by Tyler Grey
I looked up at the ceiling and thought about the boxes that would be going out to a set of strangers. It was weird to think that all these people would have something of my mother’s. In a way, the thought cheered me up. The idea that so many people were going to be blessed by my mother made me happy. If there was anyone that knew how to spread joy, it was her.
Tears fell down my face once more as I remembered all the times I had with her. Had I been a good daughter? I cringed as I thought of all the fights we had and all the arguments that had started because of me. She’d been the most incredible person in my life, but I’d let her down so many times. I hadn’t been surprised to find out that Henry had given me the job because of my mother. I wasn’t angry at all because it was exactly the sort of thing she would do. She was always looking out for me, and always putting me first.
One of the things I had found in the house was a photo of the two of us. I have no idea where the photo was taken, but I looked to be about four years old. She was dancing and holding me in her arms, and the two of us were laughing. It was my favorite photo, and I would forever cherish it. I was going to find a frame for it and put it up so that I could look at it every day. I no longer wanted to hide from the memories of her. I wanted to remember her every single day and remind myself how lucky I was to have had her.
Memories of Henry came to me, too, and I couldn’t wait for the day my TV arrived. It was easy not to think of him at work, but not so easy at home. I wished I wasn’t still in love with him, but I wasn’t sure if that feeling would ever truly go away.
I was in love with a man that I had once tried so hard not to be with — a man who was no longer my stepbrother, but a man who had almost died in the same way that both my parents had died. A man I was too afraid to get close to. Every time I thought about calling him, I would remember how it felt to be in that hospital room and to not know if he would ever open his eyes again.
I lay flat out on the floor, trying to figure out what to do with my day, when my phone rang. As usual lately, my heart beat a thousand miles per hour whenever my phone rang. Although, I wasn’t sure why I always assumed it was going to be Henry, especially after I had made it pretty clear that I didn’t want to talk to him again. Of course, it wasn’t Henry. Olive’s name flashed on the screen.
“Hello, I’m glad you called,” I said.
“You are? Is everything okay?” she asked, and I immediately felt bad. Poor Olive was always worried about me.
“Yeah, everything is fine. I’m just battling a bit.”
“Did something happen or are you just feeling down?”
“A bit of both, actually. I took a bunch of my mom’s belongings to Goodwill. I’ve been meaning to do it for a while now, and I finally went out and did it. The lady was so happy I had brought so much stuff. I even have more to take, but I got the bulk of it down. It was both rewarding and difficult at the same time.”
“Oh, Paisley, I’m so sorry. That must’ve been so hard. You should’ve told me. I would’ve come with you. You didn’t have to do this on your own. Hell, you don’t have to ever do anything on your own. You know that.”
“Nah, it’s okay. It was something I needed to do. Thank you, though. I know you would’ve come with me.”
“She would be proud of you for doing that, you know.”
I smiled. “I know. I think so, too. So, what’s up? Just calling to check up on me?”
“Not quite.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, I just wanted to make sure that you were home.”
I frowned. “Of course, I’m home. Where else would I be?”
“Good. Do me a favor: take a shower, put on some nice clothes, and do it right now.”
“Why? Are you coming to whisk me away on a great adventure?” I asked with a laugh.
“Not quite. Just do what I said. Okay?”
“You’re really not going to tell me?”
“Nope. You’ve got half an hour.”
“For what?” I asked, but she’d already put down the phone.
What the hell? I almost didn’t do it, but it was nice to have something to do even if I had no idea why. I figured Olive was coming to take me out for dinner. That was probably why she was grinning all day. She’d been talking about going to a new restaurant she’d found for ages, but it was so difficult to get a reservation. Maybe she’d finally managed to get one for the two of us. I wasn’t sure how much I felt like going out, but I got changed regardless. When I was showered, and changed, I paced impatiently around the room. I was just about to call Olive to ask her what was happening, when I heard a knock on the door.
“So, where are-”
I stopped. It wasn’t Olive. It was Henry. Handsome Henry. I stood there, staring at him, trying to figure out if it was real.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Henry
Shawn dropped me off at Paisley’s new apartment the moment he got the go ahead from Olive. I could tell Paisley had not been told it was going to be me at the door by the way her face changed from happy to surprised. After that, I couldn’t tell if she was pleased to see me or not.
I also couldn’t tell if she was going to slam the door in my face, but I stuck my crutch inside and pushed my way in just in case. There was no way I was not going to get the chance to talk to her. Just one look at her beautiful face made me realize just how much I missed her, and just how much I was willing to fight for something that I knew was right. How could something like this be wrong?
“Henry? What-”
I didn’t give her the chance to finish. “No, let me talk. I need to say a few things before I lose my nerve. Paisley, I’m so in love with you. Obviously, it wasn’t love at first. It was lust. Pure and honest lust. Then, when you wanted nothing to do with me, it became a challenge. I wanted nothing more than to see if I could get you. Man, you were stubborn. But every single day that I got to know you, I started to like you more.
