Two Halves Whole

by Melissa Abigail

  “Aw, so unfair! We haven’t gotten you to do any dares yet,” Tracy chided.

  Angelique stuck her tongue out at Tracy. “We haven’t gotten you to do any either, Birthday Girl!”

  “As long as I don’t have to lick anything,” Tracy tittered back, her face the faintest rhubarb colour.

  Ryu stared Seth down. Something about his look was hostile. Ryu could tell he was up to something.

  “What are you waiting for, Seth? Go for it.”

  Seth didn’t smile. Everyone watched between them, the tension as high as their anticipation.

  “So…” Seth sneered, certain malice in his tone. “Tell us. Who do you like?”

  Blindsided.

  Pelted with a sack of bricks. Ryu scowled. “Yo, seriously?”

  “What’s the answer? Might as well spill,” Seth pressed.

  Ryu didn’t think. His eyes were drawn like magnets, drawn to Haruna. She stared back, carefully teasing out her bangs. Normally, if he stared hard enough, she’d turn away, look elsewhere. But not this time. She wouldn’t back down. Seth hadn’t been the only one wanting the answer.

  One thing was clear, for certain now. Ryu had made one colossal mistake.

  He shouldn’t have been there.

  He shouldn’t have come.

  "How could you put him on the spot like that?" Gabrielle said, scolding Seth with crossed arms.

  Conscious of the many eyes on them, on him, Ryu tore away and shot to his feet, but not before catching the astonishment on Damon’s face.

  “What do you mean? It’s Truth or Dare. It’s fair game!’ Seth argued.

  “Then you should’ve asked Arlen that! That was the entire point of—”

  Gabrielle clapped her hands over her mouth. Arlen stared in a stupor.

  “What?” Tracy sounded both annoyed and bewildered.

  "I have to go. It's late," Ryu said at last, eyes on him again as he rounded sharply and hurried out. Haruna called after him. Others did too. But all he willed himself to listen to was a voice in the back of his mind telling him he had to get out of there.

  Ryu had almost made it to the front door. Almost—when a rough grip yanked him by the shoulder. He whirled around. The tall, dreadlocked Damon gawked back at him, his eyes rounded with incredulity. Ryu didn’t know how to react. After what seemed like an eternity locked within a sound vacuum, Damon spoke through shallow breaths.

  "You like Haruna? You actually like her, like her? Does she know about what you do?"

  Before any other feeling could come, Ryu felt the anger. He flung Damon’s hand away.

  "What do you think?"

  Damon shook his head, looking more frustrated than Ryu’d ever thought possible.

  "Geez—Ryu, man, you have to tell her."

  "How can I—"

  Funny, the way things happen. It might have been the universe. The will of nature. It could have been the work of a cruel deity that loved to perpetually mess with him for sadistic pleasure. Maybe it was all coincidence. Who knew? But there she was, entering in, steps beyond Damon, and it was as though nothing else existed. Nothing else mattered. Ryu was sure he was only imagining the halo of light around her but… it all hit him at once. A synergy of everything. Passion. Calm. Ecstasy. Sadness. Rage. Haruna. She was the one constant amid disorder that reminded him just how cursed his life was.

  "Are you leaving already?" she asked, her voice small.

  Small and sweet and adorable in a way that made him want to just grab and hold her like he’d wanted to all night.

  Why had he chosen to come here and be confronted with a truth he wasn’t prepared to face? To face it meant this—all of this—was a lie. He wanted to say that he had no room in his heart for a girl that forced him, dared him to feel and question everything and lose his once mastered state of indifference. Because Haruna made him think about life, think about a future… think about things he didn’t believe he’d ever have to care about. And seeing all the others talk about crushes or relationships that meant something so unlike whatever the hell Jackson, Cody or the average gangster had with girls… seeing them, seeing her made Ryu realise something.

  He wanted a piece of that too. Desperately.

  But he couldn’t have it.

  Because having it meant he had to have a conscience.

  Then he really couldn’t live with himself knowing "stuff happened," the stuff he turned a blind-eye to just to survive, just like Seth said.

  Ryu wasn’t an ordinary student at Shady Glenn Academy.

  He was a foot soldier, an assassin, the Devil Half of the city’s underworld; and now he’d gone down the rabbit hole and seen what Wonderland looked like.

