by Trumbo, Kari
“I’ll get the lights down here and lock up when I go.” It would be a bad idea to hang around the church alone with Isla and no one else in the building. Pastor Paul slid the locking barrier up between the sanctuary wing and the HUB.
“We’d better shut off the lights and get everything locked,” Duncan said.
Isla backed her chair up so he could get around easier and waited for him to shut off all the lights. She pushed her way to the main door and waited as he locked the offices and the side door.
He opened the door and waited for her to push herself out then turned and locked it.
“Duncan, do you think I have any chance of making it? If I don’t get first place at the next qualifier…”
She hadn’t thought about much else in so long. While her drive to succeed was another beautiful part to who she was, it superseded everything else. She would never be able to have a meaningful relationship while that drive was there. It took up too much of her.
“I don’t know. I don’t have the points sheets with me.” But he knew without looking that it would take a miracle for her to get in this year. A few people who had done very well would have to place at the bottom or drop out completely and Isla would have to get first. It was a long-shot.
“I feel like I should be practicing every day. What if I get soft by taking so many days off? Are you sure this is the right strategy?”
He walked alongside her to his car and took a minute to consider his answer. He unlocked his car door and opened it. Before she could do her normal shift from seat to car, he scooped her up, enjoying the feel of her, the weight of her, her scent, and the tickle of her hair against his face. “I always have your best interests at heart, Isla. I hope you know that by now.” He wanted to gently place her in his car and kiss her lips before he folded her chair and put it in the back seat, just as a husband would do for a dear wife. But Isla wasn’t his wife, and might never be.
He leaned in and placed her in his car, backing out to give her space immediately. She was so used to his help that she didn’t even bat an eye. He folded up her chair and slid it in the back seat then went around and climbed in on the driver’s side. He’d always enjoyed ferrying Isla where she needed to go. His job was such that he was usually available. She’d been so excited when she got her special van for people who couldn’t use the pedals in a normal car, but he’d been secretly sad, as now she didn’t ask for his help much anymore.
“Duncan?” Isla spoke up as he pulled to a stop in front of her apartment. “Why don’t you date?”
He put the car in park and sat for a second. There had been other girls who’d asked him out, but none of them lasted. He just wasn’t all that interested. “I don’t know. Who’d want to go out with me?” He laughed, hoping she’d just change the subject.
“I think you’re a great guy. But you spend so much time with me. I guess, when I retire next year, you’ll be able to finally find someone.” He didn’t miss the way her voice pitched higher and went full squeak by the end. Was he just putting too much into her words, or did she have the same hopes as he did?
“Like I said. I’m no great catch. I work with kids…I’m basically one big kid myself. I don’t think women would find me all that appealing.” He opened his door and slid out before she could say more. As soon as he had her chair opened and locked, he opened her door and she held out her hand to stop him.
“I can do it, just move the chair up next to the car.”
He didn’t want to, but he did as she asked and within seconds, she gripped the chair and turned herself sideways so she could balance her weight with both arms and slide herself back into the chair. Then she unlocked the brake and backed the chair up to the sidewalk so he could close the door and lock it.
He turned to her and shoved his hands in his pockets, wishing he were smart or gallant or anything but the plain old Duncan he was.
“Thank you for driving me home,” she said. “You don’t have to walk me in.”
“Your mom would probably appreciate it if I did.” So would he, but again, if she didn’t want it, he wouldn’t push. Not now, when so many things had to go right in the next few weeks.
“Well, then come on in and check on your flowers.” She smiled and got her chair moving toward the front door.
He followed her steady pace and held the door open after she unlocked it, then did the same with her apartment door. Her home always smelled of pumpkin spice. She burned scented candles so her place smelled like fall all year long. He breathed deeply of the scent that he’d always associated with this special woman.
“Did you stock up while your candles were in season?” he asked.
She laughed and opened a lower cupboard in her kitchen, revealing twelve, three-wick candles in glass jars. “Of course. I waited until about a week ago when they were on clearance.”
Feeling her tension, nerves, worry―whatever it was that kept her from looking him in the eye while fidgeting with her mittens in her lap―he lowered himself to eye-level to get her full attention. “I need you to trust me. You’ve always let me be your coach, listened to me on the track, but now I need you to trust me as a friend. One who’s worried about you. You go from this apartment to the track, order your groceries online, you never even go to the movies. I get it, you’re driven to win. That’s noble, commendable, people look up to you. But if you don’t look around, just a little, the world will be a pretty big shock to you when you retire. Can you trust me?”
Can you love me?
The words wouldn’t cross his lips, but he wished they would.
He gave in and reached for her hands, loving how they were hard and callused in places, and soft as silk in others. She didn’t pull them from him, instead she stared down at them.
“I want to trust you. I know you wouldn’t put me in a position to get hurt, not intentionally. Do you remember our senior year, when you were friends with Camden?”
It had been a short friendship, as Camden had left for college right after high school. “Yeah, of course.”
