Wrangled
Page 2
“Okay, have it your way,” Charity laughed. “I’ll talk to Russ. This isn’t your problem now, okay?”
“Okay.”
The next day, the cowboys were all real polite, but none of them responded to the flirty looks the girls threw at them. Charity told me that she and Russ had called them together and told them we were all ‘jailbait’. I took that to mean that if they got too familiar, they could get in trouble with the law, like our husband had.
“Did you include me in that?” I asked.
“Not specifically, but we didn’t exclude you. We thought about it, and decided that if we said anything, you’d have cowboys all over you all the time. I didn’t think you’d want that.”
With humor I didn’t know I had, I answered, “Well, maybe not all the time.”
Charity’s eyes twinkled as she said, “I hear you, honey. Just be careful.”
“I will.”
Then Russ and Charity got married, and just a few weeks later their little girl was born. The weather turned warm enough to get outside and let the kids run around like wild animals. Russ opened the swimming pool that we didn’t even know he had, and we spent lots of time there, getting what color we could, even if some of us freckled instead of tanning. The sensation of the sun on our bare skin that had always before been covered was yummy. No more long-sleeved prairie dresses for us.
It wasn’t always play, though. Janet had us start vegetable plants in little pots that went into the greenhouse. By summer, we were planting them in the garden, and we took turns weeding and hand-watering them. With all these mouths to feed, it was a big garden, but the work was familiar, and when it was time to harvest we’d be busy helping her can or freeze the produce for use during the winter. We were glad to do something to help earn our keep.
The ranch hands were busy, too, working dawn to dusk seven days a week, branding the new cattle and working the hay fields, irrigating, repairing broken pipe, moving the herds from pasture to pasture and always, always, riding the fence line and making repairs. It was hot, dusty, backbreaking work that only a certain kind of man is cut out for. But what it did for those men, every one of them, was make their bodies hard and muscular and oh, so tempting for a bunch of teenage girls who had grown up too early.
The group of hands that was on the ranch that year was split. The dozen or so older ones were men who had been injured or were too old to work the rodeo circuit, but still strong, if a little slower than men in their prime. They knew more about cows and horses than the animals knew themselves, and they cared for Russ’s stock like it was their own.
The other half were kids from sixteen to about Russ’s age, late twenties, who found themselves in some kind of trouble young, like Cody had according to Janet. Russ would take them in, straighten them out and offer them work and a place to live until they had a skill they could take on the road and make their own way. Only a few ever stayed more than a year, unless they still had to get to eighteen, but some went to work on ranches around the area once they left the Rocking W ranch. Russ’s boys, as they were known, were in high demand because he had Hank train them good and keep them in line. They turned out to be strong, ranch smart, polite and good workers. Russ told us that he always figured a person would turn out the way you expected them to, so he just expected a lot of his boys and they didn’t fail him.
I think he was probably treating us the same way, because we all wanted to please him and make him proud of us. He felt more like a daddy to us than a brother, even though Charity was more like a big sister. We didn’t try to make that work out right, with them being married and all, it just was. With the boys so busy and shying away from us because of Russ and Charity’s warning, there wasn’t much pairing off going on that summer, just Celeste and her beau, but they were real quiet about it.
Before we knew it, the short summer was over and the short fall was on us. The month of September was the prettiest weather Wyoming had, if you asked me. Warm, sunny days punctuated by short violent thunderstorms, with the hands racing between rains to harvest and bale the hay. The warm days were followed by cool nights that made a girl want to curl up in someone’s arms and share some kisses. The work was winding down for the winter, and that’s when I started hanging on the fence like the hands, watching Cody train his horse.
Tali was eight months when we got to the ranch, and Al was two. Now they had both had birthdays, Al turning three in April right after Tali’s first birthday in March. Now she was running everywhere she went, and trying to follow Al everywhere he went. They were a handful, but the girls and even Charity would always watch them for me while I watched Cody. It was an open secret that I had eyes for him, but he didn’t pay me much attention for a while.
