Beautifully Broken

by Bailey B

  The chair beside me moves. I shift to look, fully expecting to see Rex, but am met with golden locks, blue eyes, and a smile laced with arsenic. Tad. He grabs my wrist and sets it on the table. From a distance, we look like a cute couple having an intimate conversation. We are anything but. Tad leans closer. I tug my arm to pull away but he holds it firm against the tablecloth. “I’m sorry.”

  What? I stare at him dumbfounded. Does he really think saying sorry weeks later for practically dragging me into the bathroom makes everything alright? It’s a start but I’m not about to validate his actions by saying thank you. “Okay.”

  “They were there.” He yells, his eyes skirting across the room for a minute before finding my face again. “I didn’t have a choice.”

  “Who was there?” And where? Inside the actual bathrooms? Tad must have been tripping hard if he was hallucinating people that day. Tad’s chair slides back, dragging me out of the seat. He let’s go of my wrist, but not before I hit the ground. I brush myself off in time to see Rex towering over Tad. I grab Rex’s arm. He turns to me, fire in his eyes. Tad looks like he’s about to shit himself and rightfully so. I cup Rex’s cheeks and pull him so he can hear me. “I’m fine. He was saying sorry.”

  Rex looks at Tad again. “Go.”

  Tad scampers out of the chair faster than he moved all football season. Rex throws his arm around me. “You sure you’re alright?”

  I nod and pull him to the dance floor. I may have the moves of a drunken toddler, but we need a distraction. Tonight’s supposed to be fun. Drama free. Luckily for me, the DJ chooses this moment to play a slow song. I lean into Rex and let him sway us to a song I recognize but don’t actually know. I close my eyes, imagining what it would be like if I didn’t have to say goodbye. In a perfect world, we’d get married, have two beautiful kids together. He’d go pro, traveling the country playing hockey and I’d…I don’t know what I’d do. I open my eyes and stare at the buttons on his shirt. What I’d do in that fantasy life doesn’t matter because the reality is, it all ends tonight.

  The rest of the night is a blur of dancing, snacking, and drinking punch which must have been spiked because I’m feeling good. My head’s spinning. Actually my whole body is. I laugh as Rex pulls me into his chest again. What little coordination I had is gone. I trip over my own feet and fall into his arms. Tender lips find my forehead. I hug him tight, smiling into his shirt. His heart is racing, “Want to head up to the room?”

  I look around, instantly aware that most of the couples have disappeared. We are two of the maybe twenty people left, everyone else having taken off for the night. “What about Cooper and Jenny?”

  Rex spins me again. I laugh as he pulls me back into his arms, dipping me backwards as the song comes to an end. “They snuck out a while ago.”

  “Oh, okay.”

  Rex takes my hand and leads me to the elevator. My heart pounds against my chest. I’m surprised he can’t hear it. Although, my ears are ringing now that the music’s gone; maybe his are too. The elevator dings, the door sliding open. I step in and lean against the rail.

  The moment we’re alone Rex is on me. I don’t have time to think about what’s coming next, his tongue dancing with mine erases all thoughts. All I can focus on are his lips. By the time the doors open on our floor we’re a mess. My dress is wrinkled. Rex’s shirt is untucked, hair disheveled, tie undone. I run my hands down my sides smoothing my gown the best I can and step into the hallway.

  Rex pulls the keycard from his wallet and slips it into the reader. He opens the door, allowing me to enter the room first then closes it behind us. Our room is nothing fancy. I assume the queen-sized bed and TV are standard in all hotels, but I’ve never been in one before. I take in each feature, not wanting to miss a thing when I remember this night. Instances like these are the only time I’m grateful for my photographic memory.

  Warm lips press against my neck. I tilt my head, a sigh of pleasure escaping me. Rex pushes my hair to one side and sinks his teeth into my shoulder. I moan again, knees buckling from the sensation. Rex spins me in his arms and pulls me at the waist. I arch, melting into his mouth when his hands find my cheeks, my waist, my ass. He lifts me, one hand sliding under the slit of my dress. We disconnect, smiling at each other as our bodies bounce against the mattress. When our mouths connect again our tongues twist together in a tango they were born to dance. Each move seemingly rehearsed to perfection. We kiss and we kiss until my lips go numb.

