Losing Her (The Lexington Series Book 1)

by Belle Winters

  “Lucy.” I kept looking past him. “Lucy, look at me.” he said again. This time there was no room for argument. I reluctantly met his eyes.

  “Who did this to you?” he asked softly. I would think he was the gentlest person in the world right now if it wasn’t for the fight in his features. His body was strung tight like he would snap at the smallest thing.

  “It wasn’t a big deal, you know.” I told him with a shrug.

  “Lucy…” he said impatiently. He changed our stance and backed me into my locker. He bought his head down until his mouth was next to my ear. “I’m ready to commit murder right now, you understand. Now I need you to tell me who did this, or else I might let loose on the whole damn school. And if you didn’t know, Nick is not too far off over there. Even Mel looks ready for blood. Now please put me out of my misery and tell me Who. The. FUCK thought I was o fucking k to put their hands on you.” He said to my ear. The power and anger was so strong you could smell it.

  I shook my head, “I don’t want either of you to do anything to get you in trouble. Don’t worry about it, alright?” I tried to reassure him.

  He dropped his forehead against mine and let out a shaky breath. This time when he spoke I knew it was through clenched teeth. “Lucy, don’t fuck with me. Not right now. This time that passive aggressive or running away shit is not going to work. I’m not accepting that, we can stand here all day until you tell me. Or I can find out on my own, and if you don’t like this way then you won’t like me having to break people’s arms and fucking legs to get them to snitch. I won’t do that shit to you or even Mel, but everyone else is fair game. Now Lucy, are you going to tell me what I need to know or are we going to get comfortable here?” he asked.

  I looked up at him. I finally realized that beyond all that barely controlled rage was concern. I sighed, what’s the point of even trying to hide it. “Dan came over yesterday while you guys were playing pool and I was cooking. He was pretty pissed about us kissing at the game. We kind of got into a fight when he insinuated we were sleeping together. He was just really jealous. I got really angry then too, and I told him that I didn’t want to talk anymore. I mean we were both mad and the only thing that would come out is insults and stuff right? He tried to pull me in and talk me into spending time together or whatever but I was too angry. He had his hands on my arms while we were talking I don’t think he realized how tight he was grabbing me. He tried to kiss me and I wouldn’t let him so he released me and kinda pushed me back into the wall. But then he left, and I finished cooking. I haven’t spoken to him since, and when I do I’ll tell him it’s over. That can’t happen again.” Landon’s eyes held mine and the longer I spoke the darker they got.

  He grabbed both of my hands and brought my arms up one by one placing kisses on the bruises. When he was done he pulled me into a hug. I put my head against his chest and looked up to see Nick and Mel were standing close enough to have heard the story. Nicks neck was bright red as if the anger was literally flowing up his body. I buried my face into Landon’s chest as he held me. After a couple of minutes, he pulled back and grabbed my books in one arm and my hand. “Let’s go to class.” He said, but his voice sounded almost strangled. I shivered. I didn’t want anyone to hurt because of this. It’s not like he hit me or something.

  I noticed Dan wasn’t in school today, thank god. When we went to lunch no one sat at our table but us. Delilah came over, and put her tray down in front of the seat on the other side of Landon. She scowled at his arm over my shoulder. When she pulled out the chair, Landon just looked at her and shook his head. Her jaw dropped and she opened her mouth to say something, and he just shook his head again. She looked into his eyes, and that murderous look was still there. She swallowed hard and decided she didn’t want this fight. Smart girl.

  Afterschool, Landon held my hand to the parking lot. When I went to go to my car his hold tightened and he pulled me to his. I fussed with him about how the heck and I going to get my car and he shrugged and said that the answer was simple. I would just be forced to ride in with him in the morning. I caved. He was pretty down all day, and I knew it was because of me so I gave him what he wanted. Max was there when we got home, so I sat to help him with his homework while I did mine. Nick and Landon joined us. They kept making subtle looks at each other, but it was their way of talking that only they understood. That was fine because me and Max did that with smiles, ok fine I was a little jealous. I wanted to know what they were thinking or better yet going to do. I made spaghetti and meatballs with garlic bread and salad since it was Landon’s favorite. He was pissing me off with this sad puppy look he’s been wearing all day. I fixed up the plates and poured them something to drink. I put my plate down between Landon and Max, right before I sat to eat the doorbell rang.

