Samuel Blink and the Forbidden Forest

by Matt Haig

  The huldre held on to his own neck, struggling for air as more black vapors swirled around him.

  Professor Tanglewood stopped laughing and tried to look serious. “Don’t think this is any easier for me, huldre, than it is for that witch. Today I can taste the full burden of my role. I am not evil. Understand that. I am the Protector of the Forest. If you could read my new book, you would understand. If I hadn’t made changes, the forest would be a safe place for humans. And what do you think would happen then? It would be swamped with tourists. Day-trippers. Or they’d have taken you all away and locked you in a zoo. Or a science laboratory. And before long, they’d chop the forest to the ground.”

  More shadows blew over the huldre.

  “Please…”—choke—“…please…”

  “There have to be sacrifices for the greater good. Yours is an honorable death. You die for the forest. Take pride in that. Take pride…”

  Grentul could see nothing but blackness. As a suffocating pain filled his body, he held on to one last remembrance. Sitting outdoors with his mother as she made one of her sun carvings, watching the wood peel back and drop onto the grass. Her soft gentle face, lost in concentration.

  “Mother,” he said, or tried to, as the last remnants of life were sucked from him.

  The Shadow Witch inhaled the shadows back inside her as she stood watching the dead huldre heaped on the ground. His blank, blinkless eyes. The motionless tail, curled in a kind of question mark.

  Her sad thoughts broke off with another order from her master.

  “Shadow Witch,” he said. “The two humans are still in the forest. If they are still alive, take their shadows. Change them, in accord with my policy. Together, Shadow Witch, you and me, we must protect the forest from the Outer World. Now go! Find them!”

  Professor Tanglewood watched the Shadow Witch fly away, becoming a dot, then disappearing completely into the sky. He closed his eyes, and smiled sadly, as he thought of how different it had been, in the beginning, when he first met the Shadow Witch.

  How Professor Tanglewood Met the Shadow Witch

  By the time he arrived in Norway, it can be safely said that Professor Horatio Tanglewood was already thoroughly evil. He enjoyed being nasty in the way other people enjoy a game of tennis or a nice peanut-butter sandwich.

  However, he still had a very tiny piece of goodness left inside him, which was evident on his first day in the country when he was cycling back from Flåm. When he reached his driveway a very important event happened, although Professor Tanglewood didn’t realize its importance at the time.

  He saw a cat dangling from the roof. It was a black cat, clinging desperately on to the gutter. Another cat—a white cat—was meowing up from the grass as if to say, “Hold on! Hold on! A man with a bicycle is coming to save you!”

  A memory came to him, from the foggy reaches of his mind. He remembered seeing the two cats before, a long time ago, when he had holidayed here with his mother.

  “Such beautiful darlings, aren’t they, Horatio?” his mother had said as she had tickled the white cat’s neck.

  “Yes, Mummy,” he had told her. “Yes, Mummy; yes, they are.”

  He mouthed the words again as he halted his bicycle. Suddenly he felt like he was someone else—not Professor Tanglewood the evil murderer, but seven-year-old Horatio, the boy who still loved the world and the creatures it contained.

  Within no time at all, he was off his bicycle and galloping inside the house. He climbed the stairs three at a time and opened his bedroom window.

  “Here, kitty; here, kitty; it’s all right,” he said as he stretched his arms as far as they would reach and grabbed hold of the cat’s neck.

  Horatio looked at the collar. He saw the protective Hek bracelet that had given the Shadow Witch enough strength to hold on to the roof for over an hour.

  “Hek,” he read aloud. “Who would name a cat after a witch? Unless, of course…you are a witch.”

  The black cat ran downstairs and out the open door, where it joined the white cat in running toward the trees.

  The mystery wasn’t solved until Professor Tanglewood explored the forest the following day and found the pixies and other creatures he and his mother had once seen all those years ago.

  He suddenly realized that he no longer needed the Outer World.

  How does that world compare to this? he wondered.

