Her

by Heywood, Carey

  I just think about undressing her. If I don’t stop thinking about it, I’ll be pitching a tent for the drive home. She holds the door for me as we walk out. It’s stuff like that. Shouldn’t I be trying to hold the door for her? I just need to focus on a girl who seems to like me. I think back to Jessica kissing my cheek.

  When we get to my car, I can’t let the Justin thing go, it’s like a scab I have to pick. “So, Justin who?”

  It’s a warm day for November, and her arm is already raised halfway to push the button to open the sunroof. “Huh?”

  I suck in the corner of my lip and chew on it. “What Justin are you calling for the English stuff?”

  She folds her arms over her chest. “Justin Lange. Why?”

  I exhale, picturing him. He was a good four inches shorter than her and still had braces. I was worried it was Justin Thorpe, who I played lacrosse with and was a wannabe player. “No reason.”

  She purses her lips and taps the side of her chin. “I could call Justin Thorpe. He gave me his number last week.”

  I brake a little too hard at the stop sign, and we both jerk in our seats. “What?”

  Her eyes are wide when she looks at me. “You’re acting weird. Why are you making such a big deal about this?”

  I look out the rear view mirror to avoid her eyes. “You didn’t tell me some guy gave you his number.” I pause and scratch the back of my head. “Why’d he give you his number?”

  She rolls her eyes. “Not for what you’re thinking. We’re in a group together for Government. I also got Natalie Bruster and Connor Hanson’s numbers. I have both Justins in my English class, so it doesn’t really matter who I call.”

  I can’t help myself. I hate the idea of her talking to Justin Thorpe. “I think you should call Justin Lange.”

  I glance over at Jessica. Why am I even with her? I wonder if she feels the same way. Whatever excitement I had for her left me about two months into our relationship. I think she’s holding on because we fit the expectation everyone has for us.

  God, even my mom likes her, which is strange. Maybe it’s not Jessica, but her parents my mom really likes. Mr. Burton is some executive for a credit union in town. I didn’t know she was shallow like that.

  We haven’t even had sex in a month. She keeps trying, but it just doesn’t feel right. I think she fakes even liking me. I think I’m just filling the spot left by her ex. I wish she would break up with me, but then what? I go back to pining after Sarah. I’m pathetic.

  “I’m going to take off,” I say, standing.

  “Are you going home?”

  I know what she’s really asking. Are you going over to Sarah’s?

  I shake my head. I’m not surprised she looks annoyed, but I’d rather hang out with Sarah than watch stupid shit with her while neither of us talk. She doesn’t even follow me out the door and walk me to my car.

  When I get there, Sarah isn’t even home. I should have called her. Mrs. M tells me to stay and hang out with her. I’m wearing an apron, helping her make dinner, when Brian and Sarah walk in. They just about collapse on each other, laughing at me in my Kiss the Cook apron. Mrs. M clucks at them as I pull it off and hang it back in the pantry.

  “Thanks for helping me, Will.” Mrs. Miller pats my shoulder, giving Sarah and Brian a look.

  “Where were you guys?” I ask as we all walk into the den.

  Sarah falls back onto the sofa and holds up her legs. “See my new kicks.”

  She wants me to look at her new sneakers, but it’s her legs that have my full attention. I look away when Brian’s eyes narrow.

  “Cool,” I say, sitting down.

  Brian faces me. “So how’s your girlfriend?”

  I can’t help but notice Sarah roll her eyes as she picks up the remote. “Fine,”

  I’ve just talked Sarah into going to the movies with Jessica and me. “I’m thinking about breaking up with her.” She doesn’t say anything. “So do you think I should?”

  She looks away. Crap. I want to see her eyes. She tells me she shouldn’t be giving anyone dating advice.

  “I think I like someone else.” What I can’t say is, it’s her.

  Her eyes snap to mine. “Who?”

  I’m too chickenshit to tell her.

  “Who is she?” she asks again.

  I know it drives her crazy when she doesn’t know. I shake my head. “I don’t want to say. I don’t think she likes me like that.”

  She doesn’t say anything for the longest time. “Then she doesn’t deserve you.”

