Unforgiving Temper

by Head, Gail

  “I am content with my own company,” Elizabeth assured her. “Besides, what good would it do? People still wish to believe there is some great scandal to be had even though I have repeatedly offered a rational explanation. My presence only renews their curiosity, and I refuse to place myself in such a position.”

  “We are going to Netherfield. Charles is not like that at all, as you well know,” Jane chided gently.

  “Yes, your Mr. Bingley is very kind indeed; but his sister is another matter and to be in her company for an entire afternoon and evening is not a pleasant thought. Caroline Bingley has been back in the neighborhood but two days and has been more than willing to add to the speculation of my absence. Just yesterday, when I entered the bookshop, I interrupted a tête-à-tête between Miss Bingley and our dear Mrs. Crenshaw.” The pit of Elizabeth's stomach twisted at the memory of the two women standing together. The devastating feelings she had been fighting since her return flared to life once again. “As soon as they saw me, the conversation stopped and they simply looked at each other. I do not believe they were discussing the weather. No, with Caroline Bingley in residence, Netherfield will be no different than any other house in the county. It would be impolite of me to impose myself where I know I am not welcome.”

  “Now you are speaking nonsense! It would be more impolite to disregard Charles' wishes, which are for you to come to Netherfield with me.” Jane met Elizabeth's determination with equal force, adding to the argument. “I know my initial trust in Caroline was misplaced. Her visit to Gracechurch Street last year proved that well enough; but I have great hopes that she will improve now that Charles and I are to be married.”

  “Yes, I think she has enough sense to alter her opinion now. I am glad to see she could not persuade Mr. Bingley against you again. What I am not happy about is that you actually refused him, and at what cost! I know the constancy of your heart. It is a very good thing I came back in time to bring you to your senses!”

  “It was the most difficult thing I have ever done in my life,” she conceded. “During the whole of your absence, he remained steadfast and constant; more than I deserved or could have ever hoped for. With time, Caroline's manner may prove more admirable as well.”

  “Jane, you are too good! I shall never be as good as you, for I shall never have your disposition to think the best of everyone – even someone like Miss Bingley!”

  “But, Lizzy, tell me – you have never cared what she thought before. Why now? Surely you know she has no power over you.”

  Elizabeth paused mid-stroke in brushing Jane's hair and met her sister's eyes in the looking glass. “I must confess, it is not Mr. Bingley's sister that troubles me; rather it is the prospect of facing his friend.”

  “Mr. Darcy?”

  “Yes. I have known, of course, that he would be included in the wedding party, but I shall be very glad if I can be in his company as little as possible while he is here.”

  “I do not understand. I thought your opinion of Mr. Darcy was improved. He and his sister were kind to you in London, were they not?”

  “They were very kind to me. No one could have been more so,” Elizabeth murmured softly before resuming her brushing with brisk strokes. “It is just that I am home now and things are different.”

  “Not so very different,” Jane teased. “At least not yet. We have one more week together before I am married, and we must make the most of every moment! In any case, you are safe from Mr. Darcy today for Charles told me he is not arriving until tomorrow. So, I refuse to accept no for an answer. You must come, if only to make me happy! You have been far too somber and melancholy of late.”

  Elizabeth pressed her lips tightly and blew out a great sigh. “Very well, I shall go if you insist.”

  Happily, Jane spun around in triumph, then caught sight of Elizabeth's pained expression before it was quickly concealed.

  “Lizzy? What is it?”

  “What do you mean?” Elizabeth hedged, knowing full well that Jane had witnessed the brief break in her show of indifference.

  “I mean something is troubling you. You may hide it from the others, but I have seen that look too many times these past weeks when you think no one is looking. Please, tell me.”

  “There is nothing to tell. This is a time to celebrate your well-deserved happiness. I would not do anything to take away the smallest part of it!”

  “Lizzy –” Jane took the brush from Elizabeth's hand and pulled her down next to her. “You are unhappy and that makes me unhappy. You know that. My mind will not be at ease until I know what is wrong.”

  “This is not the time, Jane. I am well enough. Truly.”

