Radiant Desire (A Handmaids Seduction, #1)

by Inara Scott

“You cannot escape us,” the voices hissed in unison. “We watch you no matter where you go.”

  Damp, cold air rolled off them in waves, sending goose bumps dancing across Kaia’s exposed skin. She steadied herself and called out confidently, “I am doing as Zafira commanded. I have more than three weeks left. You have no reason to be here.”

  As her vision adjusted to the light, the dim outline of faces shrouded by the black hoods came into view. She had never been this close before, and could now see the skeletal outlines of pointed chins and prominent cheekbones, colorless flesh, and gleaming lights where eyes should have been. Their hands were exposed as well, bony fingers with pale skin stretched taut.

  “We watch. We wait,” the Black Ladies sang, violence inherent in the clashing tones of their three intertwined voices. “We will return for you, Kaia Verde. Do not try to escape us.”

  Their outlines faded slowly. When they were gone Kaia threw the blanket over her head and curled into a ball. She imagined pulling her wings around her like a cape and stroking the delicate, feathery tips. And she cried for all that she feared would never be hers again.

  §

  Sunday dinner at the Manor, Kaia discovered, was surprisingly formal—perhaps because it was the first night that Garrett would be joining them. Someone had actually gone through her belongings, decided she lacked sufficiently respectable clothing, and produced a dress for her to wear for the occasion. The fabric was a lovely teal-green chiffon that cascaded in tiers from her waist to her knees and floated around her upper arms in two loose waves. It was the nicest garment she’d held since she re-entered the human world, and for a moment she sat on her bed in the sanatorium and stroked the soft fabric in mute appreciation. She’d worn fancier dresses, to be sure, but it was a far cry from the ill-fitting T-shirts and worn jeans she’d scrounged from bins at Good Sam.

  She took special care with her appearance, styling her hair with the curling iron that had been left for her in the bathroom and applying a light coat of mascara as she’d been practicing ever since Rachel had invited her over for dinner.

  She wasn’t sure what to do about the angry words she’d exchanged with Garrett. Clearly, she’d have to find some way to get him over his distrust, and yelling at him wasn’t going to do it. Wearing a beautiful new dress and looking her best certainly couldn’t hurt.

  Once she was dressed, she stared at herself in the mirror for a few minutes and tried to think about seduction. She tried to remember what it felt like to be a faerie, when she’d been so sure of her power to overwhelm a man with lust.

  It didn’t feel the same.

  She sighed and pushed her hair back behind her ears. She’d simply have to find a new path.

  Portia and Lexi were already standing beside the massive oak dining table when she arrived. Portia nodded stiffly. She wore a fitted ivory dress and matching jacket, her hair caught in its usual sleek chignon without a strand out of place.

  Lexi brightened when she saw Kaia. “I got a peppermint sundae, Kaia. Do you like peppermint ice cream? You should come with us next time. Uncle Garrett said he didn’t think you liked ice cream. Is that true?”

  “Oh, no, I do like ice cream,” Kaia said. “But I don’t think I’ve ever had peppermint ice cream.”

  Lexi looked appalled. “Never had peppermint?”

  “Now that is a crime.” Garrett entered the room with a lazy smile. He wore khaki trousers and a navy jacket. His hair rumpled over his forehead in a loose blond wave. “We’ll have to take you when we go tomorrow.”

  “Garrett, why did you take Lexi out for ice cream? You know you spoil her dinner if you give her a treat after five.” Portia pursed her lips with disapproval.

  “Portia.” Garrett acknowledged her with a nod of his head and sank down at the end of the table. He ignored her comment completely. “Shall we eat?”

  Portia gave a long-suffering sigh and sat down at Garrett’s right. Lexi sat on his other side.

  “Kaia, sit next to me,” Lexi called, patting the table next to her.

  “Lexi,” Portia reproved. “Modulate your voice.”