  He suddenly realized he could start a new life in this wonderful forest.

  He met friendly huldres, learned the art of spickle dancing, ate gorgeous Truth Pixie soup, and enjoyed comfy naps lying on the belly of a large furry creature called a Slemp. But what Professor Tanglewood enjoyed most was that there were no humans whatsoever. All he had was a world of wonderful food, beautiful music, and peaceful sleep. He enjoyed the most perfect air, the clearest drinking water and the kind of scenery that only belongs in happy dreams.

  In short, the Professor had discovered paradise, and his happiness was about to intensify. One night, while he sat talking about sun worship with an old huldre, he came across two beautiful women.

  They were almost identical, except one was dark and one was fair.

  “Hello,” he said. “I’m Professor Horatio Tanglewood. You may have heard of me. I’m quite important.”

  “Hello,” said the fair woman, who breathed a cloud of frosty breath. “I’m the Snow Witch. This is my sister, the Shadow Witch.”

  “Hello,” said the other, whose words rose out of shadows. “You saved my life.”

  The Professor was entranced. “Did I?”

  “I was the cat who nearly fell to her death.”

  “Oh,” said the Professor. “Oh yes. Of course. I remember.”

  The Shadow Witch nodded. She lifted up her wrist to reveal a black bracelet, with a pewter disc hanging from it. He noticed a similar one, but white, on the wrist of the Snow Witch.

  “You saved my sister’s life,” said the Snow Witch, her pale face melting into a smile. “You are a kind and wonderful man. Not like some humans we hear about. The ones who chop down forests and attack nature. That is why we were there, you see. That is why my sister was on the roof. We keep a lookout, to make sure the forest stays safe.”

  Professor Tanglewood was, by this point, most intrigued. He turned to the Shadow Witch, who was, if anything, the more beautiful of the two. “So,” he said. “I am a hero. I saved your life. What exactly does that mean?”

  “There is a code of honor for forest witches that we have always followed,” said the Shadow Witch. “The Hek Code. One part of that code says that if someone saves a witch’s life, they can ask the witch to cast spells on their behalf.”

  Professor Tanglewood nodded, as if this was the most normal thing he had ever heard in his life.

  “So, what spells can you cast?” he asked the Shadow Witch, raising his eyebrow in a way that he was convinced made him look exceptionally handsome.

  “Any spell at all. So long as it affects the forest. I cannot work magic in the Outer World, but anything inside the forest, I can change.”

  “You saved the right witch,” said the Snow Witch. “Her powers are much stronger than mine. I can conjure the snow and make a frost, and do a few other weather spells, but a Shadow Witch is really the best kind of witch. She can change anything that casts a shadow.”

  “Most interesting,” said the Professor. “Most interesting indeed.”

  The Professor’s first wish was for a home. A wooden palace, perched in the branches of the largest tree in the forest.

  His second wish was for a pen and paper, which the Shadow Witch conjured out of an old caloosh feather and a pine tree.

  “Now that I am your master,” he said, “we really need to make sure those stupid villagers stay out of the forest for good.”

  “But, master,” said the Shadow Witch, “my powers are only strong inside the forest.”

  The Professor nodded. “I know. I wasn’t talking about you. I was talking about me.”

>   The Professor had decided to cast a spell of his own. He would write about the place where he lived, which he now named Shadow Forest in honor of the beautiful witch he had just met.

  In that book, he managed to transform all that was wonderful about the forest into something that was terrifying. The Truth Pixie’s soup became poison. The comfortable, pillow-bellied Slemp became an eater of dreams. And the sun-loving huldre-folk became underground creatures who worked for an evil being called the Changemaker, whom the Professor had made up. Of course, to make it realistic, the Professor gave each creature a weakness. After all, how would he have been able to leave the forest and publish the book if there wasn’t any chance of escape? The huldres, for instance, exploded in daylight. The Truth Pixie couldn’t tell lies. And so on.