The truth was, I had the itch. I wanted another baby, before the two I had got too much older. And before I could have another baby, I had to have a husband. Everything that went with both goals was okay. I may have been introduced to sex too early, but as long as my husband didn’t take too long about it, or it didn’t happen as a result of punishment, I didn’t mind it. Sometimes I even liked the closeness, but that never lasted long. With so many to see to, the Prophet could only visit each of us one or two times a month. Our lives revolved around the children and our sister-wives, not the husband.
Seeing Charity and Russ together when she came home made me understand there was more to it, so I started watching them close, trying to figure out what they had that I hadn’t known with my husband. For one thing, they laughed and teased. Russ would say something bossy to Charity, and she’d talk back! We could never have done that. Once or twice, when they didn’t know I was watching, she’d say something smart to him and run, and he’d chase her down the hall to their room, laughing. Then they’d disappear for a while behind the closed door. I knew what they were doing, but I couldn’t understand why it was fun for Charity.
Other times, he would have his arm around her, and he’d drop a kiss on her head or cheek, or pull her in for a hug and she would sort of melt into him. She was a lot sweeter than she used to be in Bethel City, too. Then, she had to be punished all the time for using foul language, but she very seldom said anything bad now.
As I had a chance to observe them, I began to understand what love was, and that Russ and Charity had it. I’ll admit I was envious, which is one of the bad sins. But I didn’t covet Russ, that would have been just too wicked. What I coveted was a man to love me like that, and what my eyes wanted was Cody Wayne.
So, now I made a habit of watching him with his horse, Abo. Abo was short for Abogado, which means lawyer in Spanish. I could see why they called him that, because he always seemed to argue with Cody when they started working for the evening. But by the end of the night, he’d be taking Cody’s body-language commands like he was part of Cody or Cody was part of him. It was beautiful to watch, especially because both Cody and Abo were fine to look at.
After a few weeks, I got brave enough to ask some of the hands around the fence what was happening, why Cody did this or the horse did that. I learned that the short piece of rope he tied the calves’ feet with was called a piggin’ string, and that he had practiced his roping skills on foot for a long time, until he could drop a lariat over a fence post, and then a moving animal’s head. Another thing I learned was that the hands weren’t all cowboys. Some of them, including Cody, were wranglers. They didn’t have much to do with the cattle because they specialized in the horses. Russ had a modest paint breeding operation, and Cody was part of the team that broke and trained them before they were sold. It was fun, and interesting, but it got me no further in my goal of catching Cody’s eye.
One night, I decided it was time to make a bolder move. I dressed in one of my prettiest dresses, with a light sweater to keep off the early evening chill. Wearing boots because I was walking around in an area with horses passing back and forth, I leaned on the fence as usual. But this time, whenever Cody managed to rope, throw and tie his calf in under eight seconds I’d give a whoop
and holler. It wasn’t enough to win, but it was respectable, so the other hands started to whoop, too. The first time, Cody looked up startled, and by the time he was done practicing, he was searching for me each time the whoop went up. I just knew he was going to come and talk to me later, and he did.
Leading Abo over to the fence, he said, “Hiya, Annalee. Whatcha doin’ out here?”
“Watching you turn into a champion calf-roper, Cody Wayne, what did you think?” I asked him in turn.
“I dunno. Where’s your kids?”
Lifting my eyebrow to indicate I didn’t know he was even aware I had kids, I said, “Ciara’s watching them until I go inside. Can I watch you take care of Abo?”
“I guess so. I didn’t know you knew my horse’s name.” Well, we were even, then.
“I know a lot more about you than you think, Cody,” I teased.
“Is that right? What-all do you know?” he asked, like he was really curious.
“That’s for me to know and you to find out,” I retorted. I thought it was a good line, one I’d heard in one of the movies we sometimes watched.
“Well, I guess we’ll have to see about that.”
By this time, we were in the barn, and Cody was attending to Abo’s feet after taking off all the tack and then hosing and currying him. He fell silent while he gave Abo some water, and then asked if I’d like to walk with him while he cooled the horse down. We strolled out of the barn, Abo following on the lead, and it was just what I’d been hoping. A near-full moon lit our way, and no one else was around. Suddenly, I was shy and didn’t know what to say.