  I looked at Nick and grinned. It’s not surprising Mel would come over being a worrywart like these two were being. But it should brighten up Nick’s day being able to mess with her. I said to Nick, “Now you have to promise not to hump her leg when she comes in otherwise I won’t open the door.”

  That got them both to laugh, and Nick held up his hands in a scouts honor. I threw a napkin at him and laughed. I went to the Door and saw it was Dan. I gave him a finger and slammed it closed. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. FUCKKK! This was not good. The boys were definitely within ear shot and the last thing I needed was a scene, especially with Max there. I ran into the kitchen with my best pleading look.

  “Listen, its Dan…” Landon automatically got up from his seat and started walking that way. I placed my hands on his chest and shook my head. I pointed to his seat, “Sit. Down.” He didn’t sit but he didn’t walk to the door either. I’ll take my small victory.

  “I’m going to let him in, and I will talk to him. You are both in close enough distance to hear what is going on. I just want to let him know that it’s over so that he doesn’t think its ok to continue to come around and things. I promise that if anything happens I will say something for you guys to come. Otherwise just let me get rid of him, ok?” I pleaded.

  “Lucy…” Landon started while shaking his head.

  “Please Landon? Look Max is here we don’t need this, especially at home. I promise I won’t let anything happen. Please?” I begged.

  He grunted and moved to lean against the counter. So he wasn’t going to sit, like I said I’ll take the small victories. The doorbell rang again. Nick frowned and looked like he was about to get up. Oh god, I don’t think I can stop them both. I held up both hands. “I swear guys, seriously.” Landon heaved a deep sigh like I’m the reason for gray hair around the world and nodded.

  I ran back to the door before he rang it again… I don’t think that I would be able to hold back to two pit bulls in the kitchen waiting to attack.

  I opened it and motioned for him to step inside. He gave me a warm smile and I couldn’t return it. His expression became weary.

  “Dan, what are you doing here?” I asked him bluntly.

  “You said you needed time to cool off so we can talk. I was hoping I gave you enough time.” He responded as if that was the easiest thing to understand.

  I rubbed my forehead. Here goes nothing, “Look Dan. I don’t think we should see each other anymore. This isn’t working. You need someone who has more time than I do, and I need someone who isn’t so jealous and… handsy.” I told him, crossing my arms over my chest.

  His brows furrowed, “what do you mean? You want to break up? But why? I mean, I know I got mad… but can you blame me? I watched you kissing another guy on TV.” He seemed genuinely confused.

  “I don’t blame you for being upset by seeing that. That is natural, and we probably could’ve worked through this if it hadn’t gotten so bad so fast.” I gulped this was the part I hadn’t mentioned before and I knew they were now listening, “then you said you loved me -“

  He cut me off and reached for my hands but I stepped back and his arms dropped back to his sides, “You don’t get it Lucy. I do, I do love you.
You have no idea.” He brought his hand up to rub the back of his neck. When he dropped his hand back down he sighed and dropped his head, “You can’t leave me Lucy. Not like this, not over a misunderstanding. We were both angry yesterday.” He reached into his pocket and when he pulled it out his palm was closed. “I wanted you to know how serious I am about us.” He opened his hand and there was a ring in it that looked strangely like an engagement ring. I gasped and my hands flew to my mouth. He gave me a full blown smile, which any other time I found adorable. I think he was misinterpreting my actions as joy when really I was horrified.

  He stepped forward and I stepped back. He dropped down to one knee. Oh no. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. this was a nightmare, and I needed to wake up now. What was he doing? I should’ve fucking listened to Nick when he said something wasn’t right. The constant just popping up, where the shit did I miss all of this? He was on his fucking knee with an engagement ring and we’ve only been dating for how many weeks. We haven’t even flipping had sex. I’m in the twilight zone or something.

