The Misfortune Cookie: An Esther Diamond Novel

by Resnick, Laura

  Max continued, “The conventionality of cursing someone with death via an ensorcelled object means that I have previous experience with related phenomena, and also that I have found substantial research material to rely on for some of the specifics of this particular method.”

  I rose to my feet and started putting the remains of our dinner into the little mini-fridge that Mr. Chen kept here for pack lunches and leftovers. “So how do we take the whammy off the next misfortune cookie that comes along?”

  “I’m pleased to say that it’s a simple matter of destroying the cookie via mystical means,” Max replied. “I have already made the preparations in my laboratory, so that we can immediately dispose of any suspicious cookies that we encounter.”

  “Excellent,” I said.

  “There is a catch, however,” Max warned.

  “There always is,” Lucky said on a sigh.

  “All my research on similar conveyance methods strongly indicates—to the extent that I consider it a virtual certainty—that breaking open the cookie is what activates its dark magic. Until then, although extremely dangerous in terms of its potential, it does no damage.”

  “That’s also in keeping with how we were told Benny died,” I noted. “He was fine after receiving the cookie; it wasn’t until he cracked it open that he died.”

  Max nodded. “In the act of breaking or cracking the cookie, the curse is immediately inflicted. And once engaged, I am sorry to say, it cannot be lifted, mitigated, or redirected.” His expression was grave as he said, “Thus the victim is doomed. Inexorably cursed with death. Nothing can save him or her from that imminent fate. Based on the immediacy with which Benny Yee’s death curse took effect, I postulate it’s unlikely the victim will survive more than a few minutes after the cookie is cracked. Certainly not more than a few hours, anyhow.”

  “Well, that’s grim,” said Lucky.

  We all looked at the fortune cookies which had come with our meal. They were still sitting on the big desk where we’d just had dinner.

  “I may never eat another one of those things again,” I said.

  “These don’t look like the one that killed Benny,” Lucky pointed out.

  “Even so . . .”

  He nodded. “You’re right, kid. I’ve lost my appetite for these things, after what Max just said.”

  “Obviously,” said Max, “we must be vigilant. Rather than risk another murder, any suspect cookie should be seized immediately so that I can safely destroy it. But such seizure must be conducted with the utmost care. Any damage that the cookie sustains before I am able to nullify its dark power is likely to be fatal.”

  “You mean that even after the cookie is no longer in the presence of the victim,” I asked, “cracking it will still cause his death?”

  “Or it may cause the death of the person carrying it,” said Max. “It depends on the intention, the method, and the skill being exercised in the creation of the curse, and we don’t have that information at this time.”

  “In other words,” I said, really starting to dread the next cookie, “if Benny’s secretary had gotten hungry and broken open the cookie herself, or if she had tripped and dropped it while giving it to him . . . We don’t know which one of them would have died, but one of them would probably be toast?”

  “Precisely.” Max looked at both of us with concern. “So if you take possession of a potential misfortune cookie, you must be very careful.”

  “That does it,” Lucky said darkly. “We gotta put this killer out of business. What if Benny had given that cookie to one of his grandkids, for chrissake? What then? Huh?”

  “Oh, my God,” I said, realizing the horrific extent of the Evil we were confronting. “Either the child might die as a result of breaking open his treat, or his grandfather might die right in front of him.”

  Max nodded. “Lucky is correct. We must find and stop this killer. Otherwise—”

  He was interrupted by Nelli suddenly jumping to her feet and growling menacingly at the closed door. We heard a footstep and realized someone was on the other side of it.

  Lucky rose quickly, pulled a gun out of his waistband, and ordered me in a low voice, “Get under the desk and stay there. Now.”

  13

  Feng shui

  A system of geomancy for orienting and organizing buildings, structures, and spaces.

  I was about to crawl under the desk, as instructed, when there was a knock on the door. Then a man’s anxious voice called, “Alberto? Are you in there?”

  “Oh, good God,” Lucky said in exasperation, lowering his gun. “I’m getting way too jumpy.”

