Hey, Good Looking

by Fern Michaels

  “Well…I suppose that’s a…the police don’t have a clue. I’m going to have another drink. Do you want a drink, Ben? Maybe you should go over to Bella’s. You are Marcus’s son. Yes, yes, you should go over there.”

  “Why, Ducky? What can I possibly do?”

  “I don’t know why. Marcus is your father. You’re his son. It’s going to look strange if you don’t…show some kind of reaction. What other reason do you need? The man is your father.”

  “He probably went for a walk and got lost. By the way, I thought you went to Rayne.” The question that wasn’t exactly a question hung in the air.

  “I did…we did…but we came back. This morning. I had lunch with Bella today. The Garden Club is going to nominate Bella and Marcus’s house for the Christmas Candlelight Tour. I had to interview her…but none of that is important.” Ducky tried for a compassionate smile, but it wobbled on her face.

  Ben narrowed his eyes; he wasn’t buying her story. “Where are Dodo and Diddy?”

  Ducky sucked in air. Brandy always made her belligerent. “Why do you want to know? I’m not their keeper just like they aren’t my keeper.”

  Ben backed up a step, his hands in the air, palms outward. “Whoa. Look, obviously, I came over here at a bad time. Darby and I are going to order Chinese. She wanted to know if you three wanted any.”

  “No, thank you. MSG doesn’t agree with me. I haven’t had Chinese inyears. No, thank you,” she added again as an afterthought. Then she took another belt from the brandy bottle. “I really think you should go over to your father’s house to…to…”

  “To what, Ducky?”

  “To help find him. He’s your father. You are his son. That’s why.” She gulped again. She was getting light-headed. She looked down at the bottle in her hand. She’d seriously depleted its contents.

  “So, where are Dodo and Diddy?” Ben asked a second time.

  “I told you, I don’t know. I don’t much care for your attitude, young man.”

  The screen door opened to admit Dodo and Diddy. They took one look at Ducky’s red face and knew they were looking at trouble.

  “Ben came over because he and Darby want to know if we want Chinese tonight. I told him no,” Ducky said, slurring her words. “I told him his father disappeared, and he should go over there to see what’s happening. He won’t go.” Ducky sat down with a thump on the kitchen chair, her hold on the brandy bottle tight and secure.

  Ben frowned, certain now that Darby was right and the three of them were up to something. “Listen, I just got back from Metairie. I went to talk to the people at LOPA. Do you want to know what I found out?”

  “Not right now. Tomorrow will be soon enough,” Diddy said, taking charge and ushering their guest to the back door. “Right now we have some work to do for the Garden Club. I’m sorry about your father’s disappearance. I’m sure…he’ll…he’ll turn up eventually.” She gave Ben a final push, and he was out the door. She slammed the door, then locked it.

  “What happened, Ducky?” Diddy and Dodo asked in unison. Then Diddy continued. “You look guilty, like you did something wrong. All you did was have lunch with Bella. We did the dirty deed. Now, what did they say on the news? Don’t leave anything out either.”

  Ducky fondled the brandy bottle, her new best friend. “They said the nurse had some kind of blackout, and she’s in the hospital. They still aren’t saying if Marcus was snatched or if he wandered off. Bella was wringing her hands and sobbing, but there weren’t any tears. Then Ben came in and saw the news report. Ben was shocked at the news. That young man really does care about his father. Right now he doesn’t quite know what to do or how to act. He’s been bitter for so long, these new feelings are alien to him. He has to work this out himself. All we can do is be here for him if he needs us,” Ducky concluded, but then she saw that her sisters were rolling their eyes. “Don’t look at me like that. I can read that young man like a book. I saw the concern in his eyes. And, his hands were shaking. What that means to us is when he next sees his father, Ben will convince him to turn on Bella.”

  “Ducky, are you sure that isn’t all wishful thinking on your part? Did this brandy have anything to do with what you thought you saw in Ben?” Diddy said as she snatched the brandy bottle from her sister’s hands and placed it on the counter.

  “Not a thing. I heard his voice crack. The boy cares, no matter how he denies it.”

  “All right,” Dodo said soothingly. “What exactly did Bella do or say that upset you?”

