One Last First Date

by Kate O'Keeffe

  “. . . and it’s so annoying because I’d actually already provided a report on that last week! Portia is impossible,” Paige complained as we took a seat on one of the benches.

  “Oh, that’s no good,” I cooed, having no earthly idea what she was talking about, my nerves threatening to swallow me up.

  “Hey, Paige?”

  She raised her eyebrows. “What’s up?”

  “I . . . err—” My mouth went dry. I had practiced what to say to her so many times in my bathroom mirror at home, but now that it came down to doing it, I had no clue where to begin. I forced a smile as I clenched my fists by my side. It was time to pull my big girl panties up. “I have a question. You know the beach pact? Well, I have a question. What happens if someone, I don’t know, breaks the pact or something?”

  “Breaks the pact?” she shrieks as though I’ve suggested we murder someone or start farming babies or something.

  I look around the park. No one was looking at us. Nevertheless, I lowered my voice in the hopes Paige will follow suit. “Sort of. It’s just . . . I was thinking . . . maybe just a little?”

  “Cassie. You either break the pact or you don’t. There’s no such thing as breaking it ‘a little.’”

  I nodded at her like one of those bobblehead figures you see in the backs of people’s cars. “Okay. Got it.”

  She gave me a sideways glance. “Are you asking because you’re thinking of breaking our pact? Has something happened with Parker?”

  My tummy clenched at the mention of his name. Parker was my next conversation.

  “It’s a hypothetical question, that’s all. I’m interested in knowing what could happen if say . . . Marissa decided she was going to break our pact.” Wimping out much, Cassie?

  Her eyes widened. “Marissa’s going to break our pact? Why? She’s never said anything. I thought she was still looking for the perfect guy.”

  Wow. This is much harder than I thought it would be. “I don’t think she is, but what if she was? What would happen?”

  Paige leaned back in her seat, letting out a puff of air, her face serious. She sat like that for an uncomfortably long time. “Breaking the pact is a serious crime, Cassie. A serious crime.”

  Despite my climbing anxiety, I scoffed. “It’s hardly a crime, is it?”

  “Well, she’s not going to go to prison for it, but there will be consequences.”

  “Such as . . . ?” I lead.

  She leaned in toward me. “Probably one of two things. Either the Goddess of the Beach will intervene and what was meant to be will be.”

  Well, that’s not so bad. I could live with that.

  “Or Marissa will never be happy and die a lonely, old woman.”

  Ah.

  I swallowed. “Okay. Good to know.”

  She narrowed her eyes at me. “You know what? I didn’t come down in the last rain cloud, you know. Something’s up, isn’t it?”

  A pang of guilt hit me, smack, right between the eyes. Paige was going to be devastated—either that or she’d turn into a homicidal revenge queen. Either way, this was not going to be pretty.

  I looked down at my hands. “Yeah, kinda.”

  She moved to the edge of her seat. “You’ve broken up with Parker?”

  I curled my toes. “No. I’m going to, though.”

  She recoiled from me. “Why? After all you’ve been through? And he only just told you he was in love with you!”

  She was right, it was totally illogical. But then, love wasn’t exactly famed for being rational, was it?

  “I . . . err . . . I fell in love. With someone else.” I looked up at her, my chest tight.

  Her face was incredulous. “You did? Who?”

  “Well, that’s the thing. It’s . . . well, let me just say I didn’t plan it this way.”

  “Okay,” she said slowly. “Who is it?”

  I clasped my hands together, almost twisting a couple of digits off.

  When I didn’t reply, she said, “Cassie, tell me.” Her voice was low, devoid of warmth.

  I swallowed. Hard. “Paige, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for it to happen. I never planned it this way.” In my desperation I pulled out the biggest cliché of all time. “It just kind of . . . happened.”

  Her face hardened, her lips forming a thin line. “You still haven’t told me his name.”

  Once again, tears stung my eyes. This was becoming a habit for me. I needed to invest in some waterproof mascara. I bit my lip as I tried to blink my tears away. “It’s Will.” I hung my head, expecting the worst.