  Then, once it was written, he headed back to the Outer World to publish his book, sell his house (to a newly married couple—a javelin thrower and a ski-jumper) and wait for the reviews to arrive. They were all bad, of course, but this time Professor Tanglewood wasn’t bothered. All that mattered was that the superstitious villagers of Flåm believed every word. They did, as the book only served to confirm their own nightmares. The local bookshop ordered a thousand copies and sold out in a week.

  That the Professor then returned to the forest and never came back would have only added more power to his book, and fear into those who read it. Then, a few months after, he decided to make the creatures even more convincing.

  He asked for the Shadow Witch to turn him into a troll so he could go and steal goats in the Outer World.

  “If the goats on the field were stolen by a troll, then they would know for sure my book was real and never dare to enter the forest,” he told the Shadow Witch.

  “Yes, master, but—”

  And then, as the Professor was looking at the Shadow Witch, he noticed something. “You look rather ugly today, Shadow Witch,” he said. “Are you getting wrinkles?”

  The Shadow Witch looked sad. “Yes, master; yes, I am. Every time I use my magic, I get older. That is how witches age. It takes so much out of us, you see.”

  “Oh well, Shadow Witch. You’re going to get even older and uglier, aren’t you? Now, turn me into a troll. No buts. That is my command, Shadow Witch.”

  And so it was. The Professor was turned into a troll and he went and stole a goat. And the next night he stole another. And so it went on.

  Every goat he stole he roasted over a fire and ate all by himself, until he made himself sick.

  But his plan backfired…In fact, the goat stealing became the very reason why someone decided to enter the forest.

  That’s right, it was Uncle Henrik.

  He left Aunt Eda and followed the three-toed footprints all the way back to the clearing. He knocked on the door of the Still Tree, expecting a troll to answer, but of course he got a human instead. And then he asked the Professor to give him his goats back.

  The Professor viewed Uncle Henrik with interest. He was very stubborn, even by human standards. Rather like a foolish dog.

  And then the Professor had another idea. He commanded the Shadow Witch to make sure the man could never talk about the forest to anyone in the Outer World.

  “But, Professor…” said Uncle Henrik. “I won’t tell anyone about the forest. I don’t care about it.”

  “Don’t care! Don’t care! It is paradise.”

  “I already have my paradise. On the other side of the forest. I have my wife.”

  The Professor was not a stupid man. He knew that a tiny goat farm was not paradise, and was determined not to let this human have the chance to tell others about the wonders of the forest.

  “Shadow Witch. Do as I command.”

  It was done.

  And Uncle Henrik could never speak of the forest again.

  The Saddest Sight the Shadow Witch Had Ever Seen

  The Shadow Witch flew over the forest as a raven, scanning the ground for signs of the two human children. She flew over the Truth Pixie’s small cabin and remembered the happy time she and her sister had once spent there, enjoying his wonderful soup. She remembered too the less happy second visit, when she had returned with her master and stolen the creature’s shadow.

  Of course, she had never wanted to turn the Professor’s book, The Creatures of Shadow Forest, into reality. In fact, she had argued with him:

  “But, master, it will destroy everything you love. Everything you want to protect. And it will bring great danger. You will be placing your life at risk.”

  “Not if you make me the most terrifying creature of all,” said the Professor. “Make them scared of me. The one who changed their lives. Let them know me as…the Changemaker. Infect that name with terror. Do you understand?”

  “Yes, master.”

  “Then do as I command. Steal shadows and then make the changes I ask for. All of them.”

  Of course, there were a few problems. Certain creatures couldn’t be changed.

  The Tomtegubbs, for instance, cast no shadow. And the trolls’ shadows were too heavy to be stolen. So these Unchanged creatures became enemies of the Changemaker. That is, of Professor Tanglewood, although the Professor never let the creatures know his real name.

  If the Unchanged were ever caught outside their own regions or trying to escape, the huldres placed them in prison. Then they might be sent to the Professor, who would command the Shadow Witch to kill them.

