Holding on to Us

by A. E. Neal

  "Missus Kennedy?" he asked in a thick Latin accent.

  "Just Kennedy, por favor."

  "Ken-e-dee," he repeated and I nodded.

  He took my bag and led me to a van parked at the curb just outside the terminal. I climbed inside and basked in the cool air conditioning as we waited for the other passengers.

  I pulled my phone out and sent Deacon a quick text letting him know I was safe and I'd be home in a few days. There wasn't much for cell service, so I hoped the message went through.

  "Quieres una cerveza, señorita?" the driver asked as he opened the lid to a cooler between the front seats.

  "Si, gracias," I said and took it from him. It was cold and delicious. I couldn't wait to get my ass to the beach where I could just lay out and do nothing for five whole days.

  "Contamos con más pasajeros," the driver said, but I had no idea what he'd said. My Spanish was more than just a little rusty, it was bad. I just nodded and leaned back against the seat as I waited.

  After a few minutes, a young couple climbed into the van, who were newlyweds from Wisconsin, and were then followed by a rowdy group of college-aged kids who were singing at the top of their lungs. I shifted my weight and turned to look out the window.

  Once everyone was loaded into the van, the driver shut the doors and we began moving.

  "Skittles?" Shit, I knew that voice. My stomach sank as I turned to face him.

  "Zac? Wait, what? Why are you here?" I stammered.

  "I should ask the same of you," he said and I could smell tequila on his breath.

  He propped his elbows on the back of the seat and leaned over my shoulder. His breath hit my neck and it sent shivers across my skin.

  "Seriously, what're you doing here?" I asked as I caught a glimpse of Alex, fondling a brunette girl with huge boobs in the back seat. "And Alex?"

  Zac leaned back for a moment and tapped the tiny blonde on the shoulder. My heart sank, no, it plummeted into the floor of the van with a loud thump as soon as she turned around to face me.

  "Kirsten," I said and I could feel the bile rise in my throat.

  "Oh. My. God. No way! Kenna, right?"

  "Kennedy," I corrected her, but her arms were flailing as she wrapped them around my neck and screeched.

  "Guys! Guys! This is Zac's ex-girlfriend!" she shouted to her friends in the back of the van and I wanted to vomit.

  I shot Zac an accusatory glance, but when he shrugged and took another sip of his beer, I figured it wasn't a good time to correct her.

  The other girls threw me quick waves and even Alex looked happy to see me. Either that, or he was so drunk that he didn't have a clue where he was. "Hi, Alexander," I offered and the girl attached to his lips squeaked. "Alexander? That's your official name? Oh. Em. Gee, that's so hot."

  Zac rested his arms across the back of the chair again as the others carried on their conversation about some booze cruise they had made reservations for.

  "So, do I even need to ask?" he asked, wiping the beads of sweat from his brow with the hem of his t-shirt.

  "Ask what? Why I'm here?" He looked amused, and all of a sudden it hit me. "Wait...you don't think I'm here because of you, do you?"

  He smiled his perfectly crooked smile and rested his forehead against his arms.

  "You're kidding, right? Had I actually known you'd be here, there's no way in hell I'd have come," I spat, but he didn't seem to care.

  "Whatever, Skittles. It's good to see you, and I'm glad you're here," he said softly, squeezing my shoulder before leaning back into his seat and wrapping his arm around Kirsten.

  I turned and leaned in between the driver and his assistant, shaking my empty beer bottle. "Uno mas, por favor."

  Zac

  Even through my drunken stupor, I could see her. She was actually there. Sitting in the seat in front of me. My Kennedy. God, how I missed her scent, her smile and her perfectly plump lips. I couldn't believe it and the best thing about it, Kirsten didn't even seem to care. She yammered on with her friends about some class they were gonna take and I just stared at the back of Kennedy's beautiful head.

  I was sure Ally had told her we were going to Cancun, but she looked truly shocked when she realized I was in the same van with her. It was going to be the best week, ever. I tipped the bottle back against my lips and swallowed the remainder of my beer.