  Jane looked askance at Elizabeth's stoic expression. “Do you really think I will be satisfied with that? Please do not shut me out these last few days we have together.”

  It took another moment before Elizabeth's shoulders slumped in defeat. “This is one time I wish that you did not know me so well. I had hoped to see you wed and incandescently happy as Mrs. Charles Bingley before I would have to say anything.”

  Taking up the brush again, Elizabeth rose and swept it through Jane's hair in long, slow strokes as she ordered her turbulent thoughts.

  “When I was in London…no, that will not do. I believe I must go back to my visit with Charlotte last spring.”

  “Last spring?” Jane looked confused. “Do you mean to tell me you have carried this with you all this time and you said nothing. Tell me what happened!”

  “When we met in London at the end of my visit to Kent, you were so unhappy with the outcome of your own stay in London that I could not bear to burden you with my own troubles.”

  “Troubles? Oh, Lizzy! I am sorry. I should have been more attentive. I should have – ”

  “ – been exactly as you were. Your heart was broken! How could you be anything else? Besides, at the time, I had no idea it would turn out like this.”

  “Turned out like what?”

  Knowing she could no longer avoid relating what had passed between herself and Mr. Darcy, Elizabeth resigned herself to her fate. At this point, it would be better to just come straight to the point and get it over with.

  “When I was visiting Charlotte in Kent, Mr. Darcy was there also, visiting his aunt, Lady Catherine. We spent some time together and ultimately, he made me an offer, which I refused.”

  “An offer…of marriage?! Mr. Darcy?” Jane gasped in surprise. “That is astonishing! Not that it is surprising he should want to marry you; but he always seemed so severe.” She sat in utter dismay, trying to comprehend the news. “And you refused him?”

  “Yes, well – I will say in my defense that his mode of declaration was far from flattering, but I fear the manner of my answer was equal to that of his offer. It was not an agreeable exchange.”

  “Oh, my! No wonder you do not want to see him. If I had known, I would have tried to dissuade Charles from having Mr. Darcy come at all.”

  “No, Jane. They are the best of friends and I would not wish to deprive Mr. Bingley at such a happy time.”

  “Charles would understand, I am sure of it. Perhaps it is discomforting for Mr. Darcy as well.”

  “I cannot speak for Mr. Darcy.” A wave of loss washed over Elizabeth, flooding her mind with thoughts of their last interview. “As for me, so much has happened to alter my opinion since that unfortunate affair. As you once suggested, he did indeed improve upon closer acquaintance, very much so.” The wave swelled again, filling her eyes with unwelcome tears as she whispered, “Oh, Jane! Such a union would have answered my every dream!”

  “Then you do not dislike him? You are in love with him?!” Utterly astonished, Jane's eyes sought Elizabeth's in the mirror. Seeing the abject misery reflected in them, she turned and gently wrapped her arms around her sister. “I am sorry, Lizzy! Perhaps it is possible to regain his good opinion. You did say your stay with the Darcys was pleasant.”

  “It may have been possible at one time,” Elizabeth replied, draw
ing a ragged breath. “Indeed, he was most attentive while I was at Burnham House, and I was hopeful – that is, until I received your letter telling me of Lydia's elopement with Mr. Wickham.”

  “It was a terrible thing at first, but it all came to a satisfactory ending. They are married now. Surely he will not hold that against you.”

  “No, he would not; but that particular connection has dashed any chance of another offer from Mr. Darcy, especially now that they are married.”

  “I do not understand. How can that be a bad thing?”

  “Mr. Wickham has done a great injustice to the Darcys, one that can never be forgiven. As he has now married our sister, it would be impossible for Mr. Darcy to renew his addresses to me.”

  “This is dreadful! Can nothing be done?”

  “No, there is nothing, and I have only myself to blame. Had I not been so blinded by my prejudice, things might have been very different.” Dashing the glistening drops from her cheeks, Elizabeth sat Jane down in front of the mirror once more and attempted to lighten the mood. “As it is, I shall become the maiden aunt who shall teach your ten children to embroider cushions and play the piano forte very ill!”

