Awakened Desires

by Rissa Blakeley

  Josie rushed to her. “Please, don’t get upset,” Josie begged. Gunther heard Quinn upset, all hell would break loose.

  “How can I not? You have some nerve, Levi!” she screeched.

  Gunther ripped open the bedroom door, causing everyone to look his way. His eyes were cold and full of rage. “Both of you…now!” Josie and Quinn both rushed into the bedroom and he slammed the door again.

  “So he snaps his fingers and they rush to his side?” Eve chuckled a little. “Controlling much?” she mumbled to herself.

  “We are leaving tonight,” I quipped as I slammed the door to the bedroom.

  “We can’t leave at night!”

  “What the fuck does it matter, Quinn?!” I yelled.

  “I guess it doesn’t. And don’t yell at me,” she mumbled. “I didn’t do anything to deserve it. I’m sick of the yelling.” She balled up her fists at her sides.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell. I’m just really frustrated and angry. Start packing.” I pushed past Quinn and ripped the door open, running right into Mitch. I tried to dodge past him, but he kept stepping in front of me. Fucker was pissing me off. “Get the fuck out of my way before I move you myself,” I growled.

  “Just calm down for a second.” Mitch held up his hands in front of his chest, scared of confronting me. He fully knew of what I was capable.

  I jammed my finger into his chest. “Fuck you.”

  “Listen…I’m trying to be on your side, but you are making it very difficult,” Mitch said.

  “What then? What epic brilliance do you have to share?”

  “You don’t have to leave. We will leave. Obviously, we’ve been cooped up far too long together, and we were the ones who barged in on your family.”

  “No. You don’t have a vehicle. I do. You can stay. Besides, I’m sick of this shithole. I’d rather sleep in my truck than spend another night in this fucking place.” I stalked over to the supplies and began sorting out what we would be taking.

  “Well, if you want to go, the very least I can do is help you pack.” Mitch knelt down and began gathering together what I was pulling out. I appreciated his help, even though I wanted to bash his blasted face into the floor.

  “Gunther…” The sound of Levi’s voice infuriated me. I had a bottle of water in my hand and when I threw against the wall, it exploded, spraying water everywhere. It just missed Janny’s head.

  “Levi, don’t.” Mitch stood up. “It’s not worth it. You do remember what he did to me, right?” Levi nodded at Mitch confirming, in my mind, that Mitch feared me. He turned around and quietly walked over to Janny, who was shaken by the minor confrontation.

  Quinn came out with my pack and another bag that held some of our belongings. I grabbed the pack and put it on, just in case someone became nosey. I wouldn’t have put it past them. Then I started stacking our stuff by the door.

  The rest of the group was just standing there, watching me work at a feverish pace. I was in program mode. Quinn and Josie knew to stay out of my way when I was working like that. It was easier for everyone.

  After about a half-hour of sorting and talking with Quinn about what we needed to take with us, I said, “Well, that looks like everything we need.” I stood looking at the pile, then turned to the love of my life. “I just need to do a weapons check and we will get going.” She nodded.

  I began checking all of the weapons we would be taking with us, reloading what I could. Mitch and Eve helped Quinn and Josie pack up the truck.

  While they were still outside organizing the supplies in the truck, Mitch pulled Quinn aside. Josie carefully watched the exchange. “I just want to apologize. What I did was wrong. I deserved everything Gunther did to me. So please, I beg you, accept my apology. You are a great family and I wish I had the same. Take care and I wish you a safe journey.” Mitch smiled.

  Quinn stood in silence for a moment. “Thank you. I wish you well, too.” She turned around and walked away, leaving Mitch standing alone with Quinn’s cold attitude still hanging over him like a dense fog. She felt he was being sincere, but she hadn’t forgotten that he shot Gunther and tried to kill her.

  I walked out and saw Quinn walking away from Mitch. I strode up to her. “Did he try anything? Because right now…”

  She interrupted, “No. It’s fine. He was just apologizing.”