  Rex slides down my belly and pulls my dress open from the slit. His calloused hand runs against my inner thigh. “You’re burning up.”

  He’s right, I’m hot everywhere. His hand, ice against my flesh, doesn’t help either. Before Rex I was always cold, wearing the jacket everyone assumed was a fashion statement out of necessity rather than choice. But since being with Rex, I’m hot. My skin is on fire when he’s near. He dips his head between my legs, kissing a tender spot on my inner thigh. “You okay?”

  I close my eyes and nod. Every nerve in my body is firing off. Rex’s hand slides higher, following the edge of my bikini line to my hip. Silence stretches between us. Jenny warned me this moment would come, and I foolishly had hoped for it too. But now that we’re here I’m scared. Crippled by fear for how bad this will hurt. Gerald’s fingers were like knives ripping me apart. From what I’ve felt through Rex’s shorts, he’s got a major package down there.

  “Piper? You’re shaking.” Rex pulls his hand from my hip and pushes the hair out of my face. “What’s wrong.”

  “I’m fine.” I open my eyes and lean up to kiss Rex, but he pulls back.

  Rex brushes his thumb across my cheek, wiping a tear I didn’t know was there away. “Did I hurt you?”

  I feel terrible. All I wanted was a perfect night and here I am ruining it because I can’t get out of my own thoughts. I shake my head.

  Rex leans down and kisses my forehead. “We’ll work through this. I will never push you into doing something you’re not ready for.”

  “But it’s prom.” I’m embarrassed and ashamed. Rex is not Gerald. He will never hurt me. Despite knowing this, I'm still afraid. I trust him with my life, but I’m still scared. Life’s not fair.

  Rex adjusts his pillow and lays beside me. His arm falls over my stomach pulling me into him. “It’s one night. We’ll have many more together.”

  That’s just it. We won’t.

  29

  Rex

  I wake to sunlight peeking through the window, shining on my face. I didn’t expect to have sex with Piper last night. I’m not stupid. You don’t go from kissing a girl with major trauma to fucking her with no build up in between. Not gonna lie, I was disappointed I didn’t get to see what she had on under her dress. Pretty sure it was close to nothing but making intimacy something she will enjoy is far more important than satisfying my curiosity about what color her nipples are. I know this won’t be a quick fix, but I’m in it for the long run.

  After hours of soothing her, Piper finally fell asleep. How she managed to stay asleep in that hot dress is beyond me. I stripped down to my boxers once she was out because I was sweating up a storm. I roll over, expecting to find Piper in bed beside me but instead there’s a note resting on her pillow. I push myself up and grab it.

  Dear Rex,

  One moment, one seemingly insignificant moment can change everything. Meeting you was that moment. The day you saved me from that fucktard Tad changed everything. Even in that terrifying moment, I felt a shift. Before you, every touch whether innocent or not was crippling. But your hands healed me. You awoke things in me I thought died long ago. So, thank you.

  Thank you for teaching me how to feel again. For teaching me how to love.

  I hope you’ll find it in your heart to forgive me. Believe me when I say I don’t want to leave. Walking out this door is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do but I can’t risk Gerald getting his hands on me. Or you. When it’s safe I’ll find you again. I don’t expect you to wait for m
e, but I hope when that day comes, you’ll see me. I hope some part of you will remember the good times we had together and that maybe you’d hug me again. That’s what’s keeping me going. I live for our memories, for your touch.

  Don’t try to find me, I’m already gone.

  Forever yours,

  Piper

  My heart hurts in ways I didn’t know were possible. It’s been broken before, stepped on, crumbled by those I thought cared about me. But never have I had an ache penetrate my soul. I feel empty, a hollow version of myself. How could a day so gut-wrenching follow a near perfect night?

  I slip my shorts on and grab the room card. I don’t have time for a shirt. Frankly, I don’t know where it is and don’t want to waste what precious moments I have looking for it. I run down the hallway and hit the elevator button. I bounce on my toes. This thing is taking forever. Screw it. I hightail it to the stairwell around the corner and run down three flights of stairs. My chest burns but I don’t stop. I can’t stop. I yank the door open and step into the lobby. My heart about jumps out of my body when I see her.

