Fighting Fate

by Barbara Speak

  "Can I ask you something?"

  I wasn't sure I wanted to hear any more but he didn't wait for my permission.

  "Have I fucked up my chance with you?"

  I pulled out of his arms and spun around to face him.

  "Why would you think you have done anything wrong?"

  He rolled onto his back and ran his hands back and forth over his head looking up at the ceiling.

  "I feel like all I'm doing is pushing you away when I'm trying like hell to pull you closer."

  He sat up and grabbed my good hand.

  "I really like you, Daisy. I don't want to screw this up."

  I climbed into his lap, straddling him.

  "How can you honestly say that after I managed to get in a fist fight, almost threw up trying to give you head and now we can't have sex. Why would you still want me?"

  Without hesitation came, "Because you're the craziest, most amazing thing that has ever happened to me and I'm not ready to let this feeling go."

  That was it. The words that solidified I was going to get my heart shattered if he ever changed his mind.

  "I think you just made this awful day into one I will always want to remember."

  He grabbed my face and kissed me, "That's been my plan all along. Now, let's get some sleep. I have a wedding to be in tomorrow."

  He laid back pulling me with him.

  "Don't get any funny ideas and try to take advantage of me while I sleep."

  "Wouldn't dream of it."

  "I'm pretty sure it will be all you dream about. I mean come on, you’re sleeping naked next to me, who wouldn't?"

  "Go to sleep, Mike!"

  Chapter 11

  "Wake up, sleeping beauty."

  Okay, Blythe would never say something so nice and her voice sure as hell isn't that low. If who I thought was still lying next to me, this day was going to be amazing!

  My eyes popped open and sure enough Mike was staring back at me. A smile took over my whole face as I said, "Hi there, handsome."

  "Whoa." He shot back about three feet, almost falling off the bed.

  No way! No way! NO WAY IS THIS HAPPENING! I can't believe I just introduced my morning breath to Mike.

  I jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom to scrub my teeth immediately.

  "You're going to make your gums bleed if you keep going like that."

  I spit, rinsed and spit again.

  "Please don't make fun of me. I can't help it."

  Mike walked over to stand behind me and then brushed my hair over my left shoulder, exposing my neck. His lips met my skin and chills took over everywhere. I watched him in the mirror and then noticed my nipples could cut glass¸ since they were his main focus. Great! Another thing to be mortified about. Could luck ever go my way?

  "Have I ever told you just how breathtaking you are?"

  His hands came around me and cupped both breasts.

  "Are you referring to the breath you just had to hold onto for dear life?"

  "Nope. I'm talking about the perfection that I get to see in this mirror."

  "You are pretty perfect."

  He smiled and then leaned down to kiss my shoulder again.

  "You know, just because we can’t have sex doesn't mean that we can't still have fun."

  Now I was the one smiling.

  "Really?"

  "Yes, really."

  I turned to face him but he angled his head away from me.

  "You're not the only one who needs to brush their teeth you know."

  This time I laughed.

  "Thank God you said something. I didn't want to hurt your feelings but damn, you're foul."

  He pushed me off of him but was still smiling, "Go away and let me take care of it. Besides, no one holds a candle to you, babe."

  "If you say so."

  I walked back into the room and grabbed my bag. The wedding was scheduled to start at noon and we had unknowingly slept until nine-thirty, not leaving much time for fun this morning.

  I heard the shower turn on and my memories from the night before began to flood my mind. Should I go for round two? If we had the time I would have been all over that, but with Mike being in the wedding he didn't need the distraction.

  I started to get dressed and noticed how it felt almost strange to wear underwear again after being naked for so long. With my strapless bra and thong already on, I pulled out the dress I had chosen and hung it up to steam. It was a beautiful turquoise blue with gold foil splattered throughout. It had a flutter sleeve on one side, the other sleeve and shoulder were cut out. The ruched sides hugged me perfectly. I couldn't wait for Mike to see me in it. I brought gold strapped, three-and-a-half inch heels to wear with it. Some girls worry about being taller than their man but with my height, it was always a potential problem, so I learned early on not to care.

  Just as I leaned over to grab the bag holding my curling irons and makeup I heard, "Don't move."

  I froze in place.

  "Why can't I move?"

  His voice got closer as I heard, "I want to kill myself for making the no sex rule right about now. Fuck, you are so hot."

  I stood up and faced him admiring how fine he looked in just a towel.

  "You can always break that rule. I wouldn't mind."

  I slowly walked the rest of the room until I came to stand in front of him.

  "That's not even fair."

  I ran my hands up his chest, letting my nails drag all the way up to the back of his head.

  "Nothing is fair in life. Take what you can get and make the most of it, right? And right about now I want you to take what you most certainly can get."

  "Daisy, don't tease a man with little restraint. I am—"

  Bang! Bang! Bang!

  Mike turned to the door and said, "Shit! HOLD ON!" Then to me, "Do you have a robe or something?"

  "I don't. Do you?"

  I was still smiling and ready to make him sweat.