  “She didn’t have tosay anything. You didn’t see that woman’s face. I did. She’s going to come after us. Just wait, they’ll be showing her interview all night long. Did Fred say anything?”

  “No. We just switched vehicles, and off he went. Diddy, make Ducky some coffee. I’m going to cook dinner.”

  A statement like that was usually a cause for alarm between the sisters, but today they rolled with it and watched as Dodo got out bread, peanut butter, and jelly.

  Darby sat back on her workbench to stare at the frame she’d constructed for the Scottish castle. She nodded to herself. The frame was always the hardest, the trickiest part of constructing a dollhouse or, in this case, a castle. She sensed a flurry of movement behind her. Willie. She turned to see Ben and Willie standing in the doorway. She didn’t like the expression she saw on Ben’s face. “What? What’s wrong? What did they tell you in Metairie?”

  “Have you had the radio or television on this afternoon?” Ben asked hoarsely.

  “No. Why? What happened? You’re scaring me. The aunts…” she said, her own face draining of all color. Willie woofed to be heard.

  “The aunts are fine. Well, Ducky looks schnockered but…my father has disappeared. Either he wandered off or he was kidnapped. It was on the news,” Ben said in a choked voice.

  “Oh, God, I’m sorry, Ben. Is that why Ducky’s tipsy? No, that can’t be right. It would be Diddy who would have been drinking. I thought they went to Rayne. Obviously, they’re back. Wait just a minute…you don’t think…you can’t believe…oh, God, yes, it does make sense. Did…did they…did they look…guilty?”

  “Hell, yes, they looked guilty. And belligerent. They kicked me out of Dodo’s kitchen. They didn’t even want to know what I found out in Metairie. Which, by the way, was nothing. I was stonewalled every step of the way. Incidentally, your aunts don’t want to share our Chinese.”

  Darby dropped to the floor and sat Indian fashion, Willie half-on and half-off her lap. “What should we do? Are you going to Bella’s house? Should we confront the aunts? What? Talk to me, Ben.”

  Ben sat down next to her and reached for her hand. She leaned toward him just as flashing red-and-blue lights appeared beyond the workroom windows. Willie was on his feet, growling and snarling as he pawed at the door. The wailing siren died abruptly. Darby and Ben jumped to their feet. Holding hands, they walked through the house to the back porch, where they could see two police officers walking up the center of the shoe. Darby took a deep breath as she started down the steps.

  “Let me handle this. I think I’m the one they want. Go over to your aunts,” Ben said.

  Darby sprinted across the lawn and around to the front porch where the aunts were sitting. They didnot look like the three wise monkeys. They looked like three nervous old ladies, possibly capable of bluffing their way through anything. Sort of. Kind of.

  “I heard you were back,” Darby said breathlessly. “The cops are here! Ben’s talking to them out back. He told me about his father. He’s really upset.”

  “It’s going to rain,” Ducky said, raising her beer bottle to the sky.

  “The truck broke down,” Dodo said, upending her beer.

  “Dodo cooked dinner. They were the best peanut butter and jelly sandwiches I ever ate. That’s why we don’t want Chinese. Is that more than you wanted to know, dear?” Diddy asked.

  Darby leaned over so that she was almost eyeball-to-eyeball with her aunts. “You snatched him, di
dn’t you?” she hissed just as the two police officers, escorted by Ben, approached the front steps. Darby backed up, her eyes on the aunts, who suddenly looked like they were stone-cold sober.

  Ducky took the initiative. Hands on her hips, she blasted the two police officers, her angry voice carrying in the humid air. “It’s about time you showed up! We have a noise ordinance here in Baton Rouge and as officers of the law, you should be enforcing it. That’s what I pay my taxes for, isn’t it? That ridiculous rap music is still ringing in my ears. Now go up there and put a stop to it!”

  “Ma’am, we’re not here about the rap music. You have to file a complaint, then we’ll come back out. We’re here about the disappearance of Marcus Gunn.”

  Dodo stepped up to the plate. “We heard about it on the news. I don’t blame him for running off. The man can’t handle all the bad press. He knows he isn’t going to get away with demolishing those houses.”

  “So what is it you want?” Diddy asked coldly.

