Pearl's Will

by Sophie Dawson

  Will wished Pearl had told him what his mother had been doing. She never would have though. The guilt she took upon herself over his parents’ reaction to their marriage prevented her ever mentioning a problem with them.

  She also carried a burden his confession of love had placed on her shoulders. Her reaction of ’Oh, Will’ had been filled with so many emotions; grief, despair, hope, longing, and maybe a tiny bit of reciprocation of love. Maybe he was projecting his desire for Pearl to love him into her words. Daily, Will prayed for her to move passed her mourning for Patrick and begin to feel a greater affection for himself. The way his mother had been treating Pearl certainly didn’t help.

  Will shook the tension from his shoulders as the shop door opened. Seeing who entered tightened them up again— his mother. He let out his breath in a soft sigh. Just what he needed to start his week off on the wrong foot.

  Pearl and he had gone to church, even sitting with the rest of his family. Pearl had been pale and stiff, twisting her handkerchief until he’d laid his hand over hers in her lap not caring if anyone else saw. She needed his support more than keeping up proper decorum. They’d begged off going to his parents’ house for Sunday dinner with the rest of the family. They had just said Pearl was tired, implying it was her condition. They’d gone to a diner for dinner then home. Although spending Sundays with family occurred every week, Will enjoyed having the day of rest with only Pearl. He planned to do so at least once a month, if they ever went back to joining the rest of his family for the afternoon.

  Will stood to greet Luella. “Good morning, Mother.” He gave her a light kiss on her cheek then sat back down. Turning back to the workbench, he picked up the watch he’d been working on when the customer came into the shop.

  “Will, we missed you yesterday. You and Pearl,” Luella said.

  “Pearl was tired. We thought it best she rested at our home.” He focused on the watch, not looking at her as she sat in the other swiveling desk chair.

  Silence hung like a heavy curtain between them. As much as he loved his mother, Will couldn’t act as if nothing was wrong between them. Pearl was his wife and deserved his support.

  “Will… Um… I…” Luella stammered.

  He remained silent working on the watch.

  “Will, I’ve thought a great deal about why I was being so very hard on Pearl. I was totally in the wrong and I’m sorry.”

  The words came out in a rush. He looked at her but didn’t say anything.

  “I will say I was shocked to learn of your marriage. I’d seen your interest in Pearl before we left on our trip. You remember I warned you, no, that’s the wrong word. I mentioned my concern over your attraction to her. My concern wasn’t disapproving of Pearl. It was because she was grieving and had an entire year of mourning to get through. I didn’t want you to be hurt if you pinned your hopes on her only to have Pearl not return your affections. I took that out on her at that time too, which was wrong of me. It wasn’t her. She’s a wonderful young woman. It’s me.”

  Luella took a deep breath and pulled her handkerchief from her sleeve. “Pearl sent me this while we were in Hot Springs. I know she realized I was treating her poorly before we left. I know she couldn’t figure out why I suddenly was treating her like a pariah. Still, she wrote about the lacework she was doing and her excitement about the wedding gown. She thanked me several times for helping her get the commissions and for how well her lace was selling. This handkerchief was a small token of her gratitude.” She spread the cotton square with its wide lace border on the tabletop, smoothing it with her hand.

  “If she hadn’t been in mourning, I might have endorsed your interest in her. But then, again, maybe not.” Luella’s shoulders sagged. “I realized after you banished me from your house what my real issue was. I was jealous of her. Jealous that she was replacing me as the most important woman in your life. If you married her, you wouldn’t need me anymore.”

  “Mother, Pearl isn’t replacing you. You’ll always be my mother. She’s my wife.”

  “I know, but you’ll always be my little boy.”

  Will took her hand in his. Softly, he said, “I haven’t been your little boy for a number of years now. I’m a grown man. I’ve worked in this shop since I was in my mid-teens. Now, with Father’s health not good, I run it. I’m building on the legacy Grandfather started and Father built on.

  “You and he raised me to be self-reliant. I’m able to manage my life successfully because of what you both taught and all the support you gave me. I’ll be forever grateful for it all. Now, my life includes another woman who isn’t replacing you. She adds to the richness of my life.

  “Mother, she’s a good woman, talented and sweet. She never mentioned how you were treating her. I had no idea. It hurt me more than you can know to see the first woman I ever loved, who is the example of the type of woman I wanted for a wife, being so critical and hurtful of the woman I love.”

  Tears slipped down Luella’s cheeks. “Pearl never said one word back to me whenever I criticized her. She welcomed me into your home each day, going about her chores while I commented on every little thing she did differently than I do.”

  Repentance was flowing from his mother. “What do you want to do?”

  “I’d like to go and beg Pearl’s forgiveness. I understand that she might not want to, or to allow me to come for visits, but I need to tell her how sorry I am.”

  Will stood and drew his mother into a hug. “I think you’ll find that Pearl is a very forgiving person.”

  “I hope so Will. I never wanted to drive you and her away.”