  “Lizzy, do not say such a thing!”

  “Nevertheless, it is true. Fortunate for me, Mama is content you have made a match that shall save us all from the hedgerows!” Elizabeth's smile faded as quickly as it had come. “No, I shall not marry. I cannot have what I desire and I now know I cannot settle for anything less.”

  The sisters fell silent, neither knowing what else to say as Elizabeth began weaving Jane's hair into silken braids.

  “As for today,” Elizabeth finally exclaimed, “we shall go to Netherfield and have a lovely time – in spite of Caroline Bingley – and then I shall keep to myself as much as possible until the wedding is over. Just have a care after you are married not to invite me for a visit when Mr. Darcy is about!”

  * * * *

  Charles Bingley turned from the window as Caroline swept into Netherfield's drawing room, wearing an expectant look which quickly faded when she saw her brother was the sole occupant.

  “Caroline, Jane and her sister will be here any moment and I expect you to be the model of hospitality.” Charles eyed his sister meaningfully. “The sooner you accept that Jane is going to be my wife and the mistress of this house, the better it will be for you.”

  Caroline faced her brother wide-eyed. “Charles, really! I think Jane Bennet is a delightful creature and I am astonished that you would speak to me so.”

  “Do not play the innocent with me. I overheard your conversation with Mrs. Crenshaw yesterday. Wedding or no, you will be back in Scarborough before the week is out if I hear so much as a whisper of scandal coming from your lips again.”

  “Oh, Charles, do be reasonable! The entire Bennet family is simply dreadful – except for your dear, sweet Jane, of course. The father is a useless invalid, the mother has not the least idea what it means to have good manners, and the youngest daughter is a ridiculous flirt who eloped with the son of a steward.”

  “That is enough, Caroline.”

  “Louisa is quite right, you know. Grandfather and Father are sure to be turning over in their graves. They spent their whole lives working to raise our family's position in society, only to have you pull us down with such poor connections. Mrs. Crenshaw told me all about Miss Eliza Bennet's mysterious travels. I find the whole explanation entirely too neat. Heaven only knows what she really did all those months she was gone. How do you expect me to make a suitable match if our friends hear – ”

  “Enough!” snapped Charles. “You know nothing about it, and I forbid you to utter another word against the Bennet family!”

  Caroline's petulant expression crumpled under her brother's glare. Any further attempt to dissuade him from what she obviously thought a disastrous course was prevented by the entrance of a footman. Charles' full attention was immediately diverted as he spied Jane and Elizabeth following behind.

  “Ladies, welcome to Netherfield!” he exclaimed heartily.

  Turning to the two sisters with a broad smile, Caroline's greeting was almost as enthusiastic as her brother's.

  “Jane, dear, we are so happy you could come – and Miss Eliza, too!” As the new arrivals rose from their curtsey, Caroline quickly latched onto Jane's arm, pulling her a few steps away from Elizabeth, but it was not enough to prevent being overheard. “I am so glad your poor sister decided to come. I do not imagine she has had much opportunity to be in good company since she – well, since she returned to Hertfordshire. Charles and I are resolved to do everything we can to help her back into society. You must not let this little setback worry you in the least.”

  Looking back to Elizabeth, whose expression gave no indication Caroline's impertinent remarks had had any effect, Jane offered a hesitant smile that brightened considerably as Charles came forward to claim her from his sister. “Come, my dear, sit near the fire and warm yourself. Miss Elizabeth, please sit here. I hope you found the ride from Longbourn comfortable and you are not too chilled by the weather.”

  “Not at all,” Jane assured him, her cheeks already glowing under his gaze. “Thank you for sending your carriage.”

  Elizabeth smiled inwardly at her sister's radiance. Nothing would induce her to spoil this time for her, not even Mr. Bingley's superior sister. “Yes, we were quite comfortable. You are very kind.”

  “I cannot tell you how glad I am that you came, Miss Elizabeth,” Bingley pronounced warmly. “I have not seen you for some time. You seem to be always out walking when I have come to call at Longbourn.”