  Kaia wasn’t sure if she was allowed to do as Lexi requested, but the girl looked so crestfallen at Portia’s rebuke, she didn’t really care. She sat beside the girl and gave her a friendly smile. “I’d love to sit next to you, Lexi. Maybe you can tell me more about peppermint ice cream. Does it taste like those peppermint candies? The red and white swirly ones?”

  “Oh, it’s pink and has little pieces of candy in it,” Lexi explained. “It’s even better than hard candies, though. Mr. Netti doesn’t like ice cream. He says it’s too sweet. I like anything sweet. You can ask my dad.”

  Before she managed to get herself into further trouble with Portia, Kaia gently nudged the girl’s knee and made a point of delicately removing her napkin from the table and placing it over her lap. Lexi’s eyes widened, and she copied Kaia’s moves precisely. She shot a nervous glance at her great-grandmother, who was giving some instructions to a servant, and mouthed “thanks” at Kaia.

  Kaia gave her a wink and reached for her glass of water. When she looked up a moment later, she caught Garrett’s eye and realized he was watching her. Heat stole into her cheeks and she looked away, unsure exactly what she was so embarrassed about except that for some reason, any time Garrett looked at her with that square jaw and those firm lips, she seemed to flush.

  The meal was not unlike many Kaia had eaten at four-star restaurants. Portia’s staff served fine wine, soup and salad, and a main course of filet mignon, twice-baked potato, and asparagus. The food seemed, however, completely inappropriate for a child. Lexi picked at her food and tried not to clink her silverware on her plate, wincing every time she did and shooting horrified looks at Portia.

  For the most part, Portia ignored everyone but Garrett, asking him questions about his business activities, the status of various real estate deals, and charity activities they seemed to work on together. He put her off with clipped, monosyllabic responses.

  Once Lexi had been dismissed from the table, Portia turned her growing irritation on Kaia.

  “So, Miss Verde,” she snapped, sipping from a cup of coffee, “where are you from?”

  Kaia cleared her throat. Portia’s eyes were a particularly intimidating shade of blue when she was irritated. Which, Kaia was rapidly discovering, was most of the time.

  She gave her standard response. “I moved around a lot.”

  “Where, exactly?” Portia demanded. “Your accent is very unusual.”

  Kaia thought about what she had said on the subject already to Garrett and what she could actually defend. She knew England, because she had spent the first decade of her life there before she was recalled to Faeria, and she had visited Mina’s old home in Ireland on a number of occasions. Other than that, she had spent most of her time studying and seducing men in the United States and traveling from Gate to Gate. She’d been alive for more than a hundred human years, but other than her first ten in England, she’d never stayed in one place for more than a month.

  “England,” she said slowly. “Ireland, California, Texas, New York, Arkansas.”

  “Goodness. Why did you move so much?”

  “My dad was in the army.” The story came easily now, and she silently thanked Jenny for giving her the idea.

  Garrett raised his eyebrows. “Really? I hadn’t realized we were sending troops to Ireland these days. Or New York for that matter.”

  Kaia realized too late she had no idea where there might be military bases, or where her imaginary father might have been stationed. Panicked, she sipped from her cup of coffee and forced a casual smile. “Oh, my parents sent me to school in England when my dad was stationed abroad. I traveled from there.”

  “You lived in England?” Portia pressed. “You don’t sound English.”

  “Like I said, I moved around.” Kaia waved a hand in front of her as if she were bored by the topic. “My mom sent me to boarding school when I was you
ng so I would have some stability in my life. For high school I moved back to the States to be with her.”

  “Hmmm.” Portia took a delicate sip of her wine. “I assume you are unmarried?”

  “My husband passed away about six weeks ago.”

  “Really?” Portia drew back. “How long were you married?”

  “Ten years.”

  “No children?”

  Kaia squirmed. “No.”

  “I see.” Portia sniffed her disapproval. “How old are you?”

  Kaia started to sink down in her seat under the weight of the questions. “Twenty-eight.”

  “So you married when you were eighteen.” Portia’s expression made it clear what she thought about that choice. “What about college. You did go to college, I assume?”

  “No.”

  “You worked, then. You must have some job skills.”