  Piper stands, shoulders squared talking to a burly man covered in tattoos from his neck and probably down beneath his jacket. Who in their right mind wears a full jacket in May in Florida? Does he have a death wish? Fucking heat stroke is no joke.

  “Piper!” I yell.

  She whirls around, her face white as a ghost. “Go back upstairs, Rex.”

  Like hell I’m going back to the room. Does she really think I’m not going to fight for her? I’m fucking loaded. Not saying that money fixes everyone’s problems. Hell, it’s caused more tourble in my family than it’s worth but it can damn sure keep her safe. I cross the lobby with purposeful strides. “No, we need to talk.”

  “You’d be wise to listen to her, Son,” the man growls. He turns his attention back to Piper. “Let’s go.”

  Piper takes a step closer to him. I run the last few steps and reach out. My fingertips graze her pillow soft skin, but then he grabs her by the arm. He pulls her nearly flush against him, her back to his chest. “Last chance boy. Leave before things get messy.”

  “Get your hands off my girl.” I demand. This must be him, that Gerald guy Piper has been worried about. Outside of his dark hair, this dude looks nothing like Bane. Lucky fucker took after his mom.

  Gerald reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small black gun. The girl behind the counter screams. I’d forgotten she was there but maybe she’ll do something with her life and call the cops.

  “Leave him alone, Gerald,” Piper pleads. “He’s just a kid.”

  I’m not a kid, but the argument is pointless. There are more important things, like freeing my girl from the near chokehold. I look around, the lobby is empty and we are in the center of it, too far to reach anything. My best bet is to tackle him and push the hand with the gun away at the same time. Piper will get hurt, but he’ll let her go and she can run. Then I can beat the living shit out of this scum until the cops come.

  “A stupid fucking kid,” Gerald says waving the gun in my face. “You have until the count of three to disappear before I make you disappear.”

  “I’m not leaving without her.”

  “One…”

  “Rex, go. I’ll be fine.”

  “Two…”

  This dude won’t shoot. My dad would have his head if he hurts me. “Let. Her. Go.”

  The dude chuckles. “Stupid boy. Thr—”

  “No!” Piper screams.

  The gun goes off. The boom echoes through the lobby. I’m thrown backwards, falling on my ass but I feel ok. My ears ring. My heart races. Motherfucker shot at me!

  “Stupid bitch,” Gerald grumbles.

  And then I see her. The reason I fell. The reason I feel okay. Piper lays a foot away. A puddle collecting around her, staining the shirt she stole from me a shade of red no one should see. Sirens sound in the distance. I slide closer and pull her onto my lap. Blood pours out of her shoulder like a faucet. I press my hands over the hole. It needs to stop.

  It has to stop.

  There’s more shooting, outside the building but everything sounds far away. A tremor ripples through Piper’s body. It’s the only sign of life I’ve seen since she fell and it’s not much to go on considering she’s barely breathing. Tears well in my eyes. “Piper!”

  Out of nowhere, I’m surrounded by cops, firemen, and paramedics. A set of hands lift Piper out of my lap. Another moves me out of the way. Someone asks me questions, but I don’t hear them, can barely see them. I run my hands over my face, probably spreading Piper’s blood everywhere.

  “Sir,” a short woman in a police uniform says. “Are you hurt?”

  I shake my head. “No.”

  “Do you know what happened?” she asks.

  “Rex!” A girl calls from behind me. I turn to see Jenny beside Cooper. She screams, covering her mouth with her hands.

  Cooper runs around the semi-hysterical Jenny towards us. “Piper!”

  “Sir, you’ll have to stay back,” the cop says extending her hand.

  “Fuck that,” Cooper pushes past her. “That’s my sister.”

  “Sir!” the cop demands.

  Two other men try to run interference but it’s too late. I can tell by the way Cooper stops in his tracks. He turns, back tracking towards me and shoves me in the shoulder. “What the hell happened?”

  “I don’t know. I came downstairs and that guy Gerald she was worried about was here.”

  “Gerald?” the cop asks.

  “Gerald McCarron,” Cooper tells her.

  “You mean the guy we shot,” the cop points behind her to the door. “Was that local kingpin Gerald McCarron?”