  “As am I.” Max took a steadying breath. “I thought Nelli had detected a demonic being or menacing entity.”

  Nelli’s tail wagged a little with uncertainty as she realized the new arrival was not a threat.

  “Alberto?” called the voice, sounding alarmed.

  “That’s Mr. Chen, isn’t it?” I said, heading for the door.

  “The way our favorite familiar growled, Nathan probably thinks there’s a demonic being in here.” Lucky called, “Yeah, it’s me, Nate. Everything’s fine.”

  I shoved Nelli aside and opened the door for John’s father. Since we hadn’t really met, I introduced myself, then I apologized for our dog—whom he was eyeing with alarm. Nathan Chen was not as tall as his two sons, but he had the same trim build, good posture, and attractive features. His lined face was pleasant, his hair was mostly gray, and he looked about sixty.

  “Nelli, calm down,” I admonished.

  Canines are among the most socially oriented animals on the planet, so they’re very sensitive to etiquette. Nelli, by now, realized she had growled at someone who was a friend of her pack, so she was embarrassed and eager to rectify this blunder. But the grinning and panting apologies of a dog the size of a Shetland pony could be a little off-putting to a stranger unfamiliar with Nelli’s goodhearted nature—especially if he was not a dog person, which John’s father clearly was not.

  As I pulled Nelli out of his way so he could enter the room, Mr. Chen’s gaze fell on the gun in Lucky’s hand.

  “Is there bad news?” he asked sharply. “Are you in danger?”

  “No, no,” Lucky assured him, setting the gun down on the desk. “I’m just tense. Been cooped up for too long.”

  Mr. Chen nodded. “This isn’t good for you, stuck inside here for two weeks. I think it’s time to risk moving you. John’s worked out a plan for . . .” He glanced at me and Max, then said, “Well, we can discuss the details later.”

  “I ain’t ready to move yet,” said Lucky. “We gotta solve this thing first. Then I’ll get out of town.”

  “You’re that convinced Benny was murdered? And that whoever killed him is a threat to others?” Mr. Chen asked.

  As he answered, I could see that Lucky was thinking of the grandchildren to whom Benny Yee might so easily have given that deadly cookie. “Yeah. Me and the doc and the kid, we’re gonna see this through, like we always do. And then I’ll be ready to make a move.”

  “The doc and the kid?” Nathan repeated. “This is starting to sound like a Western.”

  “How do you do, sir? I’m Dr. Maximillian Zadok. You were so busy during Mr. Yee’s wake that I did not have the pleasure of an introduction then.” As he extended his hand in greeting, Max added, “I hope our canine companion didn’t alarm you too much just now.”

  “She’s a bit startling,” was the tactful reply, “but I can see that she meant no harm.”

  They chatted for a couple of minutes, both civilized men with Old World manners. Max complimented Nathan Chen on his well-run business and his fine sons. Mr. Chen, in turn, expressed an intention (insincere, I assumed) to visit Max’s West Village occult bookstore one of these days.

  “What are you doing here, anyhow?” Lucky asked him. “I though
t this was your game night.”

  “I think I’m coming down with a cold. So I left early and came back here to get some paperwork to do at home, in case I’m not well enough to come in tomorrow.” He added to me and Max, “I don’t want to sneeze and cough on the bereaved.”

  “Indeed, no,” said Max.

  I glanced at the clock on the wall and said, “Oops, I’ve got to go. I’m supposed to meet Ted at Lily’s shop soon.” I hadn’t been there before, but I had the address, and it was an easy walk from here.

  “Ah, Lily Yee?” Mr. Chen smiled fondly. “Please give her my regards.”

  “Of course.”

  “Shall I accompany you, Esther?” Max said. “If Lily is there, it might be an opportunity for me to pursue my inquiries.”

  “Good idea,” Lucky said briskly. “And I’ll pursue mine.”