  Ryu avoided Damon’s scrutinising eyes and forced a smile that was all but sincere.

  “It’s almost ten-thirty. Shouldn’t you be getting home too? Your grandmother might get upset.”

  Haruna gasped. “Shoot! You’re right! Wait for me, I’ll tell the others!”

  She retreated back to the other room to give her good-byes.

  Ryu’s smile disappeared as she did, and his gaze shifted back to a dubious-looking Damon.

  “A girl like that… I never thought would be your type.”

  “I don’t have a…” Ryu scowled. “Hold on. You saying she’s too good for me or something? An asshole like me shouldn’t get with a girl like her, is that it?” Just say it. It would be the truth.

  “I said none of that,” Damon said, his face unwavering in its seriousness. “Either way, what I say doesn’t matter.”

  “You’re damn right it doesn’t.”

  Damon was unmoved, but his next line came out frosty, subzero cold. “You’re treading water and you know it. So what do you think might happen if you pull her in the swamp with you?”

  CHAPTER five

  the glass half-empty

  “I’m home!” Ryu called out to no one in particular.

  It was quarter after eleven when he had arrived back at the house. He docked his runners on a small shelf, counting at least six other pairs. Must have been a full house. That’s when Ryu realised something else. He shoved his feet into a pair of slippers and bounded through the living quarters, past the television. Just short of reaching the hall facing the kitchen, he saw his guardian, Katsuo. Next, Ryu saw the five boys standing in a mass without a sound among them as they turned to look. It was like the week before, except with one important difference: the person at their centre—Dan.

  “You’re back,” Ryu rasped.

  “Not that you’d give a shit,” Bradley quipped.

  Thwack!

  “Watch your mouth,” Katsuo growled. Albert and Yuan side-stepped as Bradley seared through them and bounded up the staircase, hand at the back of his head where he'd been swatted. Avoiding Ryu’s eyes, the other boys followed. Ryu looked back at Katsuo whose glare was now square on him.

  “Where have you been? It’s late,” Katsuo said, his tone quiet.

  “I was just hanging out with a friend from school,” Ryu explained.

  Katsuo’s dark eyes were studying, unconvinced. No longer waiting for the detailed answer Ryu wasn’t giving, Katsuo pulled something small and purple from the pocket of his track pants. The envelope. The invitation from Tracy’s party. Ryu had left it under his mattress, right at the middle where he’d often placed things he didn’t want others to find. And yet there it was… in Katsuo’s hand.

  “Just hanging out with a friend?” Katsuo repeated, his increasingly stern pitch matching his surly face.

  Ryu thought of a quick save.

  “I was invited. I couldn’t say no. It'll help for me to seem more normal to go to these types of things, right?”

  Katsuo scoffed. “It’s not about seeming normal. It’s about keeping a low profile. Haven’t you forgotten? You’re on probation. Your last hit was a complete failure, and it is only that leg that keeps you from being forced to make up for it.” His scowl deepened. �
��If that girl continues to get in the way…”

  Ryu stiffened. That girl? Katsuo knew he was with Haruna? But how?

  “She isn’t—”

  Katsuo held out a hand. “Don’t think we don’t have means of finding out. If this gets out of control, you better believe we will put a stop to it. You need to keep your priorities straight. The world doesn’t revolve around you.”

  Ryu lowered his gaze to the floor and answered him with a short but simple “yes." Katsuo gave his dismissal. Head bowed, Ryu headed straight for his room. None of it made sense. How did Katsuo come to suspect something was going on between him and Haruna?

  At least so far, nothing was happening. Ryu had made certain of it.

  The ride back to the church where Ryu had picked her up and dropped her off had been freakishly quiet. She was mad at him for not explaining the marks on his arms, and he was mad at himself for choosing such a stupid, highly visible place to make them. She was annoyed because he didn’t care much for her “gift," and Ryu was annoyed at himself for thinking it would be anything different. Lastly, the fact that Ryu never quite answered Seth’s question during Truth or Dare had triggered the types of things he'd dreaded. Expectations.

  Ryu couldn’t focus on this.

