Shot Through the Heart

by Matt Cain

  As he hit Send he patted Rosie’s stomach and gave her a kiss.

  *

  Billy listened to Mia come to the end of her story and swallowed nervously. He sensed that the audience was gradually softening but he still had to broach the subject of his sexuality. And he had no idea how they’d react to that.

  ‘So, Billy,’ Preston said, turning to face him, ‘obviously the biggest revelation to come out of this whole episode is that you’re gay.’

  Billy cleared his throat and nodded uncertainly. ‘Mmm-hmm.’

  ‘When did you first decide to cover that up from the public?’

  He swallowed croakily and then began. ‘When I first came to Hollywood. I signed with my agent and was told that if I didn’t pretend to be straight then I didn’t stand a chance of making it in movies.’

  Again there were gasps from the audience.

  ‘Oh it wasn’t my agent’s fault,’ Billy went on. ‘He had a point – there weren’t any openly gay actors working in movies. So I didn’t feel like I had a choice. But I did feel really uncomfortable about lying and ever since then I’ve hated every lie I’ve told. But I was scared and frightened and, like I said earlier, I thought that if I did come out then I’d have wound up being rejected all over again.’

  He noticed that the rumblings of disapproval from the audience had completely died down. Because of the bright lights he could only make out the first few rows but the people he could see looked gripped and had moved forward to the edges of their seats.

  ‘And now that you are out,’ Kerry probed, ‘how are you hoping the public will react?’

  He sighed and looked down humbly. ‘Well I’m hoping that they’ll accept me for who I am. And show the world that they’re more tolerant and open-minded than the people running the movie industry like to think.’

  He looked up and out at the audience to address them directly.

  ‘Because I am gay. And despite everything, believe it or not, I’m proud to be gay. But that doesn’t change what happens when I make a movie – when I’m pretending to be someone else. And I’m hoping to prove to you guys that a gay actor can play straight roles. That is, if you’ll accept my apology and give me a shot.’

  There was a murmur of applause from the back row of the audience. Gradually it began spreading, growing louder and louder until it rose to a roar as everyone got up to their feet. Preston and Kerry motioned Billy to stand and as he did so the applause swelled even more.

  Billy couldn’t believe this was actually happening – after all the anxiety, fear and worry he’d been through. But now here he was, telling the world that he was gay and being accepted for it. For the first time in his life he was being applauded for who he really was, not an elaborate lie he’d erected to hide his true self. And after years of chasing affirmation, he finally understood how it felt to be genuinely loved.

  He could see Mia trying to smile at him but struggling to hold back tears of pride. He could feel himself welling up but his tears were kept in check by a rush of sheer joy. Without doubt this was the happiest moment in his life. And he couldn’t help wondering if back home in Mississippi his parents were watching.

  ‘So one more question,’ Kerry began shouting over the applause.

  Billy slowly sat down again, still beaming with joy. ‘Yeah?’

  ‘Now that you have come out as being gay, lots of your fans are going to want to know if there’s anyone special in your life . . .’

  He tried to look serious but couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. ‘There isn’t anyone, no,’ he managed. ‘But for the first time in my life I guess I’m now free to fall in love. And I can’t wait.’

  *

  Sitting watching TV in Mia’s office, Hector wiped the tears from his eyes.

  For an incurable romantic, the scene playing itself out on screen was much more moving than any movie. Billy was standing up and telling the world that he was ready for love. And it was a wonderful, special moment.

  As a gay man Hector could also appreciate that he was witnessing a key moment in history. Gay people he knew in Hollywood had wanted this to happen for so long and understood that nothing would change until it did. Someone needed to be brave enough to stand up and be counted, to challenge those who forced gay actors back into the closet. And now, unbelievably, Billy Spencer was doing just that. Sure, he’d had to be dragged out of the closet by Violet Vaughn, who Hector had always thought was a nasty piece of work. But now that he was out, he was handling it all brilliantly. And he was even getting a standing ovation!