  That’s gotta be a good sign. I feel like pushing her up against the locker and kissing her, but I panic and put her in a headlock instead and start walking toward the door. She bats at my arm and cusses me out. It’s awesome.

  She’s so cute when she’s pissed off. I’m almost to the door when she gets real quiet. I look down at her just in time to watch her tongue flick out and slide up the inside of my upper arm. Stunned, I relax my arm right away and just stare at her dumbfounded. I’m unable to get the feel of her warm, wet tongue out of my head. She stretches her neck and sticks it back out at me.

  “I can’t believe you just licked my arm,” I stammer.

  When she tells me I deserved it, I let her know I’m so going to get her and chase her out the side door to the parking lot. She’s screaming, but she’s still fast and makes it to my car before I can catch her. We both drop our bags and stare at each other across my car, panting. Fuck, this is turning me on.

  I’m not going to catch her if she sees me coming. I crouch down and slowly make my way around the car. She’s hip to what I’m doing a second too late. I grab her, tossing her over my shoulder and run over to the field just past the parking lot. I flop her onto the grass, cringing, thinking that maybe I could have been more gentle. I sit on her, my legs on either side of her.

  God, she’s beautiful. All laid out, underneath me. Her brown hair is fanned out behind her, and her chest is rising and falling. It’s her eyes that kill me. They’re wild. She tries to buck me off, and I laugh when she confesses she has to pee and begs me not to tickle her. Shit, I don’t want to make her piss herself. While that would be funny, she’d have to sit in my car afterward. I chew on my lip while I think about what to do to her.

  Then I have it. “Deal.”

  She gasps when I lower my face to hers. We’re almost nose to nose. “Doesn’t mean that I won’t still have my revenge.” I breathe, trying not to dwell on how good she feels under me.

  Her mouth is open. Her lips are right there. If I just lower my face one more inch, I can kiss her. It takes everything I have not to, especially when I see her eyes start to flutter shut. But, I’m already moving. Shit. Did she want me to kiss her? I lick the side of her face, from her chin to her temple then pull back to see her reaction.

  Holy shit, it’s priceless. I fall off of her and laugh, the almost kiss forgotten. She pushes at me and jumps up, marching over to my car. She’s pissed, which sucks, but the look on her face almost makes it worth it. I’m trying not to laugh, I am. It’s just that every time I look at her, I start all over again.

  I pull her into a hug. She promptly stomps on my foot. I hold on to her even though that hurt like hell and kiss the top of her head before I let go. We’re in my car and already halfway to her house; she’s still pissed.

  “Wanna press the button?” I grin, knowing it’s her weakness.

  She snorts.

  “Well if you don’t want to, I will.” I say, lifting my hand.

  I know she’s forgiven me when she knocks my hand out of the way, saying “No, I’ll press it.”

  When we get to her house, she races to the bathroom. I feel like being a tool so I wait for her just outside the door. She rolls her eyes at me, and I grin. God, I love her.

  Shit, I love her.

  I follow her into the kitchen and hang out while she makes popcorn. We go into the den to watch TV. My phone starts to ring. I almost ignore it when I see it’s Jessica, b
ut she’ll just call back until I answer.

  “Hey.”

  Sarah mouths ‘who is it’ and I mouth back ‘Jessica’ while Jessica is going on about this movie we’re supposed to go see. She asks me if Sarah’s still going with us. I tell her yes, and she replies that she has someone she wants to set her up with. “Hell no” is all I can think.

  I glance over at Sarah. I don’t want some guy dating her. “You didn’t have to do that.” Jessica argues in my ear while Sarah just sits there, looking confused. When Jessica tells me who, I say, “But I don’t even think she likes him.”

  Jessica wants to know why I would say that and to ask Sarah. I look over at her. She’s messing with her phone. She looks up at me as I hold the phone to my chest. “Jessica invited Kyle to come to the movies as your—” I hesitate. “Um, date.” I spit the last word, hating the way it tastes.

  Her eyes widen. I keep going. “I can just tell her you don’t like him, and he doesn’t have to come.”

  Her brows come together. “Kyle Nelson?”

  I nod, hoping she’ll say no.

  “I’m okay going with Kyle,” she says.

  What the fuck?

