Notorious

by Kiki Swinson

“All my socks are dirty. Go on in Rachael’s room and get a pair of hers,” Carmen said as she pushed back on the door.

  “You know Rachael’s bedroom is locked.”

  “Well, whatcha want me to do? I don’t have a key to get in there.”

  “Don’t be acting all funny ’cause you got Miss Rich Girl in there,” Aunt Sandra yelled through the door while Carmen was closing it.

  “I ain’t trying to act funny. So stop tripping and go on back downstairs with Grandma and see if she’ll give you a pair of her socks.”

  Aunt Sandra hit the door with her fist. “Fuck both of y’all!” she yelled.

  “Yeah, all right, Ma. Go on ’bout cha business.”

  I heard Aunt Sandra walk away from the door and head back downstairs, so I felt like the coast was clear and began to open up to Carmen.

  “What I’m about to tell you, you gotta promise me that you will not tell a soul. You can’t tell anyone. I’m talking about your mama, Grandma Hattie, your boyfriend, or Rachael. This has to stay between me and you.”

  With a sincere expression, Carmen said, “So, what is it?”

  “First you have to promise me that what I’m about to tell you won’t leave this room.”

  Carmen sighed. “I promise, I promise.”

  I looked into Carmen’s eyes and took a deep breath, and before I realized it, I was running everything down to her. You should’ve seen her facial expression when I told her I witnessed the entire murder and that Maceo along with another guy were the killers.

  Her mouth flew wide open. “Oh, my God! You saw the whole thing,” she said.

  I nodded my head.

  “Why didn’t you say something to me that night?” Carmen wondered aloud.

  “I was too distraught to tell anybody. All I wanted to do was get the hell out of here before anybody saw me.”

  “Where exactly were you standing when you saw Lil D get murdered?”

  “I was walking by the alley where he got shot at.”

  Carmen shook her head in disbelief. “Oh, my God, this is crazy,” she said. “If Cynthia knew Maceo was the one who killed her baby daddy, she would go off. She would have her whole family looking for Maceo and that other nigga who was with him.”

  “You aren’t going to tell her, are you?”

  “Hell nah, I ain’t going to tell her. Do you know how serious this shit is? I don’t want to be associated with this in no shape, form, or fashion. I don’t even want my name coming up when people start talking about it.” Carmen stood up from the bed. She paced back and forth around her bedroom like she was trying to come up with a solution.

  “What are you thinking about?” I asked.

  “I’m just trying to figure out why Maceo had to kill Lil D like that. They were tight like brothers.”

  “Remember you mentioned to me over the phone earlier you heard a rumor that Lil D was snitching? Well, that rumor must’ve been correct because right before Maceo and the other guy shot him, they tormented him and called him a snitch.”

  “Oh shit! So what people were saying was true,” she said, stopping in her tracks.

  I sat there and stared at Carmen, wondering where she was going with this. She knew Maceo and Lil D, so she knew the history behind them both. I just sat there in limbo and waited for her to draw her own conclusion—and in the process, advise me on how to handle my part in this matter. I had been through one murder after the other and my head couldn’t keep taking all of this psychological bullshit. So, I interrupted her train of thought and told her I was in the company of Maceo this morning.

  Her eyes and mouth grew at least two inches in size. “Oh, so that’s why you left Mario’s house all of a sudden?” she guessed.

  “You damn right. My skin was crawling the whole time I was around him and I couldn’t take the feeling, so I got out of there as quickly as I could.”

  “Did Maceo say something to you?” she asked.

  “When I initially walked in the living room and saw him sitting there, he asked me where he knew me from. And Mario told him he probably saw me out here in Huntersville because I had family who lived out here.”

  “Did my name come up?”

  “Yeah, when he asked me who I was related to, I told him.”

  “And what did he say?”

  “He didn’t say anything.”

  “Well, what are you going to do about Mario? Because you know nine times out of ten, you are going to see Maceo when you are in Mario’s company. Maceo is his only brother and they are close. I’ve heard that Maceo looks up to Mario because he is the older brother.”

  I shook my head. “I don’t know what I’m going to do. I’ve been trying to figure out away to tell him that I don’t want to see him anymore.”

  “Just tell him that the relationship is going too fast, so you want to take a few steps back.”

  “He is a very aggressive guy. Do you think that’s going to work?”

  “It’s gonna have to.”

  “I don’t know, Carmen,” I said, and then I fell silent because of a cracking noise I heard from the other side of the door. I immediately jumped to my feet and grabbed a hold of the doorknob, and when I snatched it open I looked into the hallway to see who was there.

  “Who is it?” Carmen whispered.

  “I don’t see anyone,” I whispered back.

  “Is Rachael’s door closed?”

  “Yes, and it still has the lock on it, too,” I replied.

  “Wait a minute, I’ma go and check the bathroom,” she said, and then stepped out of the room and proceeded down the hall. I stood there at the entrance of her bedroom door and waited for her to do her investigative work. My heart began to pound hard with each step she took. And when she grabbed hold of the doorknob to the bathroom to turn it and it wouldn’t move, my heart stopped.

  Carmen started banging on the door. “Who’s in there?” she demanded.