  Kennedy

  After a short drive from the airport, we'd dropped off the newlyweds at a beach front resort, and were back on the road again. I prayed inwardly that Zac and his new friends weren't staying at the same hotel I was. As we passed a few more hotels, the driver announced our last stop and that's when reality set in. Hard Rock Hotel.

  Yep, it was like a scene out of the Twilight Zone. Cue the creepy music.

  As the van came to a stop, we all piled out of the van as the driver unloaded our luggage.

  "So this is really happening? You're just gonna let this happen?" I asked myself, thinking no one could actually hear me.

  "Pretty stoked, K. Aren't you?" Alex chimed in as he threw a sweaty arm around my waist and pulled me into him.

  I turned and shoved both hands against his chest. "Don't touch me."

  He put his hands in front of him and backed away slowly as if I were a rabid animal. "Jeez, someone's raggin'."

  That coming from the guy who would sleep with anything that walked. I took his insult with a grain of salt. "Asshole," I muttered under my breath.

  I followed the loud group inside the hotel lobby and waited as they checked in. The girls giggled when a young shirtless guy handed out fruity drinks in tall collectors glasses with foot long straws. Typical.

  "Guess I'll see you around, Ken," Zac said as he hauled his new trophy-girlfriend down the brightly lit corridor.

  "Whatever," I said.

  After getting my room key, I realized I hadn't eaten much, so I wandered around the resort grounds until I found a taco shop. It had been several years since I'd had a real handmade street taco.

  Tiny bits of heaven were nestled messily on soft corn tortillas and my mouth watered. I devoured six, grabbed a beer from the bar and went back to my room.

  Since there was no need for any lavish upgrades, I decided on a deluxe room with a bed, shower and a nice view of the signature Hard Rock pool. But it also made me think about where Zac and his groupies were staying. I tried to shake the thought of him from my mind as I pulled on my bikini. I was in need of some serious relaxation time, so I grabbed my iPod and headed down to the pool.

  Private cabanas lined the pool deck and I took up residency between two of them to give me a little bit of shade, since I didn't want to burn on my first day. I sprayed myself with sunscreen, slid my sunglasses on and laid back against the cushioned chaise lounge.

  Chapter 20

  Zac

  "We're going down to the beach. Are you comin', baby?" Kirsten asked and I groaned.

  My head throbbed as I finished the remained of my beer. I held out the empty bottle and she took it from me. I pulled my sunglasses down and closed my eyes as I rested my head against the lounge chair on our balcony.

  "I'll be down in a little while," I slurred. "Go have fun with your friends."

  She mumbled something, but I passed out before I could make out what she'd said.

  When I opened my eyes, the sun had already set. The room was quiet and I figured the rest of my group was still at the beach. Thankfully, my head had stopped pounding and my stomach rumbled, reminding me I hadn't eaten all day.

  After a long shower, I got dressed and headed down to the lobby in search for food.

  Kennedy

  After an hour poolside in the blazing sun, I headed back to my room to grab a quick shower before dinner. I tucked my iPod in my bag and took the last sip of a very melted pina colada. The hotel seemed quieter than when I'd first arrived, but as the sun set in the distance, the ambiance shifted rather quickly. Multicolored lights decorated the various palm trees around the pool and a DJ began p
laying upbeat Latin dance music.

  I rounded the corner opposite my room and something caused me to look up. Walking as if he were on a mission, was Zac, and he was headed in my direction. I sped up, hoping to make it to my room before he noticed me, but it was too late.

  "Skittles, wait up!" he shouted and jogged toward me.

  I stopped and fumbled with my room key. He was close enough that I could smell his body wash and it made my heart beat faster.

  I glanced up at him and he smiled. "So you're really here?" he asked.

  "Yeah. I guess, I am," I said, dropping my gaze to the floor.

  "What're doing, right now?"

  "Well...I was gonna take a shower and grab some dinner, but I'm exhausted. I think I might just order in," I lied.

  Why was talking to him awkward, all of a sudden? It could have been because he was on vacation with that blonde tramp, or it could be that I never imagined in a million years that I'd run into him in Mexico. I really did have the worst luck.