  And I got it.

  Paige leaped up from her seat, her hands on her hips. “Will?” she screeched. “Will?! Are you freaking kidding me?!”

  Any hope I had held that people wouldn’t stop and stare at us went down the toilet—right along with Paige’s and my friendship. I jumped up out of my seat. “Look, Paige. I’m sorry. I think I’d wanted Parker to be my Mr. Forever so much I lost sight of the fact he’s not right for me. But Will is. I don’t want him to be, but he is. I’m so, so sorry.”

  She crossed her arms, tapping her foot in agitation. “And how does he feel about you?”

  I looked down at my lap. “He . . . ah . . .”

  I heard her sharp intake of breath. “Oh, my god.” Her hand flew to her mouth as tears streamed down her face.

  I stood up and put my hand on her shoulder. “Paige, I—”

  She recoiled from me, as though I was poison. “No. Don’t touch me. You—” She shook her head at me as she backed away, her face a study in outrage.

  “I’m sorry, Paige. If I could change it, I would. You have to believe me.”

  She turned her back on me and walked away. I didn’t follow her. She’d made it pretty clear she didn’t want to see me right now. I slumped back on the park bench. Well, that went well. I pressed my eyes shut. She was angry and hurt. I knew she would be. And I totally got it. She’d been in love with Will from afar for so long. Him falling for me must have felt like a major slap in the face.

  My only hope was she would understand—eventually. The last thing I wanted was to lose my friend.

  * * *

  Paige avoided me for the rest of the day, not returning my calls, throwing the flowers I gave her in the trash, walking the other way when she saw me in the corridor. I called Will to tell him how it’d gone.

  “I know you’re going to say I’m a dumb guy who has no clue. And you’re probably right. I had no idea she felt that way about me.”

  “You’re right, you have no clue,” I ribbed. I let out a sigh. “She hates me.”

  “She’ll get over it. You two are best friends.”

  I bit my lip. “You should have seen the way she looked at me. It was like pure hatred.”

  “Look, Paige is a great person. She’ll forgive you some day. It might take a while, though.”

  I hoped so. Losing my friendship with Paige was the last thing I wanted—now, or ever.

  * * *

  Knowing how badly it had gone with Paige, when I met Parker later that evening, I was expecting the very worst. I knew I had to tell him the truth. I owed it to him, after all we’d been through: the good, the bad, and the Sara Winston-Smythe.

  For some inexplicable reason, I wasn’t as nervous telling him. Perhaps it was because I’d already done it once that day and the sting had been taken out of it. Or perhaps, I realized with a start, I cared more about Paige than I did about the man I’d hoped for so long would be my husband.

  I met him outside the restaurant in Parnell, a chic suburb close to the city. He greeted me with a kiss on the cheek, and I tried not to stiffen at his touch.

  “Shall we go in?” he asked, oblivious to my reaction.

  “Is it okay if we walk a bit?” I asked.

  He shot me a questioning look. “But our reservation is for seven thirty.”

  “Just a short walk? There’s something I need to talk with you about.”

  “Sure.” He took my arm in his
, and we began to walk down the street.

  I launched right into my spiel, wanting this over as quickly as possible. “I was wondering if . . . if the Universe, or whatever, is trying to tell us something?”

  He chuckled. “What do you mean?”

  “You know, with all the things that have happened on our dates for starters. The jazz ‘cat’ mistake, the golf? Oh, and the best one of all, the date where I punched myself in the face, busting up my nose.”

  He laughed. “Yes, that wasn’t the best first date, was it?”

  “Ah, no. Can all of those things have happened to try and stop us being together? I mean, there have been a lot of date disasters.”

  He nodded, taking in what I was saying. “There have been a few.” He stopped and looked at me. “But no, of course I don’t think that.”

  I chewed the inside of my lip. “I need to tell you something.”

  His face turned serious. “Actually, Cassie, before you do, I have something I need to tell you. I was going to talk to you after dinner, but now is as good a time as any.”

  Happy to put my breakup speech off for a while, I replied, “Sure. What is it?”