  He looked up at me and his eyes were misted, “Lucy, I’m not asking this for today, or tomorrow, or next year… even five years from now. What I want you to know is that I believe in us, and we can make it. All you have to do is give me a chance and you’ll see that you love me too. I can see it in your eyes, your mind just needs to play catchup with your heart. And I can wait for that as long as you need me too. If you just forget about Landon you’ll see it.” and here we are full circle, back to Landon. “Trust me Lucy. He’s a player and think of what he’s done to you all these years, I still don’t even understand how you could forgive him. But that is the pureness of your heart.” A tear slid down, are you fucking kidding me right now. I kind of feel like shit that he seems to be pouring out his heart and all I can think about is running and hiding, laughing, or jumping around asking where’s the camera’s because I have to be on Punk’d. “I’m the man for you. I’m your soul mate. I knew it the moment I met you. You remember don’t you? We looked at each other and you smiled at me, you looked so happy and I knew you felt your heart skip a beat like mine. Your expression said what my heart did. It’s like we were connected.” Holy Shit. He’s bat shit fucking crazy. I have no idea what he’s talking about. I don’t even remember when i met him. I need to remember to leave an anonymous tip with the school counselor to give this kid a psychiatric evaluation.

  I took a deep breath, “Look Dan. You’re a nice guy but I can’t do this.” I told him honestly. No need to go into detail on how I really felt about everything right?

  “I know we’re way too young. This is just a promise that one day we will be engaged and get married. For now you wear it as a sign of our love. Then when we’re ready we’ll become engaged and you can continue to wear this ring or I can get you another if you like. This will show all the guys like Landon you’re off limits and they’ll leave you alone.” He explained.

  Ok, fine. This wasn’t working out the way I wanted it to by playing nice. “Look. This has nothing to do with Landon ok, so you can stop bringing him up. This is between you and me. I have to tell you the truth and say that I’m a tad bit freaked out here. Love, engagement… we’ve only been dating for a few weeks. I’m still working on the ‘like’ portion. And this won’t work out if you think it’s ok to leave bruises on me because you’re jealous of me kissing Landon. You’re right, it was kind of fucked up – but it happened and I apologized. It was your choice whether to accept the apology or not. You just show up all the time unannounced, you have no idea what I could be doing.” I told him.

  His eyes narrowed, “then what have I interrupted today?” he snapped.

  I threw my hands on my hips, “I was literally just sitting down to eat because I’m fucking starving. But I’m here talking to you because you showed up without an invitation and my food is probably sitting there ice cold. But it’s not like those things matter to you so long as you have my undivided attention.” I sighed. “Listen, we shouldn’t be arguing right now. We’re not cut out for this. A relationship, but we can be friends. I do think you’re a nice guy.” I explained.

  He shook his head, “it’s because you never gave me a chance is why. I saw the way you guys kissed. That’s why I can’t let it go! You never kissed me like that… why?!” he demanded.

  So that’s how it’s going to be? Fine, when you go digging too deep you find shit that you wished you hadn’t looked for. By then it’s just too fucking late. I looked him squarely in the eye. “I don’t kiss you like that because you’re not him. When I kiss you, I’m kissing you, I’m kissing Dan. And what we feel in that moment is our chemistry. Yes there is some, that’s what you wanted to know?” I asked him.

  His head hung, “and what do you feel when you kiss him? I’m starting to get it was more than once.” He asked.

  “Are you sure you want to know?” I arched an eyebrow to let him see that he’s not going to like it. He nodded.

  “Fine. When we kiss, the chemistry is off the fucking charts. I mean come on… you’ve seen it for yourself. That’s why you’re hung up on it.” I threw my arms up in frustration. “IT’S FUCKING HOT! It could melt your panties and you don’t even wear those… at least, I don’t think you do.” I stated. Ok, way to go Luce. You could’ve been a little gentler but I don’t think he would’ve gotten the point any other way.