“Eventually, it became obvious to me that I liked you more than I cared to admit. I liked everything about you. I liked your passion for life, your feistiness, your stubbornness, your willingness to work hard. I thought you were the funniest, sweetest, and most interesting person that I had ever met. Nothing like some of the other girls I had been with before. And, of course, I thought you were beautiful. Sexy, but pretty at the same time.” I paused and took a deep breath.
“Then, when our parents died, I got to know another side to you. I quickly moved from wanting to be with you, to wanting to protect you. I wanted to be with you, too, obviously, but just knowing you were okay was more important to me. I moved from liking you to loving you without even realizing it, and I knew that I wanted more out of this. We never got a chance to speak about it, but it was always on my mind. I was just waiting for the right time. I didn’t want to rush things too quickly — we’d already been through so much.
“The morning I got into my accident, I was with a client on the golf course, and I bagged one of the biggest deals of my life. You know about that now. But what you don’t know is that the first thing I wanted to do was to tell you. All I could think about was how excited I was to celebrate with you. That’s when I realized how much I loved you because nothing else mattered to me.
“I drove to work, excited to share the news with you. Then…” I gulped. “Then a truck hit me, and I woke up in a hospital with you sleeping on the chair next to me. At that moment, I knew once again how much I loved you. I cannot tell you how good it was to see you. Then — just like that — you were gone.”
“Henry, I…” Tears were streaming down her face. I hated that I had made her cry, but it was good to at least see some emotion on her face. It was so much better than the emptiness that had been in her lately. I could see the wall she had built come crumbling down around her. But before I could hold her, I needed to know more.
“Paisley, do you have any idea how it felt when you didn’t come back to see me?”
“I called…” she said
in a timid voice.
I smiled sadly. “I thought that might’ve been you. But you didn’t come to see me, and then when I got home, you decided to move out and stop working with me. I understand you wanting to move out, and I understand that you never wanted to work there permanently. But how could you just leave me in my time of need when I was there for you?
“Why, Paisley? That’s all I want to know. I can’t beg you to come back to me, but I can ask you why you left me. Why you gave up on us. I deserve to know the truth. Surely you can understand that.”
Paisley fell to the floor, her face in her hands as she wept. I sat down next to her, but I didn’t touch her or interrupt her. I let her cry. Eventually, she looked up at me, her face wet from the tears.
“You’re right. You do deserve to know the truth.” She took a deep breath before continuing. “I… I love you.”
The words took me completely by surprise. “You do?”
“I love you,” she again. “Oh, Henry, I do. I love you. That is the reason why I left. When I saw you there in the hospital, I realized how close I was to losing you. I’d already lost my mother, and my father, both to car accidents. It seemed so cruel that the same thing almost happened to you. I couldn’t believe it. I mean, it’s not fair.
“I didn’t want to go through that all again. I couldn’t bear to lose you. I just couldn’t. I walked out of that hospital and decided that I was going to push you out of my life. New job, new apartment, new life. That way, I didn’t have to get hurt again.
“I know I hurt you with what I did. It was the worst thing that I’ve ever done in my life, but I only did it because I didn’t want to ever love anyone again. I figured I’d build this wall around me and I would just concentrate on my career. I thought it would be better for both of us.”
I couldn’t believe that was the reason. I had thought of a million different things, but this had not been one of them. All I could hear were the words “I love you” echoing over and over again.
“Oh, Paisley. You’re not getting rid of me that easily. You do realize that I’m not leaving, don’t you? I’m here to stay.”
She shook her head. “No, you can’t. You have to move on. I have to move on. It’s the only way.”
“What is that saying…it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. Something like that. Don’t you agree with that?”
“I don’t know.”
I smiled and took her hand. The moment her skin was against mine, I knew I was never going to give up on her. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m not going to leave you. I love you too much.”
“Henry,” she said through her tears. “I’m so sorry. I’m sorry for not caring for you when you were in pain. Watching you hobble around the house like that. It was… It was hard to watch. I wanted to help you. I really did. I thought I was doing what was right. I knew that if I gave in and came to help you, I would never be able to walk away from you again. I had to keep my distance. God, Shawn must really hate me. I felt so bad that he met me under those circumstances. I was grateful that he was there for you, though.”
“Yeah, he’s not so impressed with you,” I admitted. “Although, he is the one that suggested I talk to you, and he is the one that dropped me off tonight.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I think he could see how miserable I was without you. I haven’t been the nicest person. I’ve been snapping at everyone I come across. Especially at work, and even at him. It hasn’t been pleasant for anyone.
“You know, the pain was bad,” I said. “But not nearly as bad as not being with you. That was the thing that hurt the most. Maybe I should’ve fought harder to keep you, but I’m glad I’m here now. I never want to be anywhere else.”
“You’re really not going anywhere?” she said with a small grin.
The grin was all I needed to see to know that I had done the right thing. It was all I needed to know that everything was going to be okay. I shook my head. “Nope. I’m here to stay, baby.”