“He tried to convince me once that the only reason I had any friends at all, was because people felt sorry for me.”
Duncan stood and started pacing the room. What could he do about a situation that had happened years ago, and one he had no control over?
Isla continued, “I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to prove him right. If you had chosen me over him, I would’ve always wondered if you’d done it because you felt sorry for me.”
He turned to face her and her eyes glistened. “Isla, pity will only last so long. Friendship, true friendship, based in trust and even more, lasts forever.”
6
Spin, spin, spin, turn the compensator… Isla couldn’t think much beyond the basic rhythm of the practice. She certainly couldn’t let herself focus on Duncan’s words. They’d already kept her up through the whole night. She’d had to work extra hard at her computer that day to make sure she got everything right, because his one phrase kept sounding through her mind, playing havoc with every rational thing she should be doing.
True friendship, based in trust and even more, lasts forever.
It reminded her of a verse she’d learned in Sunday School when she was younger, but it wouldn’t come back to her. How could she ever doubt Duncan? Hadn’t he chosen to stay her friend when no one else had? Though, it could as easily have been because she pushed everyone else away. The few girl friends she’d had were superficial, especially once they reached the age to wear makeup, play volleyball, and try to attract boyfriends.
Who would ever want to kiss you? They’d have to practically sit in your lap. The head cheerleader’s voice came through her mind to obliterate Duncan’s. Though she’d had a crush on Duncan since the seventh grade, he’d never even tried to kiss her so she could prove them all wrong. No date had been forthcoming. No one had taken her to prom. That was why she’d put that silly request on her list. She could be kissed, she could dance―she deserved love as much a
s anyone else, didn’t she?
Duncan’s yell broke through her memories. “You’re losing speed in turn four, get on the compensator a little quicker and push right through on the next run.”
The track was no place to daydream. Now that she only had three days a week to be there, she had to make the most of every minute. She consciously pulled her head back into the game and pushed harder through all four turns, stopping in front of Duncan past the finish line and almost into turn one.
“Good, that was much better.” He glanced at his watch and she laughed to herself. He was the only man their age she knew of who still wore one. “Should we call it a day?”
Isla couldn’t tell what time it was inside the practice stadium, but her muscles quivered with the workout. “I need a stretch at least, then I might be good for another run.” Now that her practices had been cut in half, she didn’t want to leave a minute early.
“I think you should stretch, and we’ll call it a day. You’ve been at it for a few hours and you’re looking great. Your time on the last lap was good. If you can do that in a race, and stay focused, you’ll make it.”
If only she could believe him. He’d said that before. But maybe he was right. Maybe she tried harder in practice than in competition. That was something she could work on.
Duncan wheeled her chair over and unbelted the buckle holding her legs in place in the chair. He lifted her out and her muscles screamed in protest, but she refused to gasp or make any noise. He set her down in her chair and rubbed circulation back into her legs as she stretched her arms so they wouldn’t get stiff and sore.
“Why can’t we press on a little more today?”
He glanced up a her and a moment of hurt melted over his blue eyes. “Don’t you remember? We’re driving all the way to Burnsville to go to Buca di Beppo with your parents.”
How had she forgotten? Isla groaned. “I’m sorry, Duncan. I totally forgot. I didn’t bring anything nice and I’m going to need a shower before I do anything.” Now she wished she wore a watch so she knew how much time they had.
“We’ve got two hours. It will take about twenty-five minutes to get to Burnsville, but if we go straight to your apartment, you can get cleaned up and changed, and we can meet your parents there.”
“You’re going to wait at my apartment while I get ready?” She’d be behind closed doors, but it still felt very intimate.
“I can wait outside if it bugs you.”
She shook her head and backed the chair away from him. “It doesn’t bug me, it’s just different is all.”
“Then let’s get you to your apartment and we can deal with that then. The clock’s ticking.”
* * *
Duncan pulled the car up in front of Isla’s apartment. It was almost like a second home to him, he’d been there so often. When she’d taken sick a year before, right before Christmas, he’d spent days there, rubbing her legs to keep up circulation, making sure she ate, carrying her to the bathroom. Her parents were both young and still working, so they couldn’t be there, but his job was flexible. It was then he’d realized just how much he loved Isla. He’d prayed over her, worried over her, and rejoiced when the flu had finally left her body.
“Well”―she glanced at him quickly, then her apartment―“here we are.”
He laughed at her sudden nervousness. “Let’s get you inside. I’ve got a few things I need to do while you clean up. So, don’t worry about me.”
She raised a pretty, dark eyebrow. “And just what’s that?”
He had a plan and he wasn’t telling, but he had to get her winter gear ready while she was distracted. “Just never mind. We have to hurry. I don’t want to leave your parents waiting for us. They might lose their high opinion of me.”
He got out of the car and came around to her side. She couldn’t easily reach her chair from the passenger seat like she could in her van. If he ever got to the point where he asked her to marry him, he’d make sure that didn’t bother her. At least she had her van and wouldn’t need to rely on him to get her places. He lifted her chair from the back seat and locked the wheels then opened her door, positioning the chair where she could reach it if she’d rather move herself. She’d worked herself hard at practice and when she didn’t immediately make a move to shift herself out of the car, he lifted her.
