Base Nature

by Sommer Marsden

  “But I’ll get pudgy,” she griped.

  “Ha! No way, sister. Pudgy will not ever describe you. If you don’t eat that, you’ll waste away. Now come on.” He pulled her in for one more lingering kiss, his hands holding the small of her back in a possessive and sexy way. “We have to take you down and feed you before Kelly crawls out of her skin. She’s waiting down there like she’s going to be serving a queen or a goddess.”

  Liv grinned. She felt happier than she’d ever remembered. It filled her with a warm glowy drunken feeling. But it also made her nervous. She was so happy she was horrified at the thought of losing it.

  ———

  The first wave hit her like a barrage of white light, noise and motion. The world blurred, going soft around the edges and too bright. Liv set her fork down and gripped the lip of the table. Garrett and Kelly were joking and moving about in the small kitchen but her gasp of surprise drew them both.

  Everything righted itself and she felt fine.

  “Garrett…” Kelly said from the doorway, her voice warning.

  “I know. I see,” he said. He sat across from her and waited.

  “You okay, Liv?”

  “Fine. I just got a little dizzy for a moment.” She reclaimed her fork, determined not to freak out. She was different now, this was to be expected. It would all be fresh and new and a little scary. She took another bite of the best mac and cheese she had ever tasted but a fresh sweep of overstimulation hit her and she was barely able to swallow.

  “I think you need to stop eating,” Kelly said softly. She moved toward Liv but Liv went tense. Not intentionally, it was a natural reaction. Her guard went up and her body went taut with coiled power and awareness. Kelly raised her hands and took two big steps back. “Gotcha. Garrett’s there. Your mate is there.” Kelly kept her voice low like she was addressing a spooked animal.

  Because she is…

  Liv pushed her plate away, heart pounding, ears ringing from the cacophony of sound. Her ears literally ached from the noise and it consisted only of the sound of the leaves outside moving in the wind, the rain tapping the window and the clock’s ever present report. Kelly’s breath sounded like a tornado coming, a freight train of sound. Garrett’s chair creaked when he moved and she winced. “Baby, let’s go sit you down,” he said so softly she knew it would be inaudible to most people.

  And still it seemed as if he was shouting at her. “Yes,” she managed. “I think I need to sit down.”

  He led her to the sofa and the first horrible wave of cramping hit. A spasm like nothing she had ever felt rocked her. Liv feared she would turn inside out, that was how intense the pain was. It settled but then sucked her in, a black void of agony and she clutched at Garrett like she was drowning. She vaguely felt her fingers twist in the soft gray fabric of his Henley. Oddly that registered just as a red wave of pain hit. She threw back her head and screamed. The scream filled her skull, took her under. She lost all sounds but herself.

  In her ears the crickets screeched, the rain was like a siren cracking against the glass with an amazing force, the leaves shrieked like the damned and her own heartbeat sounded like a train coming at her. “Garrett,” she said, her knees buckling.

  “Don’t let her go, Garrett,” Kelly said from very very far away. Another room, another house, another universe.

  His hands settled on her to try to keep her from slipping. The heat of his skin was fire and brimstone. Hell made flesh. She screamed because it burned, she screamed because her own cry hurt her ears. She buckled despite his efforts and her back bowed like it was made of elastic instead of bone.

  “Look at the moonlight, Kelly,” Garrett blurted, his face whiter than any living man should be.

  “There is no moonlight, Gar,” Kelly boomed, though Liv knew she was whispering. “Imagine moonlight, Liv. White and shiny like the light of heaven. Imagine it flowing around you and in you. In your mouth, in your nose, your ears. Radiating out of your fingertips and off your hair. Shooting out of your toes. Bathing you like a shiny shower of stars and snow. Picture that, girl. Garrett’s here. We have you. It’s okay.”

  Garrett blew out a sigh and said, “Jesus Christ.”

  Liv wanted to tell him not to worry. That what Kelly had said had helped. It didn’t hurt as bad and she was fine and not to feel bad that he had panicked. It was all okay. And him being this upset just meant he loved her more than she thought. But all of that got lost because the moonlight stopped rippling and enveloping her when the next wave hit.