  If Katsuo suspected anything, it was going to complicate matters. Worse yet, if word got back to Father, Matsumoto. Syndicate brothers were allowed a select few to swear their allegiance to, and that was to each other. Friends, family, girlfriends, wives or kids, everything else came last. Being on probation, as all of them were until they turned eighteen and got phase-two "adult" initiation, meant there wasn’t even room for last.

  It was the brotherhood or nothing.

  Ryu twisted the knob, feeling a cold draft whittle him down to the bone as he flung the door open. He glared at the top bunk where Tyler lay on his side, flipping through some comic book, the cryptic rumblings of 90’s Metallica set on mid-volume. Ryu beelined for the open window on the other side.

  “What is wrong with you? It’s freezing outside, and you have the window open?” Ryu slammed it shut. This kid never did anything logical.

  “Some of us get a little hot after training all day. Not like you’d know what that feels like anymore,” Tyler snarked.

  Ryu ignored Tyler’s remark. He moved towards the closet, and removed the jacket which he’d borrowed—okay, secretly stolen—from Albert. Ryu unbuttoned his top and stripped down to a vest and boxers.

  “So Dan’s back? Where was he?” Ryu asked.

  “He got mugged. Lost a couple G’s. He was hiding at some friend’s place until the cops found him. Got his ass handed to him by Katsuo anyway. You should have seen it. It was pretty funny.”

  Ryu gave a low sigh. Tyler was such a prick.

  It wasn’t the first time Dan had been reckless. Nevertheless, to actually allow himself to get robbed and of that much money, thousands of dollars? This didn’t seem like the Dan Ryu knew. Maybe Dan had "lost" some of the profits "experimenting." None of them were allowed to dabble in alcohol or drugs at all, but it didn't stop a single one of them. To Ryu, the story sounded bogus, but he wasn’t about to be a rat. Especially not to a selfish, untrustworthy guy like Tyler…

  Ryu froze.

  Untrustworthy Tyler.

  Perhaps Ryu’s next thought had been on Tyler's mind also for he spoke as though telepathic:

  “Bet you had a fun night. Must be nice being able to do whatever you want.”

  Ryu set off like a rocket.

  Climbing—clawing his way to the top bunk, Ryu yanked Tyler by the front of his shirt. Foul words flew between them as the chorus to Enter the Sandman raged on. Tyler fought Ryu’s grip. They lost their balance and tumbled into a rolling heap on the floor. Ignoring the pain that was sure to plague them both once the adrenaline left, they fumbled until after some effort, Ryu found the upper-hand and straddled Tyler, wrenching at fistfuls of his stupid Ed Hardy shirt.

  “You! You went through my stuff?”

  “Yo! Get off!”

  “Answer me! You found the invite! You told Katsuo! Omae shinitai kai?” Ryu found himself seeing stars as Tyler’s elbow connected with the side of his face. He gave in to dizziness and released. Tyler shot up and shoved him back, and they back-rolled in tandem. Once again, they were on their feet. Ryu winced at the faint nip of whiplash in his neck. There was a renewed stinging in his thigh.

  “I couldn’t care less about your life!” Tyler spat, nostrils flaring. “Obviously, if you disappear all night, Katsuo wants to know where you went. You’re the frickin’ favourite, aren’t you?”

  Ryu shifted his eyes, his breaths heavy. Could it be true? Did Katsuo not trust him to the point of searching him? At what point had Ryu slipped up and given himself away? He looked back. Tyler was leering.

  “You’ve got balls. Out hanging with your girl just ‘cause you’re a jobless cripple. Tell me you got some, at least.”

  Ryu scowled. Was Tyler telling the truth about Katsuo? As good as Ryu was in cutting through lies, Tyler was equally good at telling them. But the look in Tyler’s eyes after his last line said it all. It was the same look Tyler had when Haruna had appeared at the front step of Tengoku House for the second time. She’d come looking for Ryu, and the others had since assumed they were dating. It was also the same kind of look Jackson used to give Ryu when he was the leader of their crew.

  Yep. That look was pure envy.

  Must've been because in Tyler’s feeble, delusional mind, Ryu was “getting some” while Katsuo’s girlfriend, Claudia, and his creepy obsession with her remained off-limits. It was hilarious, if not sad. Ryu didn’t know whether to chastise him for his stupidity or laugh at his hate-fuelled jealousy.

