Intimates: A Journey Towards Sacred Sexuality

by Francis Kroncke

CHAPTER 10

  "Do you think Coupling’s all it’s cracked up to be?"

  "Have they ever not been right?" Inside himself: How could you even ask that question?

  "You mean," he hesitates...this is new ground..."you’re totally satisfied with Cilla?"

  A look of Who is this guy? bordering on stupid? and have I misjudged him?

  Zav notes the far-away look. Gets up and goes to his room.

  "Are you?"

  "What?" Again?

  "Totally satisfied?"

  "It totals up. That good enough for you?"

  "Sure." Surely not!

  Mark was pretty predictable but who else is there? When they had Tagged...not with these two...he had been pretty formulaic. Had his rush of seductive babble. Knew how to flatter...actually, he’s top-grade there! Zav almost didn’t have to utter a word. Mark mesmerized all the girls. He kept them, how was it...what? "Off-balance" the only phrase which came to mind.

  "Your hair is so lustrous—it’s so magical!" He touches just the hem of her hairline. Snags one strand. "Pure amber...the blessing of the Goddess!" Sighs. "Are you the Enchantress dancing round my Pillar?" Festive tease. Zav didn’t know how or why it worked because "If I said that, dead fish!"...but there was something Mark had that moved the girls, this girl to pledge, "May all the Goddess’ blessings be yours!"...and without any hesitation she’d flock her hair and slip through time and space to be kneeling before him or him on the bed and she between his legs—no kidding about it, Zav was amazed...Respectful! Here was a guy who knew how to "please one, get one" like no one else he knew. Hmmm. Not only respectful, but grateful!....because he was the immediate beneficiary of Mark's skills...she never complaining when he mounted her as she picnicked with Mark!

  But it stopped, somewhat abruptly, right about there. Talk—Play—End. Something quite unsatisfying for Zav, so it made sense for him to ask, "Totally satisfying?" He had never encountered Cilla before he met Lil. Certain that he hadn’t. For some reason, that made dealing with Cilla palatable. He was relieved that she didn’t look at him even with a Say, weren’t you in line at...? type of look which most guys didn’t know how to handle, confessing more in boast than fact, Sure, babe, it was me, even if not, because, anyways, no one was suppose to try and remember, though forgetting everyone was even more difficult.

  Zav relished re-playing with memories of several he had never seen but once, so neither he nor Cilla seemed to have even the remotest sense of a connection...it was like how he thought Mark thinks, that Lil’s what Cilla’s not... at least I think so."At least you hope so, guy, admit that to yourself!".. Cow-bung! He liked Mark, it was a curious attraction he recognizes—What does Mark find in me? Not sure that Mark ever asks himself that question!...Okay! Okay...You don’t like...really don’t!... how he does it. That’s what bugs you about Cilla. How can she put up with him? You want to be positive about his seductive skills, but—Toot! Toot!—he’s like all the others, with a fast in and out...just being ridden by his cock, not riding it—I've always hated that!...So, why would she be any different from the ones you Tagged together? Do you want her to be different?

  "When did it begin to get you down?" Why didn’t anyone ask me that?

  Asking myself. Am I alone in this universe? Sure, I question it all. All! Why? Because it happened. Three months into it and I began not to care. To say, He’s got her, so I’ve got her, right? Isn’t that passing the final test? Becoming these other guys? But, suppose I said, "Teacher, how do I know these other guys have become me?"

  cow-bung!cow-bungcowbungbungbung!

  "I feel Bad." Zav says this out loud to himself. Suppose I say that to others? What would it mean? But it’s a good word. "I’m so down I’m Bad." Better keep that to myself.

  Mark: "Let's get straight, Cilla is totally satisfying. Come at it this way. She’s done it all. So she’s told me. Filled in every box. So there’s nothing I can’t do. Isn’t that the total sum and balance? What The Course is all about?"

  "Have you done it all?"

  "What’s not done?"

  Clyde was his name. Told me about the watching. Told me how to watch. Never took me out on point, but was vividly descriptive. Would describe the intricate lay of her pubic hairs! Had five adjectives for the softness of hair...at least for the hair he liked. "Every sense," is how he described it, "Catch this...when you’re doing it, like hot and heavy pounding the sheets, when your cock’s so hard your brain’s splitting...you can’t get in every sense, simply cannot. You need more women. Several a night. Sometimes in a row. You have to remember if you’re just fucking...but the eyes, they suck in, they’re like a girl’s pussy...believe me! girls see you, don’t you get it? ...that’s why they spout that babble about "Whatever you want!" and coo, "I’ll give you everything!"...Crap! Just mounds of elephant feces, Ha! Ha!...They see you, all of you—don’t drop the ball on this insight!—"The ball?!"...Catch this...you see and you remember, you see and you fantasize, you see and you are there...it may be Tom’s dick or Harry’s cock but it’s you like you’ve never been there—each cunny is every cunny, each lickable boob is every boob you’ve ever drooled over and sifted through your suckling fingers... Look! get it? Look and your cock’s not blind anymore! Ha! Ha!"

  "What’s there about Cilla?"

  For the first time, Mark realized that Zav had never had Cilla!

  "What’s not there?" Passing it off with a slight chuckle, an eye-turn towards the Flicker.

  "No, guy, I mean this. C’mon." Almost pleading. Pathetic.

  "She never tells Lil everything."

  Zav waits for another sentence. Doesn’t come.

  Mark can almost see him waiting. Eyes him on the periphery. Two guys sitting kitty-corner watching mega-ball.

  "Great game, eh?!"

  Mark knows something Zav doesn’t. Smug within—"You’re Twenty, sure, but you’ll always be Green!" It was, back-then, at this very exact moment when he fixated on mastering Lil. Imbalance. "War of the Sexes!" It was what he felt, not what he thought...It is what he desires as he leaves the room, having played Zav like the fool he is!