  “My husband didn’t want me to work.”

  “So you have no husband, no children, no job skills, and no education. I suppose it’s a good thing we have Good Samaritan. For people like you.” Portia’s disapproval was so strong, so virulent, Kaia actually considered leaving the table.

  Even as shame rose up in her throat, she caught a glimpse of curly hair and the tip of a horn under the sideboard on the far side of the room. Slowly, the imp rose into view, and she realized he was rolling, actually rolling with laughter.

  And that did it. She was not some lowly human to be humiliated in front of the imp by a mean old woman who had to fill her days with tormenting her great-granddaughter, pestering her grandson, and interrogating a woman she barely knew about her life’s choices. Kaia was—or someday she would once again be—a Handmaid to the queen. She did not have to grovel at the feet of Portia Jameson.

  She raised her chin and let her remembered dignity flow through her. Faeries were not slave to any man, and she was not subject to Portia’s judgment.

  “Excuse me,” she said. “I had thought I was a guest in this house. It was my pleasure to do my part and help look after Lexi, but I am not your servant or your child. I am an adult and I expect to be treated with respect. If I am instead to be a creature of scorn, I would be more than happy to leave.”

  She set her napkin down on the table and pushed back her chair. Imagining herself walking down the aisle toward Zafira’s throne, she assumed the same regal posture. “Thank you for the place to stay, but I would much rather return to Good Sam than stay here. At least there, I am treated with respect.”

  For a moment, there was silence. Kaia turned and walked a few paces to the door. She would have to find some other way to keep Garrett’s attention, she told herself. Even with the Black Ladies breathing down her neck, staying here at the Manor and debasing herself in front of Portia was simply not an option.

  Garrett whistled softly. “Portia, I believe you have been put in your place.”

  “Oh for heaven’s sake, girl,” Portia said. “Don’t be such a goose. I was only asking a few questions.”

  Garrett snorted. “Is that your attempt at an apology?”

  “She’s staying at our house. I thought I ought to know a little more about her,” Portia said.

  “And you were quite successful,” Garrett drawled. “In fact, you’ve gotten more information out of her than I ever managed. However, I must second Kaia’s statement. I brought her here because I assumed she’d be safe. I did not bring her here to be insulted. If anyone is leaving, we both are.”

  He strode from the table and took Kaia’s elbow at the door. Kaia quivered at his touch. Could he actually be… defending her?

  “Now you’re both being ridiculous,” Portia snapped, coming to her feet. “No one is leaving over a few silly questions.”

  Garrett leaned in toward Kaia. “I apologize,” he said. “You shouldn’t have to endure that. We can stay at my place in town.”

  Kaia’s heart leapt at the prospect of being alone with him, and then dropped as she thought about Lexi. “I can’t let you do that,” she said. “Lexi needs you here with her. I couldn’t be responsible for taking you away.”

  He bowed his head slightly and she thought she saw a glimmer of respect in his eyes. “Are you sure?”

  She wasn’t sure. She wasn’t sure at all. What was she supposed to do? How was she supposed to get this man, this difficult, complex man, to fall in love with her?

  Why did being human have to be so damn complicated?

  “Of course she’s sure,” Portia boomed. “Now leave her be. No one is going anywhere tonight.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  They left the dining room a few moments later. Garrett asked Kaia to wait outside while he said something in private to Portia. Kaia didn’t know what he said but suspected, based on the bleak look on his face, that it wasn’t friendly. He walked her back to her room with a grim set to his jaw.

  “She is often difficult,” he said. “But rarely openly rude. I honestly would not have brought you here had I known that would happen. I did not intend to humiliate you, Kaia. I hope you know that.”

  “Are you sure about that?” Kaia asked.

  Garrett sighed. “Actually, no, I’m not. I was angry when you walked out that night, and I honestly don’t know now whether to trust you or not. I’m sorry if that sounds harsh, but it’s the truth.”

  Kaia inclined her head. At least now, they were getting to honesty. “I understand. It’s not easy to trust someone who let you down.”