  “We don’t want to be driven away, either.”

  ~~~~~

  Will and Luella had to wait until Lillian returned from the errands she was running before they could leave the shop. When they arrived at home, Pearl was in the kitchen, elbow deep in the washtub. The lines behind the house were full of clothing and sheets. Pearl’s forehead was shiny with sweat, her expression cautiously welcoming as she dried her hands and smoothed her damp apron.

  “Good morning. May I get you some coffee or raspberry water?”

  “No, thank you,” Luella said.

  Will moved to Pearl. “Come, let’s go into the parlor. It’s a little steamy in here.”

  Pearl searched his eyes as she untied her apron and lifted a hand to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “Okay.”

  Pearl sat on the edge of the settee and Will slid in beside her. Luella took the sewing chair across the coffee table from them and cleared her throat.

  “Pearl, I want to tell you how sorry I am about how I’ve been treating you. I was wrong and should never have criticized you for doing things differently than I do. You’re an accomplished homemaker. I know that, and knew it even as I was making my comments. I was jealous of you becoming such an important person in Will’s life. I hope you can forgive me.”

  “Of course, I forgive you.”

  Will could see an uncertain hope come into his mother’s eyes.

  “Pearl, could we start over? I’ve let my jealousy damage the friendship we were developing. I hope it’s not too late to become friends. I’ll mind my tongue and help any way I can.” Luella grinned. “I may not always succeed. I want you to let me know when I cross the line.”

  Pearl reached across the space between them. Luella clasped her hand. “I’d love to forget the difficulties and renew our friendship.”

  Will saw the affection they had for each other peek out from where it had been hiding in both of the women he loved so much.

  “Is there anything I can do to help you prepare for the baby? I think I’m a pretty good grandmother, and I want to be for your child, too.” Luella squeezed Pearl’s hand a couple of times.

  Pearl surprised both Will and Luella when she burst into tears. Will gathered his wife into his arms comforting her, looking to his mother for help. Luella came over and patted Pearl on the back for comfort.

  When she’d calmed, Pearl took a shuddery
breath and said, “I’ve been praying we could have a better relationship. I’m so afraid of giving birth. I’ve felt so alone, without any family. Lillian isn’t able to help with this. I so wanted you to be willing to help. I’m afraid I’ll be a terrible mother. I don’t know enough about what babies need.”

  Luella pushed Will away and sat beside Pearl. She hugged her then took Pearl’s face between her hands, looking into her eyes. “You’ll be a wonderful mother. And, babies only need three things: Love, food and to be warm and dry. But mostly they need love. You have that in abundance. And if you need some help in that department, just call me and I’ll be there to give that little one more love than he can hold.”

  ~~~~~

  Pearl bit her lip as she rolled out the dough for Mother Lee’s Rolls. The pumpkin and mince meat pies were in the oven baking. She would form the rolls and let them rise. They’d be baked just before she and Will left to go to his parents’ house for Thanksgiving.

  For the past two months Pearl had been cautiously allowing her relationship with Luella to grow. She’d been wary at first that her mother-in-law would again begin to treat her with disrespect. The caring, giving woman whom Pearl had met in late April, who had been replaced by the critical one of the summer and early fall was back, much to Pearl’s delight.

  Being alone in a new city, having her husband die, then finding the generous Miller family had done much to soothe the grieving young woman. When Luella’s attitude had changed it had brought more sadness to an already discouraged Pearl.

  She’d known Luella wouldn’t welcome Pearl and Will’s marriage. The vehemence with which Luella had expressed her objection had surprised and distressed Pearl. She’d reacted in the only way she thought might soothe Luella. She’d simply accepted the criticism and done the best she could, keeping silent about it all to Will. The last thing she’d wanted was to become more of an obstacle between him and his parents.

  With the friendship between Luella and Pearl growing, her focus shifted to her feelings toward Will. He was so very loving toward her, taking care of her even more tenderly as her pregnancy progressed.

  He’d insisted she see a doctor to make sure everything was normal and she was healthy. Pearl had objected to having Vernon Strasser as her physician. He was a friend and the possibility of him attending the baby’s birth simply didn’t bring comfort to the expectant mother. Vernon had understood and recommended a colleague whom Pearl accepted. She hoped to give birth at home, but in the event of complications she was comfortable with this man’s skills.

  Will had surprised her in late October when he came home driving a red Model T automobile. He’d purchased the 1909 model from Mr. Norbury who was purchasing a new 1911 Maxwell. Now, he’d come home daily for lunch and take her back to the shop for the afternoon. Not having to ride the trolley was wonderful, but Pearl wondered how well the automobile would run in the winter.

  Pearl dipped the last roll in melted butter and folded the circle over laying it in the pan. She covered all the pans with a clean dish towel, noting the time so she would know when to bake them after they’d risen. The pies were done so she removed them from the oven and placed them on racks on the table to cool. Removing her apron, Pearl left the kitchen. She needed to talk with Will and now was as good a time as any.

  Will was seated at the desk in the corner of the parlor. He spent many of his hours at home designing jewelry. The commission pieces for Mr. Norbury had brought many new customers into the shop who wanted one-of-a-kind items for their wives or themselves. The money these wealthy people were willing to spend astounded Pearl. She’d had several commissions for lacework also. She wasn’t taking new orders for complicated pieces as she knew her time would be more limited once the baby was born.