Before I could think of something, Cody asked me about my kids. “How old are your little ones, now, Annalee? And tell me their names.”
I flushed and was glad the light wouldn’t show it. He couldn’t have said anything more likely to make me like him even more. It made me wonder if he liked kids, or was just trying to make conversation, so I answered shortly. “Alma is three, and Naphtali is eighteen months.”
“I thought one of them was a boy,” Cody said.
“Alma is a boy.”
“Funny name for a boy. I always thought Alma was a girl’s name.”
Stung, I said with a little heat, “He’s named for a man in the Book of Mormon. We call him Al, though.”
“That’s good. If he starts school with a name like Alma, he’d better know how to fight.”
Tears sprang to my eyes, unused as I was to being criticized for my children’s names, and suddenly fearing whether we’d ever fit in here, out in the world. I couldn’t think what to say to that, so I said nothing.
“Naphtali’s pretty, though, for a girl. Is that a woman in the Book of Mormon?”
“No,” I managed to choke out. “It’s a country. But I thought it was pretty, and my husband said it was all right to name her that.”
At the mention of my husband, Cody stiffened. I had to restrain my hand from flying to my forehead in a slap; what a blunder! Even though I had never been legally married, and was not now married in any way, shape or form, mentioning a husband to a beau had to be the worst mistake I could have made.
“I see,” Cody ventured cautiously. “What do you call her for short?”
“Tali.” I had to answer as little as I could, so I wouldn’t make another stupid mistake.
“Oh, that’s cute. I’ve seen all the little ones out playing or splashing around in the pool. They’re like a bunch of puppies, aren’t they?”
Puppies! Yes, that’s exactly what they were like. All aged between Amber’s six-month-old and my Al, they tumbled over one another and argued over toys, just like a litter of puppies. The thought charmed me for a minute.
“Do you like kids, Cody?” I had to ask.
“I guess so. I mean, I never had much to do with little ones, but they sure are cute from where I stand.”
“That’s pretty much like puppies, too,” I said. “Cute from a distance, but they sure make a mess up close. They’re a lot of work.”
“That’s why God gave ‘em mommas, I reckon,” he said.
I shivered a little then, whether because of his mention of God, who had never done me any favors, or because the wind was coming up and I was a bit chilly. Cody looked down at me from his six-foot three height and said, “Are you cold?”
“Maybe a little,” I admitted.
“Here, let me help.” As matter-of-factly as his words, his arm went around my shoulder and blocked the wind. A thrill of excitement went through me. First step made; he’d noticed me. I knew I could build on that.
After that night, we walked Abo together every night that he could practice. Cody said it would get too cold to do it before long. He told me that when he went on the rodeo circuit, he’d go south in the winter, to Texas or somewhere a lot warmer, where he could train Abo year-round. I would have been sad at that, but I thought maybe he’d take me with him.
Even though he often put his arm around me for warmth, it took Cody too long to kiss me. I thought he never would, so I asked him.
“Cody Wayne, are you ever going to kiss me, or do I have to go find me another cowboy to kiss?”
He turned ice-blue eyes on me, and said, “I reckon I wouldn’t like it if you found someone else.” Then he bent to kiss me like a brother, lips to my cheek. I had to figure it was all I was going to get that night. But maybe I’d planted a seed.
The next night, Cody put his arm around me before we even walked out of the barn. We walked Abo about a quarter-mile, to a stack of hay bales that were waiting for a truck to take them out to one of the line cabins the next day. Cody startled me by lifting me at the waist to sit on one of the bales, then moved toward me, eyes intent on mine.
“Annalee, I’ve been wantin’ to kiss you for a while now. If that’s okay with you, I mean.”
In answer, I swayed toward him, and his arms came around me, holding me tight. His lips, chapped from sun and wind, were warm on mine, sending thrills through me. I closed my eyes and kissed back, then drew back, startled, when I felt his tongue on my lips.