  Observing the spring in Max’s step as he gathered his things and started donning his heavy coat, I realized, without surprise, that he was looking forward to seeing Lily again. I hoped he would actually remember to pursue relevant inquiries when speaking to her . . . But I knew how hard it could be to hold a train of thought when you’re fatally attracted to the person you’re speaking with, so I vowed to refrain from quizzing him on the results of the conversation.

  When Max picked up Nelli’s pink leash, Lucky said, “Uh, Doc, maybe you could leave her here?”

  “Here?” Max repeated.

  “Here?” blurted Mr. Chen.

  “I could use the company,” Lucky said. “It gets pretty quiet in here at night.”

  “Ah. Yes,” I said. “I guess it would.” What with no one else in the building being alive, and all. “And a dog is a good companion.”

  “Also a good ally when confronting Evil,” said Max. “Brave, stalwart, valiant, and true.”

  Nelli wagged her tail and drooled a little.

  Max added to Lucky, “I am sure Nelli would be delighted to keep you company, my dear fellow. But, er, she does need to go outside from time to time, you know.”

  Lucky looked at Nathan Chen, who sighed and gave in.

  “Remember?” he said to Lucky. “We almost never use it, but if you go down through the basement and then back up the stairs on the other side of the cellar, there’s a door that leads to the alley that’s behind Kwong’s Carry-Out. It’s not scenic or fragrant, but it will probably serve your purpose.”

  “No CCTV cameras back there?” Lucky asked.

  “No.”

  “That’ll do, then.”

  “Well, then, Nelli,” Max said to his familiar, “you’ll be keeping Lucky company for a while.”

  Lucky said, “We should call John and ask him to drop off some dog chow on his way home tonight.”

  “He’ll be out late,” said his father. “He and Bill Wu are rehearsing tonight.”

  “Right, the lion dance.” Lucky said, “Well, I’ll be up late, too, so whenever he gets here is fine.”

  “Come on, Max,” I urged. “Ted’s expecting me soon.” Punctuality is one of the key components of professionalism for actors, and I am religious about it.

  Nelli seemed a little surprised not to accompany us when we left, but since she was very fond of Lucky, she made no objection. And she had her juicy bone, after all, which seemed to be her priority anyhow.

  The brutal wind that had been whipping through Chinatown all day had finally died down, but it was bitterly cold tonight. Despite the chill, though, the streets of this neighborhood were as busy as ever. Red banners and bright gold good luck symbols hung in windows and around doorways, waiting to welcome the New Year the following week. Shoppers were examining produce on the market tables that were set up outside of small greengrocers. The restaurants we passed were all crowded with noisy diners, and the bright lights and bustling crowds imbued the cold night with energy and cheer.

  Feeling refreshed by our lively surroundings, I realized how tedious it must be for Lucky to be cooped up in the funeral home all the time. I wondered if John, who was skilled with hair and makeup, could create a disguise for him—one that would conceal his identity well enough for him to get out and about, as long as he was careful. If nothing else, at least he could take Nelli for a walk each day, which would suit them both. I decided to mention it to John next time I saw him . . .

  Which turned out to be five minutes later, since he was inside Yee & Sons Trading Company when we arrived there.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked in surprise, smiling at him as Max and I entered the shop.

  He smiled, too. “I wanted to talk to Ted, so I stopped by here on my way to go rehearse with Bill.” John greeted Max, then said, “Dad called my cell a few minutes ago and told me you were on your way here. He says Dr. Zadok is leaving his trusty steed with us for a few days, and I have to go pick up some food for her.”

  “You’ll need a lot of food,” I warned him.

  “I figured.”

  “Hello, Miss Yee, how nice to see you again.” Max removed his furry cap as he greeted Susan, who was behind the cash register of the store. “This is still a family business, I see. Do you work here full-time?”

  “I help out as much as I can,” she said. “But I’m at school a lot.”

  “Susan’s a grad student in architecture,” said John.