  After I hang up with Jessica, I stare at her, wondering if she might actually like him, knowing it would kill me if she did.

  Finally, it gets to her. “What?”

  “I didn’t know you liked Kyle,” I admit, even though it’s killing me.

  She shrugs. “He’s okay, I guess. I’ve never really hung out with him. Besides, I hate being the third wheel to you and whatever girl you end up dating. Maybe it’d be nice to have someone too.”

  “You never feel like a third wheel to me.” Honestly, I’d rather it was just us, but I can’t tell her that.

  She rolls her eyes and flips onto her slide, stretching her feet out and onto my lap. I rest my hands on her calves. I have to fight the urge to rub them; her legs are soft and smooth and in my lap. I glance over at her. The way her shorts shifted when she turned, I can see right up them. Holy shit, I can see one rounded, beautiful (damnit, I’m getting hard) ass cheek.

  My mouth waters, and I blurt. “Are you wearing underwear?”

  Her face snaps to mine. “Excuse me?”

  I can’t shut up. Why did I say anything? “I can totally see your butt cheek.”

  She presses the back of her shorts down, and I lose my view. “Yes, I’m wearing underwear.”

  I look at her hand, still pressing her shorts to her skin and shake my head, picturing her ass. “It didn’t look like it.”

  She notices the direction of my eyes. “Stop looking at my butt.”

  “Who’s looking at your butt?”

  Oh shit. We both look up as Brian walks in. Shit. Shit. Shit.

  “Will is.” Sarah says, throwing me under the bus.

  He is absolutely going to kick my ass. Shit. I can’t even try to defend the fact that I have a raging hard on. Fuck. I don’t want to look like a bitch and cringe. His eyes are on mine as he walks across the room. He doesn’t stop when he passes me on his way to the recliner on the other side of the sofa, but he does cuff the top of my head. Hard. He stops before sitting and points at me, then Sarah, then back at him. I nod, message received loud and fucking clear I think, while I rub my head. Shit, that hurt like hell.

  Sarah pulls a blanket off the back of the couch and covers her ass with it. Brian doesn’t stay long, not liking what we’re watching. As soon as he leaves, we look at each other and crack up.

  “Holy shit, I thought he was going to kick my ass there for a second,” I admit once I’m done laughing.

  She’s still laughing. “How’s your head?”

  Not smart to tease the guy who has your feet in his lap, “You think that’s funny?”

  I reach past her and move the popcorn to the coffee table and then grab her ankles in one hard grip as I tickle her feet. She bucks like a wild stallion, trying to kick out of my grasp. She’s cursing, screaming, and falling all over the place, and she is one hundred percent at my mercy. Suddenly, she changes her tactics and manages to work her way into my lap. Shit, thank God my dick isn’t hard anymore, but hell, if she keeps twisting around in my lap…

  I’m only really ticklish under my arms. She jams her fingers into my armpits, and I lock my arms tight to my sides. Her hands might be there, but there’s no way she can move them.

  She tilts her head at me. “Relax, Will.”

  I shake my head. “Nope, you’re untrustworthy.”

  She wiggles in my lap some more, and I’m fucked. I need to get her off of me before she notices the stiffy I’m getting. I stand, hauling her up with me and drop her back on her side of the couch. When I sit, I pull the blanket across me to help camouflage my wood. She gives me a weird look, and I look away.

  “Are you cold?” she asks.

  I don’t say anything and watch as she stretches back out across the sofa, trying to make sure I can’t see up her shorts again. I hold back a grin when I spy a flash of cheek again.

  She must have seen it, though. “What?” She asks. “You took away my blanket.”

  I wad up the blanket and throw it at her face and adjust so she won’t notice.

  “You suck.”

  I grin.

  When I get back to my house, I have a raging case of blue balls. That girl got me hard at least three times today. It’s late. My mom’s already in bed, and my dad’s out of town on business. I hop into the shower. My hands go straight for my cock. I lean back against the side wall and stroke myself. I picture her, earlier that day, laid out underneath me in the grass. I imagine what it would feel like to touch her, and I think about that hint of ass I saw before.