  "This isn't funny, babe. Go to the bathroom or something."

  "Maybe whoever is at the door will have some fun with me if you won't."

  Never in a million years did I mean that, but the look on his face was priceless.

  "Get in the bathroom!"

  "Not going to happen."

  "You bet your ass it is."

  Without warning he threw me over his shoulder and carried me to the bathroom while I laughed the whole way.

  "Don't think of coming out of here until whoever that is is gone. Then you and I are going to get something straight."

  The door slammed behind him while I wondered if my joke was really funny after all. He was pissed.

  I heard the door open and then Colt's voice.

  "She's freaking out because Trish refuses to be in the wedding now and is packing as we speak."

  Oh my God what did I do?

  "So, doesn't she have another friend here to take her place?"

  "Trish won't leave the dress. Sabrina already said she would pay her for it but that stupid bitch won't let her have it."

  "Then she has one less bridesmaid. No one will care."

  "She does."

  I sat on the toilet and felt awful. Listening to the two of them made me realize if I had never come here, none of this would have happened.

  "All right, dude. Let me get dressed and I will be over in a few."

  I heard the door close and then the bathroom door opened with Mike standing there seething.

  "Do you think you're funny?"

  "I did. Now, not so much."

  I looked down at the floor and then back up at him.

  "I feel awful."

  "You should. Making me answer the door with a hard-on is bullshit."

  "I'm not talking about you. I feel terrible for Sabrina."

  "Oh, don't worry about that. She will be fine. You don't know her like I do. That girl is a fighter. She won't let this ruin her day. Colt worries about her too much."

  "Kind of like somebody else I know?"

&nbs
p; "I could never worry about you enough. But more importantly, you need to stop with the sex thing. It's not like it's something I don't want from you. I can't stop thinking about it. But don't you agree that making it special would be so much better, all kidding aside?"

  I have waited this long, I might as well admit that continuing to wait won't kill me.

  "Yes."

  "Good. Now I have to get ready and go meet up with the rest of the guys.

  Are you going to the church with Sadie and them?"

  "I need to call her but yeah, that would probably be the easiest thing to do."

  "Make sure you don't go alone."

  "Mike, I functioned perfectly fine prior to this week by myself."

  "Had I known what I was missing, things would have been a lot different."

  "I would hate to imagine. Go get dressed."

  Once he had on his tux, and let me tell you that no man fills out a tuxedo like Mike does, he went to find the rest of the guys. I sat there on the bed thinking about how crazy life has changed in one week’s time. I went to grab my phone and couldn't help but look down at my hand. It was still so swollen and my knuckles were cut open with scabs on them. Not a proud moment to say the least. If drinking turns me into a person capable of doing that to someone I was never drinking again, at least that's what I told myself.

  I dialed Zoey's number and waited to hear my favorite voice in the world.

  "What up, bitch!"

  "Hey, girly, how are you?"

  "Way more important is how you are? Is it going okay? I want all the details."

  I fell back onto a pillow and started from where Mike picked me up until now.

  "Holy shit, Marissa! What the hell got into you?"

  "I don't know. She was so mean. I just reacted."

  "I'm not even talking about that. Your temper hasn't changed a bit. I'm just shocked to hell that first, you haven't had sex yet and second, you and Mike-fucking-Harrison are together, like for real together. He wouldn't think about waiting if he didn't care about you. This is everything you have wanted. Enjoy it."

  "I'm trying. It's just hard to believe some times."

  "So Bryan is there too, huh? Are you going to spend any time with him or just try to get in Mike's pants?"

  "Zoey!"

  "Well you know what my choice would be but we were always very different when it came to boys."

  "That's why you have also had your heart broken so many times too."

  "Let's not go there and say we did."

  "How is Trace?"

  "Don't want to go there either."

  "You're no fun today."

  "I'm always the life of the party. It's time we switch and you carry the torch."

  "That may be happening whether I like it or not."

  "So are you ready for night two of sleeping in the same bed with a sex God? You know, going down on a guy is amazing if you do right."

  "I can't believe I'm going to even ask but what do I need to do, because what happened was one of the worst experiences of my life."

  "Well first, don't gag."

  She started laughing which only made me want to chuck my phone across the room.

  "That's not even close to being funny!"

  "Yes it was and it had to be done. But seriously, it’s not like there is a wrong way. Open your throat and take it as deep as you can. Whatever makes him clinch his ass cheeks together and say, slow down or I'm going to lose it, keep doing."

  "But what if he loses it?"

  "Swallow fast."

  “Shut up! That's disgusting!"

  "Fine, spit it out on him and see how well that goes over."

  "I’m done here. I need to get ready anyway."

  "Sorry for the bluntness but you're getting the X-rated cliff note version. I love you, Mar, have fun and don't overthink anything."

  "Easier said than done. Talk to you later and I love you too."

  I heard her scream, "I want details!" as I hung up and then I just laughed. I love that girl something fierce. The idea that I would have to swallow it just made me gag on the spot, but there was no way I was going to back down from giving him some kind of pleasure, when all he seems to do is want to bring me the same thing.