  Another problem had been the Snow Witch, who made a blizzard that lasted for days, making it more difficult to change all the creatures. The Professor ordered the Shadow Witch to steal her sister’s protective Hek bracelet, then rob her of her powers. After this was done, the Snow Witch was sent to huldre prison, never to return.

  Now, years later, as the Shadow Witch flew over the forest, she remembered the appalling deeds she had done in order to fulfill her master’s command. Such terrible things.

  She scanned the ground but there was no sign of the humans.

  Maybe they had escaped. The thought consoled her, but she knew it was unrealistic. The chances of two human children escaping the forest alive were close to none.

  She swooped lower, and followed the main road from above. Gliding down through the air, she could see the tracks of the wagon that had carried the human girl. And the Snow Witch.

  When she reached the empty cage, her raven feet landed on one of the top bars. She saw the huldres’ skeletons, lying outside on the ground. Inside, she could see no sign of the human girl. There was nothing but some drops of troll blood and the last remnants of snow.

  The snow was only on one side of the cage, and in the form of a mound. Body-shaped. Instantly, the Shadow Witch knew she was looking at her dead sister.

  She flew down inside, and landed in a shallow puddle of icy water.

  Sister. I am sorry. I never meant to weaken you. Forgive me.

  The melting crystals of snow struck her as the saddest sight she had ever seen.

  She flew away, her heart heavy with the order she knew she had to follow. Her eyes searched between the trees, and across the open plain, but there was no sign of the humans. Then, after half a day of looking, she saw something.

  At first it was just two dark, slow-moving specks heading south through a wide path in the woods.

  When she got closer, the specks became a human girl and a Tomtegubb riding on white horses. She landed in front of them and shocked them into a stop as she turned back into a witch.

  The Changes

  “Get off!” the Tomtegubb shouted to Martha. “Get off the horse and find some shade! Hide your shadow!”

  The Shadow Witch tried to shut the Tomtegubb up with a silence spell, but she had absolutely no power over him. Tomtegubbs, despite their very solid bodies, have no shadow whatsoever, not even in the broadest daylight. In fact, they have a kind of reverse shadow, leaving the ground beneath their feet even lighter than it would be otherwise. They had never been able to be controlled by the Shadow Witch, as they never had a shadow to st
eal.

  “Get off!” he told Martha again.

  But it was too late. Martha had dismounted from the horse, but before she could find shade, the Shadow Witch had almost finished her spell.

  Martha stared at the ground and watched as her shadow detached itself from her feet and rose up from the ground in a dark vapor, before it was sucked inside the Shadow Witch’s mouth.

  “I am sorry, human child,” said the Shadow Witch.

  The Shadow Witch turned herself back into a raven and flew away. The Tomtegubb turned to Martha and, for once, looked less than happy. “Oh no,” he told her. “You’re going to change.”

  And he was right.

  Martha felt her dress tighten and sink into her as though it was a second skin. She felt itchy all over, and watched as blue feathers—the same color as her dress—sprouted out of her arms. This was such a strange sight that she hardly realized she was shrinking at the same time.

  For once, the Tomtegubb was speechless. But in his head he couldn’t help working on the final verse of “The Triumphant Tomtegubb and the Heroic Human.’

  “And then something happened that was quite absurd—

  The human sprouted wings and became a bird.”

  Martha spread her wings and flew up into the air, finding it as easy as walking. It was as if she had known how to fly all her life, but no one had ever given her the wings she needed to find out.

  “The songless bird flew high in the air,

  While the Tomtegubb just stopped to stare.”

  Martha flew over the forest and, finding the Shadow Witch, decided to follow her. In the hope she might be changed back to being a human.

  The Shadow Witch caught sight of a familiar dog’s tail sticking out from beneath a tree and swooped down to get a closer look. Martha followed, not realizing she was heading straight to the tree her brother was sleeping under. She landed on one of the branches, while the raven landed away from the shade, and turned back to the Shadow Witch’s true form.