  The second officer stepped forward. “Mrs. Gunn said she had lunch with a Harriet Lane. Which one of you is Harriet?”

  “I’m Harriet,” Ducky said. “Yes, we did have lunch. I can’t believe she would tell the policewe had lunch. Did she call the newspapers to tell them, too? We had salmon and a sweet-potato soufflé. Oh, and a glass of wine. So what?”

  “We have to check everything, ma’am. It seems Mr. Gunn disappeared sometime between one-thirty and two o’clock.”

  Dodo crunched up her face as she shrilled, “Are you here to check to see if we havealibis? I haven’t seen that rascal Marcus Gunn in…Lord, I don’t remember when. We were up front going toe-to-toe with those people playing that rap music during that time period. Those men can confirm it. We asked them nicely to stop, and they refused. Go talk to them if you’re serious about us needing an alibi. And that, in itself, is probably the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard of. Ask yourself, do we look capable of what you’re suggesting?”

  “I resent this inquisition,” Diddy said, getting into the act. “We have not associated with Mr. and Mrs. Gunn in over twenty-five years. I expect we will not be associating with them for the next twenty-five years either. You can just put that in your pipe and smoke it, Mr. Police Officer.”

  The two police officers stepped backward at the hard glint in Diddy’s eyes.

  The older of the two officers homed in on Darby. “What about you, miss? Where were you between one-thirty and two o’clock?”

  “I was working in my workshop. No, no one but the dog was with me. I guess I have no alibi. Oh, oh, wait. Actually, I was on a long-distance call to my client in Scotland. We talked for over thirty minutes. I think the call came in around 1:20 or so. You can verify that with the phone company. Now, if you’ll excuse me, Ben and I were going to go out for Chinese. Please wait up for us,” she said, addressing the aunts. “We’ll bring you some fortune cookies.”

  The police officers shuffled backward. They were dismissed, and they knew it. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.They were in charge. But, the commissioner himself had sent down word that they were to tread lightly when speaking with the Lane sisters.

  When everyone was gone from the front porch, Diddy spoke anxiously. “Did we pull it off? Should we call Trixie?”

  “No, we should not call Trixie, at least not from our phones. Wait a minute. I have a phone card because of all the traveling I do. If we use it, there’s no way to trace the call. But wait until Darby and Ben are gone. It’s next to the phone in the kitchen,” Ducky said.

  Ducky moved to the swing and started to pump her legs. Dodo moved out of range. “Do you think Bella is going to call us tonight?”

  “No, she isn’t, Ducky. Right now, she’s trying to piece it all together. Not that she can do much about it. We pulled off aclean job. Listen! They finally stopped playing that awful music.” Dodo almost swooned.

  “I’m surprised I haven’t heard from the private detective in N’awlins,” Ducky said, swinging almost to the ceiling. “He said he would call late today.” She slowed and hopped off to sit on the rocker. “This is so depressing, Dodo. Rocking on a rocking chair on the front porch is forold people.”

  Dodo snapped her fingers under her sister’s nose. “Hello, there, Ducky! This may come as a surprise to you, but we are old. Rocking is a comfort to me. You, too, but you just won’t admit it. I’m sure Marcus is going to be just fine. I hope Diddy can handle whatever it is he finally tells her. The good news is that Marcus is recovering and appears to be grateful that we snatched him. You know, we were so rude to Ben. He wanted to tell us about his trip to talk to the LOPA people, and we didn’t even give him a chance to tell us. How could we have done that? We got into this mess because of dear Russell in the first place.”

  “That’s all well and good but we still don’t know if Marcus will turn on Bella and stop the demolition of the Gunn houses.”

  “We didn’t let him talk because we were too damn busy trying to cover our collective asses, that’s why. I’m worried about the FBI,” Ducky whined.

  “I’m not,” Dodo said confidently. “The minute we hear they’re involved, we call Trixie, tell her to buy a phone card, and then Marcus can call the FBI and tell them he’s fine and he left under his own power. You’re working yourself up over nothing.”

  “I’ll remind you of that when they’re carting you off in handcuffs. I’ll be left behind because I was having lunch with Bella.” Ducky sniffed to show what she thought of her sister’s plan.