  I cupped Quinn’s face in my hands. My touch and the chill in the air made her shiver. “Are you sure you’re fine?” Quinn nodded. I kissed her on the forehead. “I’ll kill him in honor of my love.” She gasped. I chuckled a little. “I’m sorry I’ve been acting so mental.”

  Quinn smiled. “I don’t expect anything less from you.” Truth. God, I love her. I smirked and wrapped my arm around her to give her a quick hug. Breaking our embrace, I headed for the truck to start organizing things for easy access.

  Gunther left her standing there while he organized what he wanted within reach while he was driving. Quinn watched him work. There wasn’t a single movement that wasn’t pre-determined. It absolutely broke her heart.

  One minute he was the tender, loving man that she knew; the next, he was back to program mode…emotionless, calculated, and mechanical. She didn’t know how much longer she could bear to watch that happen in front of her.

  Quinn put her hands over her mouth, trying to suppress her emotions. The tears began streaming down her cheeks and over her fingers. Josie looked at her, then at Gunther. Hoping he didn’t notice, she quickly walked toward her. “Hey. Come here.” Josie grabbed Quinn’s arm and guided her to the side of the shack and out of sight. “What’s wrong?” Josie waved her hands in front of her face. “Earth to Momma Quinn…talk to me.” She sat down, leaning against the house and trying to stop herself from collapsing into a pool of tears. “I want to help you, but I can’t if you don’t tell me what’s wrong. Do you want to stay? If so, we can probably talk him into staying.”

  Quinn swallowed hard, forcing her sorrow down. “It’s him. I can’t get over it. I can’t get over what they did to him. He is so broken, and I don’t know how to help him.”

  “You can only do what you have been doing, which is so much already.”

  “It’s so hard to watch. He knows he is messed up, but he doesn’t realize how bad. If I ever come across that Roger asshole, you better believe I will not feel bad about pulling the trigger.” Quinn wiped away her tears. “I don’t want him to see me upset. It will just make him hate himself more than he already does. He’s so amazing, Josie. I love him so very much, but my heart bleeds for him.”

  Josie stood up and held out her hand, pulling Quinn up. “I know. It’s horrible, but you are doing everything you can to help him. Look how far he has come just from you loving him.” Josie reached out and wiped Quinn’s face. “Come on. Let’s get out of here.” They stepped around the corner of the shack, almost running into Gunther.

  I looked around, but I didn’t see Quinn or Josie anywhere. The panic I felt rattled me, until I heard their voices. They were talking on the other side of the house.

  Listening to what Quinn was saying about me tore me up. She was right, I was broken and I had no clue how broken I truly was, never having a real life to compare it to. What was normal to me was an epic failure to others. It hurt my heart to hear her speak about me that way.

  But she loved me and wanted to be there for me. I was so thankful for that. It killed me knowing I was torturing her with my behavior. I needed to try and stop the program from coming out of me. I needed to work toward that for her…and myself. She deserved someone who was stable and not so temperamental.

  When I saw Quinn round the corner, one corner of my mouth turned up. No matter the circumstance, she lit up my world. When she saw me, she wiped her eyes. I stepped up to her and cupped her beautiful face in my hands. I didn’t say anything, but gazed into Quinn’s eyes. As I opened my mouth to apologize, she put her finger to my lips. I looked down shyly. She dropped her finger and I kissed her with the tender affection
that she deserved.

  After letting out a quiet groan, I said, “Come on. Let’s get the hell out of here and move forward, shall we?” I wrapped my arm around Quinn’s waist, putting my hand securely in the back pocket of her jeans, making sure to give her fit arse a nice squeeze in the process.

  We opened the front door of the shack and stepped just inside, as if we were just visiting. It wasn’t home, nor did it feel like home. It was a temporary stop in our journey through life. I would always remember the first time Quinn and I confessed and sealed our love in that place, but it was time to move on.

  “We’re taking off,” I said coolly.

  Mitch stepped forward. “Please, don’t leave. We want to make this right between all of us.”