“What are you doing?”
“Kissin’ you.”
“With your tongue?”
He laughed. “Haven’t you ever kissed before?”
“Well, yes, but there were no tongues involved.”
“No? Then you haven’t really kissed. Relax, I’ll teach you.”
He touched my lower lip with one finger, teasing it open. Gently but firmly, he pressed one hand against the back of my head and held me still while he kissed me, probing with his tongue until my mouth opened more, all by itself. Then he deepened the kiss, moaning a little as his tongue found its way inside my mouth to tease mine. A hot bolt of lightning went through me then, and if he’d tried it, I would have opened to him and maybe got in trouble. As it was, he only kissed me, long and sweet, with his man-thing pressed against my leg, big and hard. For the first time in my life, I wanted to see it, touch it. But Cody was in charge, and Cody wasn’t in a hurry, or so I thought.
I returned to the house that night with my face red and burned from his day-old beard and my heart racing faster than ever before. Taking my kids from Janey, who had watched them that night, I went to bed and pressed my hands between my legs, making me throb where they touched me in the center. I didn’t know what to make of this, but I knew Charity could help.
“Charity, something happened last night that I need to ask you about.”
“Come on in my room,” she said. “I need to nurse Kitty.”
This wasn’t the first time I’d ever been in her bedroom, but I was struck again by how beautiful it was. Where all of our rooms were Western-themed, with heads of deer and elk on the walls and dark plaid quilts on the beds, hers was soft and pink. Everything was covered in velvet or silk, and it was all in shades of pink chosen to look good together. She sat in a chair with a nursing pillow wrapped around her to support Kitty’s weight, and she had me take a seat on a funny-looking sofa, with a high arm on one end, only half
a back, and then nothing on the other end. She called it a ‘shayz’.
“What is it, Annalee? Boy trouble?”
I blushed, hating being a blonde at that moment. “Sort of,” I admitted. “I wanted to know about a feeling I had. I’ve never had it before, and I’d like to know what it is.”
“Okay. Tell me what you were doing when you got it, and how it felt,” Charity said, adjusting Kitty on her nipple to ease a pinch.
“Well, Cody was kissing me…”
“Oh, Annalee! I’m glad!” she cried.
“Have you ever kissed with your tongue, Charity?” I asked, fearful that the delicious pleasure was forbidden.
“Of course, haven’t you?” Relief flooded through me. This was a normal thing, and it gave me courage to ask my other questions.
“Well, now I have,” I said, blushing even harder. “Cody taught me, last night. And I know he wanted sex, because it was hard.”
“It?” Charity teased, knowing exactly what I meant.
“Charity, don’t make this any harder than it has to be,” I pleaded.
“So to speak,” she muttered, then said, “I’m sorry, go on.”
“Well, after I came in the house and put the kids to bed, I went to bed myself and started thinking about it. And I felt these, waves…I don’t know what else to call them. Down there, you know?”
Charity, with a look of astonishment on her face, said, “Wait, you’ve never felt that before and you have two kids?”
“Yes,” I said, puzzled because I didn’t see what kids had to do with it.
“Honey, your husband has a lot to answer for, not the least of which is teaching you to at least try to enjoy what he was doing to you. Let me give this some thought, maybe I can help. But for now, just know that it’s entirely normal, and I’d say that it’s going to happen more, and more intensely. Don’t worry, you’ll enjoy it.”
I left, feeling relieved but still curious. Charity hadn’t really told me much, but what she did say made me wonder about what I knew, or thought I knew. Even more, I wondered about Cody’s experience. Would he want me, even though I had two kids? Could I satisfy him, if I was too inexperienced to even know how to kiss? I was so distracted by all this that I dropped a quart jar of tomatoes that had just come out of the canner. Bursting into tears, I fled the kitchen, grabbed my kids from the play room and hugged them tight. Al patted me on the face and said, “It’s okay mommy, don’t cry,” and Tali tried to do the same in her little lispy voice. They were so sweet, I didn’t know what I’d ever do without them, even if no man ever wanted me again because I had them.