  I was a little surprised by how humble the shop was, since the Yees were a prominent family. Although clean and cheerful, it was a tiny storefront, and when I looked around at the stock, it was all just cheap souvenirs, the sort of tacky junk I would never waste my hard-earned money on. Susan was a student, and Ted was an impoverished indie filmmaker, so Lily and her offspring presumably relied on the income from the store. Did this place really support them?

  “As an architect,” Max asked Susan, “do you take an interest in feng shui? I notice the door is slightly tilted, and a mirror faces it. Are these deliberate choices, or happenstance?”

  “If I’m not being tested on something or assigned it as a project, then I don’t have time to take an interest in it,” Susan said. “I have a heavy course load.”

  She certainly found time to harangue her brother in public, though, I thought.

  “Ah.” Max nodded politely. “No doubt your mother appreciates your help here.”

  “No doubt,” said Susan, obviously not in a friendly mood tonight. I saw an open textbook behind the cash register, along with a notebook, a big cup of coffee, and some pens and highlighters, and I realized she probably wanted to get back to her studying.

  So I asked, “Is Ted here? He’s expecting me.”

  “Yeah, he’s around. He said you’d be trying on some of the dresses we’ve got here. For his film.” She rolled her eyes when she said the final word. Then she looked toward the back of the shop and bellowed at the top of her lungs, “Ted! Esther and John are here! Ted! TED!”

  I winced at her volume.

  There was a pause, and then we heard very faintly, from somewhere in the distance, “Send them up!”

  “Up where?” I asked Susan.

  She pointed to the back of the shop. “Go around the corner, past the shelves, make a left, go up the stairs there, make a sharp right, up more stairs, double back, and you’ll find him.”

  “Oh, good,” said John. “As long as it’s simple.”

  She added, “Shout for Ted if you get lost.”

  “Is your mother here, by any chance?” asked Max.

  “My mother?” she said in surprise. “Yeah, somewhere. She’s doing inventory. I haven’t seen her for a couple of hours. Maybe Ted knows where she is.”

  Susan sat down and started reading her textbook, which I took as a clear indication that she wanted us to go away now. So we did.

  At the back of the shop, we went around the corner, into another room, and walked past a bunch of shelves featuring beautiful Chinese dolls, the kind t
he look like court ladies from an imperial dynasty. I was puzzled by why this merchandise, so much nicer than the stuff I’d already seen, wasn’t in the front of the store—or even in the window. My perplexity deepened as we made a left and found ourselves in a section of the shop stocked with a fine array of religious carvings, statues, and little altars. This was quality stuff, a whole different level of merchandise than the cheap trinkets in the front of the store. I began to realize how deceptive the humble storefront was—and how capable this place probably was of supporting the Yee family, after all.

  Looking around, John said, “I’m sure this stuff used to be in the front of the store. And the cheap stock that’s there now used to be in the basement.” He shrugged. “I suppose Mrs. Yee decided to shake things up a little.”

  Recalling the obsession that Fenster & Co. had with thieves, I said, “I wonder if the reshuffle had something to do with shoplifters? It’s pretty easy to walk out of a store with something that’s shelved only four feet from the door. Maybe Lily decided it was good business to use the front of the store for the cheapest stuff.”

  “Maybe so,” said John.

  It seemed a shame, though, given how much nicer most of Lily’s merchandise was than you’d guess upon looking in the window. A lot of people must walk right past this place who would come in and browse if they had any idea what nice stuff lay further inside, where passersby couldn’t see it. Well, maybe Yee’s had a reputation that ensured people came inside, anyhow.

  “Oh! Wrong way, I guess,” John said in surprise as we turned a corner and found a staircase that was going down rather than up. “I must’ve got turned around.”

  “Understandable,” said Max. “I’m feeling rather disoriented.”

  “Let’s double back and try going in the other direction,” I suggested.

  As we did so, John said, “They’ve really changed things a lot since the last time I was here. Everything’s in a different place.” He laughed wryly and added, “It seems like even the walls and stairs have moved.”

  “How long ago were you here?”