kilik’s damp skin. “You shouldn’t do that,” Kilik offered unhelpfully. Calis just laughed, as there was not a bloody thing he could do to stop it.

  Kilik moved his head to rest against Calis’s chest, and Calis could feel sleepiness pulling at his own consciousness. Kilik was falling asleep too, he realized. “Kilik,” he whispered, “put your clothes on—you’ll get a fever.”

  Somehow, Calis managed to help Ki
lik reassemble his clothes, though putting the wet pants back on may not have been the best idea. Then, Calis replaced his own clothes and finally pulled Kilik to him protectively. He was certain that the smaller boy was asleep before they’d fully settled on the grass the second time. “Kilik,” Calis said gently, to no one.

  Then, Kilik stirred and responded in the strangest way. “Calis,” he said, and it sounded as though he was waiting for a response.

  “What is it?” Calis asked.

  “Me too,” he said, with a soft whine in his voice. Calis didn’t need to be reminded of before they’d put their clothes back on to know precisely to what Kilik was referring m. The thought was terrifying and euphoric at the same time.

  Rather than answering, Calis pulled Kilik to him a little tighter and embraced the body against him solicitously. Within moments of listening to Kilik’s gentle breathing, feeling the warmth of his body against Calis’s—Calis found himself pulled into a peaceful sleep.

  When next he woke, sun shone into his eyes rudely. His eyelids fluttered at the light, and he squeezed them again to try to remove it. When the light seemed to remain through his closed eyelids, he opened his eyes again. Only then did he realize how tangled he’d become with the boy he’d been holding as they slept. If they had been close before they’d slept, they could now be mistaken for one body. Kilik’s head was resting on Calis’s chest, and the fingers of two of their hands were entwined together. Calis’s other arm was draped over Kilik’s waist, and their legs were knotted together. Calis laughed silently. Even in his sleep, he couldn’t stay away from Kilik.

  He knew he ought to wake Kilik so that they could return, as the young man’s foster family would be worried—but watching Kilik sleep was fascinating. Nevertheless, it only required watching him for a moment, for Calis to realize there was a look of terror etched into Kilik’s face. Then, as Calis noticed the look grow more and more fearful, Kilik began to whimper. And not the soft, passionate whimpers from last moon—no, these were terrified, frightened whimpers.

  Suddenly, Kilik spoke, with a quiet, wavering voice. “No, no, no… please… let me fix it… I can fix it…” Then, he tensed, as though whoever he spoke to in the dream had grabbed him. For some reason, Calis glanced to Kilik’s slightly exposed wrist. A bruise there seemed to, quite literally, be growing as Calis watched it.

  Panic shot through Calis, and he gasped, shaking Kilik as gently but severely as he could. After a few moments, Kilik’s eyelids began to flutter, the fear began to die down, and the bruise seemed to stop growing. “Kilik!” Calis cried.

  Moments later, the fluttering of Kilik’s eyelids gave way to the blue irises—filled with uncertainty and fear. Eventually, the irises found Calis, and Kilik whimpered, biting down on his lip, and ducked his head. When he said nothing, Calis spoke fiercely. “You were having a nightmare. Kilik, what was that? What happened?”

  That was no mere nightmare, Calis realized. Nightmares didn’t cause your wrist to bruise. Perhaps there was something seriously wrong with Kilik—that or there was something more dangerous at work. “I-I just had a nightmare,” Kilik said unconvincingly.

  “Your wrist!” Calis yelped. “Your wrist was bruising while you were sleeping! Tell me, Kilik! What is the matter?”

  Kilik shied away from him, and they worked to untangle themselves from each other. When Kilik finally unknotted himself, though, Calis moved forward and grabbed him by the shoulders. “Answer me, Kilik! If something is happening to you, you have to tell me. Please. After that—after last moon—after… I can’t… I can’t lose you,” he cried, and his voice broke over the words.

  Kilik seemed actually affected this time, and his eyes burned with worry as they bore into Calis’s. Kilik was worried about Calis—when he’d just had a nightmare so terrifying it had physically harmed him. “Lately, I’ve been having these nightmares… It’s been… I’m sure it’s nothing, but they follow me—I can hear the voices from them when I’m awake. Telling me I’ve failed, and that I’m worthless, I…” He jerked his head to the side. “This isn’t your problem.”

  “It’s more my problem than you will ever know. You should have said something. Have you told Juliet?” Calis asked harshly.

  Kilik shook his head warily, and then he began to chew on his lip. “I don’t think it’s anything that she can help with,” he assured Calis. Calis growled, and his heart began to pound uncertainly. If Juliet couldn’t help—then what was Kilik saying? Someone would fix this, if Calis had to travel all of Elyst to find them!

  “What are the dreams about?” Calis asked, working to ensure that his worried thoughts didn’t prohibit him from being helpful.