  Ryu chose the latter.

  “Yeah. I got something, alright.” A freaking prayer book.

  But Tyler didn’t have to know that.

  Just seeing his pathetic face contort into raw fury was all the satisfaction Ryu needed.

  “You’re disgusting,” Tyler grunted. “The younger guys in this house look up to you—you can’t even do your jobs, so instead you're out partying? What a bad influence.”

  "Sorry? Who's the bad influence? Being Claudia's mutt? Is that your idea of being a role model? "

  "Who's the mutt? You're the half—and you look like hell, too! " Tyler snapped.

  Ryu felt a small sting in his gut, but didn’t show it. He didn't care that Tyler had dissed his looks. So what if Ryu was half, hafu, hapa, mixed, whatever? So what if Ryu didn’t have the coveted light skin or extra inches in height? The kinds of things Tyler had naturally? The kinds of things that made Tyler feel so superior and made Ryu the worst kind of “hafu”? Ryu folded his arms. Being half didn't matter even if Tyler seemed to think such things mattered to the White Flower Syndicate. Tyler must’ve been functioning with only a fraction of his brain—clearly not the part responsible for common-sense.

  Tyler mirrored Ryu’s crossed arms. “I'm the one who should be the Elder. Not you."

  "You know why you'll never surpass me? Because you’re a lunatic. You want big jobs, and you can't even control yourself, let alone be a decent back-up."

  Strange.

  Tyler didn’t seem angered by the truth at all. Instead, he looked amused.

  "Yeah, it's too bad. After the doctor left, I should have pointed all the Roosters in your direction."

  A sinking feeling set in, and Ryu watched a Grinch-worthy grin stretch across Tyler’s face.

  "You heard right. I saw them. There were at least ten of them swarming around just as you crossed the street. But I guess only three made it your way. Too bad."

  There was the strum of an electric guitar. The bashing of cymbals. Like mines exploding on a battlefield one by one, all the dots suddenly had bold and jarring connections. That evening when Ryu had been tasked with completing the biggest hit of his life—taking out Dr. Vincent Yap—Tyler had been the getaway driver. It was the
evening Ryu had been ambushed by the Rooster Kingz. It was a trap that nearly cost him his life. Tyler later claimed that he had phoned Ryu to warn him about cops before driving off. Ryu had missed the call, and nobody knew when the target, Dr. Yap, had bailed, or that the other gang had caught onto them, poised and ready to strike.

  Or so Ryu thought.

  "You knew they were there? You knew?" Ryu’s fingers trembled into fists. The turbo-speed riffs of Galneryus’ Silent Revelation began just as Tyler’s snarling grin grew wider. His eyes were alive with what appeared to be a fine line between pure joy and total madness.

  "That's not all,” Tyler sneered. “There were no cops. I planned to leave the minute I got back to the car. That call I made? It was to tell you to go fuck yourself."

  Ryu lunged. Tyler dodged, but not before backing into and knocking over a stack of books and a desk lamp. A rumble of footsteps and hollering followed as Katsuo thundered into their room, charging like an ox, roaring them into submission. The boys, without so much as a whimper, retook their spots on the bunk bed. Off went Tyler’s music, leaving a sudden absence of sound so deafening it gave Ryu the creeps.

  The entire night Ryu lay restless, one eye open at the enemy directly above him, resigned to the fact that the hit only failed… because Tyler set him up.

  The arrangement was to keep things simple. Casual. Marie and Shin Matsumoto had agreed to meet at a downtown bistro after peak-period when it was just packed enough to remain anonymous and hidden in the crowd, but quiet enough for conversation. Marie had made a cozy spot out of a booth she'd reserved and awaited his arrival, twirling her necklace chain and staring at her watch.

  He arrived at exactly quarter to seven—alone; but, Marie was certain his "security detail" would be somewhere about. She must have been a fool allowing him to visit her anywhere, let alone at this place. But in the end, it felt like the safest. He came to the table, they exchanged their handshakes and gave their introductions, "Hello, my name is Marie," but he insisted on continuing to refer to her as "Ms. Smith." Marie couldn't get past other things too. He was well-spoken, and his English was excellent. This was a quality she didn't expect in such criminals.