  Liv clawed at the rug, the sofa, Garrett—anything in reach—and she howled with her pain.

  ———

  Kelly watched Liv fold in on herself like she was coming unhinged at her joints. She threw her head back, long blonde hair flying around her face. Garrett grabbed for her, his voice soothing and his words a constant stream of nonsense. He looked at her, scared, helpless, angry with himself. She could see it all. “There’s nothing you can do, honey,” she said to him. “All we can do is make sure that she doesn’t hurt herself the first time. You can run her when she’s done turning.”

  Garrett nodded, jaw tight with anger. He kept one hand on Liv even as her body drew up on itself, moving too fast, then too slow. A chaos of shifting molecules and flesh and blood morphing to foreign matter.

  Liv let out one more scream and it was done.

  She was golden like wheat in the sun. Her eyes a fierce brown that made him think of wild things and the hunt.

  Garrett blew out a sigh of relief, gathered the new panting wolf to his chest. He kissed her muzzle, looking so faded by worry Kelly was truly concerned for his health. But he was fine and so was Liv. She smiled. “Good. Now you can let her calm down and you can shift and you can take her for her fir—”

  Someone started pounding on the already compromised door like an angry god come to collect its due.

  ———

  Too Fast

  Garrett nearly ripped the doorknob off, he was so enraged. The jury-rigged hinges protested. Who in the hell would be knocking like that now? The only two people on God’s green earth who even cared where he lived were here right this moment. Who else could it be?

  He opened the door and his brain did a double take. He didn’t really have time to react. He registered a malicious face—the sharp jaw, the pointed nose, the dark hair. Silver dashes of rain sparkled around the person for a moment and then a hot stab of pain filled him. It wasn’t the rain that flared bright. Something else.

  Garrett heard Kelly scream and felt his legs start to collapse under him. Why was he sitting? Why? But then he smelled it. His own blood flowing from right where his heart sat in his chest. The trickle had turned to a gush. This was not enough to kill him, surely not. He was a fucking wolf. This would not kill him, it was just a bullet, a regular old bullet. He could smell the lead and the gunpowder. No silver here.

  His back hit the wall and Kelly was grabbing at him, her hands cold on his face, her words a mumbling background to the roar of blood in his ears.

  Garrett looked up into Kevin’s smiling face. He had a second to realize that he wished the man dead and then a blur of blonde fur and gnashing teeth shot past him and the other man was gone from the doorway.

  ———

  “You need to wake up, you know.”

  She was small but long, like one day she would be a very tall young lady. Her hair a dark auburn mess whipping around her head in the wind. Her eyes, clear green like glass washed smooth by the tide and then washed up on the sand. “I’m tired.”

  And he was. He was so damn tired. All he heard was the rush and tumble of the waves on the shore. He didn’t want to hear the rest. Somehow he had screwed it all up. Again.

  “This isn’t like you and if you leave Liv to herself now…she is getting the same thing from life she’s always gotten.”

  “Disappointment?” That hurt his heart to think it. He didn’t want to disappoint Liv. He loved her. Loved her more than he had realized till fa
te had plopped him here on the imaginary beach where apparently your mind went when your body died.

  “No. Solitude. And that is much worse.”

  Great. He was cursing Liv to more solitude if he caved in and died. Garrett barked out a laugh. His chest burned, his head swam. “Who the hell are you anyway? I was expecting at the very least Eileen if I was going to hover on the cusp of death. Are you an angel or just a figment of my lunacy?” Either was possible, he knew.

  She sat down then, cross-legged in the sand and smiled. He saw Eileen in that smile and his soul swelled with love and recognition that he still couldn’t quite grasp.

  “My name is Autumn.”

  “But that’s the name—”

  Eileen’s green eyes, the auburn hair, the cut of her jaw and the tilt of her head. “Of your daughter. If you ever had one.”

  “We didn’t,” he breathed deep but his heart cramped up anyway.

  “You did. She was pregnant with me when it happened.”