  Hector looked at the screen and blinked to check that it was all definitely happening. But there was no doubt; right now, before his very eyes, Billy Spencer was in the process of changing the world.

  *

  ‘And how about you, Mia?’ Preston asked, turning to face her. ‘Is there anyone special in your life at the moment?’

  Mia froze in her seat. She hadn’t expected this to happen and wasn’t at all prepared. But as she looked round at everyone’s smiling faces she realized that if Billy was being honest with the world then she could hardly hold back from doing the same.

  ‘Erm yeah, there is someone, yeah,’ she stammered. As soon as she said the words she began growing in confidence. ‘He’s British, he’s a photographer and his name’s Leo Henderson.’

  Kerry didn’t bother to conceal her delight and let out a little squeal. ‘And dare I ask if the First Lady of Love is finally in love?’

  Mia giggled bashfully. ‘You know what, Kerry, I used to hate that nickname. I used to totally hate it. But I’ve started to love it now because it’s true – I am the First Lady of Love.’

  She turned to address the audience.

  And I love you, Leo. Did you hear that? I love you.’

  ‘Hold on a second,’ called Preston. ‘Is he here right now?’

  ‘He is, yeah – somewhere.’

  ‘Well come on, Leo. Come out and show yourself.’

  Once more the audience fell silent as everyone looked around them, craning their necks to catch the first glimpse of Mia’s man.

  After just a few seconds, Mia saw him stepping out of the shadows. And as he walked towards her, he looked more handsome than ever. Just then she realized that she’d never loved him more than she did at that moment. And she never wanted the moment to end.

  Leo walked up onto the set and Mia rose to greet him. He strode over to her and stopped to smile with his beautiful wonky grin.

  ‘I love you too, princess.’

  He picked her up and swept her around in his arms.

  Mia was so happy she thought she would explode.

  And from the sound of the applause all around her, the audience felt just the same.

  *

  Serena turned away from the monitor and dabbed at a tear in her eye. It was a beautiful moment which she would happily revel in forever. But there was one important thing that Mia had asked her to do. And after everything that had happened, she wasn’t going to let her down.

  She looked around for Violet and caught her rather desperately pleading her case to a lowly production assistant. ‘Oh I know they seem angry right now,’ she overheard her simpering, ‘but they’ll soon come round when they see I was right all along.’

  ‘Yeah well I wouldn’t count on it,’ Serena interrupted. ‘I wouldn’t count on it at all.’

  Violet looked at her and her face hardened. ‘But Serena,’ she hissed, ‘even you have to admit that what I did was genius.’

  ‘Genius?’

  ‘Yes, Serena. I take it you understand that word. And understand this – thanks to me this picture is going to have one mother of an opening weekend.’

  Serena laughed in disbelief. ‘But Violet, this isn’t just about the Box Office. Don’t you see? This is about real people with real lives and real feelings.’

  ‘Feelings?’ she snorted. ‘Feelings?’

  ‘Yes, Violet, feelings. Obviously something you don’t understand. Which actually makes
things easy for me. Because it means I don’t have to feel bad when I fire your ass.’

  ‘Excuse me?’ gasped Violet. ‘But do you have any idea who you’re talking to?’

  The entire production team tore themselves away from the monitors and gathered round to stare at the two women, who were now standing just a few feet apart.

  ‘Sure I do, Violet. And I’m telling you that you’re fired.’

  Violet looked at her and turned up her nose. ‘For your information, I take orders from my client and my client only – not some trashy broad from Harlem.’

  ‘Well that’s just as well. Because this trashy broad from Harlem has already spoken to your client. And if you didn’t hear me the first time, here it is again. You’re FIRED, Violet. And no doubt Billy will be firing your ass too.’

  Just then James pushed his way through the production team and nodded determinedly. ‘I think we can safely assume my client will no longer be requiring your services. Or any of my other clients for that matter.’

  ‘Ditto!’ echoed Serena.

  Violet looked like she’d been punched in the face from both directions.

  ‘Now get your bony ass out of my sight,’ barked Serena.

  Violet ran her fingers through her hair with a look of absolute panic. ‘Well I . . . I . . .’