  It doesn’t take me long to get close. I have this picture in my head, this dream. It does it for me every time. I see myself lying on my back, on a bed, and her naked, crawling toward me. My whole body tenses as I cum. Afterward, I feel the tension drain from me. I get out of the shower and towel off before collapsing into bed.

  I’m almost asleep when a thought wakes me up. She has a fucking date with Kyle Nelson.

  I pull up in front of Sarah’s house. I’m getting out to go ring her bell when she comes running out and then turns around and runs back in. I laugh and sit back down. She is always forgetting shit. I’m used to it by now. She comes out again, and I get a good look at her. Damn, she looks amazing. She’s wearing a dress. She almost never wears dresses. Christ, and this one’s short too. I watch her legs as she walks over to my car.

  She hesitates before sliding in. “Won’t Jessica be pissed that you picked me up first?”

  Screw her, I think as I shrug. After a couple of minutes, I ask her if her dress is new.

  When she shakes her head, I mumble, “I’ve never seen you wear it.”

  She laughs. “Because I wear dresses all the time.”

  It takes everything I have not to reach out and touch her. I take a deep breath. “You look nice.”

  She smirks at me. “For a tomboy, right?”

  I’m at a red light. I take my time looking at her, letting her know I’m looking at her. “You don’t look like a tom boy tonight, Miller Lite.”

  We drive in silence the rest of the way to Jessica’s house. She fiddles with the hem of her dress while I try and keep my eyes on the road and not her thighs. She gets out and hops in back when I get to Jessica’s house. I don’t even bother going to the door, I just stay in her driveway and honk. Once she’s in the car, she says something to Sarah, but I’m already tuning her out.

  I keep sneaking glances at Sarah in the rearview. One time, she sticks her tongue out at me, and I have to bite back a smile. I tense up when we get to Kyle’s house. It’s really pissing me off that he’s Sarah’s date and not me.

  When he gets in, he tells her she looks pretty. Why didn’t I tell her she looked pretty? She smiles shyly at him. Fuck. It’ll kill me if she actually likes him. I’m ready to deck him when we get to the Multiplex. In line for the tickets, he stands way too
close to her.

  I glance back at him. Did he just fucking smell her? I buy her ticket even though I know it’ll piss him off. He looks annoyed but tries to play it off, asking Sarah about her ring.

  She looks at me. “I love it, wear it every day.”

  Hell yeah. I can’t help it, I grin. I’m too busy feeling all pumped up over Sarah loving the ring I got her that I miss Kyle getting her candy and an Icee. I really am starting to hate him. I get an extra large popcorn to share with her. Jessica doesn’t like popcorn, and Kyle can play in traffic if he thinks he’s getting any. Plus, if we’re sharing popcorn, she’ll have to sit next to me. So we end up sitting Kyle, then Sarah, me, then Jessica. The armrests can move, so I push the one between us up and put the popcorn there.

  During the movie our hands bump a few times when we reach for popcorn at the same time. Each time, she looks at me and smiles, and I know I don’t care when or how, but someday, someway, Sarah Miller and I are going to be together.

  When we finish the popcorn, I tuck the container under my seat and rest my hand between us. I’m crazy, but I have to touch her. I inch my hand over as close as I can get it without being obvious and just barely touch her thigh with my pinkie finger. She has to notice it. I stare at her out of the corner of my eye and rejoice when she doesn’t move away from me. Then I notice that fuckwad put his arm around her. I turn and glare at his hand on her shoulder.

  She looks at me, sees my expression and moves her leg away from my hand. Well that fucking sucks. I move my hand and rest it on my leg. All I can think about for the rest of the movie is his fucking arm around her. That should be me.

  The girls go to the bathroom after the movie. Kyle tries to talk to me in the hallway, but I fake reading upcoming release posters so he’ll leave me alone. Sucks, I used to like Kyle before he tried to date Sarah. On the way back to the car, I suggest ice cream. There’s this place Sarah and I always go to. I’ve never brought Jessica there.

  Jessica and Kyle check out the menu while I order for Sarah and me. She knocks her hip into mine when I pay. I grin. I hope it pisses Nelson off. We talk with Jim, the clerk, while we wait for them. He asks about college, surprised that we’re going to different schools.