  "I was just headed to dinner. I'll wait, if you wanna join me."

  Where'd this Zac come from? Usually, he'd tell me to fend for myself or beg me to buy him dinner, but this Zac, he was different.

  I wasn't sure if he was still drunk or just being nice, but I actually welcomed the change for once. "That's nice of you, but really, I think I'm just gonna stay in tonight," I said.

  "Okay," he began as he took a few step backwards, "but if you change your mind, I'll be waiting."

  My heartbeat sped up and I nodded. "Thanks."

  I jammed the key card into the slot and swung the door open once the indicator turned green. I dropped my bag on the floor and closed the door behind me, leaning against it as it clicked shut.

  "What the hell was that?" I asked myself. I must've been more exhausted than I thought, either that, or I was hallucinating because I'd know Zac since I was thirteen. Not once had he ever come across like such a...well, gentleman.

  I needed to clear my head, so I stripped down and stepped into the steam-filled glass shower. The hot water instantly melted the tension in my shoulders and I was finally able to relax.

  This was my vacation time and there was nothing that could ruin it, not Zac, not Kirsten, not anyone or anything.

  Zac

  I reached the lobby and the nightlife had already begun. Loud music filled the thick, humid air and right away, I heard Kirsten's high-pitched voice from the pool's swim up bar.

  If there was any chance I could make things right between Kennedy and I, I had to let Kirsten down nice and easy. Which I knew wouldn't be a painless task, because lets face it, she did bring me to Mexico and paid for everything.

  I ran a hand through my still damp hair and made my way toward Kirsten and her friends.

  "Babe! You're here!" she screeched and it caused the hair on my neck to stand on end.

  I waved, she smiled and pulled herself over the edge of the pool. She was wearing a light blue bikini that left little to the imagination. Her boobs bounced as she bounded toward me, carrying a drink adorned with various kinds of tropical fruit. A few strands of colorful beads swayed between her breasts and I knew exactly how she'd gotten them.

  I put my hand up to stop her, but she crashed into me, pressing herself against my chest, giggling.

  "Shit, Kir. I'm all wet, now," I scolded, but she wrapped her arms tightly around my neck, causing some of her frozen drink to spill down the back of my shirt.

  "Me, too," she cooed and she gazed up at me with glossy blue eyes.

  "How many of those have you had?" I asked, but it wasn't like I cared.

  "I dunno," she slurred, "maybe four or five...or ten." She threw her head back and laughed. Yep, she was shit-faced.

  "You hungry? Maybe you should eat something."

  "Naw, baby...can we juss go up-tares?"

  I took her by the arm and pulled her forward. She lost her balance and before she fell face first into the concrete pool deck, I lifted her into my arms. Her head lolled against my shoulder and her eyes closed. "Olive you, babe."

  Although she'd slurred the words, I knew what she'd intended to say and bile rose in my throat.

  Once we were in the elevator, her eyes fluttered open for a moment and she smiled. "Takin' care me," she mumbled.

  "Yeah, I've got you."

  "Forever?" she asked.

  She was drunk and I doubted she'd remember anything, so I simply said, "Yeah."

  She closed her eyes again and her mouth parted slightly. Kirsten really was one of the most beautiful girls I'd ever seen. If it hadn't been for her constant need for attention and her annoying screech, I'd probably really care about her, maybe even love her. But as it stood, there was nothing on this earth that could make me want to even try to get to that point with her.

  I fiddled with the room key in my back pocket. I couldn't get it out, and I couldn't set Kirsten down because she was out cold.

  "Shit." The card slipped from my pocket, through my fingers and fell to the ground.

  "Damn it," I said as I carried the ninety pound girl in my arms. "Kirsten, sweetheart, wake up." I desperately tried to wake her, but she didn't budge.

  "Need a hand?" the familiar female voice asked from behind me.

  I turned to face her. She looked stunning, more beautiful than I ever remembered seeing her and my breath caught as she smiled.

  "Looks like you've got your arms full tonight," she joked as she bent over and picked up the room key.

  She slid it in the slot and held the door open for me. "Thanks."