  ‘You heard me!’

  Violet looked around her and gave a loud huff. She opened her mouth as if to say something but then closed it. She turned on her heels and scurried off.

  Hell, that felt good, thought Serena, beaming with satisfaction. I might be a broad from Harlem but I sure took a bite out of her ass.

  *

  Mia melted into Leo’s arms and felt his lips move forward to meet hers. Her heart soared as she dissolved into his kiss.

  ‘I’m so happy,’ he whispered. ‘Thanks for making me so happy.’

  ‘Me too,’ mouthed Mia. ‘And in case you didn’t hear me the first time, I love you, Leo.’

  ‘I love you too, Mia. Forever and ever and ever.’

  Mia hugged him tightly.

  She felt like she was living out her very own happy ending.

  Epilogue: Six months later

  ‘And the Academy Award for Best Actor goes to . . . Billy Spencer.’

  A rather emotional Billy slowly stood up and began making his way through the auditorium towards the stage. He hadn’t heard so much applause since his now legendary appearance on The Preston and Kerry Show. And this time it was coming to him from some of the biggest players in Hollywood.

  As he walked up the aisle he spotted Lucy Cantrell and Randy Foster on his left while on his right he saw Tyler Bracket and Hunter Kelly, whose recent comeback had relaunched him firmly onto the A list. As he climbed the steps onto the stage he looked out and recognized Hollywood legends like Bolt Stephens and Cooper Kelly as well as movie tough guys such as Buck Andrews and Denver Jones. And he couldn’t get over the fact that they were all cheering him.

  He walked over to collect his Oscar and gripped it firmly in both hands. It was an incredible moment.

  ‘Thank you, thank you,’ he began, utterly overwhelmed.

  He cleared his throat before starting his speech.

  ‘You know, when I was first dragged out of the closet, I said that I wanted to prove that an openly gay actor could succeed in a straight role. Well I guess I just have.’

  The applause that greeted this comment was so forceful that Billy actually staggered back on the spot. He recovered his composure and repositioned himself in front of the microphone.

  ‘There are several people I’d like to thank,’ he announced, ‘and the first is my wonderful boyfriend Hector.’

  Again there was a round of applause.

  ‘Hector, you’re a very special man. You’re the most loving and giving person I’ve ever met and you’ve made me very happy.’

  *

  Sitting in the audience next to Billy’s empty seat, Hector glowed with pride. Today was turning into the most incredible day of his life.

  It had got off to a shaky start when he’d bumped into Scott Lamont on the red carpet. He hadn’t seen Scott since he’d told Mia’s trainer Cole that he was cheating on him and Cole had promptly dumped him. But just when Hector was about to disappear into the crowd to avoid him, Billy had sensed his discomfort. He’d given him a little kiss on the cheek and suddenly none of it mattered anymore.

  Hector was so lucky to have found Billy and so utterly, completely in love with him. He might only be the son of Cuban immigrants but Billy made him feel like the most special man on the planet. They’d got together shortly after Billy had been outed, just when he’d been starting work on his new movie, Kissed by a Devil. The film was now finished and just that morning a critic from Variety who’d seen an early preview had called Billy’s performance a ‘tour de force’. With that and his Oscar win for War of Words, it looked like Billy’s success was secure, at least for the near future.

  Hector looked forward to being around to share it with him.

  *

  As she sat feeding baby Mia, Rosie’s eyes were fixed on the screen.

  ‘Well I hate to say it,’ she gushed, ‘but Billy Spencer is one smoking hot guy – straight or gay.’

  Ronnie tried ignoring her and reached for another sweet. Since giving up cigarettes he’d developed a new addiction and it was proving almost as difficult to kick.

  ‘Will you lay off the candy,’ nagged Rosie, her tongue lodged firmly in her cheek. ‘If you carry on you’re going to finish up with one mother of a fat ass.’