  Garrett gave a short laugh. “Story of my life.”

  Before she could ask him what that meant, he continued. “Regardless, I haven’t been very nice to you, and I’m sorry. Hearing Portia ask those questions was a bit of an awakening for me. You didn’t deserve to be treated that way. No one does.”

  Garrett pushed open the door to her room and Kaia preceded him inside. He gently closed it behind them. Her eyes flickered instantly to the bed in the corner and back to Garrett.

  “He didn’t… ” Garrett began. “Your husband, I mean. He didn’t, er, hurt you, did he?”

  Kaia sank down on the soft bedspread. “No. By the end I barely saw him. He lost interest in me. Please, can we not talk about him? I want to forget all of it.”

  Garrett sat down beside her and gently brushed her hair back from her face. “Then let’s talk about something different,” he said. “Something other than the past. I know so little about you other than your apparent love of flowers. And I recall thinking you were a bit of an environmental crusader the night we met.”

  It was the first time he had mentioned that night without a hint of malice, and Kaia knew that their relationship was finally starting to heal. The tension between them had loosened, like the petals of a rosebud just beginning to open.

  “I don’t think I’d call myself a crusader. I do wish there was some way to protect the wild lands. I see animals and plants disappearing from the earth and it breaks my heart. Your company is doing something about that, isn’t it?” She thought about the article she had read about him, on the computer back at Good Sam. “You’re doing things with green building techniques, and using renewable energy at your new condo projects, aren’t you?”

  Garrett raised a curious eyebrow. “Been reading about Jameson Enterprises, have you?”

  Kaia flushed. “I found one of the Tanforth Tower brochures in the library. It’s really remarkable, with the landscaping, the solar panels, the high-efficiency cooling system… ”

  “I admit, it’s a passion of mine,” he said. He grabbed a pillow and placed it under his head, relaxing against the wall behind them. “Miami is already one of the greenest cities in America. I just want to see how far we can take it. And it isn’t as if it’s a charity. Green buildings are incredibly popular right now. I sold every unit in that tower six months before we started construction.”

  “Well I’m impressed,” Kaia said. “I’d love to learn more about it someday.”

  “I’ll have to give you a tour.” Garrett took her hand in his, gently tugging he
r toward him. “So, if you like growing things so much do you like to camp? Do a lot of outdoor sports—hiking and whatnot?”

  Kaia shuddered at the memory of her experience in the Everglades, with the dark shadows lurking in the waters, the feeling of the dirt under her fingernails, and the carnivorous mosquitoes. “I like to hike, but I’m not sure I’m much of a camper. I think I prefer my outdoor activities from the safety of a nice hotel.”

  “A day of scuba followed by a warm shower and hot meal,” he said with satisfaction. “Sounds perfect to me.”

  “What about you?” she asked. “Tell me something new. Do you prefer plays or movies?”

  “Definitely plays. Never cared much for the big screen.”

  “What’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?”

  He stopped to think for a moment. “The Christ of the Abyss.”

  “What’s that?”

  “It’s a statue of Jesus, submerged about twenty-five feet underwater off the coast of Key Largo. It’s a tradition for divers to visit it, whether you’re religious or not. I saw it on one of my first solo dives. When I was down there, it was just so incredibly quiet and peaceful. I don’t know how to describe it. Nothing about my life back home seemed important. I could have stayed there forever, just floating.”

  Kaia leaned into his arms. The way he described the statue reminded her of the way she felt when she was lying beside her birth plant, wholly at one with her place in the world and at peace with the life all around her.

  They lay together for several long minutes, just listening to each other breathe.

  “Tomorrow will be different,” he said finally. “I talked to Portia. I hadn’t realized she had turned you into Lexi’s nanny. You don’t have to work while you’re here. You’re our guest.”

  “You don’t have to protect me. I can take care of myself.”

  He laughed, a hint of wonder in his voice. “You know, I wouldn’t have thought it before, but the way you looked tonight—well, it was like being in the presence of royalty. I don’t think even Portia would have the guts to insult you now.”