  Kilik opened his mouth to respond, but then his eyes widened and his eyes glazed over—as if he were seeing something in the distance. “Kilik!” Calis whimpered. “Kilik, what’s wrong?” His heart felt torn, broken, and he thought that he might die in the meadow—now. His heart was surely about to burst in his chest, or rather, in his throat—as that was where it was had gotten to with all the commotion.

  “I can… it’s…” Kilik leapt to his feet without warning, and he jerked his head to the side and sprinted away from Calis with undeniable purpose.

  Calis jerked up to his own feet, yanked his sword from the ground where he’d left it, and followed Kilik as best as he could. The boy moved through the trees, quickly, and without pause, as though he was possessed. “Stop! Kilik!” Calis shouted from the few paces behind him as they both moved through the trees.

  They kept moving, and Kilik showed no signs of stopping. Calis had just decided that he would have to catch Kilik himself and make him stop, right before the boy reached a stop. They had left most of the trees, though some of them still dotted the far surrounding area. Calis caught Kilik by the arms, and tears burned in his eyes as he did. “Kilik! Talk to me! Are you alright?”

  Kilik blinked at him, and suddenly, he began shaking his head in panic. He kept shaking his head, but he did leap forward and wring his arms around Calis’s neck, sobbing hysterically. “I can’t make it stop. It follows me everywhere. It keeps saying that I’m going to be the reason that everyone dies—that I shouldn’t… I don’t know if I’m supposed to die to save everyone, or if—I don’t… I’m not crazy, I swear I’m not crazy,” he sobbed quietly into Calis’s chest.

  If Calis was sure of one thing, it was that Kilik was not at all crazy. He wrapped his arms around his crying lover and shushed him with gentle words. “You aren’t crazy,” Calis whispered. “But we have to figure out what is doing this to you.”

  Kilik drew in a shocked breath, and then his head pulled away from Calis’s chest as he regarded the prince with awe. “You aren’t going to drag me to some prison, are you? I’ve tried so hard to ignore this—to tell myself it’s just in my head, but I can’t make it stop. Don’t…”

  Calis let out a low snarl and pulled Kilik back to him. “I’m not going to take you anywhere. I am going to stay with you and help you figure out what is causing this.”

  “Thank you,” Kilik whimpered.

  For a few moments, Calis simply held Kilik, soothing him, holding him with the arms that only a lover could offer. He breathed gently, whispering softly against Kilik’s hair. He would figure out what was happening to Kilik, and he would not let whatever it was hurt him—he would protect Kilik. Of that he was certain. “I’m going to keep you safe. I promise. I promise I will keep you safe,” he whispered gently.

  After another few moments, Kilik seemed to have relaxed, and then—almost simultaneously—they both tensed. It was as if their affection had prevented them from feeling it, and when they had released, knowing that they had to return to Telandus—they were able to fully feel what was with them. Calis’s head moved to the field, and he found at the far end of it sat a black, eroded structure. It wasn’t a tree, but it seemed to grow like one. It was black, with odd purple crystals growing on the sides of it. It seemed to be sucking the life out of the area in which it sat. “Was
that in your nightmare?” Calis asked softly.

  “Yes,” Kilik answered breathlessly. “It’s real,” he choked. It was nothing but a blackened, burnt tree with an outer shell of a purple obelisk. Though, the black thing was too slight to be a tree, and its branches seemed more like tendrils, wrapping around a single base. The purple was what appeared to be sucking the life out of the area, though there was far less of the purple than the black.

  They both started towards it mutely, after all, leaving it once Kilik had run so desperately to it seemed counterproductive. As they got closer, Calis could feel it more than see it sucking the life out of the area. The black hummed with energy, and the purple seemed to be pulsing with quiet thievery. Calis’s grip on his sword tightened, and his eyes moved up to the thing.

  There was a calling, then. A million voices came together in a chorus, coaxing him to touch the thing. He could hear the whisper in his ear. Touch it… touch it. You’ll understand if you touch it. The words kept flowing, and Calis’s eyes widened as he tilted his head just slightly. Tentatively, he reached out a hand to touch it.

  Kilik yelped, grabbing Calis’s hand and pulling him back. The whispers vanished in an instant. “No, Calis! Don’t!” he screamed, with urgent fervor. Not about to go against Kilik’s advice on the matter, Calis picked up a small stone near his feet and tossed it. The moment it touched the black, it eroded, crumpling to the ground like dust.

  Calis found himself infinitely glad that Kilik had stopped him from touching the abomination. Then, though, he heard Kilik’s pained, terrified breath. “I can hear it! No! Calis…” He cried in anguish.

  Then, in a moment of uncertainty, Calis grabbed Kilik and pulled him into a fervent kiss. His lips claimed Kilik’s warm ones passionately, and when he pulled away, Kilik was blinking.

  “Kilik. Look at me. Stay with me, now,” Calis whispered.

  “Th-thank you,” Kilik answered, sounding more than a little shocked.