  “Well,” he began. He looked suddenly nervous. “I feel terrible doing this to you, but . . . well, here’s the thing.” He swallowed.

  I narrowed my eyes at him. “What is it, Parker?” Is he going to break up with me?

  He began to pace, walking straight in front of a passerby.

  “Watch it, man!” he yelled.

  “Sorry, sorry,” Parker replied, his hand in the air in surrender.

  I took hold of his hand and pulled him over to the side of the footpath, up against an illuminated shop window. I raised my eyebrows in expectation.

  “Okay. Here it is. You know how I told you I was over Sara? That it was you I wanted to be with? Well, I was wrong.” He looked at me through scrunched up eyes, clearly expecting me to launch into some kind of tearful, angry display.

  I blinked at him. “You’re breaking up with me . . . to be with Sara?”

  He nodded. “I’m so sorry, Cassie. I tried, really I did. But when she came to see me last night, we were finally honest with each other. No more games, no more lies.”

  “You’re breaking up with me to be with Sara,” I repeated, as though on automatic pilot.

  “Yes, that’s what I’m trying to tell you.” He looked at me as though I was some sort of low-IQ moron. “We’ve decided to give it another try. I’m really sorry, Cassie.”

  I was faced with a choice. I could either come clean with him about my feelings for Will or—a much more appealing prospect—I could act hurt but accepting. “I see.”

  I watched as he fumbled around how sorry he was and how he hadn’t planned this—all the things I’d said to Paige a mere handful of hours ago. In the end, I even started to feel sorry for him. Parker was a great guy. He was smart and cultured, good-looking, and a real gentleman. In many respects, he was Mr. Perfect. But he wasn’t my Mr. Perfect. Sara was lucky to have him.

  When he looked like he was going to prostrate himself on the ground to ask for my forgiveness, I put my hand on his arm. This had gone on long enough. “Parker, it’s all right.”

  He looked at me with such hope in his eyes, my heart softened. “It is? Oh, Cassie, thank you, thank you.” He clutched my hand to his chest, his eyes wet.

  I decided to come clean. I told him about Will, about how I had only grasped I was in love with him recently, about how I was happy to let him go to be with his true love.

  How I knew more than anything I was with my own.

  We parted as friends, agreeing we would stay in touch and we would always be special to one another. He was my One Last First Date, that had to count for something, right?

  Standing beside my car, I turned to face him. “One last question.”

  He looked at me in expectation.

  “Did you see what was written on my panties on our first date, that night my dress got caught on the stool?” The memory of my “Bite Me” panties flash still stung.

  “No, I didn’t.”

  I nodded. “So the whole crab ‘bite me, bite me’ thing was just a coincidence?”

  He smiled. “I apologize, Cassie, but what are you talking about?”

  I smiled back. “It’s nothing. Bye, Parker. And . . . good luck.”

  “You, too.”

  Chapter 26

  AFTER MONTHS AND MONTHS of dating the man I had expected to marry, I had watched him go back to his ex, fallen in love with another, and lost one of my best friends. So, it was a surprise when I received an email from Paige, instructing me to meet her and Marissa on the beach at ten that night. No explanation, nothing. Just the location and a “See you there.” It was an olive branch, and I was going to grab it with both hands.

  I arrived, on time that evening, ready to have strips ripped off me. And I knew I deserved it. I knew acting on my feelings for Will had hurt Paige deeply. I hadn’t yet given up hope she would forgive me one day, although I didn’t expect it to happen any time soon.

  Will gave me a hug beside the car. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

  “I do. She’s really important to me.”

  “I’ll be here, waiting. Okay?”

  I smiled at him. Will, the man I loved. We’d been dating for three weeks and five days and it was wonderful. Unlike dating Parker, I didn’t feel like I needed to behave in a certain way or cultivate interests I didn’t have. I could just be me. And Will loved me.