  “Yes.” Levi stepped forward. “I would like to apologize. I should never have said anything about what happened with Reid. I was just feeling…”

  When my body stiffened, Quinn reacted. She stepped in front of me and stopped the already tense situation from escalating. “What has been said, has been said.” Her voice was rich with anger, but calm. “Nothing can be taken back. You can forgive, but you cannot forget. I am relatively sure that he isn’t ready to forgive anyone just yet. What happened to Reid has and will always affect him on a level that none of you could possibly understand. This man hasn’t slept soundly since it happened. You don’t lay next to him at night while he talks during what little sleep he does get, and you don’t see those moments when he sits on the edge of the bed all night long, trying to make everything that is wrong in his head right. He may seem a little barbaric, or a little too overbearing, or even a little too callous. But, I assure you, he is a decent, generous, and loving man. He would never, ever hurt anyone without just cause. Keep that in mind when you try to sleep tonight.”

  I was blown away by her words.

  Quinn grabbed my hand. I smirked, my heart swelling with love and pride after hearing her come to my defense with such grace and beauty. “Come on,” she quipped.

  The three of us walked out the door without a look back. We got into the truck and pulled down to the end of the driveway. Quinn looked over at me with some concern. “Should I have been a little kinder to them?”

  “I think you nailed it, love. Abso-fucking-lutely nailed it.” I smiled and touched her thigh. It felt so good to have someone confidently stand by my side and stand up for me. “You ready?”

  “As ready as I will ever be,” Quinn murmured.

  I turned right out of the driveway and sped off into the night.

  Chapter 36

  -January 2015-

  Quinn, Josie, and I were a short distance into the southern edge of South Carolina. I swore we were never going to get to the port in North Carolina where I was supposed to meet Henry, kill him, and board the ship to take off back to England. Quinn wanted me to make nice with Henry, but I wasn’t going to guarantee anything. That would be determined if and when we found him. But I didn’t have any intention of boarding the ship, and I wasn’t sure where we would go from there.

  There were a few houses along the edge of the woods, a short distance from the road. We couldn’t tell if any of them were occupied, nor was I willing to put my girls at risk by knocking on doors in the middle of the night, looking for walls and a roof to protect us. I decided just to pull the Tahoe over onto the side of the road.

  We were only parked for about a half-hour before Josie had settled down in the back seat, curled up with a pillow and blanket. I was pretty sure Quinn and I had bored Josie to death playing word games.

  “Is she asleep?” I whispered in Quinn’s ear.

  Quinn looked behind her and stared at Josie for a moment. “Yeah, looks like it.” She turned and gazed back at me.

  I wiggled my brows at her and she stifled a giggle. I pulled the key out of the ignition just enough so it wouldn’t chime when I opened the door. I opened and closed it with such finesse, Josie never moved. I walked around to Quinn’s side and opened her door, watching Josie through the back passenger window as Quinn slid out. Again, I closed the door without a sound.

  We felt like two teenagers sneaking out in the night. Taking her hand, I pulled out my Sig. My John Thomas was already twitching in my pants, knowing that I was about to get hot and heavy with the love of my life.

  We walked about twenty feet away from the truck and came up to a large boulder in the tree line. I pressed my body up against Quinn’s, pinning her to the massive rock. “It’s been too long. I’m desperate for you.” I crushed my mouth down on hers, causing her to moan.

  Our tongues tangled in an erotic dance of lust and much more than desire. It was desperate need. We needed to be with one another.

  I pulled her body close to mine, swaying back and forth. Breathless, I pulled away. “I wish I could see you properly,” I murmured as I ran my hand through her thick locks.

  “You know what I look like,” she drawled, running her hands up my sides and bringing them up around my neck, pulling me back down to her mouth. It was my turn to moan. Her lips were exquisite and she tasted delicious.

  I pulled away again. “I love watching you come. You look so fucking sexy when you do. Although, you do look stunning in this moonlight.” She smiled at me and I dragged my thumb across her cheek.

  She was so perfect. Everything a man could desire. I was so bloody lucky to have her.