  Reluctantly Ronnie dropped the packet of sweets onto the coffee table, next to an award of his own; he’d recently been made Paparazzo of the Year for his now infamous shots of Mia and Billy pretending to make out in her bedroom window. Since then he’d been on a roll, nailing exclusive after exclusive and finally stepping out from Leo’s shadow to make a name for himself as one of the most successful paps in town.

  ‘Man, he is so hot!’ Rosie continued, gazing at Billy on screen. ‘I bet he doesn’t eat candy.’

  Ronnie sat back and let her comments wash over him. She might be an expert at winding him up but deep down Ronnie knew now more than ever that Rosie was his soulmate. And besides, there was no need to be jealous of Billy Spencer anymore. Not only was he gay and spoken for but he had nothing that Ronnie didn’t have himself. In fact, Ronnie couldn’t help thinking that he now had everything he wanted in life: a fantastic wife, a thriving career and a gorgeous baby girl. He listened to her gurgle and could feel the love welling up inside him.

  As Rosie fondled the tips of his sticky-out ears, he turned to look at Billy on the TV screen. He felt genuinely ecstatic for him.

  *

  ‘I’d also like to thank the public,’ Billy went on, ‘for restoring my faith in human nature. You know, another thing I said when I came out was that what had kept me in the closet was fear – and more than anything else fear of rejection. But if I’d known how things would turn out, I wouldn’t have hidden away for so long. Because it’s only now that I’ve learnt an important lesson in life – that honesty is the key to happiness. And right now I’m happier than I’ve ever been.’

  *

  As she listened to his speech with a lump in her throat, Serena thought back to the stresses and tensions of the week in which Billy had come out. It had been such a turbulent time and back then she’d had no idea how well everything would work out for them all.

  Sitting next to her in the auditorium, Mitchell threaded his arm through hers. She knew that the Oscars was his least favourite night of the whole year and once again she was grateful to him for making the effort and coming along to support her. Recent events had made her appreciate him more and more and right now she felt closer to him than ever. They were even talking about trying for a baby and tonight had agreed to miss out on the parties and go home straight after the show to give it their first shot. If they didn’t make use of the next few days, they’d have to wait a whole month
as very soon Serena was due to fly over to New York. She’d agreed to give a talk to the girls at her old high school about making it in the movie business, and while she was there was also setting up a new initiative to inspire African Americans from underprivileged backgrounds.

  She snuggled into Mitchell’s arm and gave him a smile. She was looking forward to going home.

  *

  Far away in India, Violet wondered how the Academy Award ceremony was going and if Billy had won the Oscar for Best Actor. She had no access to TV or the internet so had no idea what was happening. The sense of impotence was infuriating.

  Violet had left Hollywood shortly after the premiere of War of Words, when one after the other her clients had fired her. She’d flown to a Buddhist retreat not far from Varanasi in Northern India and had spent a few weeks practising yoga and meditation, eating curried tofu, and pretending to be interested when talking to dreadlocked hippies from Sweden. But the truth was that she’d never been remotely interested in the Buddhist way of life and soon had opted out of all activities, preferring instead to stay in her room, where she became consumed with plotting her Hollywood comeback. Of course, she knew that feigning remorse and reflection would be a key stage on the road to her relaunch – and nothing ticked that box quite like Buddhism. Whatever people might say about her, Violet Vaughn sure as hell knew about PR. And right now she was her own number one client.

  As she looked out over the Ganges, her thoughts darted back to Hollywood and today’s Academy Awards ceremony. She really hoped that Billy won his Oscar, not for his sake but for her own. An Oscar would prove to the world that her strategy had been right all along. An Oscar would expose the stupidity of everyone who’d doubted and deserted her. An Oscar would secure her comeback.

  As far as Violet was concerned, you could forget Buddhism – coming back to life in Hollywood was the only reincarnation that held any interest for her.

  *

  Billy knew that he was approaching the most difficult part of his speech and he took a deep breath.

  ‘You know, it’s no secret that not everybody has embraced the real me as easily as the public. Unfortunately, back home in Mississippi my parents still won’t accept that they have a gay son. It makes me very sad not to be able to thank them today and to share my happiness with them.