  “If it’s Piper’s Gerald, then yeah,” Cooper says.

  The cop turns her back to us. She walks towards the group of paramedics working on Piper, whispering into her radio. She’s probably not actually whispering, but there’s too much noise. I can’t hear her. I look over my shoulder to check on Jenny. One of the officers has ushered her to a chair and wrapped a blanket around her shoulders.

  “Here,” Cooper says, extending his shirt to me. “Your covered in blood. Wipe your face.”

  “Thanks, man.” I clean myself up as best I can, but the blood’s begun to dry, flaking off in little pieces. There’s movement to our right. Piper’s loaded onto a stretcher with four different paramedics moving her out the door. “Hey!” I yell dropping Cooper’s shirt to the floor. “Where are you taking her?”

  “St. Mary’s,” one paramedic says. He looks from Cooper to me. “I only have room for one and they’re only gonna allow immediate family back.”

  “Go,” I tell Cooper. “I’ll be right behind you.”

  Mamma T and Logan are already in the ICU waiting room when Jenny and I get there. Cooper paces the lobby, a blue scrub for a shirt since he gave me his back at the hotel. Mamma T stands and greets me with a hug, her tiny arms squeezing me as if this moment is all that’s keeping her going. She pulls back, hands on my shoulders and gives me a once over. “You look like hell.”

  I force a smile and shrug. “You should see the other guy.”

  She laughs and pulls me back into her embrace. When she finally releases me, I take a seat next to Logan and wait. Jenny convinces Cooper to stop pacing and sit and holds his hand the entire time. Hours later, a tiny lady in blood covered scrubs appears. “Lovelace family?”

  “It’s Harris, but that’s us,” Mamma T says, and we all stand. We gravitate towards the woman like a magnet. Her gaze bounces from each of us to the next. We must be a sight to see. Cooper in his batman pajama pants and scrub top, Jenny in her oversized Bruins jersey and shorts with pink fuzzy slippers. Mamma T has a dress on, but no makeup and her hair’s in a crazy bun. Logan looks like a vampire in all black. And then there’s me. Blood stained hands, dried flakes of it probably visible underneath the equally stained white shirt and shorts.

  “I’m Dr. Roe. The bullet lodged itself into Piper’
s shoulder blade, but we were able to remove it and fix the artery it nicked.” There’s a whoosh of air as everyone lets out the breaths they were holding. Everyone but me. My lungs ache, but I can’t release it yet because there’s something about Dr. Roe’s expression. She’s smiling, but she’s holding something back too. “But,” Dr. Roe says with caution in her tone. “Piper lost a lot of blood and there were some complications. We put her in a medically induced coma so she can recover.”

  I take a few steps back and collapse into a chair. A coma? I have a million questions, but Mamma T is talking to her. That pain in my chest when I woke up to Piper’s note, it’s nothing compared to the black hole sucking me in now. Jenny walks over and kneels before me, taking my shaking hands in hers. “Rexy-Roo? You okay?”

  I look into Jenny’s eyes but can’t find the words I’m looking for. But to answer her question, no. I’m not okay. The woman I gave my heart to tried to abandon me, only to be stolen from me. Every fear I’ve had about letting someone in happened in one day. The doctor may have said Piper’s surgery went well, but she’s not out of the woods. I’ve seen enough Grey’s Anatomy to know how fast things can change in the hospital.

  Jenny squeezes my hands. “Bring Gretchen down. You need her. I know she can’t fix anything, but it’ll help.” She’s right. I dig my phone out of my pocket.

  Me: Can you come to Florida? Something happened and I don’t want to be alone. Jenny’s here but…

  Gretchen: Of course! Everything okay?

  Me: Not really

  Gretchen: Are you hurt?

  Me: No. But my girlfriend was shot and is in the ICU

  Gretchen: I’ll be on the next flight

  30

  Rex

  “For fuck’s sake, Rex. You look like hell.”

  This is not the voice I wanted to hear, let alone expected. I’ve been sitting in the ICU waiting room for hours. Day turned to night long ago. Cooper left to take Jenny to the airport and collect our things from the hotel. They were more than willing to delay checkout due to our circumstances.