  “You’re funny.” She reached between us and grabbed onto my hard J.T. My body shuddered as she stroked me through my cargoes. My eyes rolled back, feeling her touch me. It sent sparks up my spine and tingles through my body. I groaned when she unbuttoned and unzipped them. When she wrapped her hand around my thick length, my knees nearly buckled.

  “Fuuuck,” I moaned. I fisted her hair and pulled back so she could look up at me. “Want to play a little?” I was in need of a little submission from my woman.

  “Whatever you would like to do,” she purred, continuing to stroke me.

  I smirked at her. “Good answer. I’m going to be rough,” I warned in my best sinister tone. She tapped her finger on my lips.

  “I will take you any way I can get you.”

  I tugged back on her hair a little rougher than before and she gasped. I leaned over and my lips were so close to hers that air couldn’t pass between them. She was in for a wild fucking ride. “Suck me,” I growled.

  She immediately dropped down and took me in her mouth. A groan tore out of my throat. Her lips and mouth were so soft, and when she raked her teeth up and down my shaft, my knees went weak.

  “Jesus suffering fuck!” I barked out a little too loudly, my voice echoing through the stillness of the night air.

  I grabbed onto the back of her head and started pumping into her. Every time she took me deep, I threw my head back, my mouth hanging wide open. She choked and gagged, making me crazy. I had to stop before I exploded. I pulled J.T. out of her mouth and she gasped, but waited patiently for my next command.

  “Get up,” I growled.

  Quinn stood up and I spun her around, pressing her down so that she was laying over the boulder. I yanked her black pants down and threw them…somewhere. I jammed my fingers into her heat. She was already wet. Such a good woman, ready for me before my command. I loved knowing that sucking me off turned her on as much as it did me. She gasped and started panting when I hit that magic spot deep inside.

  I leaned forward and nipped her ear. “Feel good, love?”

  “God…yes,” she moaned. I reached down and pinched her swollen nub, causing her to yelp. I chuckled.

  I continued to massage her, feeling her moisture run down my hand. I pulled my hand away and licked her juices off my fingers. So sweet on my tongue. I gave her a sharp slap across her arse, causing her to hiss. I rubbed the area and spanked the other cheek. She was panting under my rough touch.

  I leaned over her again, pulling her hair so her head was twisted around toward mine. “You doing okay? Want more?”

  “Please…I need more.”

 
; “If it gets to be too much, you need to stop me.”

  “Okay,” she said breathlessly. “Please…more.”

  “My pleasure,” I murmured against her lips.

  I tipped back and grabbed her hips, rubbing myself against her. Just feeling her against me made me want to come all over her. I needed to control myself.

  I pushed a few fingers into her body, listening to her gasp with my every move. With my free hand, I smacked her arse again.

  “Oh god…,” she moaned. I continued to massage and cracked her harder. “Oh fuck,” she bit out.

  She was getting close. I could hear it in her voice and feel her random pulsations around my fingers. I pulled out my fingers and she protested. I laid across her back and twisted her hair in my fist, yanking her head back to me once again.

  “I’m going to fuck you until you scream. Understood?” She moaned an acknowledgment.

  I positioned myself directly behind her and held my J.T. to her moist center. I rubbed my blunt tip up and down until she was squirming under me. Her body was begging for me and it turned me on so much. I smirked and slammed right into her. She yelped as I punched her insides.

  My hands crawled up her shirt and grabbed her sides. I began furiously pumping into her. Quinn was gripping onto the boulder as best she could, and I knew I had to be leaving marks on her sides from my unyielding grip. She was panting, and her body tensing. I continued to pound into her, our bodies loudly slapping together.

  “Come on, love. Give it up,” I growled, pumping harder and faster.

  “Gunther!” she cried out she clamped down on me. She cried out again as her body quaked, sending me down the path of no return. Her moans were uncontrolled and strangled, and I loved every fucking second of it.

  “Fuck, love…” I was so close. I pushed down in between her shoulder blades, pushing her into the boulder. I slammed into her several more times until I pulled out. “Finish me!” I barked, spinning her around to face me. She dropped back down to her knees and took me into her mouth, sucking me into ecstasy.