by Holly Rayner
I wish you all the best in your scientific pursuits.
Madeline Palmerston
Maddy read the note several times before she printed it out and placed it in an envelope, which she folded and put into her wallet.
She would leave it for him the night before she left. It was a coward’s way out, she knew, but if Akim could be cold and distant, so could she.
At least she would give him the courtesy of letting him know she would be leaving. It was far more than he had ever done for her.
FOURTEEN
The weekend passed by uneventfully. Maddy’s stomach continued to grow, and she spent a lot of time talking and making plans with her mother. When Monday arrived, she was fully prepared to leave her letter of resignation on Akim’s desk and head to Portland the next morning.
She got into the office later than usual, and her team was surprised to see her walking in last.
“What?” she asked with a smirk. “I’m allowed to come in late, sometimes.”
If there was one thing she would regret, it would be leaving her team without leadership and without warning. She considered telling them all before the day was out, knowing that if she asked them to keep her secret, they would. Still, it would do no good. She had already lied enough, but it was all for their protection, and she had to remind herself of that every time the truth nearly slipped out.
She headed to her lab station and logged into the computer, getting to work as though she wasn’t preparing to be gone by the next sunrise. Diving deeply into some lab results, Maddy was reading a sentence about chromosome levels when her head grew light and her abdomen was hit with a sharp pain.
“Agh,” she moaned, placing a hand against her temple as her vision turned spotty, and finally went black as she toppled off her chair.
She could hear flashes of conversation, and what seemed like seconds later she was able to open her eyes for a brief moment. Everyone was blurry, a series of blobs hovering over her.
“Please give us some space while I take her vitals, sir.”
Someone whose outline looked like Akim stepped back.
“She’s blinking! She’s regaining consciousness! Maddy, can you hear me?”
Maddy’s head rolled slightly to the side, but it was the only movement she could make.
“They’re going to take you to the hospital, Maddy. Everything’s going to be okay. I won’t leave your side.”
Maddy knew then that she had to be dreaming. There was no way Akim would promise such a thing, after he had been so hands-off all this time. Not wanting to think about it, she fell back into warm, blissful unconsciousness.
***
A bright light pressed against Maddy’s eyelids, enough to wake her from her slumber. She squinted, cracking open one eyelid at a time.
She was propped up. It was the first clue she had that she wasn’t in her own bed at home. When her focus cleared, she realized that she was in a hospital bed, covered with a very cozy blanket.
Too cozy for a hospital.
Glancing around the room, her gaze landed on Akim’s sleeping form. He was seated upright, his neck tilted back, his mouth slightly open as he breathed in and out. His arms were crossed, like he had fallen asleep while on guard duty or something. The sight of him warmed Maddy’s heart before she remembered she had been planning on leaving him. What day was it, anyway? How long had she been out?
Maddy shifted, her body stiff and uncomfortable. The creak of her mattress instantly woke Akim up, and he started, a hand going straight to the corner of his mouth, lest there be any drool there. It was almost enough to make Maddy smile.
Almost.
Akim’s gaze melted into hers, and in his eyes she found an emotion she couldn’t name, or perhaps was too scared to hope she could.
He leaned in and gently took her hand. “How are you feeling?” he whispered.
Maddy stared at their joined hands for a moment. Who was this man sitting beside her, and what had he done with the cold, callous CEO she had had the displeasure of procreating with?
“I’m feeling like you can talk at conversation level now, instead of whispering,” she said.
Her throat was dry, and her voice sounded hoarse. Akim noticed this, and stood.
“You must be terribly thirsty. I’ll fetch a nurse.”
Maddy almost told him not to, that it would simply be easier if he left, so that she could move on, but she needed to hear that her babies were okay.
Akim returned shortly with a nurse who carried a large mug of ice water, and a doctor, who sat down by Maddy and began taking some vitals.
“How are you feeling, Miss Palmerston?”
Maddy took a moment to evaluate how she felt. Meanwhile, Akim sat on her other side and stared at them all anxiously.
“I feel okay,” she said.
She still felt groggy from just waking up, and generally felt tired, but that was nothing unusual. The doctor nodded.
“How are the babies, doctor?” Maddy asked nervously.
She felt, rather than saw, Akim perk up a bit at her question, as though he were dying to know the same thing. She cast a curious glance at him before looking back at the doctor, waiting for her answer.
“All four seem to be in good health, though now that you are awake I would like to do another ultrasound just to be certain. Tell me, how have you been sleeping?”
Maddy glanced down at her hands with a guilty expression. The truth was, she had been trying to get a decent sleep for a very long time, but her mind refused to cooperate. Instead she’d simply gone into work, practically living there until she realized she didn’t want to anymore.