  I glanced over to the clock and realized I only had twenty-five minutes left before my brother would be here wanting to go. Thank God I finished my hair while Mike was getting ready or I would be screwed. All that was left for me to do was get dressed and put my makeup on. I knew Mike didn't think I needed it but my outfit definitely called for some metallic eyes. I was sure if I did it right he wouldn't even be able to tell. When I finished applying it, I stood back and laughed. He wouldn't notice my ass.

  After I slipped on my dress and shoes I went to stand in front of the mirror and smiled. I looked exactly how I wanted him to see me. My hair was swept over the side of the dress that was cut out, balancing it. My bangs hung right above my eyes pulling the look together.

  I heard the knock on the door, walked over and pulled it open only to find everyone waiting outside of it.

  "Are you trying to show up the bride?"

  Kate was the first one to walk through the door and notice me. I walked back to the bathroom saying, "Is it too much? It's the only dress I brought and..."

  "No, it's perfect. You look beautiful."

  I sprayed on some perfume and then turned back into the room. "Are you sure?"

  Just as I said it, I took in everyone and how amazing they all looked.

  "You guys look great!"

  And they did. Tony, Jason, Dave, Shawn and my brother all had on suits that fit them perfectly. The girls were in an array of different styles but all of their dresses looked perfect on them. I didn't feel so self-conscious after all. Sadie was the one that stood out the most. She was stunning. I'm sure it still had to be hard to be here even if she said it wasn't.

  "Are you ready?"

  Leave it Bryan to expect to have to wait on me.

  "Yes I am, actually. Let's get going. I don't want to be the reason we're late."

  "That's a first."

  "Would you leave your sister alone?"

  Angie slapped him upside the head, making everyone in the room laugh. Bryan walked over to me rubbing where she hit him.

  "You know I love you more than anything, right?"

  I grabbed him and pulled him to me.

  "Always and forever."

  ***

  When we got to the church, everyone was already seated but the men hadn't come out yet. All of us sat on the groom’s side in the front row where family should be. Colt's parents were the biggest pieces of crap for not wanting to be here for their son, but we were going to make up for it tenfold. Sadie and Bryan sat next me but I was the one on the aisle’s end. Do you think that was an accident? Hell no it wasn't. All the girls fought to put me front and center for Mike.

  "He's going to die when he sees you" was all Heather kept saying.

  "Could you guys stop pimping out my sister?"

  "Hey, Bryan?"

  We all turned to Jason to see what he was going to say.

  "I didn't mean for all of you to listen. I'm pretty sure I said Bryan. But anyway, you need to chill out. Mike has been infatuated with your sister forever. She doesn't need any pimping. He's already in love with her." Tony punched him and then whispered something in his ear. All of a sudden he said, "Well, he's not really in love with her."

  "Just shut up already!"

  Tony glanced over at me and saw the look on my face. Shock wouldn't cover describing what I felt. I mean Bryan had said it too, but he didn’t know what he was talking about. There is no way he loved me. He couldn't. He doesn't know me yet. I don't know him. I may say I have been in love with him for all this time but it really is a super crazy ass infatuation. Maybe that's what they were saying. Surely that's all it is.

  Sadie grabbed my hand and squeezed.

  "It's news to me but it's not too hard to believe. You are you."

  Just
as I was about to respond, the door on the side of the church opened and in came Colt followed by Mike and the rest of his groomsmen. They all worked with him at the University coaching, so it made sense that he chose them and not any of the guys that were sitting next to me. They had all moved away after graduation several years ago.

  Sadie nudged me. "Look at his face. It's priceless."

  Sure enough, I looked up to the front of the church and his eyes were boring into me. I smiled and then his face lit up.

  Sadie nudged my side again. "Maybe he's in love after all."

  "Stop it!"

  "Whatever. Let me be distracted and have some fun so I'm not staring down the groom."

  I spun in my seat.

  "I knew it! You kept acting like this was easy. There is no way you would catch me at Mike's wedding to someone else, just saying."

  "Turn around, people are staring."

  I turned to face the front again but this time Mike had a different look on his face. Like he was trying to figure out what was going on. I just smiled again, reassuring him everything was okay. He smiled back at me and then I noticed Colt staring straight at Sadie.

  I glanced out of the corner of my eye and she was staring back. This had to be so hard for both of them.

  "Do you regret anything?"

  She never took her eyes off of him when she said, "Not a second of it. He's exactly where he was meant to be."

  The doors to the back of the church opened and Colt's face lit up like I have never seen. His focus went to the opening and mine went to the gorgeous man standing next to him. He, unlike everyone else, wasn't looking to the back of the room. Instead, he was still staring at me.

  Then I saw his lips move. I stared harder and tried like hell to make out what he was saying but I couldn't. Sadie nudged me again. "You're mine."

  "I'm your what?"

  "No, dork, that's what he is saying to you. Haven't you ever read lips before? "

  "Apparently not as much as you."

  "Ash and I have to do it a lot lately with the kids."