  “And how long do you think Honoria will keep quiet. She’ll sing like a canary, and we both know it. You’re as involved in this whole mess as Diddy and I are.”

  “I wish you’d shut up, Dodo. You’re giving me a headache. Fred forgot to bring back the wheelbarrow. Ben and Darby are going to notice that.”

  “You’re a sadist, Dodo. You didn’t have to tell me that, now did you? You just want me to worry even more. So what if they notice it, so what?”

  Dodo dropped her head until her chin was resting on her skinny chest. “I don’t think we were meant for a life of crime. It’s entirely too stressful.”

  “This was all your idea, you…you…ninja.”

  “I’m going to take that as a compliment,” Dodo growled.

  Diddy appeared at the bottom of the steps. She looked up at her sisters, giving them a thumbs-up. “Marcus is fine. Flash is with him, and he’s sleeping for the night. The doctor called a half hour ago to check on him. Trixie said he’s A-1. Said she gave him a drink and a cigarette. The doctor is going to check again in the morning. Fred got home okay, and the wheelbarrow is with the good doctor. She said we should go to bed and let the professionals take over. I think she means her and Fred. Being the professionals, that is.”

  “Go to bed! I can’t sleep,” Dodo said.

  “Who can sleep with the thought the FBI is going to come into this at the end of twenty-four hours. Not me, that’s for sure,” Ducky said with a quiver in her voice.

  “What do you suggest we do to wile away the night?” Diddy asked as she lowered her ample frame onto a rocking chair.

  “What we do best, drink,” Dodo and Ducky said in unison.

  The hour was late, a few minutes past eleven, when Bella Gunn’s doorbell rang. With the servants retired for the evening, it was up to Bella to open the door herself. She looked at the two police officers and motioned for them to enter the house. She prepared herself to play the part of the worried wife. She dabbed at her eyes with a lace-edged hankie.

  “I hope…please tell me you aren’t here to give me bad news.” She sniffled into the hankie.

  “No, ma’am. We said we would report any new developments. We spoke with the three Lane sisters. Miss Harriet Lane confirmed that she had lunch with you. The Misses Lydia and Vivian were up at the Horseshoe arguing with the foreman you hired at the time your husband disappeared. We weren’t able to reach the foreman until a little after ten. He said they gave him a lot of grief about his men pl
aying rap music. Miss Darby Lane said she was working in her workshop and was on an international call with a client from Scotland at the time. She said the client called her. We checked with the international operator and what she said is true. Your stepson Benjamin Gunn was in Metairie. He was there during the entire time in question. He has a complete record of every single person he talked with. The offices are closed now, but Mr. Gunn had enough material and notes to prove he was there. We will of course verify all that in the morning when the offices open.”

  “What offices are you talking about, Officer?”

  “The Louisiana Organ Procurement Agency.”

  How interesting,Bella mused to herself. Ben could dig all he wanted but she’d still get her way—acceptance, finally, by theRougies, inclusion in the Christmas tour, and a conditional license to refurbish the houses on the shoe.Dig, Ben, dig all you want. You can’t stop me now and neither can your father because he knows that I’ll reveal his deep, dark secret. He’ll be ruined. You’ll be tainted, too, dear Ben. Even those snippy Lane sisters will be tainted by association.

  Now she was going to take a nice long bubble bath and dream about tomorrow and all the tomorrows yet to come. Life was certainly looking sweet at the moment. She didn’t give another thought to her missing husband as she started to run the water into her Jacuzzi.

  14

  Ben Gunn slid into the booth across from Darby. He reached to take both her hands in his. He smiled, and Darby’s heart rate quickened. She smiled in return. Ben was forced to release her hands when a waitress appeared with menus along with a bowl of hard noodles, duck sauce, and hot mustard.

  “I missed you today, Ben. I thought about you all afternoon while I was working. I’m sorry I didn’t go with you to Metairie. It was my place to go since I’m the executrix of Russell’s will, but my little client won out. I have to finish her dollhouse-slash-castle on time. Should we talk about your trip first or should we talk about your father’s disappearance and the aunts’ possible involvement?” She felt breathless just sitting across from Ben.