  “You do not find the weather too formidable?” Caroline asked with feigned concern.

  “Actually, I find it quite invigorating this time of year.”

  “Ah, yes, you are a great walker, as I recall.”

  “Yes, I enjoy the exercise; and it has the advantage of greater solitude as those less enthusiastic are wont to stay indoors. It is not for the faint of heart. Would you not agree, Miss Bingley?”

  Bingley cleared his throat as Caroline opened her mouth to respond, sending a warning to keep to herself the retort he saw coming. It also had the unintended result of turning everyone's attention to himself. After an obvious effort to think of something to say, his face brightened.

  “I almost forgot!” he cried cheerfully. “I have not yet told you of our surprise.”

  Elizabeth smiled. “A surprise? I must confess, Mr. Bingley, you are such an unpredictable creature that it is almost impossible not to be surprised at anything you do!”

  “I am happy to say that I am not the only one who can be unpredictable; and I believe this particular surprise may be of special interest to you, Miss Elizabeth. I had no idea of – ” Bingley's speech and Elizabeth's growing curiosity were interrupted by Caroline's sudden exclamation.

  “Mr. Darcy! We were beginning to think you had forgotten us!”

  Elizabeth froze at Caroline's greeting, unwilling to believe what she had heard. Please, not him – not now! But the deep, resonant voice that came in reply was indeed that of the very person she had hoped to avoid. Her heart pounded violently, feeling as if it would burst at any moment. Frantically she looked everywhere but at him, struggling to keep at bay the warmth she felt flooding her cheeks. What would he think of her after all that had passed in the nearly two months since she had left Burnham House? Would he show his disapproval – or worse still, would he be patronizing and condescending?

  Obviously uncomfortable with the outburst directed toward him, Darcy bowed with measured movement, first to Caroline and then to Elizabeth and Jane. “My apologies for keeping you all waiting. There was an unavoidable delay which prevented me from being as punctual as I would have liked.”

  “Do not trouble yourself, Mr. Darcy,” Caroline chirped brightly. “You have not kept us waiting at all. In fact, Miss Bennet and her sister have only just arrived. Is that not so, Charles?” She turned to her brother with a brilliant smile
and then back to Darcy. “So you see, you have not missed a thing. Do come sit down. I was just about to ring for tea.”

  With each step that brought him closer, Elizabeth found it more and more difficult to breathe. Why did I not stay home safe and sound in my own room!

  She knew he had settled near Mr. Bingley, but she could not bring herself to look at him. A glance at Jane was enough to know that her sister was just as surprised and plainly distressed. She also saw that Jane was blaming herself for the misery of the situation and she could not allow that. Finally summoning the courage to face him, Elizabeth had the misfortune of looking in his direction at the very same moment Caroline chose to pursue the worst of all possible subjects.

  “Miss Eliza, I hear that your youngest sister has married Mr. Wickham. And only 16! Are we to have the pleasure of their company at the wedding?” The hint of satisfaction in her voice was unmistakable as she turned to Darcy. “He was the son of your father's steward, was he not?”

  Darcy's mouth tightened into a thin line as he glanced in Elizabeth's direction. “Yes, he was, but I have had little contact with him since my father died.”

  Elizabeth had no doubt as to the real target of the spiteful comment. Without hesitation, she rose to the challenge. “My sister and her husband are unable to attend, Miss Bingley. They removed to Newcastle shortly after their marriage. The distance and duties of his new position make the journey impossible.”

  “What a pity,” Caroline lamented. “I so wanted to wish them happy. Perhaps there will be another time?”

  “Perhaps.”

  “Darcy!” Bingley exclaimed, instantly pulling the conversation in his direction again. “I cannot believe you made the ride from Pemberley to Netherfield in just two days! I did not expect you until tomorrow at the very earliest.”

  “Good roads and good weather make it an easy distance. When my business was concluded sooner than I had anticipated, I saw no reason to delay my departure.” Darcy glanced towards Elizabeth as he spoke, but she had already averted her eyes.