  “It’s your mama, girl. Whatcha want? I’m trying to take a shit in peace,” Sandra replied.

  “Do you think she heard our conversation?” I whispered loud enough for Carmen to hear me.

  She shrugged her shoulders as if to say she didn’t know.

  “Ask her,” I continued to whisper.

  “Ma, were you just standing by my door?” Carmen asked her.

  “No, I wasn’t,” she replied defensively.

  Carmen pressed the issue. “You sure you weren’t trying to ear hustle?”

  Aunt Sandra cracked the door open good enough for her to peep out at Carmen. “Girl, get your ass away from this door so I can use the bathroom in peace. I ain’t got time for your bullshit!” she snapped.

  “You sure you’re using the bathroom?” Carmen continued as she tried to peer into the bathroom.

  Aunt Sandra refused to answer her question and slammed the door in her face. Carmen walked away from the door and reentered her bedroom.

  I looked at her nervously. “Do you think she was standing by the door listening to us?” I asked.

  “It’s kind of hard to tell.”

  “What if she did?”

  “Whatcha mean?” Carmen asked as she closed the door to her bedroom.

  “What if she did hear us? Do you think she would say something?”

  “Who would she say something to?” Carmen shook her head. “Nah, she ain’t like that,” Carmen assured me. “She’ll talk shit to all of us around the house, but she wouldn’t dare sell out on us.”

  Carmen’s effort to convince me that her mother wouldn’t run her mouth didn’t fly with me. I knew Sandra didn’t like me and that alone made me wary. As far as I could see it, I didn’t mean shit to her. I was a liability, so if she had any clue that I was on the run from the DEA, she would turn my ass in for sure and spend all the reward money on heroin. My life would be over and there wouldn’t be shit I could do about it.

  I stood around Carmen’s bedroom for another couple minutes and then I decided to leave. I felt like I was an alien there. The very feelin
g I had when I was in Mario’s house crept over me and I had to shake it, so I left without hesitation. Grandma Hattie and Carmen both walked me out to the truck. I hugged them both and assured them that I would call them to let them know I got home safe.

  Mind Games

  Mario called me at least five times before I answered his call. It was a few minutes after nine when he finally got a chance to hear my voice. I could tell he was really frustrated so I played the apologetic role just to see if his mood would change.

  “What have you been doing all this time? And why have I got to call you ten times before you answer my call?” he whined.

  “Mario, you didn’t call me ten times. You called me four before this last time,” I corrected him.

  “Look, that’s beside the point. What’s up with you?”

  “Nothing is up.”

  “Where are you?”

  “I’m at home.”

  “So, whatcha gonna do? Are you gonna let me see you tonight or what?”

  I sighed. “Mario, I would love to see you but I’ve got a lot of things on my mind and I would not be good company right now.”

  “Come on now, be straight up with me! What’s really going on?”

  “Look, Mario, I’m just having some personal issues right now and it’s nothing you need to concern yourself with.”

  “I understand all of that. But what do you expect me to do in the meantime? Just sit around and wait for you to collect your thoughts?” he replied sarcastically.

  “Mario, I’m really not in the mood to argue with you tonight.”

  “I’m not trying to argue with you either. All I want to know is why the sudden change in your mood this morning? Since you left I’ve been trying to figure out what I’ve done to make you run out on me like you did.”

  “You haven’t done anything! So stop worrying yourself about it.”

  “Why the fuck you keep telling me not to worry when you are still leaving me with nothing to go on?”

  I exhaled loudly. “Look, this isn’t going anywhere, so I’ll talk to you tomorrow after you cool down.”

  “So it’s like that?”

  “It’s not like anything, Mario. I just want to get some rest and who knows, I may feel better tomorrow morning.”

  Irritated, he said, “Yeah, a’ight!” and then abruptly disconnected the call.

  Instead of getting upset behind his antics, I placed my phone down on my coffee table and lay down on the sofa. At that very moment I didn’t have the strength to pick the phone back up to call my family to let them know I made it home safely. I just wanted to be alone and not hear another sound. I got that very wish and without even realizing it, I dozed off.

  The very next morning I was awakened by the sunlight beaming through my mini-blinds. I tried to block it with my hands but the light was too bright, so I got up and started my day. After realizing that it was only a few minutes after eight o’clock, I made myself a cup of hot tea, drank every ounce of it, and then I jumped into the shower. Right after I hopped out of the shower, I lotioned myself down from head to toe and then I slipped on a light blue Puma sweat suit and a pair of all white Puma sneakers. My hair looked a hot mess. I couldn’t do shit with it because it needed to be washed and treated by a professional, so I brushed it back in yet another one of my famous ponytails and called it a day. Not too long after that, I blocked my number and called the rental car company. As soon as the representative got on the phone, I lied and told her that I was in Maryland and I wanted to drop the car off to them.

  “What part of Maryland are you in?” the woman asked.

  “Baltimore,” I replied, since that would have been the most popular answer.

  “What is your name so I can look up your account?”

  It seemed like as soon as I uttered my name, she became weird, and I knew it wasn’t a figment of my imagination. So, I got a little leery and asked a few questions. “Do you have my account up?” was my first question.