  “So I lost two of you?” Why was he finding this out now? Wasn’t he in enough pain?

  She nodded, solemn but matter-of-factly. “You did. But you can change all that now. You already love her, all you need to do is be brave. Be brave, Daddy.”

  And then she kissed him.

  ———

  Garrett opened his eyes to Kelly. A steady stream of words burst from her mouth but at first he couldn’t hear them. They were nonsense. Just a string of mumbled sounds that made no real sense at all. “What?”

  The front door stood wide open, blood red wood accenting the dark night sky. He had originally bought the house, partially because of the door. The red door had felt to him like the magical door into a new life. An alternate reality. Now it felt like the door to hell.

  “Bleeding has slowed down.”

  He caught that, grabbed Kelly’s hand. “Where is Liv? How long have I been out?” He was weak and woozy but now he was scared too.

  “She took him down and then he ran and she was right on his heels. They were headed toward the main road, at the crosswalk.”

  “The park across the street,” he groaned. “If she gets him there, he’s gone.”

  “Garrett, she’s probably gotten him by now.”

  “Well, why didn’t you go after her?” he roared so loud he saw spots.

  “I needed to be with you. You were shot and—”

  “It wouldn’t kill me.”

  “It could have!” It was Kelly’s turn to roar. She was no shrinking violet. When it came to temper, Kelly could run with the big dogs. “It was right there next to your heart. You are a wolf, Garrett, you are not a fucking immortal!”

  He bit his tongue to keep from saying something more stupid. “We have to find her.” He studied the hole in his chest. Even as he watched his body constricted, pushing at the foreign object. The dull metal bottom of the bullet started to show. His body would eject it if he left it be. He didn’t have time for that. Garrett pushed his fingertips into his skin and gripped the narrow end of the bullet with his fingertips. He wiggled it up and pulled it free, gritting his teeth and grimacing. He didn’t mind pain but his own blood didn’t exactly make him happy.

  “Jesus. You are stupid sometimes, boy,” Kelly said but took the bloody chunk of metal from him.

  “Let’s go. Maybe we can catch her in time.” He started to shift and Kelly grabbed him.

  “You can’t do that. You’re injured. It could weaken you, Garrett. I’ll shift and you meet us.” Before he could argue she’d flickered and changed. A black wolf with shots of white like small stars over her forepaws. Big amber eyes and a look that said, No arguing, boy. Her clothes puddled around her and she stepped free. Before he could say anything, her paws hit the entryway tile and she was gone into the heavy rain.

  Garrett grabbed his truck keys and ran, feeling clumsy, angry and entirely too human as he went.

  Kelly ran to the main road, nose to the ground. She waited at the side until he came to a stop with the old red pickup. “Did they cross?”

  She responded by sneezing once, hesitated for a car going past and bolted across the street. Garrett waited for another vehicle and then angled the complaining old truck across the street and cut into the side street that held the access road for the state park. Kelly was waiting. She threw her head back but did not howl. The small white winking bit of moon danced under the clouds overhead for a second and then the gloom swallowed it whole.

  Garrett heard it then, from a distance but not too far, an angst-riddled howl. Bone chilling and lingering. She was going to kill him if they didn’t get there in time. In that one sound was all the pain, all the fear, all the abuse of a lifetime of neglect. Garrett wanted to save her by saving Kevin. If he’d could he’d save her from herself. He looked at Kelly, blew his horn and she jumped, baring her teeth.

  “Why are you standing there?” he shouted at her. Her eyes glimmered silver and green in the headlights. “Go! Go get her! I’m right behind you.”

  She only hesitated for a heartbeat and then she turned tail and ran, moving through the underbrush like a ghost. Silent and deadly and hopefully fast.

  ———

  Kelly ran. Ran faster than she thought she had in years, even on the hunt. Hunts were for fun, for food, for rabbits and squirrels and the game of the chase. A snack. A nibble. Exercise. But this was different. This was do or die and Kelly could feel the agony and premature grief of the new wolf in the air.