  He nodded. “Yea, you’re right. So you guys are together now right? It’s no hard feelings. I can understand.” He stated.

  I shook my head, the annoyance had to be extremely evident on my face, “no. didn’t I tell you we are not now nor have we ever been together. I never lied to you. That is the truth, as I said me breaking up with you has everything to do with us and not him. To be completely honest, without what happened yesterday I would’ve broken up with you for that engagement stunt. That’s a bit too far for our very limited history.” I told him, “but we can be friends as I said before, but only as long as you can respect the boundaries that come with that type of relationship.”

  He nodded, “I can do that. I’d rather have you as a friend than nothing. You’re amazing Lucy.” He walked to the door and opened it, before he walked out he turned back “see you at lunch tomorrow?” he asked hopefully.

  I nodded, “sure. We always sit at the same spot.” He gave me a small sad smile and nodded again before he left. I locked up the door and headed back into the kitchen.

  Nick was standing at the stove making seconds. I see even ready to fight he still can’t deny food. Landon was in the same spot that I left him in, when he saw me enter he took his seat and started eating. I noticed my glass of juice was empty. I picked it up and looked at Nick. When he met my stare I raised my empty glass and shook it. He grinned and shrugged. I knew it was his greedy ass because Landon hadn’t moved from where I left him. I went to the fridge and poured more juice, I looked over at Max’s and just brought the whole pitcher. I filled up his glass and Nicks. Landon drained half of his glass then raised it to me in question. I laughed lightly as I filled it back up. He grinned giving me a dimple. I’ll pour him a thousand more cups if that’s my reward.

  Nick crossed my path as he walked back to his seat with his plate full and I returned the juice to the fridge. As soon as I closed the fridge and turned Nick started, “So… your chemistry,” he gestured back and forth between me and Landon, “is off the charts huh?” His smirk turned into a huge smile. “And so fucking hot?” he asked. I could feel my cheeks flaming. Fuck! I forgot they were listening. Shit. Shit. Shit. I glanced at Landon who just finished chewing and gave me a smug grin. I scowled at him and his grin turned into a full blown smile. “It could melt a man’s panties… even if he isn’t wearing them, hot damn can I get some of this action?” god my face was flaming.

  “Shut it Nick, before I take away your food for being annoying.” I told him.

  He laughed so hard, I’m talking about slapping his knee gripping his stomach. I didn’t think it was that funny. “You canno
t take my food away because of something that YOU said that I just happened to hear. That isn’t my fault. I’m just a curious innocent bystander here. I had to listen to you rip that poor guys heart to shreds after proposing to you. I think I may have shed a tear.” Nick joked.

  I elbowed him, “shut it punk, before I rip you to shreds.” I muttered.

  He laughed harder, “Rarrrr, you let out your claws today huh pumpkin?”

  I’m going to kick Nick’s ass. “Landon, are you going to let him tease me?” I asked dragging him into this.

  He looked at both of us and moved his head from side to side as if he was thinking it over, “Yep.” He said.

  My mouth dropped open, “you know, he’s teasing you too right?” I asked.

  Landon grinned, “no he’s not. You said I kiss better than Dan does. I’m being complimented here. It’s not my fault you made another guy fall in love with you.” Landon said then shrugged his shoulders as he stuffed his mouth.

  I slammed my palms down on the counter in frustration. “Whatever forget the both of you.” I took a sip of my juice then turned to Landon, “and your kisses suck for the record.” I said proudly. Take that you ass.

  I scooped up a mouthful of pasta and just as I was about to take a bit my fork was snatched. Landon polished it off then dropped my fork on my plate. “What did you say?” he asked narrowing his eyes.

  “You heard me, and stop stealing my shit.” I said with as much attitude as I could muster. “You two always got your damn hands on my food and drinks.” I muttered.

  He watched me for a beat and then nodded his head to something. He began eating again. About 5 minutes passed when he turned to me and said, “Remember you said that. But too bad I can’t remind you how good my kisses are. I promised to keep these hot lips to myself until you trusted me. So you’ll just have to suffer.”