  I gave him a quick kiss, flicked on my flashlight, and turned around, walking over the sandy ground to find Paige before my nerve ran off into the night. I climbed up and over a sand dune and over another before I reached the beach. I could hear the waves rolling and crashing on the shore, a light breeze blowing my long hair in my face. I scooped it up into a high ponytail with a band from my wrist—always be prepared—and spotted a bonfire with a couple of figures about a hundred yards away.

  I approached it and saw Paige and Marissa, standing, watching the flames in silence.

  “Hi, girls.”

  They both turned to face me. “Hey,” Marissa said.

  Although angry with me at the time, Marissa had forgiven me, telling me you couldn’t choose who you fell in love with, and if Will was the man I loved, then she was happy for me. I had pointed out it was your family you couldn’t choose, she’d told me not to be a pain, and we’d hugged it out and returned to being the great friends we were.

  Paige, on the other hand, had avoided me like I had a combination of leprosy, The Black Plague, and chicken pox, all wrapped up into one. I was hopeful her asking me to be here tonight was a good sign. Now that I saw the bonfire, I wasn’t so sure.

  I smiled, anxious. “It’s good to see you, Paige.”

  She gave me a curt nod in response.

  “What are we doing here?” I asked, the heat from the bonfire on my skin as it crackled and glowed.

  Paige stepped forward. Without preamble, she launched in with, “Cassandra Clementine Dunhill, as penance, you have returned here to the beach from whence you came.”

  So that’s what this was about: a Beach Goddess thing. I couldn’t suppress a smile. “From whence?” I glanced at Marissa.

  Paige ignored my tease. “Yes. You are here tonight, precisely one year from the date of The Pact, to make your peace with the Goddess of the Beach.”

  I looked from Paige to Marissa. She shrugged, shaking her head. I looked back at Paige.

  “Okay. I will make peace with her.” Anything to get Paige back as my friend.

  “Good.” She put her hand out in front of her, and immediately Marissa added hers. I followed suit. Unlike the first time we stood on this beach, hands piled high, there was no storm brewing. Tonight was warm and calm, the sun having just set below the horizon, casting a faint orange glow on us all. It was quite enchanting.

  We stood in a small circle as Paige began. “We, the maidens of the beach, are here to ask for your
forgiveness. One of us”—she nodded at me to ensure the Goddess knew exactly which one—“has made a different choice. We ask that you allow her to follow her heart.”

  The hope Paige was prepared to forgive me rose inside. “Really, Paige?”

  She gave a short, perfunctory nod. “You deserve to be happy.”

  Tears stung my eyes. Paige had forgiven me? Paige was happy for me?

  “Tell us what price she must pay, oh Goddess,” she continued.

  Wait a minute. Price?

  I watched, openmouthed, as Paige turned her face skyward. Marissa rolled her eyes, buying into this whole Goddess business as much as she did the first time around. And just like the first time, my arm began to get sore from holding it in place so long.

  Eventually, Paige turned her gaze on me. “You must dip in the waters to cleanse yourself. When you emerge, you will be free to follow your heart.”

  “Hold on. You want me to go for a swim? Now?” I looked out at the dark ocean.

  She nodded. “It is the wish of the Goddess. You must follow her instructions or . . . or she won’t be happy.”

  I looked uncertainly at the water. It was ominously pitch black. I swallowed. “Well, if you’re sure.”

  I began to slip my jean jacket off when Paige put her hand on my arm. “Fully clothed.”

  “Paige!”

  She glared at me.

  “All right. But then it’s done, right? The Goddess or whatever will forgive me for not marrying my One Last First Date, and you . . . you’ll forgive me, too, Paige?”

  She chewed her lip. After a beat, she gave a stiff nod.

  My face broke into a broad smile. “Well, then. What am I waiting for?” And, without a backward glance, I ran down to the water’s edge, my dress flapping in the breeze. I didn’t stop to test the waters: I went straight in, running through the waves, thankfully now only lapping against the shore. I ran until the water was knee deep, slowing my progress. I struggled through, the water reaching my thighs. And it was cold. For such a warm summer night, it was quite a shock to the system. I glanced back at the darkened figures on the beach, turned back, and dived under the water.