“You look a little tuckered. Want me to push you in?”
A brief hint of fire lit her eyes, then cooled. “As long as I don’t lose my independent woman card…yes.”
He wanted to kiss her, reassure her that she’d never be any less to him. “I won’t say a word to anyone. Your secret is safe with me.” He flipped the brake on both sides of the chair and pushed her up to the apartment.
“It won’t take me too long,” she told him, once they were inside. “I don’t have the energy to take a full shower. I’ll just grab my clothes and clean up in the bathroom.”
“Sounds good. I’ll be in and out, so don’t be alarmed if you hear your door opening a few times.” He had to move her winter gear to his car while she got ready.
“What have you got up your sleeve?” She angled her head to the side.
“Nothing.” He laughed a little at her sweet inquisitiveness. It was so close to a real date and he’d been looking forward to this day for years. “Fine, your mom asked that I bring an extra set of clothes for you so you could spend the night at their house. She has the day off and wants to go shopping with you tomorrow.”
“Oh.” Her lips flattened and disappointment laced the word. “I hoped, since I won’t be practicing, that we would be doing something from my list tomorrow.”
“Ha!” He couldn’t help a little excitement. “I’ve finally got you excited about something other than racing.” And just maybe, she was happy to be doing something with him.
“Don’t pat yourself on the back too quickly, Duncan.”
He waited for her to expand on her thought, but she didn’t, she just gave him the eye and rolled her chair back to her room to get her clothes. He would have to wait until she locked herself in the bathroom before he could take her key and collect her coat, boots, hat, mittens, and anything else he could think of. Sledding with Isla wouldn’t be easy, but the lady he’d spoken to at Buck Hill had assured him they could make this particular bucket list item happen; they’d just have to break a few rules to do it.
Isla watched him closely as she emerged from her room and pushed her way to the bathroom. “Don’t go digging through my drawers. I left an outfit on the bed and my bag is there too.”
Perfect. She wouldn’t see what he was really packing for her. “Thanks.” He gave her a big smile that he knew would have her wondering what he was up to the whole time she prepared to go. Some secrets were glorious.
7
She’d never had an excuse to visit Buca di Beppo before. The only reason she’d even heard about it was a billboard on 169 she’d noted while on her way to Shakopee to visit friends. Burnsville wasn’t a suburb she frequented and everything around it was unfamiliar. It was after rush hour, but County Road 13 was still packed with cars. Duncan sat, completely relaxed, next to her and kept trying to draw her into conversation. Though she’d lived in the suburbs her whole life, she still hated multilane traffic, especially when she used her van with its special acceleration and brake buttons.
“So, this place is great. I think you’ll really like it,” Duncan assured her. “The potatoes come with slivered garlic and I’ve never had better pasta in my life.”
Mama had made pasta dishes occasionally as she’d grown up. You weren’t quite Minnesotan if you didn’t eat the occasional casserole, and Mama’s friends in the PTA had been more than willing to share recipes. But Isla always found them to be rather bland, even though her friends all raved about them. She preferred more vibrant, flavorful dishes.
“I’m sure I’ll find something I like.”
“It’s served family style, so we’ll pick maybe three things, and you can try them all.�
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Everything in life was new at some point. She had to embrace new things. This was Italian, not Scandinavian. If they had slivered garlic in their potatoes, there was hope. “I’m sure I’ll manage to find something. How is the seating? Will there be room for my chair to maneuver?” That was always a worry whenever she went someplace new. She learned the hard way when she’d visited a local dinner theater and the rows were very tight. Friends had purchased the tickets as a gift and hadn’t mentioned to the box office her need for special seating. They managed to accommodate her, but only because another patron generously switched tables. Now, she usually called ahead. Hopefully, Duncan had done the same.
“Yes, they have a few tables that will fit your chair and I reserved one of them.” He glanced quickly at her and flashed his brilliant smile.
Would he pass down that smile to his children?
Isla gasped at her own thought. She’d never taken the time to think about her own fertility, or children. Though she’d been paralyzed since birth, she’d had normal cycles since puberty, so it was still possible. Isla glanced at him, praying this wasn’t one of those times he could read her thoughts.
“Thank you. It isn’t something everyone thinks about.”
He chuckled, but kept his eyes on traffic. “I make it a point to think about you.”
A matching nervous chuckle burst from her before she could pull it back.
“What?” He laughed. “I have to think of training schedules, ways to encourage you…”
She’d known him so long, she could practically feel his sarcasm, but why? Why would he say something like that? “Well, I find myself thinking of you, too. Especially ways to annoy you.”
He pulled off the road onto an exit. “You’ll have to try harder.”
“I don’t annoy you?” Their easy back and forth gave her something to think about other than facing a restaurant she’d never been to. Her nerves cooled, and she watched his every move.