  I carried Kirsten into the suite's bedroom and lay her carefully on the bed. She was still in her bikini, beads around her neck and drink in her hand.

  "This is one of those moments when I really wished I had a Sharpie," Kennedy said from the doorway and I laughed.

  "Do I just leave her like this?" I asked.

  Kennedy sauntered into the room, swaying her hips back and forth as she did so and leaned over Kirsten. "I see why you like her. She's very pretty." She pulled the comforter from the opposite edge of the bed and lifted it over Kirsten's tanned body. I took the drink from her hand and set it on the night stand.

  "She's gonna have one hell of a hangover, if she's been drinking those all day," she laughed.

  I grabbed a bottle of water from the mini fridge and set it next to her as Kennedy pulled the trash can next to the bed. "Just in case she pukes," she added.

  "Thanks."

  It was unusually tense between us and I didn't know if it was because of Kirsten, or because I still couldn't get over the fact that she was standing in my hotel room in Mexico.

  Once Kirsten was taken care of, I changed my soaking wet t-shirt and opted for a collared polo, instead.

  "Nice room," Kennedy called. "Way bigger than mine."

  I rounded the corner and caught her gazing out over the ocean on the balcony. Her dress clung to her in all the right places, exposing her perfect porcelain skin in the moonlight.

  "Can I get you a drink?" I asked.

  She turned to face me, clutching a tiny bag in her hand. "No, thanks. I think I'll just go."

  She took a few steps forward, but I reached out and grasped her shoulder just before she reached the door. "Have dinner with me." It was more of a command, rather than a question.

  "I don't think that's a good idea, Zac." Her hands crossed over her chest. She was closing me off...again.

  "It's only dinner. I promise, I'll leave you alone for the rest of your vacation. Please."

  She looked skeptical, but finally uncrossed her arms and said, "Fine, just dinner. Nothing else."

  My heart actually skipped a beat when she agreed. It was going to take a lot of work to gain her trust again, but I knew, seeing her here, there was no way I could let her go this time.

  Chapter 21

  Kennedy

  Just dinner? Yeah, right. If I knew Zac, he already had some kind of ulterior motive cooked up in that head of his.

  We found a restaur
ant overlooking the ocean and as the hostess led us to our table, Zac took my hand in his. At first, I tried to pulled away, but he tightened his grip and I curled my fingers around his. It was a new sensation I'd never felt with him before. It was protective, yet friendly, not sexual in any way and I liked it.

  The moon cast a beautiful glow against the water as tiny waves lapped along the shoreline. It was stunning.

  The hostess handed us our menus as we took our seats on opposite sides of the table set for two. A candle in the center of the table flickered in the calm sea breeze.

  I couldn't take my eyes off the ocean. It was majestic, beautiful and surreal. Like a perfect postcard.

  "You look beautiful tonight," Zac said and I tilted my head toward him.

  His icy blue eyes glinted in the dim light and he smiled.

  "Thanks."

  I had a sudden pang of jealousy over Kirsten's relationship with him. Something in him had changed over the few weeks and he actually looked quite happy. Maybe she really was the best thing to happen to him. I wondered if he loved her and if he did, where would that leave us as friends?

  "What's going on in that head of yours, Skittles?"

  I shrugged. "I don't know. You've changed, since you've been seeing her," I began and swallowed hard. "Do you love her, Zac?" It was an honest question and I prayed inwardly he'd say no, but for what reason?

  Deacon and I were actually doing well and after the piercing incident, I knew he cared about me. So, why was I having a sudden change of heart toward Zac?

  "No," he said and leaned closer to me. He took my hand in his and pressed his lips to my knuckles.

  "No?"

  "No, Kennedy, I don't love her." He ran a hand through his thick hair and a perplexed look crossed his face. "Why do you ask?"

  It was a simple question and I wasn't sure why I'd asked. "Just...I dunno...you look so happy. I've never seen you like this before."

  He chuckled. "Are you happy?"

  Another simple question. Was I really happy? The answer was on the tip of my tongue, but I couldn't seem to form the word.

  "I dunno."

  "If you were, you wouldn't be here," he said and damn it, he was right.