  Smiling at the jewelry periodicals scattered on the coffee table and floor, Pearl picked them up, stacking them together on the table. Will and Lillian shared a trait. They weren’t overly concerned with keeping their home neat. Pearl didn’t mind. Will was so caring, she’d pick up after him as much as was needed.

  Walking up behind him, Pearl slipped her hands over his shoulders and down his chest, leaning against him as close as her belly would permit. “What are you working on?”

  Will straightened and lifted a hand to place it over hers. “It’s a choker necklace of platinum, diamonds and pearls. This will be the style of the earrings too.” He pointed to the drops of pearls suspended from the diamond encrusted chain.

  “Lovely.”

  “Would you like something like this for yourself?”

  “No. I’d rather you spend your time making them to sell. I…”

  Just then the baby kicked straight out, bumping against the back of Will’s head. He jerked around, his eyes wide with wonder.

  “Wow! That was some kick. Do you need to sit down?” Will stood and led her to the settee.

  Pearl smiled. “No, I’m fine, but I will sit with you.” She patted the space beside her. Now that it was time, she found she was nervous and tongue-tied. She could feel her cheeks heating and looked down at their clasped hands.

  “Pearl, is everything all right? You seem distressed or worried.” Will squeezed her hand causing her to look at his face.

  She studied him, seeing his silvery blue eyes filled with concern. His blonde hair was mussed from his fingers running through it as he worked out a design. She knew he thought his nose was too big, and maybe it was, but she thought it gave his face character.

  Pearl laid her hand on his cheek. “Everything is wonderful. I know you’ve been worried because I’ve been quiet lately. I’ve been trying to figure out how to tell you. What words to use.”

  The anxiety in his eyes grew. This was what she’d wanted to avoid, yet she’d caused it with her dithering.

  “Will, don’t fret. I just wanted everything to be perfect. I wanted to do something special for you, but haven’t been able to think of a way that would mean something to you. I decided today was the day.

  “You’ve been so very good to me from the moment we met. I was at my lowest, not knowing if I would survive through the week until I was paid. You came to my rescue.” She waved away his protest when he started to object. “Yes, I know Lillian and your mother were involved. You, though, stood out to me with your support. You befriended me. Allowed Lillian to kick you out of the apartment so I could move in.” They both smiled at the memory of her machinations in getting him to buy the house.

  “You made such a great sacrifice for me when you found out I was expecting and asked me to marry you. Don’t say you didn’t.” She held up her hand to stop him from speaking.

  “You’ve honored the Biblical verses about marriage in so many ways. Through it all you’ve honored my mourning for Patrick.

  “I went to his grave the other day. I needed to tell him about you. Needed to tell him I and his baby are going to be okay. That I’ve found a wonderful man to raise it. To be the father he never had the chance to be. To let him know we have found a family here who will love us.

  “I also needed to tell him I’ve found someone. Someone I love with all my heart the way I loved him. Because, Will, I do love you. I…”

  The rest of the words were swallowed in Will’s kiss. Or rather kisses.

  “I’ve longed for you to say those words,” Will said when they finally came up for air. “I’ve loved you for so long. I think ever since you fainted in my shop.” He kissed her again.

  “I love you. It’s taken me longer to realize it. I can’t say when it began or even when I finally knew. I just did. You became the most important person in my life. The one I want to be with. The one whom God gave me to love and cherish. My Will.” She kissed him softly.

  “I like that; being yours. I’ll be Pearl’s Will for as long as I live.” His kiss was filled with desire. He glanced at the clock. “I think we have time to celebrate before we go to Mother’s, don’t you?” He stood and pulled Pearl to her feet and led the way to the bedroom.

  ~~~~~
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  “Come on, Will. Hurry, we are late enough. Hand me the basket. You take the pie carrier.” Pearl stood by the automobile, bouncing slightly on her toes. She glanced at the house as Will did as instructed.

  “Relax, they won’t start eating without us.”

  “I know, but I don’t like being late, especially for the reason we are. What if they ask why? What do we tell them?”

  He grinned at her as they hurried up the walk. “The truth?”

  “Heaven’s no, Will. How embarrassing.”

  “We can blame your condition. You needed to lie down for a while this morning, and that I made you stay in bed longer than I should have.”

  “Will, really,” Pearl objected.

  “That we needed to celebrate your love for me?” Will’s eyes sparkled with love and mischief.

  “You are not helping.” Pearl tried to suppress her grin but failed.

  Several nieces and nephews met them at the door, excited to see them.

  “Grandma’s been wondering where you were. Grandpa said it’s to be expected of newlyweds but wouldn’t explain what he meant by that.” Mary’s eldest daughter said as she held the door open so they could enter the house.

  “We’re hungry,” Josey’s four-year-old son said. Several other heads nodded.

  Pearl shot an exasperated look at Will. “We’re sorry. I’m sure you are. I’ve made plenty of rolls. Here, this will tide you over.” She flipped the towel covering the basket back and handed a roll to each child. They all grinned their thanks and ran off to let the others see their bounty and know that Uncle Will and Aunt Pearl were finally here.