  Liv thought Garrett was dead. She thought that this man who had obviously hurt her in many ways had now taken from her the mate she had just found. The person she trusted and loved the most in the world. Liv’s energy was damaged but had gotten stronger and brighter and better from the moment Kelly had met her. Garrett’s love, his trust, turning her though it was frowned upon, had done amazing things for Liv. Liv was the treasure you find in the box of junk. Tarnished and ugly but with some polish and elbow grease, you have something priceless. She could give Garrett back his hope for a life and a family and happiness in his heart.

  Kelly jumped a downed tree, smelled a fox nearby, kept going.

  Garrett could be happy again. Garrett could be whole. But if Liv killed she would have to answer for it. Killing a human meant possibility of exposure. Of the pack, of their kind. There were humans who knew of them. Those who aided the pack and had ties to shifters in general, but this was the city and this was strange territory. This was the place where people scoffed at anything not neon and human and automated. This was where people feared the unknown. Anything other than—wolves, shifters, non-humans were an unknown and therefore a threat.

  Another howl and she heard the man scream. No, no, no! Bad dog! Go dog!

  Good. He was still alive. Stupid but alive. Clearly Liv was no dog but he was too small and fearful and cowardly to see what she was. All he could see was what he expected to see.

  Kelly darted under a bush, down a slope clogged with leaves and mud and tore toward the changeling. She could smell fear, hunger, confusion and bloodlust. She hoped she was in time.

  Chapter Fifteen

  The Kill

  All Liv could smell was dirt and rain and what smelled like metal. The copper of pennies, the stink of rust, the odor of stainless steel.

  That’s Kevin’s fear…

  He was gone. Kevin had taken too much from her already. Her self-esteem, her love, her trust. He’d put himself out there as the nice guy to begin with. Then she had given him the chance. Risked the fucking thought of giving her heart and her trust to another man. He’d gotten in and gotten comfy and then it had started in small ways. A harsh word, a manipulative gesture. All the little things that seemed no big deal until you added them all up and got one big ball of controlling man.

  She heard a small animal in the brush and the instinct to give chase reared up but she ignored it. She barreled ahead on Kevin’s heels. She knew she could overcome him if she tried but for that moment in time, the smell of his terror and the sight of him
fleeing were more powerful and intoxicating than any moment of dominance.

  Liv rounded the corner, saw her chance. She pinned him then. Blocked him into a tightly packed copse of trees. The small trees were growing so close together they nearly formed a tall picket fence of birch saplings. She growled, marveling at the natural feel of this alternate skin. The teeth felt deadly but entirely hers, the limbs strong and agile. Her whole head was alive with the smell of the forest and Kevin’s fear. She liked that most of all. It chased away any chance of pain or sadness.

  She had dreamed many times that he was a fear eater. Someone who felt it was his entitlement in life to make someone unhappy and scared and then fed on the twisted, intense emotions he wrung from her like twisting water out of a rag. She sniffed, taking in the smell of his heart racing and his body sweating and his teeth clacking together. His breath changed from panting, becoming dark and sour, gone was the minty smell of his handy breath freshener. His scent became more intense and bitter. Like scorched metal mixed with melted tar. It was the most heavenly of scents to Liv.

  “No, please. Please no. Don’t bite me. Just go. I’ll stay right here and you go. Good doggie, go. Go home, dog! Go home.”

  I’m not a dog, moron. If she could have laughed she would have. But she felt the soft smile on her thin black lips and then she bared her teeth, the growl coming from somewhere low and malicious in the barrel-chested body she was sporting.

  “Please, no. I’ll be good. Maybe this is a sign. I’ve been an asshole. First to Liv and then that creepy guy. Maybe I need to be better.”

  He had thrown his head back and was talking to the sky. His voice soft and desperate. He was talking to God, expecting a bargain.

  No deal.

  She growled louder, her jaws growing tense, her already keen hearing heightening even more, her eyes taking in every flicker, rustle and wave in the night landscape. Her nose picked up the warm, sharp smell of urine before she even saw the dark spot growing on his jeans.

  If she could have clapped her hands right then, she would have. Instead she took a step forward.