Her expression was enough for the doctor to guess.
“You fainted, Miss Palmerston, because you are overworked and stressed. I understand ambition, but your body is trying to grow four humans at once. You need to accept that, and take the necessary steps to get the rest you need for them to develop properly. All right?”
Feeling properly chastised, Maddy nodded, looking down at her folded hands.
“But, you said they’re healthy, right? All of them?”
The doctor gave a firm nod. “As far as we can tell, all five of you are in good health. You’ll simply need to take it easy moving forward.”
The doctor looked at Akim then, and his expression was stern. “I understand you are Madeline’s employer? With all due respect, Sheikh, I don’t really care how rich or famous you are. You need to ensure that Madeline gets the rest she needs, so she and her babies can be healthy.”
Akim’s eyes were dark. There were deep circles beneath them that Maddy hadn’t noticed before, and small worry lines along his perfect forehead. Was she the reason for those?
“I understand. Thank you for your help, doctor.”
After checking a few more of Maddy’s vitals, the doctor and nurse left, closing the door behind them. When they did, Maddy finally looked back at Akim, who looked positively tortured. He fell to his knees on the floor, pleading with her.
“Please forgive me, Maddy,” he sobbed.
She stared at him in complete disbelief, her hand limp as he held onto it tight. She waited while he pulled himself together, and once he did, he also pulled an envelope from his front pocket.
It was her resignation letter.
“I found this after you passed out. I’d just gotten into the office when one of your team ran down the hall looking for help. When I saw you unconscious on the floor, I nearly lost my mind. I opened your wallet to look for an insurance card or anything that could help us until the EMT staff arrived, but all I found was your letter. Maddy, when did you plan on giving this to me?”
His gaze was filled with anguish, and Maddy almost felt bad for him. Then she remembered just how hurtful his silence had been all this time, and she pushed down her sympathy.
“Yesterday. I was going to leave it for you when I left work. I have a flight booked for Portland, so my parents can help me raise the babies.”
“An
d is that what you truly want?”
Maddy stared at him for a moment before her eyes filled with tears. For some reason, being in a hospital, having herself and her children in danger, she realized she was unable to lie to him. He had to know how she really felt.
“Of course not. What I want is a man who doesn’t get me pregnant and then leave. What I want is the father of my children to be with me every step of the way, doing all the things fathers are supposed to do, taking care of me when I’m not feeling well. I have been forced to look after myself and my—our—four children this whole time, and I can’t do it anymore. I don’t want to leave Elbazzar. I consider it my home now. But I need my parents’ help. I need help. I can’t…”
Maddy began to cry, and Akim sat on the bed and took her in his arms. Resistant at first, she finally melted into the embrace and allowed herself to cry out weeks of loneliness, uncertainty and fear. He let her cry for as long as she needed before she finally pulled away from him, and he wiped away a tear with his thumb.
“You’re right, Maddy. I have been worse than a fool. I have been selfish, and I’ve kept you at a distance, because… Well, the truth is, I was afraid to admit how I really feel about you.”
Maddy stared at him, confused. Akim shifted so that his arm rested around her shoulders, and she nestled in, in spite of herself. She shouldn’t be so quick to forgive, after everything he had done, but it felt so right being close to him that her body refused to listen to reason.
“I haven’t been on a business trip, these past few weeks,” he said. “I’ve been up north, visiting my father.”
Maddy remembered their conversation, how his father had gone cold and distant after his mother died. She was surprised by this revelation.
“I needed to see him, to understand why I was acting the way that I was. The truth is, Maddy, the night we spent together was one of the best nights of my life. My attraction to you was deep and powerful, and it scared me. I pushed you away because I believed it was the best thing for us, even as the hurt in your eyes cut me to the bone. When I saw my father, it made me realize that there was a very obvious reason I was pushing you away.”
Maddy listened intently. She nearly pinched herself. Here she was, in a hospital bed, getting what was sounding like a confession of love from the man who had been breaking her heart slowly and tortuously for months. Could she really believe it? Could she believe in him?
“My mother’s death destroyed my father” he whispered. “Deep down, I realize now, I didn’t want to end up like him. I thought if I could keep you at a distance, keep things professional, then I wouldn’t lose the most important thing in the world to me if anything ever happened to you. I wouldn’t lose you like my father lost my mother.”
Maddy’s eyes filled with tears again. She reached out and held tightly to Akim’s hand. “You aren’t your father, Akim. You’re strong, and so am I.”
“My mother was strong, too, and she was still taken. A multiple birth pregnancy is very dangerous, Maddy. I couldn’t stand the thought of something happening to you.”