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  “Well, what are you doing? Is there something wrong?”

  “No, ma’am, nothing is wrong. But would you be able to wait a couple of seconds while I put you on hold?” she wanted to know.

  And at that point, I knew something wasn’t right. Fear overpowered my entire body so I immediately disconnected my call. “Oh shit! What the fuck am I going to do?” I said aloud after my panic button went off.

  Not knowing what to do next, I paced around the living room and dining room area of my condo. I even looked out the window a few times to see if my place was under surveillance. But every time I looked outside I noticed every car that was parked in my neighborhood was empty, so I felt one percent better. “Oh, my God, what am I going to do?” I asked myself again. I couldn’t come up with a solution. However, I did know that I had to get rid of that truck. The rental car company assumed that I was in the Baltimore area of Maryland, so they were going to have every policeman there on the lookout for me. And who knows, they may have even spread their territory out more and had state troopers on every highway surrounding Maryland on the lookout as well. Shit, they could even call the authorities here and advise them to look out for me, too, which would be fucked-up on my part, so I had to make a move and make it quick.

  I got back on the horn and called Mario. I really didn’t want to be bothered with him, but I had nowhere else to turn. I had to get rid of that truck and there was no doubt in my mind that he would have the connections to get the job done. Immediately after he answered the phone, I asked him was he up and had he gotten dressed yet?

  “Yeah, why?” he wondered aloud.

  “Because I need to see you.”

  “Are you all right?”

  “Not really.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “I don’t want to talk about it over the phone, so can you come by my place?”

  “You know you never showed me where you lived.”

  “I’m not too far from that Check Smart plaza where we met.”

  “Where are you exactly?”

  “I live in this community called Newpointe.”

  “Oh yeah, I know where you are,” he told me. “Give me about fifteen minutes and I’ll be there.”

  “Okay,” I replied, and then the phone went silent.

  Fifteen minutes went by in an instant and just like Mario had promised, he was at my front door before his time limit expired. I had never been so happy to see him. When I opened the door, I fell into his arms like he was my savior.

  “What’s going on?”

  I pulled him inside my place and closed the door behind him. “I can’t take that rental back to the company,” I told him.

  “Why not? What’s the matter?”

  “My ex-boyfriend reported it stolen,” I lied. That was the only excuse I could come up with. I couldn’t tell him I was a fucking fugitive. He probably would have gotten away from me as far as he could.

  “You bullshitting!”

  I didn’t crack a smile. I gave him the most sincere expression I could muster up. “I am dead serious,” I said.

  “Well, how do you know this?”

  “I just got off the phone with the rental agency and the lady told me,” I continued, knowing damn well I didn’t give that woman a chance to say a word.

  “So, whatcha want to do?” he asked me, standing over top of me looking like a giant.

  I looked up into his eyes and said, “I want you to get rid of it.”

  “Get rid of it how?”

  “Get somebody to destroy it.”

  Mario looked at me strange. “Why would you want to destroy it?”

  “So the company won’t be able to find it. I don’t want him to know where I am,” I replied, getting aggravated.

  Mario grabbed me by both my shoulders to keep me still. “Look, Yoshi, that’ll be a bad move. All we need to do is take the truck across state lines and let a state trooper find it. He’ll get in touch with the rental car company so they can come pi
ck it up and you won’t even be around to take the heat.”

  “You sure that’ll be a good idea?”

  “Hell yeah! You don’t want to destroy those people’s shit! They would get your ass for grand theft auto and some more shit.”

  “All right, so when are we going to make this thing happen?”

  “Now,” he said. “Give me a minute and let me make a quick phone call,” he continued, and backed away from me.

  He stepped outside onto the patio and made a two-minute call. When he returned to the house, he told me to hand him the keys to the truck. I grabbed the keys off the countertop in my kitchen and handed them to him. “What’s getting ready to happen now?” I asked him.

  “I’ve got someone coming to get the truck right after we leave.”

  “Where are we going?”

  “I’m gonna take you back to my house because I don’t want you to be around when my boys come out here to handle that situation.”

  Putting up some resistance, I stood there and didn’t move.

  “What’s wrong now?” he asked.

  “Can we go somewhere other than your house?”

  “What’s wrong with my house?”

  “Nothing. I just want to go somewhere else.”

  “Where do you want to go?”

  “It doesn’t matter. Just take me somewhere. I need to get out and get some air so I can clear my head.”

  “Have you eaten?”

  “No.”

  “Are you hungry?”

  “I can eat something small.”

  “Okay, well, get your purse so I can take you to this little spot on Holland Road.”

  Mario and I headed outside to his car, but before he got in he opened up the truck and left the keys inside of it. While we were driving away I took one last look at the truck because I knew that I wouldn’t see it again.

  I felt really funny riding in Mario’s car knowing what I knew about him and his brother, Maceo. I knew I was treading on thin ice, but I had nowhere else to turn. My family would not have been able to help me with my situation, but I knew Mario would, so I had no choice but to call him. I just hoped that when his boys did pick up the truck, they didn’t fuck around and get caught with it.