She pulled a face. “Baby? Since when do you call me that?”
I laughed. “Okay, let me try again. I’m here to stay, darling.”
“Nope. Not good,” she said and chuckled.
“I’m here to stay, sexy.”
“Hmm, not bad. Needs some work.”
“I’m here to stay, girlfriend.”
She grinned. “Ooh, I like the sound of that one.”
“Oh yeah? Does that mean you’re my girlfriend now?”
“If you’ll have me.”
“Oh, I’ll definitely have you.” I leaned in to kiss her. There were still tears on her face, and I kissed off each one of them. When our lips touched, it was like coming home again. My entire body responded to her.
“Oh, man, I’ve missed you so much. I didn’t think we’d ever do that again.”
“I’ve missed you, too.” I looked around her place. I’d been so focused on her that I hadn’t realized that there was no furniture. “Uh, where is all your stuff?”
She laughed. “My stuff is here. I mean, all my boxes are here. The furniture is being delivered tomorrow. I ordered it online before you got here.”
“Wow. So, where the hell have you been sleeping?”
She pointed to a sleeping bag in the corner of the room. “In that.”
“You’ve been sleeping in that? That, uh, doesn’t exactly scream comfortable.”
“Yeah, it’s not. Not at all. My back is killing me.”
I laughed. “Oh, Paisley. Why didn’t you come and get a bed from the house? Or at least a mattress?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. I was trying to avoid you. And, I haven’t really been caring much about anything lately. I figured I deserved the pain.”
“You do not deserve the pain. Do you know what you deserve?”
“What?”
“Me,” I said and grinned.
“Oh, I was hoping you were going to say ice cream,” she teased.
“Well, how about me first and then ice cream?”
“Oh, now there’s a plan,” she said and leaned in again.
“This time, though, I really am going to need your help,” I said as I pointed to the cast on my leg. I wasn’t exactly as mobile as I would have liked.
She smiled. “I’d be happy to help.”
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Paisley
There wasn’t really a great place for Henry and me to have sex, but after waiting for so long, there was also no way that either of us were going to wait anymore. I took his hand and helped him up, and then I did my best to create some sort of soft landing on the floor. I opened up the sleeping bag and found two blankets from a box. I had to rummage around quite a bit, which was very frustrating, but I eventually found them.
It took Henry that entire time to take off his clothes, and then I gingerly helped him to the floor. While he lay there, wearing only his cast, I undressed. I almost went to the bathroom, but he begged me not to. He said that he hadn’t seen me in such a long time, and all he wanted was to see me again. So I took off my clothes and watched as he got more and more excited. I was wearing red panties again, which he clearly loved. With my clothes finally off, I lay down on the makeshift bed with him. It wasn’t the most comfortable place in the world, but I didn’t care.
We kissed for a long time — mostly because we didn’t want the moment to end — and it felt so good to be back together again. I’d forgotten how soft his lips were, and what a good kisser he was. Well, I hadn’t forgotten, but the memory had been fuzzy because I’d tried so hard not to think about it.
There was very little that Henry could do with the cast on his leg, and it gave me the chance to totally take control. I had a good time teasing him. I ran my finger over his broad chest and moved I down, down, down, until he groaned for more. I kept teasing him, though, not fully touching him.
“Please, Paisley,” he begged. “More.”
I grinned and moved down to put him in my mouth.
I circled his tip with my tongue and then sucked with more vigor, right up to the point when he was about to come. Then I pulled away and climbed on top of him. Unfortunately, I moved my hand too quickly and hit him in the ribs. He winced in pain, and then we both got the giggles.
“Sorry,” I said as he slid inside me.
“Pain forgotten,” he said the moment he was inside me.
I made sure not to touch his ribs, and I was extra careful of his leg. It wasn’t always easy, especially when I found myself getting carried away. But I sat up and put his hands on my breasts so that I wasn’t anywhere near his ribs.
Soon, I forgot about the hard floor, and he forgot about his injuries. I was moving against him, and the two of us were gazing at each other with so much love and lust, it was impossible to hide. We didn’t want to look away. I was to too scared that I discover that it was only a dream. So I locked eyes with him and enjoyed every raw emotion that crossed his face.
I should’ve known, from the first time that I saw him, that we were meant to be together in this way. Nothing felt more right than this, and there was no way I was ever going to run away from it again. Henry and I simply fit together, and it was as pure and simple as that.
Despite his injuries, the sex was probably the most passionate we’d had so far. There was no guilt anymore between us, and we weren’t coming together out of grief. This was the first time that we were making love as boyfriend and girlfriend, and there was something very different and wonderful about that. This time, I wanted him to look at me just as much as I wanted to look at him. He came first, and the very feel of it set me off, too. When it was over, I didn’t want to get off him, so I sat there, just smiling down at him.
“Welcome to my new apartment,” I said.
He laughed. “I like what you’ve done to the place.”
“So, this is why it didn’t ever feel like home. I was obviously waiting to do this with you.”
“Does it feel like home now?”