“And yet you know what it feels like to be a child with an absent father,” she countered, and Akim’s shoulders slumped. “Don’t do that to your own children. Even if something were to happen to me, how much better off would you have been had your father done everything he could to love you instead of grieving the loss of your mother for the rest of his life? How will your children feel if you do that to them?”
Akim’s thumb slid along the back of Maddy’s hand, and he finally braved a look at her.
“You’re right, of course, and I see the error of my ways. With your forgiveness, I would like to be a part of their lives, and yours, for always. I’m ready to be the father they deserve, Maddy, and the supportive partner that you deserve. I’m ready to be there for you, no matter what comes. I know it will take you some time to forgive me, but if you can…”
Maddy placed a gentle finger against his lips, silencing him. She leaned in and kissed him gently, a silent blessing of her forgiveness that spoke volumes. Akim kissed her back firmly, letting her know that he was all in and ready to be there for her and the children.
Her heart soared as they held each other.
“Has someone called my mother?” Maddy asked, realizing suddenly that she must be worried sick.
Akim winced. “I did. I’m afraid she is not very pleased with me.”
Maddy nestled her chin against his chest. “We’ll change her mind. Everything is going to be just fine, you’ll see.”
Akim gave her a gentle squeeze. “I sure hope so. She’s a fierce woman, your mother.”
“Only when she wants to be,” Maddy giggled. “Do you think they’ll let me out of here soon? I’d really like to go home.”
“I believe so. What would you like to do once we’re out of here?”
“Take a shower, first of all. Then something with you, I hope,” she added with a shy smile.
Akim grinned down at her before his smile faded. “Ah, I forgot I’m doing an interview for a show tonight. There have been some leaks about Chlomerol,” he said. Seeing the look of alarm on Maddy’s face, he backtracked. “Nothing about us. No one knows what we’ve done, but they do want to know about the drug itself. I’m afraid I can’t get out of it.”
“It’s all right,” Maddy said. “I’ll just watch you from home.”
“I can join you once it’s done, if you’d like,” he said, his gaze hopeful.
Maddy smiled. “That would be lovely.”
Akim hugged her then, and as she gazed past his shoulders, Maddy allowed her expression to fall just for a moment. Akim would have the chance to really publicize their success, if he so chose. The polls showed that the blackmailing party was losing by a sound margin, so they could feel safe announcing their pregnancy to the world, broadcasting like he had been so excited to do all this time.
Maddy pushed the thought from her mind. She had to learn to trust Akim. If he broke her trust again, she would think about what to do next.
Until that time, she wrapped her arms around him as tight as she could, and didn’t let go for a very, very long time.
***
Akim held Maddy’s hand as they watched the ultrasound technician evaluate the babies before they were permitted to leave the hospital. Her stomach had been increasing to a point where her condition was obvious, and they realized then that they would have to come clean.
“All right, everyone’s looking healthy. It also looks like I might be able to see some genders, if you’re interested in finding out.”
Maddy looked over at Akim, whose expression clearly left the decision in her hands.
“I think we’ll wait until the birth,” she said.
Maddy was surprised by her own answer. She had always been a planner, and she liked having information so that she could accomplish her work to the best of her ability. However, in this instance, she realized she was finally ready for a surprise.
The technician nodded and wiped the ultrasound fluid from Maddy’s belly before granting her some privacy to change back into her clothes.
She glanced shyly at Akim, who gallantly looked away while she dressed. While they had been intimate together, there was still so much that they had yet to share. With a feeling of elation, Maddy realized that they would now have that chance, given Akim’s recent admission. In the many dreams of him she’d had since their night together, his beautiful words were beyond anything even her subconscious could have imagined.
“Are you sure you want to wait until the babies are born to find out what we’re having?” Akim asked, once she was dressed.
She turned back to face him, her expression pensive. “Well, the way I see it is we’re having four children. The odds of varying genders are high, so we might as well just go gender neutral anyway. Besides, we could always dress them the same.”
She was grinning, and Akim laughed.
“How will we be able to tell them apart, then?”
&nb
sp; Maddy winced. “Good point. Once they’re born we’ll assign them all a color, and that will be how we know who is who.”
Akim wrapped his arms around Maddy’s waist, linking his fingers behind her back as he gazed down at her in adoration. Her belly stuck out between them, creating a distance Maddy wasn’t so sure she liked. Or perhaps she loved that he could hug her and the babies at the same time. The important thing was, she was happier than she had been since the night they conceived, and she wanted to bask in the sensation for as long as she could.
Akim’s gaze was warm as he brushed a loose strand of blond hair from her cheek. “And what if they don’t like the color they are assigned?”